FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Am I to nice? Advice please
Am I to nice? Advice please
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By *iftyish OP Man
over a year ago
South Coast |
I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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its nothing to do with too nice it everything to do with there too many men therefor alot are going to get nowhere simply because of numbers ... and it will only get worse more n more men joining not many women or couples joining on top of those leaving the scene too ...
if i was a man in todays scene the only way to get on the ladder is clubs get out and mix with those that swing chat have a laught and hopefully something clicks face to face because once on the ladder things become easier for men thats for sure...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
That's where I'm going wrong! I'm always introducing myself to ladies by saying I'd love to jizz on their baps. Every days a school day! |
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"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
Yes, this is definitely the approach we recommend and is the most likely to work with us. |
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By *akie32Man
over a year ago
winchester |
"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise
That's where I'm going wrong! I'm always introducing myself to ladies by saying I'd love to jizz on their baps. Every days a school day!"
that diserves a pmsl |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Soft gentlemanly chat has to be the way to go. Your aproach is spot on, if not foolproof - woman ate as unpredictable as men.
I doubt there's ever been a man got any further after utilising the old "I'd love to shit in your mouth" opener!!!! |
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By *akie32Man
over a year ago
winchester |
"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
judging by your profile, it gives out the message that you are married, and that will put most off, i know it would us, you say need to be discreate and cant accom sets alarm bells ringing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fella, end of the day you cannot control what other people do.
There’s no such thing as “being too nice”, you just do you and if they block, that’s on them, not you.
"
Solid advice in my opinion.
Everyone is different, so there is only one approach and that is just be who you naturally are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
Personally, I am not on here to get to know people. There’s a difference between an introduction and then also trying to “get to know” someone. But there will be someone who finds your approach interesting. |
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If you’re a nice and polite guy be that. If you’re rude and obnoxious don’t be that. If you enjoy talking dirty with women who you don’t know on here, then give it a whirl. If you’re unsuccessful, go back to being the nice and polite guy.
Basically, be yourself  |
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You can adjust your expectations to be more realistic, to prevent disappointment or thinking it's a specific thing, like being too nice, that's the issue.
It's incredibly hard to get meets for single men here. People have preferences for others and most people are not compatible with most other people.
Use the site tools to help you as much as possible and go to clubs. |
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"Fella, end of the day you cannot control what other people do.
There’s no such thing as “being too nice”, you just do you and if they block, that’s on them, not you.
"
Of course there is such a thing as being too nice.
People who don't have an opinion of their own but just agree with everyone else's.
Those who smother others in compliments just for the sake of it.
There's a long list involving putting people on pedestals and kissing posteriors. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing to do with the way you approach it mate , for every 1 girl there is 10 guys , most of them will be like yourself ,polite and friendly and just being yourself. Half of the 10 will be
wasters, But she still has at least 4 or 5 of those similar messages to yours to click with more.
The clubs are a good shout , I'm in same boat tbh so that's what I'm going to do. |
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"Fella, end of the day you cannot control what other people do.
There’s no such thing as “being too nice”, you just do you and if they block, that’s on them, not you.
Of course there is such a thing as being too nice.
People who don't have an opinion of their own but just agree with everyone else's.
Those who smother others in compliments just for the sake of it.
There's a long list involving putting people on pedestals and kissing posteriors. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing wrong with being nice. Don't change who you are for anyone.
But it doesn't really come down to being nice or not, if you aren't someone's type the you aren't their type. There is no guarantee of anything on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't understand why you've posted this? Are you too nice for what? To get meets? For the site? I am feeling a bit cynical and it just reads like virtue signalling. |
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete."
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would. |
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would. "
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would.
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’ "
 |
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would.
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’ "
I flip you over , lube you up and shove that baguette right where the sun don't shine.
Just keep the mask on and i'm yours. |
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would.
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’
I flip you over , lube you up and shove that baguette right where the sun don't shine.
Just keep the mask on and i'm yours."
Hmmm….the thought of you inserting a baguette into my virginal bagel is rendering me…..curiously aroused… (and additionally really yearning to eat at subway)  |
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U can only b urself ... Iv spoken 2 lots of women couples on this site .everybody is different some ladies who are part of a couple who iv got 2 know really well ad some v naughty texts with but also some v personnel texts with that same person but we've never met ..x |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
I’m far more responsive when I feel like people take the time to get to know me, I think some see this as a free pass to just dismiss a person and see body parts, effort and good conversation go a long way xx |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"OP - if you're as nice as me then YES, you're probably too nice, but I'd rather be seen as being too nice than being known as a complete twat. 
Aren't they one and the same thing?"
Noooo. 'Nice guys' are just a bit of a twat.  |
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By *akie32Man
over a year ago
winchester |
"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would.
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’
I flip you over , lube you up and shove that baguette right where the sun don't shine.
Just keep the mask on and i'm yours."
wouldnt a baguette go soft with lube tho, maybe try something firmer like a bg salami sausage |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Imo there's a balance between being a decent human being and a bit of cheekiness to keep a bit of sexual energy in the chat.
But tbh, I run the risk of mansplaining or whatever it is called if I try and deconstruct too much.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Keep being polite! I hate those long graphic paragraphs about what someone thinks they're going to do to me... Instant delete.
It really does make your stomach churn and give you a snarly face..... don't know why 'strangers' think it's a turn on . Especially when they get to the sex acts that you've never performed and never would.
‘I walk into your room as you lay naked on the bed in lewd anticipation at the sight of me brandishing a baguette, a bottle of lube and wearing a Donald Trump mask…..’ "
Can I borrow that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
Like attracts like. If her profile pic is her pussy dripping with cum she may be more receptive to some sex chat but it's not a dead cert.
Pretty much it depends on her mood and sense of humour.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can sometimes feel like that. I have a terrible guage on when it's ok to do flirty banter so if I avoid it altogether, it can come across as me not being interested by only keeping the conversation light. It's also tough to know when to include it as one of my biggest fears in here is coming across as pushy or crass. |
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"I don't understand why you've posted this? Are you too nice for what? To get meets? For the site? I am feeling a bit cynical and it just reads like virtue signalling. "
Virtue signalling is always going to be the basis of many posts from men simply because of the fierce competition.
Unless a guy can get away with the 'Cheeky Chappie' approach or successfully portray himself as the irresistible suave ladies' man, there is going to be a trend to disassociate oneself from the coarse and crude masses who women are believed to eschew.. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I've been on here a while and chatted to a few ladies. I kept the sex chat to an absolute minimum untill I felt I got to know them in my view being respectful. Surely saying what you would like to do to a certain lady is not the best way to introduce yourself.
Appreciate any advise"
A) no such thing as being too nice…. You just concentrate on being the best “you”!
B) difference strokes for different folks… I could ask the question at what pace people should go to loads of different people and you would get back loads of different answers!
C) beauty of this place is if someone goes at a different speed to you…. Move on! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't understand why you've posted this? Are you too nice for what? To get meets? For the site? I am feeling a bit cynical and it just reads like virtue signalling.
Virtue signalling is always going to be the basis of many posts from men simply because of the fierce competition.
Unless a guy can get away with the 'Cheeky Chappie' approach or successfully portray himself as the irresistible suave ladies' man, there is going to be a trend to disassociate oneself from the coarse and crude masses who women are believed to eschew.."
Ah well, fair play. If it works for some... |
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