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Your BEST one-liner first message

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I've seen a lot of people complain about one-liner first messages. "Hi, how's you" etc. But could you do any better? I'd love to see your most charming first message to woo your intended lover please. BUT it can only be one line.

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By *innocentMan  over a year ago

Littlehampton

Merry Morning,please can we re-enact the scene from Lady & the Tramp; but instead of spaghetti, we could use a foot long sausage roll from Morrisons?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Merry Morning,please can we re-enact the scene from Lady & the Tramp; but instead of spaghetti, we could use a foot long sausage roll from Morrisons?"

That's a cracking first message

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Are you an angel who fell from heaven, because you seem to have seriously mashed up knees, should I call an ambulance?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Show me your tits and ill show you my tattoos..

..Ya know, tit for tat

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By *ussle SproutMan  over a year ago

the middle

Fab my pics for a chance to talk to me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Are you an angel who fell from heaven, because you seem to have seriously mashed up knees, should I call an ambulance?"

Have you just given away your best line, Dangermouse?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Had this used on me one time... Her hey you Wana act out a scene from the 50 shades... Me ehhh yeah sure... Her... Great let's do the one where you buy me a.brand new car ..... Me. Are you joking me ... I wouldn't let you drive cattle lol ha ha her... ( Angry face);

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Show me your tits and ill show you my tattoos..

..Ya know, tit for tat"

Technically two lines, but I will let you off! What if you've already seen her tits though?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Let's cut to the chase.. show me your dick

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By *odgerMooreMan  over a year ago

Nowhere

Would you be interested in my jaffa cakes for blowjobs exchange scheme?

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By *odgerMooreMan  over a year ago

Nowhere


"Let's cut to the chase.. show me your dick "
would work!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Had this used on me one time... Her hey you Wana act out a scene from the 50 shades... Me ehhh yeah sure... Her... Great let's do the one where you buy me a.brand new car ..... Me. Are you joking me ... I wouldn't let you drive cattle lol ha ha her... ( Angry face);"

not much wooing going on!

More than a script really....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Let's cut to the chase.. show me your dick "

Direct. Like it!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hey! You’re hot! Can I put my cock snot in your fart pipe. Works every time.

If ya want a smack in the mush.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Subject: Do NOT read the next line

Message: okay, I see we have a rule breaker should I run or tame ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Show me your tits and ill show you my tattoos..

..Ya know, tit for tat

Technically two lines, but I will let you off! What if you've already seen her tits though? "

Well id imagine if it was outside of fab and i already saw her tits then im way past needing to use that pick up line

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would you be interested in my jaffa cakes for blowjobs exchange scheme? "

Ooh controversial on Fab! Personally I am a Jaffa cake fan but don't let Kinky Biscuit Dunker see this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hey! You’re hot! Can I put my cock snot in your fart pipe. Works every time.

It's the phrase of the week on Fabs!!

If ya want a smack in the mush. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Subject: Do NOT read the next line

Message: okay, I see we have a rule breaker should I run or tame ?"

That could definitely work on the right woman (ps when the Christmas name happening? )

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

How about some Mathematics, you plus me, minus clothes, divide the legs, multiply the orgasms.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Are you an angel who fell from heaven, because you seem to have seriously mashed up knees, should I call an ambulance?

Have you just given away your best line, Dangermouse? "

Humour is the best policy. It's never failed* for me yet

(*Worked)

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Show me your tits and ill show you my tattoos..

..Ya know, tit for tat

Technically two lines, but I will let you off! What if you've already seen her tits though?

Well id imagine if it was outside of fab and i already saw her tits then im way past needing to use that pick up line"

Yes but she might laugh and keep you around

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By *ensuallover1000Man  over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

‘Madam, I yearn to be between thy luscious thighs. Pray, grant me my earnest wish?’

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"How about some Mathematics, you plus me, minus clothes, divide the legs, multiply the orgasms. "

It's a 10 from Craig!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Are you an angel who fell from heaven, because you seem to have seriously mashed up knees, should I call an ambulance?

Have you just given away your best line, Dangermouse?

Humour is the best policy. It's never failed* for me yet

(*Worked)"

I'm sure you have many more in your arsenal

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"‘Madam, I yearn to be between thy luscious thighs. Pray, grant me my earnest wish?’ "

Prithee, dost thou lick with forked tongue?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would tell you mine but I don't want people to steal it - it gets me a fair few replies

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hey fancy pizza and a fuck

No!

Who doesnt like pizza? Weirdo

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By *riar BelisseWoman  over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Hey gorgeous let's fuck

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By *uriousscouserWoman  over a year ago

Wirral

He sent me a photo of a duck and apologised for the unsolicited duck pic, but blamed autocorrect.

Best first message I've had!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"He sent me a photo of a duck and apologised for the unsolicited duck pic, but blamed autocorrect.

Best first message I've had!"

Im so stealing that move and i am not even apologising

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I would tell you mine but I don't want people to steal it - it gets me a fair few replies "

But...but...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

“ Hey handsome “

Hahah standard boring opening line

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I would tell you mine but I don't want people to steal it - it gets me a fair few replies

But...but... "

Sorry! I'll PM you it if you want ha

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

1 ________

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would you be interested in my jaffa cakes for blowjobs exchange scheme?

Ooh controversial on Fab! Personally I am a Jaffa cake fan but don't let Kinky Biscuit Dunker see this."

Chocolate and Orange seems wrong to me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can I sit on your face?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I would tell you mine but I don't want people to steal it - it gets me a fair few replies

But...but...

Sorry! I'll PM you it if you want ha "

I'm curious now! Yes please

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"“ Hey handsome “

Hahah standard boring opening line "

I bet it works for you though!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"1 ________ "

Is that all I get?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Can I sit on your face?"

I would never be so bold (does it work??)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When we meet you won't get a word in edgeways, so if you can not reply to this we can start as we mean to go on

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"He sent me a photo of a duck and apologised for the unsolicited duck pic, but blamed autocorrect.

Best first message I've had!

Im so stealing that move and i am not even apologising "

I had that too, thought it was lame myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"He sent me a photo of a duck and apologised for the unsolicited duck pic, but blamed autocorrect.

Best first message I've had!

Im so stealing that move and i am not even apologising

I had that too, thought it was lame myself "

There was a Twitter thread by all the world museums once where they sent each other unsolicited DUCK pics. It was genius.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I would tell you mine but I don't want people to steal it - it gets me a fair few replies

But...but...

Sorry! I'll PM you it if you want ha

I'm curious now! Yes please "

I can't... I'm outside your age range

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"There was a Twitter thread by all the world museums once where they sent each other unsolicited DUCK pics. It was genius. "

That would have been funny

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive. "

I recall sending to someone Venus of Urbino painting when they asked for nudes..

One I'm most proud of I think

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive.

I recall sending to someone Venus of Urbino painting when they asked for nudes..

One I'm most proud of I think "

Outstanding response. Love it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Best opening line - I'm going to make you trust me enough to take every part of you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I shit on your face?"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive.

I recall sending to someone Venus of Urbino painting when they asked for nudes..

One I'm most proud of I think "

I usually send a photo of nude lipsticks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive.

I recall sending to someone Venus of Urbino painting when they asked for nudes..

One I'm most proud of I think

I usually send a photo of nude lipsticks "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been known to send the occasional “wanna see my big cock?” But not the picture they imagine they’d receive.

I recall sending to someone Venus of Urbino painting when they asked for nudes..

One I'm most proud of I think

Outstanding response. Love it. "

Thanks. I have bright moments

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

From a guy

'I'd take my socks off for you'

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By *avid4olderMan  over a year ago

North Coast

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

These are genius ! Keep em coming!

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By *rMojoRisinMan  over a year ago

Sheffield

We’re in our 50’s what’s to be embarrassed about, I want to fuck with you and I think it’s mutual.

(It was and we did.)

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast

Would you like me to park that for you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've just sent a first message. ..... I'll let you know if he messages back. Otherwise that can go in the never try this line category

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We’re in our 50’s what’s to be embarrassed about, I want to fuck with you and I think it’s mutual.

(It was and we did.) "

Way to go! Yay on the 50s fucking and also loving the name change

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would you like me to park that for you? "

I..I've had a couple of drinks and this is going over my head

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I've just sent a first message. ..... I'll let you know if he messages back. Otherwise that can go in the never try this line category "

ooh yes - let me know!!

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By *uriousscouserWoman  over a year ago

Wirral


"He sent me a photo of a duck and apologised for the unsolicited duck pic, but blamed autocorrect.

Best first message I've had!

Im so stealing that move and i am not even apologising

I had that too, thought it was lame myself "

I loved it, appealed to my sense of humour and ended very happily for us both!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I shit on your face? "

Ohhh that's your ideal first message?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I sit on your face?"

We have a winner…

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I shit on your face?

Ohhh that's your ideal first message? "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Welcoming any more entrants!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Do you have a TV in your bedroom?

Would you like one?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Do you have a TV in your bedroom?

Would you like one?

"

Snorted at this

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By *ittleRed18Woman  over a year ago

Aberdeen

Oh that's a nice beard, can I touch it... with my vagina?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

_____ 2

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By *ittleRed18Woman  over a year ago

Aberdeen


"Subject: Do NOT read the next line

Message: okay, I see we have a rule breaker should I run or tame ?"

Oh Hovis I think this would work on me...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can I ask about your guttering as I really want to drain your pipe.

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North

FAF?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"FAF? "

Been waiting for that...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was feeling a bit off today, and then you turned me on…

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I was feeling a bit off today, and then you turned me on…"

Cheesy! Does it work?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I was feeling a bit off today, and then you turned me on…

Cheesy! Does it work? "

Answer: nope

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