FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Nuisance calls. How I deal with some of them.
Nuisance calls. How I deal with some of them.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm sure most peeps get them.
Just had a call about an accident I was supposed to have had.
I asked him to hold for a bit which he did for quite a few seconds.
When I picked phone up I asked him if I could ask him a question which he politely said yes.
I then started to try to sell him and his colleagues the fictional apples out the back of my van. Went on for about 30 seconds. This call was 1 min 43 seconds.
He hung up.
A challenge if you get a call. Waste their time as much as possible. Yes I know they are doing their job too. But it is fun. |
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Its a tricky one, I feel sorry for them sometimes and don't want to be rude, other times all I want to do is play along...
I have had some interesting conversations about the Pirates of the Caribbean with a few of them though  |
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The guys from India trying to tell me my WiFi is going to be cut off, they’re my target. Managed to keep one on for around 5 minutes and asked him if he had a mother or father, eventually calling him a bastard.
I feel sorry for the ones who are calling about some accident I’ve never had, they’re just trying to earn a living it’s their bosses I have the issue with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends on my mood.
*huge sigh* - No thanks. *puts the phone down*
Can you please remove my number from the system/list/whatever the fuck it is and not contact me again.
Let me just pass you over to the manager/sergeant. (they quickly put the phone down)
Sorry, I'm driving. (they're not supposed to talk to you whilst you're in charge of a vehicle even if it's hands free. Well, that's what multiple official people have said when I've been driving). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The guys from India trying to tell me my WiFi is going to be cut off, they’re my target. Managed to keep one on for around 5 minutes and asked him if he had a mother or father, eventually calling him a bastard.
I feel sorry for the ones who are calling about some accident I’ve never had, they’re just trying to earn a living it’s their bosses I have the issue with. "
Hubby had one of these this morning, 7.30 ish this morning. He played along for a while then told her he used the internet for hacking. She called him a mother fucker for wasting her time and hung up  |
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"I just say no thanks and put the phone down.
...
Just people trying to earn a living.
"
Not sure that always applies. Often its nasty criminals trying to scam you so that they can make loads of money out of those that can least afford it.
They deserve all they get IMO. |
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Last time it happened, I sincerely apologised for my unpaid bill, it must have been an error at my bank, but if he held the line a moment, I'd get my debit card. I kept him hanging on the phone for nearly an hour. When I eventually went back over to the phone, to my astonishment, he was still on the line. So I told him that I'd searched everywhere and couldn't find my card, but I would go to my bank and resolve this. Can you just remind me of the details of your company please? Then he hung up, after paying for about an hours phone call. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I am not doing anything wasted they time
If they in the phone to me they aren’t scamming anyone
After about hafe a hour though the penny drops and they normally hang up |
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"Depends on my mood.
*huge sigh* - No thanks. *puts the phone down*
Can you please remove my number from the system/list/whatever the fuck it is and not contact me again.
Let me just pass you over to the manager/sergeant. (they quickly put the phone down)
Sorry, I'm driving. (they're not supposed to talk to you whilst you're in charge of a vehicle even if it's hands free. Well, that's what multiple official people have said when I've been driving). "
Ohh I like the Sergeant one |
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Funnily enough, I never get to speak to them as mostly what I have received has been an automated message playing. I now answer unknown numbers but do not say anything until they do, most unknown calls disconnect. Any time I called back when I had missed calls there was a beeping sound which disconnects which tells me that it is not a real number.
I am not sure I quite understand the purpose of those robot calls and how they actually work for the companies that use them... |
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"I'm sure most peeps get them.
Just had a call about an accident I was supposed to have had.
I asked him to hold for a bit which he did for quite a few seconds.
When I picked phone up I asked him if I could ask him a question which he politely said yes.
I then started to try to sell him and his colleagues the fictional apples out the back of my van. Went on for about 30 seconds. This call was 1 min 43 seconds.
He hung up.
A challenge if you get a call. Waste their time as much as possible. Yes I know they are doing their job too. But it is fun. "
I come up with some of the best stories …. I was hit by an ice cream van that was driven by a clown . I’ve also been hit by a wizard from hog warts on his broom . But I didn’t want to claim as he fell off and broke his broom  
They love calling me from call centres  |
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"The guys from India trying to tell me my WiFi is going to be cut off, they’re my target. Managed to keep one on for around 5 minutes and asked him if he had a mother or father, eventually calling him a bastard.
I feel sorry for the ones who are calling about some accident I’ve never had, they’re just trying to earn a living it’s their bosses I have the issue with.
Hubby had one of these this morning, 7.30 ish this morning. He played along for a while then told her he used the internet for hacking. She called him a mother fucker for wasting her time and hung up "
Mine started arguing back at me
I ended up putting the hoover on and playing it down the phone till he hung up.
The good news is I’ve not had another call. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The guys from India trying to tell me my WiFi is going to be cut off, they’re my target. Managed to keep one on for around 5 minutes and asked him if he had a mother or father, eventually calling him a bastard.
I feel sorry for the ones who are calling about some accident I’ve never had, they’re just trying to earn a living it’s their bosses I have the issue with.
Hubby had one of these this morning, 7.30 ish this morning. He played along for a while then told her he used the internet for hacking. She called him a mother fucker for wasting her time and hung up
Mine started arguing back at me
I ended up putting the hoover on and playing it down the phone till he hung up.
The good news is I’ve not had another call. "
And you did a bit of housework. Win win |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It used to wind me up immensely, getting them daily.
As I’ve got older, I seem to be more tolerant and relaxed about the little things. I stop them pre-sales pitch and let them know that if I want something, I will go and get it for myself, then wish them a good day.
I’ve seen first hand how telephone sales/customer service people get treated, and it’s not nice.
Attempted scammers are just hung up on and I block any numbers I can. |
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I'm terrible with these callers. If somebody asks me about the accident I had in the last three years, I challenge them to give me any specific information at all about the incident they are referring to (which obviously they don't have). They come up with standard answers - vague statements they say they know for a fact, or that it's another department that holds the information. I don't give an inch. They can't come up with anything I accuse them of lying and keep challenging them. I certainly never confirm whether or not I've had an accident.
Some of these companies have a policy that the caller is not allowed to end the call. It has to be the recipient. They are quite rare now but I get them occasionally. I had one guy on the line for half an hour until he finally confessed I was right and they called people pretending they have information that they don't. I then proceeded to give him careers advice about how to get a job which didn't involve wilfully lying to people. Luke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The accident calls are the best.
The condom broke.
Or
Yes I had an accident, ok what was the nature of your injury.
It was a fatality I died.
Ok we are so n so and we can get you compensation.
But I died.....
Or
This is Detective how do you know this person we are investigating a murder we need to interview you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I pretend I'm an old granny, hard of hearing and say "ohhhh is that you Timmy, I haven't heard from you in years, do you want to come and visit your granny and I'll make a cake" |
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"Oh yes, if had an accident, really bad broken leg broken arm. Then go on to natter about this and that and then finally finish with my head got ripped off. "
Oh I keep the ambulance chasers going who reckon they have it on record that I've been involved in an accident that wasn't my fault, by stringing out the conversation as long as possible regarding the extent of my injuries, finally by saying that the biggest problem I am having is memory loss. And when they elaborate on that one, I drop the bombshell that the extent of my memory loss is that I can't for the life of me ever remember being involved in an accident! That's when the immortal words of Ann Robinson come to mind, "You are the weakest link...Good bye!!!" |
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Cold calling/telesales....company's sell your details and those details go around and around for different people to try contact you..even if you ask to be taken off their contact list...people who make those calls are on commission based wages or some times commission only. Company's should not be able by law to sell and buy details of people, some even are just given the local telephone book to contact people from.  |
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"Its a tricky one, I feel sorry for them sometimes and don't want to be rude, other times all I want to do is play along..."
•
Just tell them that you wear Star Wars underwear; that'll bore the knickers off them in a picosecond! |
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Can normally tell by the area code it a cold call. So asker with Medway Trading Standard Office the phone goes dead. As for the you had an accident con. Yes I did have a major crash but have to go to court,as it was my fault because I blind an have been all my life. |
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"I'm terrible with these callers. If somebody asks me about the accident I had in the last three years, I challenge them to give me any specific information at all about the incident they are referring to (which obviously they don't have). They come up with standard answers - vague statements they say they know for a fact, or that it's another department that holds the information. I don't give an inch. They can't come up with anything I accuse them of lying and keep challenging them. I certainly never confirm whether or not I've had an accident.
Some of these companies have a policy that the caller is not allowed to end the call. It has to be the recipient. They are quite rare now but I get them occasionally. I had one guy on the line for half an hour until he finally confessed I was right and they called people pretending they have information that they don't. I then proceeded to give him careers advice about how to get a job which didn't involve wilfully lying to people. Luke "
But they’re getting paid for that half an hour. You’re wasting half an hour of your own time 
OP, you can register with TPS. If some still manage to get through, just end the call. |
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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago
Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’ |
Say:-
"Hang on a minute please, someone is at the door" (they aren't but just go with it...)
Count to 10 then open a draw. Close the draw. They are in limbo now.
Give it an hour or so. Disconnect.
They will hopefully get the mesaage for future reference.....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had this, they say they're calling about the car accident I was in and my response is "yeah and the elephant came off worse" then I hang up before they get the chance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tell them I work for a government department so if this a cold call they best have a very good reason for calling….
I tend to find they shit their pants and hang up…. "
I'm actually going into a government job in January so I could say this and it would be true x |
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Any data that you fill out online or in person if you do not tick that third party box at the bottom will be sold onto companies that then resell that information to companies that need criteria for certain things. This is why there’s slot of survey calls carried out.
TPS telephone preference system don’t take into consideration that anything prior to you signing up for the TPS only after you did this.
TPS is only valid on uk I believe so out of uk calls are still legal
If you are called by a company before 9am in the UK it’s likely the caller isn’t as this is illegal in the uk to start cold calling before hand.
It’s not illegal to cold call
Tips if you can be arsed… tell them your over 80, in private renting, crouch fruit have POA over you, take my number off your system all should cut the call from that company … but that’s just one company, they are not a collective, a hub or network.
Yes they have a living to earn and not everyone is a scammer but offering a service that may benefit your home or life ect
Example motorway protestor returns home after glueing his or her face to the m25 in protest of heating and insulation.
I call up and let them know there being offered a free service of there loft space and felt membrane to make sure there not losing heat.
M25 warrior tells me to fuck off… oh the irony
Have your fun with them, trust me it breaks up their day and they welcome it when interacting with you instead of being told to fuck off snd will laugh about it when they hang up.
Not all of us are bad and want your personal details to run off and start a village in Anoogoo where I shall reign as their leader.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had an Asian guy once telling me I had a problem with my computer. Kept him on the phone for nearly an hour waiting for my computer to boot, letting the dog out to pee, answering the front door, getting the post as it was about the fifth call of that type I had that week.
Other times I have said in a whisper so they can hear "This is another Al Quida phishing scam get at trace and mobilise the snatch squad" They hung up instantly every time.
Now I have call minder and all is very peaceful. |
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"I'm sure most peeps get them.
Just had a call about an accident I was supposed to have had.
I asked him to hold for a bit which he did for quite a few seconds.
When I picked phone up I asked him if I could ask him a question which he politely said yes.
I then started to try to sell him and his colleagues the fictional apples out the back of my van. Went on for about 30 seconds. This call was 1 min 43 seconds.
He hung up.
A challenge if you get a call. Waste their time as much as possible. Yes I know they are doing their job too. But it is fun. "
Honestly I get calls from them every other month. Last time they called me I was on the chat rooms, and I just made a bullshit story about my dog having an accident, I managed to speak to the manager haha |
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The accident call, I go through a fictional accident. I usually say I died in the accident then go quiet, till they put they phone down.
Conservatory calls, I go for an expensive design, then tell them I live in flat 43, on the top floor. |
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