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Hey what if your private parts could talk

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

What would they say

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By *ensuallover1000Man over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

‘Quit tugging me you bastard!’

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why the wait?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well hello ladies.

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By *ormorantMan over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Will you stop making me do press ups till I’m sick..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Exactly the same as my brain... Is it time for more sex yet?! When is it time for more!?!? Shouldn't you have a quick wank?? What time is he home, do you think he will want some before dinner?? I may have a problem

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By *affron40Woman over a year ago

manchester

Savvveeeee meeeeee… I’m heeeaallliinngg upppppp

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"Exactly the same as my brain... Is it time for more sex yet?! When is it time for more!?!? Shouldn't you have a quick wank?? What time is he home, do you think he will want some before dinner?? I may have a problem

"
you don't have a problem aerial trust me xx

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"Savvveeeee meeeeee… I’m heeeaallliinngg upppppp

"
snap

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“When we getting some action?” Xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This beard doesnt suit me

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"This beard doesnt suit me"

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By *asilyled1Man over a year ago

ogmore valley

Do you smell cheese too???

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

They'd just be talking bollocks

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By *ooBulMan over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

No, I couldn't. I'm tired. I've literally got headache.

"BOOBIES!"

Boing, ding,shwing!

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By *opinovMan over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Hello... is there anyone out there?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You don't wanna know

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hey , what’s with this daily beating ? What have I done wrong ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This beard doesnt suit me"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

GIMME MORE DICK.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mine would be speechless

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

Probably say a load of bollocks....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What would they say

Some cock and ball story I expect.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman over a year ago

On a mooch

Who turned all the lights out

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How come those two don't have to wear a raincoat when you have sex ?

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"How come those two don't have to wear a raincoat when you have sex ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Only the lonely.. Know the way I feel tonight ??

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By *r SensualMan over a year ago

London

“I’ve got nothing left” *Ian Beale voice* hahahahaha

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"“I’ve got nothing left” *Ian Beale voice* hahahahaha "
is he still around

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By *r SensualMan over a year ago

London

"“I’ve got nothing left” *Ian Beale voice* hahahahaha is he still around

Couldn’t tell you, haven’t watched it yonks

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By * Sophie xTV/TS over a year ago

Derby

Where are we going next

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"Where are we going next

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By *orthern StarsCouple over a year ago

Durham

Give me a rest will you

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mine would be telling men to fuck off at the moment

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"Give me a rest will you

Mrs"

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By *igmaMan over a year ago

Yorkshire

Probably just bang on about some of the nicest Airbnb’s it’s stayed in

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Underused at present...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m lonely and I’d like a friend

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You wouldn't be able to shut them up, like the other end of me!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

WILLSON!

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By *ustdaveHantsMan over a year ago

chippenham

Feeeeeeeed me Seymour

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By *ustdaveHantsMan over a year ago

chippenham

"Underused at present...

I'm sure it will come back to you soon gorgeous lady xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Underused at present...

I'm sure it will come back to you soon gorgeous lady xx"

I don't think mine answer to Seymour though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Has there been a power cut?

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By *uriousscouserWoman over a year ago

Wirral

Pu-u-u-u-ut the vi-i-i-i-ibe awa-a-a-a-ay

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"“When we getting some action?” Xx"

Tonight?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"GIMME MORE DICK.

It’s free of charge come pick some

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Jesus let me be man…

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

They would be far from impressed with me at the moment

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"GIMME MORE DICK.

That's not fair what about poor Tom and Harry?

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By *JB1954Man over a year ago

Reading

Not allowed on here would result in ban

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wax me ffs!

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By *quaman87Man over a year ago

Colchester

"Wax me ffs! "

Mine would say, petitewomen is hot and then stand up haha

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By *indergirlWoman over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Oh FFS not again, will you just leave me be

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan over a year ago

Willenhall

"Cough...cough...gasp...arghhh...STOP CHOKING ME, I'M COMING!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This beard doesnt suit me"
nearly spat my tea

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you keep jerking me around like that, I'm gonna burst into tears!

...

Told you so!

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By *rivateparts!Man over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

"Oh FFS not again, will you just leave me be

No you asked to see me

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By *usman 199 OP Man over a year ago

Stockport

"If you keep jerking me around like that, I'm gonna burst into tears!

...

Told you so!"

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