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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you take this whole topic?
Sex is pleasurable and addictive for some, and coupled with warmth and affection it plays an important role in emotional wellbeing.
But for some, having followed the forums for years, its like a sport 
Intricate details, bold claims, specific volume measurement for the money shot, even technical details more akin to my Garmin training devices.
People who are that intense on the subject....worry me
Are you a professional sex athlete? |
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I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast "
Covid made it obselete |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast "
I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast "
I'll take one please.
I'm seriously fucking serious
 |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast "
I need one of these...  |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
Covid made it obselete "
 Damn! Back to the drawing board....  |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works."
I’m strapping it on as I type....
Please assume the position of thy choosing madam.....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
Covid made it obselete "
I doubt it |
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"I'm here for the tripadvisor rating, please rate your stay out of 10.
If I get a good score i get a plaque I can nail to my bottom!"
The garden was a little unkempt but the cave diving experience was a blast and the staff are very courteous. 8/10 would visit again |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I'll take one please.
I'm seriously fucking serious
"
I’m thinking of patenting a ladies version but am struggling with where exactly to attach it. I did toy with the idea of hanging it like a Christmas tree Boerboel from the boobies but it was giving off false readings due to confusing undulations.
Rest assured though - when I do perfect it, it will be awesome |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I need one of these... "
Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes!  |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I need one of these...
Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes! "
Will I get a demo?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It’s all about the kudos on strava
I've got 2 KOM....I'm not aware how to get one here 
I’ve cleaned up the KOMs on here! "
All KOM are wind assisted |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works.
I’m strapping it on as I type....
Please assume the position of thy choosing madam..... "
I'll start on my back... been a fair while since I've been penetrated so may need easing in gently |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Nah im the bumbling hasbeen sitting in the corner eating comfort cake 
You can come to ours and bake us a cake "
firing up the bicycle.. should be there by the morning |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I need one of these...
Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes!
Will I get a demo? "
Of course - a good salesman should ALWAYS demonstrate his wares... |
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act.
I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit.
Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast
I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works.
I’m strapping it on as I type....
Please assume the position of thy choosing madam.....
I'll start on my back... been a fair while since I've been penetrated so may need easing in gently "
I’m very gentle....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Oh very. I've got an in depth spreadsheet which I fill in with potential partners' attributes, measurements, special skills, kinks etc and it does a complex equation which results in what I like to call a Fuckability Factor |
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