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It’s another farting thread

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Just farted so hard that it rumbled the whole couch, and startled my sleeping baby.

So formites, tell me

Have you ever woken someone with your farts?

And no men who will PM me, I don’t have a farting fetish and I won’t partake in yours!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Pfffftttttt!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Pfffftttttt!"

It did not sound like that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Pfffftttttt!

It did not sound like that"

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don’t recall waking anyone. I once saw my dog fart in its sleep and make itself jump though. It then looked at me like I’d done something wrong!

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By *ed VoluptaWoman  over a year ago

Wirral.

I regularly wake myself up with mine

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By *edbath 5Man  over a year ago

london

I’ve cleared a room at work

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I don’t recall waking anyone. I once saw my dog fart in its sleep and make itself jump though. It then looked at me like I’d done something wrong!"

Yeah my pug used to do this a lot

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By *oson-BlueCouple  over a year ago

North Kent


"I don’t recall waking anyone. I once saw my dog fart in its sleep and make itself jump though. It then looked at me like I’d done something wrong!"

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By *ruckingscouser69Man  over a year ago

Liverpool

I don't think I've woken anybody either, but several times I've stunk so bad I've knocked MYSELF sick

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By *ebjonnsonMan  over a year ago

Maldon

If not a fetish then a fixation?

Current girlfriend farts. A lot and very loud, I don’t like it!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I only fart unicorn dust and rainbow sprinkles

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm pretty sure I've woken myself up before

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Once sneezed on a stationary tube train and let out a massive fart at same time.

Got the attention of the carriage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I only fart unicorn dust and rainbow sprinkles "

I’d go to a doctor if I were you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"If not a fetish then a fixation?

Current girlfriend farts. A lot and very loud, I don’t like it! "

I just like making sure the men on fab know I fart

Because some men genuinely believe women don’t

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I only fart unicorn dust and rainbow sprinkles

I’d go to a doctor if I were you "

She’d just tell me she farts cupcakes and pixie dust. Fact!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just farted so hard that it rumbled the whole couch, and startled my sleeping baby.

So formites, tell me

Have you ever woken someone with your farts?

And no men who will PM me, I don’t have a farting fetish and I won’t partake in yours!!!!!"

I once farted on her thigh while she was spooning She turn over and muttered something

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By *ebjonnsonMan  over a year ago

Maldon

Remember about ten years back when you could buy an iPod online and get it engraved?

Teenage son of a friend bought his Mum one as a birthday gift- had the message: ‘Please stop farting’ engraved on the back. She was not amused!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Pfffftttttt!

It did not sound like that

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

(Thinking of starting a new thread)

Blaaaarrrrt! Is a good one

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By *ebjonnsonMan  over a year ago

Maldon


"If not a fetish then a fixation?

Current girlfriend farts. A lot and very loud, I don’t like it!

I just like making sure the men on fab know I fart

Because some men genuinely believe women don’t "

They shouldn’t!

Ok for us men as it goes back to our hunter gatherer, warrior days. Loud farting and snoring was there to ward off enemies and keep dinosaurs away from the cave, keeping our womenfolk and children safe.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"If not a fetish then a fixation?

Current girlfriend farts. A lot and very loud, I don’t like it!

I just like making sure the men on fab know I fart

Because some men genuinely believe women don’t

They shouldn’t!

Ok for us men as it goes back to our hunter gatherer, warrior days. Loud farting and snoring was there to ward off enemies and keep dinosaurs away from the cave, keeping our womenfolk and children safe. "

Yeah

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Women’s farts smell way worse than men’s

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Women’s farts smell way worse than men’s "

Yeah

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By *heslimoneMan  over a year ago

Deeside


"Just farted so hard that it rumbled the whole couch, and startled my sleeping baby.

So formites, tell me

Have you ever woken someone with your farts?

And no men who will PM me, I don’t have a farting fetish and I won’t partake in yours!!!!!"

Can i post you a bottled one?

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek

Course I have.

Child, dog, probably my parents as a child and those I've shared a bed with, including myself.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek


"If not a fetish then a fixation?

Current girlfriend farts. A lot and very loud, I don’t like it!

I just like making sure the men on fab know I fart

Because some men genuinely believe women don’t

They shouldn’t!

Ok for us men as it goes back to our hunter gatherer, warrior days. Loud farting and snoring was there to ward off enemies and keep dinosaurs away from the cave, keeping our womenfolk and children safe. "

I need no man to protect me.

So THAT'S been the message my arse has been trying to tell me all these years.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I honestly can't fart in company....

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By *asmeenTV/TS  over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"I honestly can't fart in company.... "

Liar

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By *ensuallover1000Man  over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I never fart in front of others

However.....not so long ago I got off a train and was desperate to let rip. I checked around me - no one there so I opted to release the wind.

It was mighty! I mean REALLY mighty!

I turned around, relieved and somewhat proud of my tremendous anal announcement.....and.... saw a lady had appeared about ten feet behind me....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’ve farted and made myself throw up when hung over

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By *asmeenTV/TS  over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"I never fart in front of others

However.....not so long ago I got off a train and was desperate to let rip. I checked around me - no one there so I opted to release the wind.

It was mighty! I mean REALLY mighty!

I turned around, relieved and somewhat proud of my tremendous anal announcement.....and.... saw a lady had appeared about ten feet behind me.... "

Did you blame my tiger?

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By *asmeenTV/TS  over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"I’ve farted and made myself throw up when hung over "

That nice was it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’ve farted and made myself throw up when hung over "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I woke the other half by doing a Dutch oven

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By *ruckingscouser69Man  over a year ago

Liverpool


"Pfffftttttt!

It did not sound like that

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

(Thinking of starting a new thread)

Blaaaarrrrt! Is a good one "

Whenever is see the noise of a fart 'written down' it's always PARP!

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By * Lexi xWoman  over a year ago

stockport

I always fart. My fella doesn’t like it much but I’m not getting belly ache for anyone.

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By *onkyLemonsCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham

Don’t think either of us have ever farted so loud that we woke someone with it.....

But the Mrs did once drop her guts and the smell was so bad that our daughter (who was only about 1/2 years old at the time) genuinely started heaving and had tears in her eyes because she was going to hurl.

The Mrs is a keeper as you can tell.

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By *orbidden eastMan  over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

It’s always better out than in. I just hope there is no residue

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ve farted and made myself throw up when hung over

That nice was it "

It was a belter to be honest. I’d have been quite proud of it normally, but it turned on me

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By *adylydfordWoman  over a year ago

altinkum

I fart during sex. I used to get really embarrassed about it and could never fully relax. New partner reassures me that he doesnt care and now i relax and soak the bed too!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I fart during sex. I used to get really embarrassed about it and could never fully relax. New partner reassures me that he doesnt care and now i relax and soak the bed too! "

That’s the way to be!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I once sneezed in a queue in Argos and a loud very fart accidentally came out at the same time..2 people in front of me moved further away, 1 person behind left the queue but the person directly behind me stayed put.....it was soooo embarrassing xx

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