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Fuck me.....
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that was close. 
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Firstly glad you're ok...
Secondly can you be a bit more careful please, you need to actually enjoy the fruits of your labour.
Thirdly I need to conduct a full risk assessment before further work is carried out
Her x |
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Ouch Peach, glad you are ok.
It’s the sort of thing I do too, make use of what is available to stand on even if it’s stacking things, I really should learn some healthy & safety pc but that’s not my generation
I’ve learnt I must start wearing my glasses more than I did, my body can’t keep taking a bashing as I walk into things that have always been there |
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"Firstly glad you're ok...
Secondly can you be a bit more careful please, you need to actually enjoy the fruits of your labour.
Thirdly I need to conduct a full risk assessment before further work is carried out
Her x"
I just went weeeeeee splat.
I'm gonna stick to just glossing some more around the rest of the house today I think! |
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"Jesus, woman, use a stepladder! You're no spring chicken you know, could break a hip in a fall like that 
Mrs TMN x"
That meant effort lugging it through and I only had to move the sofa a tidgy bit.
Hip schmip |
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"Jesus, woman, use a stepladder! You're no spring chicken you know, could break a hip in a fall like that
Mrs TMN x
That meant effort lugging it through and I only had to move the sofa a tidgy bit.
Hip schmip "
Hippity hoppity schmipitty schmopitty |
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"Ouch Peach, glad you are ok.
It’s the sort of thing I do too, make use of what is available to stand on even if it’s stacking things, I really should learn some healthy & safety pc but that’s not my generation
I’ve learnt I must start wearing my glasses more than I did, my body can’t keep taking a bashing as I walk into things that have always been there "
Bruises come from nowhere the older ya get don't you find? And they last an age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Bloody hello
Oh what have i learned?
Not to perv at a hit womans pefectly sculpted ass when she is squating at the gym
I banged my finger on a weight and lil Ric was also standing to attention
Quite the drama |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Firstly glad you're ok...
Secondly can you be a bit more careful please, you need to actually enjoy the fruits of your labour.
Thirdly I need to conduct a full risk assessment before further work is carried out
Her x
I just went weeeeeee splat.
I'm gonna stick to just glossing some more around the rest of the house today I think!"
Yes good idea! We are going to need to set you a schedule for checking in on here to let us know you're ok at this rate
Her x |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?  "
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not. |
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"Bloody hello
Oh what have i learned?
Not to perv at a hit womans pefectly sculpted ass when she is squating at the gym
I banged my finger on a weight and lil Ric was also standing to attention
Quite the drama"
Mwahahaha yep, keep your eyes on what you're meant to be looking at |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?"
There’s nothing worse than a bad screw.  |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not."
Please don't try it.
Surely you must know a handyperson (not being sexiest) who can help you??? |
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"Firstly glad you're ok...
Secondly can you be a bit more careful please, you need to actually enjoy the fruits of your labour.
Thirdly I need to conduct a full risk assessment before further work is carried out
Her x
I just went weeeeeee splat.
I'm gonna stick to just glossing some more around the rest of the house today I think!
Yes good idea! We are going to need to set you a schedule for checking in on here to let us know you're ok at this rate
Her x"
At least I know I ain't gonna drown in the tin of paint, my fivehead is way too big to fit in the tin |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
There’s nothing worse than a bad screw. "
Dunno, maggots yer japseye can't be much fun? |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
Please don't try it.
Surely you must know a handyperson (not being sexiest) who can help you???"
I can ask next door.
I'm impatient when it comes to doing stuff for myself tho when I get the belly fire.
Independent to the detriment to myself.
I think it's because physically I've always battled. I was always one of the smallest, always had to find ways round things ya know |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
Please don't try it.
Surely you must know a handyperson (not being sexiest) who can help you???
I can ask next door.
I'm impatient when it comes to doing stuff for myself tho when I get the belly fire.
Independent to the detriment to myself.
I think it's because physically I've always battled. I was always one of the smallest, always had to find ways round things ya know"
I don't know you, but you're obviously a very capable lady. You must be a little more patient and A LOT MORE CAREFUL. X |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
What have I learned today?
That laughing at the visions of a pint sized Peach free falling doesn't help the pain in my shoulder blade gained from sleeping awkwardly on it.
Question is ya noodle, you have a perfectly good set of step ladders, I know I've seen them in decorating pics - what the eff and jeff were you thinking not using them?
Oh ok, confession time, I probably wouldn't have been arsed to move the sofa either |
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"Ouch Peach, glad you are ok.
It’s the sort of thing I do too, make use of what is available to stand on even if it’s stacking things, I really should learn some healthy & safety pc but that’s not my generation
I’ve learnt I must start wearing my glasses more than I did, my body can’t keep taking a bashing as I walk into things that have always been there
Bruises come from nowhere the older ya get don't you find? And they last an age."
Totally I have to on my leg currently that is so big I’d think I should know how I got it, but nope..... one week and counting, the joys of getting old |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not."
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone |
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"What have I learned today?
That laughing at the visions of a pint sized Peach free falling doesn't help the pain in my shoulder blade gained from sleeping awkwardly on it.
Question is ya noodle, you have a perfectly good set of step ladders, I know I've seen them in decorating pics - what the eff and jeff were you thinking not using them?
Oh ok, confession time, I probably wouldn't have been arsed to move the sofa either "
I didn't want to risk scuffing the ceiling with them. To be fair tho I'd rather have fallen from the back of the sofa than have the ladders go from under me. Foooooook that |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone "
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway! |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway! "
That I have no tips for except an extra person |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway!
That I have no tips for except an extra person "
I'm proper chuckling tho, it makes my house sound all grand and luxurious  it's a pokey shit hole I'm doing my best to make semi non embarrassing |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?"
What have I learnt today? Princess Peach really needs to get a man in! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ive learnt that you're probably quite interesting on the dance floor
I don't do much apart from nod my head and a few shimmy wiggles "
Clearly you should put up some curtains near a dance floor then |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway!
That I have no tips for except an extra person
I'm proper chuckling tho, it makes my house sound all grand and luxurious it's a pokey shit hole I'm doing my best to make semi non embarrassing "
You can make it your little palace.... when is the chandelier arriving |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway!
That I have no tips for except an extra person
I'm proper chuckling tho, it makes my house sound all grand and luxurious it's a pokey shit hole I'm doing my best to make semi non embarrassing
You can make it your little palace.... when is the chandelier arriving "
Delboy and Rodney are delivering it tomorrow.  |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
What have I learnt today? Princess Peach really needs to get a man in! "
No she bastard don't!
She may want one at some point, but she will never need one.
|
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"Ive learnt that you're probably quite interesting on the dance floor
I don't do much apart from nod my head and a few shimmy wiggles
Clearly you should put up some curtains near a dance floor then"
Fuck that shizzle with a cactus |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?"
Ouch!glad you’re ok Take care plan if you can  |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway!
That I have no tips for except an extra person
I'm proper chuckling tho, it makes my house sound all grand and luxurious it's a pokey shit hole I'm doing my best to make semi non embarrassing
You can make it your little palace.... when is the chandelier arriving "
I'll make one out of bog roll tubes |
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"Can we start a fundraiser to get you a step ladder and and electric screwdriver?
Pfffft, it's put me off attempting to get the massive mirror down the stairs.
I did try the other day and got stuck for a good 5 mins fighting with the cunt thinking I was gonna die at the bottom of the stairs in a pool of broken glass, but I'm a stubborn prick and was tempted to try again.
I shall not.
A suggestion if it fits sideways down the stairs when flat, wrap it in a large duvet cover and then slowly lower it down the stairs, with you behind it, works going upstairs as well.
A tip I taught myself after moving house a few times alone
Good shout.
Thing is, getting it down will serve no purpose as I need someone to help me lift the big bastard above the fireplace anyway!
That I have no tips for except an extra person
I'm proper chuckling tho, it makes my house sound all grand and luxurious it's a pokey shit hole I'm doing my best to make semi non embarrassing
You can make it your little palace.... when is the chandelier arriving
Delboy and Rodney are delivering it tomorrow. "
|
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
What have I learnt today? Princess Peach really needs to get a man in!
No she bastard don't!
She may want one at some point, but she will never need one.
"
You just need someone to catch you. Lol |
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"Did you at least get the screw in?
It’s lucky you don’t have a cat. Imagine a cat sat watching and judging like a little fluffy judge Judy "
It's not quite in. It's a prick.
I can imagine a feline giving me a right dirty look! |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
What have I learnt today? Princess Peach really needs to get a man in!
No she bastard don't!
She may want one at some point, but she will never need one.
You just need someone to catch you. Lol"
Or I could put cushions on the floor |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Omg woman be careful!
To be fair I do knobbish things like that all the time
When I moved in December I spent most of my time tying really heavy things to my bicycle with bungee cords like 9 foot metal curtain poles and Henry Hoovers and pushing them up hills 
I nearly broke my fingers with a hammer as well.
I've still got so much stuff to do it takes time you'll get there |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
What have I learnt today? Princess Peach really needs to get a man in!
No she bastard don't!
She may want one at some point, but she will never need one.
You just need someone to catch you. Lol
Or I could put cushions on the floor "
I have a blow-up bed you could borrow. |
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Aww Miss Peach, don't feel too bad, I did something similar using one of them cheapo Black & Decker Workbench jobbies as a step, snapped the top in half and ended up in a heap on the floor with cuts n scratches on my foot & leg.
My advice for you, as I know you're only ikle, next time you go more than 500mm above floor level wear a parachute |
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" Omg woman be careful!
To be fair I do knobbish things like that all the time
When I moved in December I spent most of my time tying really heavy things to my bicycle with bungee cords like 9 foot metal curtain poles and Henry Hoovers and pushing them up hills
I nearly broke my fingers with a hammer as well.
I've still got so much stuff to do it takes time you'll get there "
I still need actual curtains, carpet and the mirror up, but.... I can say for the first time in 7 years (since I moved in).... it FEELS almost like a living room |
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"Aww Miss Peach, don't feel too bad, I did something similar using one of them cheapo Black & Decker Workbench jobbies as a step, snapped the top in half and ended up in a heap on the floor with cuts n scratches on my foot & leg.
My advice for you, as I know you're only ikle, next time you go more than 500mm above floor level wear a parachute "
Yes! I totes should have attached a pillowcase to my back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ive learnt that you're probably quite interesting on the dance floor
I don't do much apart from nod my head and a few shimmy wiggles
Clearly you should put up some curtains near a dance floor then
Fuck that shizzle with a cactus "
Ya kinky bugger |
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"I'm glad your beautiful face hasn't been damaged. 
Today I have learned that dropping a spoon on your cold feet when you're making a cup of tea at stupid o clock is really bloody painful."
Oh sugar tits that's not a lesson I wanted you to learn and I bet your feet weren't impressed either. Boooooooooooooooo
Fluffy bed socks for you |
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Today I’ve learned they you can put your back out by sneezing.
As a similar age, I’m having to reign in my stupid stunts. I’m using a loft ladder instead of leaping from the bannister rail, for example. |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?"
OMG! lady you need to invest in step ladders! |
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"Today I’ve learned they you can put your back out by sneezing.
As a similar age, I’m having to reign in my stupid stunts. I’m using a loft ladder instead of leaping from the bannister rail, for example. "
Ouchies!
No more "leaping lizards" for you. |
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"that was close.
Me and my short little legs decided standing on the back of the sofa was the sufficient to screw the curtain pole batons into the walls.
One of the screws was being a cockwomble and I needed to really give it some and put all my weight behind it (I'm using a screwdriver not a drill you see)
Anywhoooooo, next thing I know my feet are level with my head and I'm free falling onto the floor face first.
Don't ask me how the fuck I did it but SOMEHOW I tilted my head just far enough to the left as my elbows hit the deck and the screwdriver missed my face by fucking millimetres.
I've learnt at not far off 43 years old I no longer bounce, but I also learnt...
Wear grippy footwear.
I still have cat like reflexes.
I'm fucking 'ard
What have you learnt today?
OMG! lady you need to invest in step ladders! "
I've got next doors, in all honesty I reckon they'd have flown out from underneath me even if I used them |
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"Today I’ve learned they you can put your back out by sneezing.
As a similar age, I’m having to reign in my stupid stunts. I’m using a loft ladder instead of leaping from the bannister rail, for example.
Ouchies!
No more "leaping lizards" for you."
Yeah, the final pull-up into the loft is a lot more challenging than it used to be! |
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"Today I’ve learned they you can put your back out by sneezing.
As a similar age, I’m having to reign in my stupid stunts. I’m using a loft ladder instead of leaping from the bannister rail, for example.
Ouchies!
No more "leaping lizards" for you.
Yeah, the final pull-up into the loft is a lot more challenging than it used to be!"
You know what, I reckon I'd struggle these days getting myself out of a swimming pool! |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Right, I've sat on my arse all day and I'm about to have a flat battery.
I'll fetch the paint out. "
Now im imagining the Mr Bean sketch where he uses a stick of dinamite in a tin of paint to paint the room. |
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"Right, I've sat on my arse all day and I'm about to have a flat battery.
I'll fetch the paint out.
Now im imagining the Mr Bean sketch where he uses a stick of dinamite in a tin of paint to paint the room. "
Now im imagining the Mythbusters episode where they tried to re-create the Mr Bean sketch |
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"Not going to lie princess I laughed at the image. A cockwomble of a screw indeed.
I have not learnt much today to be honest. But the day isn’t over. "
Seriously, it was funny!
My big toe must have taken a knock as it's gone stiff |
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By *lfacatMan
over a year ago
Kendal |
Today I have learnt that sofa make a piss poor substitutes for ladder!
And that other people falling off a sofa is funnier than me falling down the stairs..!
Hope your aches & pains are only from laughing!
X |
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"Today I have learnt that sofa make a piss poor substitutes for ladder!
And that other people falling off a sofa is funnier than me falling down the stairs..!
Hope your aches & pains are only from laughing!
X"
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Hope you're OK you plonker! 