FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > There’s nice ... and then there’s too nice
There’s nice ... and then there’s too nice
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I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off 
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess 
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad  .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ? "
Yes i believe some guys can be too nice. I feel like I should mother them rather than fuck them..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Interesting question OP. I'll watch the answers with interest.
But I guess it's best to be ourselves and not pretend to be something else. The genuine article is always best. |
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"I disagree. I like nice guys. "
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off   |
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
Yes i believe some guys can be too nice. I feel like I should mother them rather than fuck them..
"
I don’t need mothering ,
Pretty independent chap here  |
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"I like nice guys but if they're too nice I often feel like I want to give them a shake and tell them to grow a pair! "
I do have a pair of cahonas
I think their just a little sweet for anyone to crave /desire |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
Yes i believe some guys can be too nice. I feel like I should mother them rather than fuck them..
I don’t need mothering ,
Pretty independent chap here "
Just my opinion to your thread Sir  |
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This is a general observation not a personal one.
If I describe someone as too nice it's either a kind way of saying I'm not interested in them sexually or romantically or it's because they are so overly nice it comes across as creepy and desperate.
There isn't a friend zone however men and wen can be friends, that is not second best to having sex with each other, friends are good things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like nice guys but if they're too nice I often feel like I want to give them a shake and tell them to grow a pair! "
Oh yes this also! There’s a few like that for sure! |
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
Yes i believe some guys can be too nice. I feel like I should mother them rather than fuck them..
I don’t need mothering ,
Pretty independent chap here
Just my opinion to your thread Sir "
I know I was just replying ma’am  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is a general observation not a personal one.
If I describe someone as too nice it's either a kind way of saying I'm not interested in them sexually or romantically or it's because they are so overly nice it comes across as creepy and desperate.
There isn't a friend zone however men and wen can be friends, that is not second best to having sex with each other, friends are good things. "
Well said..Exactly this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I disagree. I like nice guys.
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off "
Welcome to paradise |
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Nothing wrong with a nice guy at all, it’s the twunts that need to keep on walking.
A nice guy can be a bit wet sometimes, to nice, sickly nice or fake nice and that I find off putting and in my mind say ‘grow a pair’ or no one is that nice all the time.
As for the friend zone, male friends end up there because we get on but there is just no sexual attraction. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
Yes i believe some guys can be too nice. I feel like I should mother them rather than fuck them..
"
I hate that. I come across as nice - perhaps too nice - and have had some girlfriends do the want to 'look after you' thing. Eventually they come to find out I'm not as nice as I first appeared.
Still waters and all that... |
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I hope I come across as nice, if that means that some ladies wouldn’t want to be wicked with me, then so be it.
Unless I’m deluded and I’m really a nasty piece of work who doesn’t like puppies, but I don’t think that’s me. |
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"This is a general observation not a personal one.
If I describe someone as too nice it's either a kind way of saying I'm not interested in them sexually or romantically or it's because they are so overly nice it comes across as creepy and desperate.
There isn't a friend zone however men and wen can be friends, that is not second best to having sex with each other, friends are good things.
Well said..Exactly this "
Agreed. And using it as an angle for contacts moves it into the creepy zone... |
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"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol. "
I think I may try a little too hard 
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know 
I may just not have got good game |
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"I disagree. I like nice guys.
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off
Welcome to paradise "
Where’s paradise for you ?
Asking for a friend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I disagree. I like nice guys.
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off
Welcome to paradise
Where’s paradise for you ?
Asking for a friend "
Nowhere near you I’m afraid  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I disagree. I like nice guys.
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off
Welcome to paradise
Where’s paradise for you ?
Asking for a friend
Nowhere near you I’m afraid "
Or your friend! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol.
I think I may try a little too hard
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know
I may just not have got good game "
There is no such thing as the perfect gentleman because we all like different things about men. For me I love someone I can talk to and laugh with and find them attractive by their personality. Too nice can be creepy(depending on what they say) and too pushy is an off put for me personally xx |
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"This is a general observation not a personal one.
If I describe someone as too nice it's either a kind way of saying I'm not interested in them sexually or romantically or it's because they are so overly nice it comes across as creepy and desperate.
There isn't a friend zone however men and wen can be friends, that is not second best to having sex with each other, friends are good things. "
This, although I will add that I often feel that people who are sickeningly nice all the time just seem fake to me - this to me spells duplicity, which is a quality I don't much care for. |
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"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol.
I think I may try a little too hard
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know
I may just not have got good game There is no such thing as the perfect gentleman because we all like different things about men. For me I love someone I can talk to and laugh with and find them attractive by their personality. Too nice can be creepy(depending on what they say) and too pushy is an off put for me personally xx"
I may just need to grab the bull by the horn and kick myself into better banter and stop trying to please all the time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol.
I think I may try a little too hard
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know
I may just not have got good game There is no such thing as the perfect gentleman because we all like different things about men. For me I love someone I can talk to and laugh with and find them attractive by their personality. Too nice can be creepy(depending on what they say) and too pushy is an off put for me personally xx
I may just need to grab the bull by the horn and kick myself into better banter and stop trying to please all the time "
nice is good. Too nice is scary pmsl. Only joking. Be yourself. That's what matters most |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often."
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want (sorry it had to be said lol).
I think the reason women treat me like crap sometimes is that they see me as nice but then the attraction isn't there, and they don't know why, so they kinda end up ghosting me... not deliberately but more out of confusion as to why I'm not doing it for them.
Even had one woman I was dating me message me to apologise for disappearing only to immediately ghost me again.
I've learned a few things and do better now but occasionally I'll do something weak and it's over.
If you want advice, ask an Alpha male who's not too much of a jerk, you'll find them under a pile of women covered in the sweet scent of pussy |
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"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol.
I think I may try a little too hard
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know
I may just not have got good game "
If you are a perfect gentleman you will come across as one. There is no game.
Most women can tell when a man is trying too hard to appear to be something. That's another reason they describe men as too nice.
There are men who want all women to see them as a great guy that they want to have sex with. Personable, sexy, a gentleman etc etc. Most men aren't 007, they're just men and women understand that. |
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"I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often.
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want (sorry it had to be said lol).
I think the reason women treat me like crap sometimes is that they see me as nice but then the attraction isn't there, and they don't know why, so they kinda end up ghosting me... not deliberately but more out of confusion as to why I'm not doing it for them.
Even had one woman I was dating me message me to apologise for disappearing only to immediately ghost me again.
I've learned a few things and do better now but occasionally I'll do something weak and it's over.
If you want advice, ask an Alpha male who's not too much of a jerk, you'll find them under a pile of women covered in the sweet scent of pussy "
Do you really believe this? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often.
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want (sorry it had to be said lol).
I think the reason women treat me like crap sometimes is that they see me as nice but then the attraction isn't there, and they don't know why, so they kinda end up ghosting me... not deliberately but more out of confusion as to why I'm not doing it for them.
Even had one woman I was dating me message me to apologise for disappearing only to immediately ghost me again.
I've learned a few things and do better now but occasionally I'll do something weak and it's over.
If you want advice, ask an Alpha male who's not too much of a jerk, you'll find them under a pile of women covered in the sweet scent of pussy "
Anyone with alpha male on their profile is an immediate no thanks from me so that’s not strictly true! |
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"I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often.
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want (sorry it had to be said lol).
I think the reason women treat me like crap sometimes is that they see me as nice but then the attraction isn't there, and they don't know why, so they kinda end up ghosting me... not deliberately but more out of confusion as to why I'm not doing it for them.
Even had one woman I was dating me message me to apologise for disappearing only to immediately ghost me again.
I've learned a few things and do better now but occasionally I'll do something weak and it's over.
If you want advice, ask an Alpha male who's not too much of a jerk, you'll find them under a pile of women covered in the sweet scent of pussy
Anyone with alpha male on their profile is an immediate no thanks from me so that’s not strictly true!"
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
The thing is, define "nice"?
It's such a subjective word - if by "nice" you mean being genuine, respectful, thoughtful, and other similar qualities (all of which most would consider "nice"), then surely isn't niceness something we should all strive for (regardless of gender) and it shouldn't necessarily preclude attraction and more.
I think "too nice" is often used as an excuse on both sides of the equation because it's an easy thing to either say to someone without hurting feelings, or blame and still feel good about yourself.
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"I think it depends on the way a guy demonstrates his niceness. I was a nice boy when I was pre-teens. But being nice became less important than other qualities as I grew up. Being compassionate and kind are more important to me now than being nice. Being ruthless at times is more important to me now than being nice. Achieving things, making a difference to the world around me and learning to act with more integrity are all more important to me than being nice now.
That said being nice is much better than me behaving in a self-centred, selfish way deliberately taking advantage of others to satisfy my own needs, although In all honesty I do that too at times, but hopefully less and less often.
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want (sorry it had to be said lol).
I think the reason women treat me like crap sometimes is that they see me as nice but then the attraction isn't there, and they don't know why, so they kinda end up ghosting me... not deliberately but more out of confusion as to why I'm not doing it for them.
Even had one woman I was dating me message me to apologise for disappearing only to immediately ghost me again.
I've learned a few things and do better now but occasionally I'll do something weak and it's over.
If you want advice, ask an Alpha male who's not too much of a jerk, you'll find them under a pile of women covered in the sweet scent of pussy "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone with alpha male on their profile is an immediate no thanks from me so that’s not strictly true!"
Yeah of course, maybe that was the wrong term to use because people have different ideas about what it means.
I mean someone who's mature, responsible, and who's happy with his own relationships with women rather than pretending to know it all.
FYI, I don't consider myself an alpha, only I've got a lot of bad advice in the past on this topic and it tended to be older, wiser, men now settled down with families that helped. They weren't speaking out of ego or trying to prove something. |
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"Do you really believe this?
With reference to my most recent post, which bit?"
That in your experience women are awful at making the distinction between genuine niceness and weakness and knowing what they want |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I have a fab friend who is just far too nice to even think of anything sexual about him. He tries far too hard to be nice and I see him as just a friend. You cant win. You're either too nice to us or too cocky with us lol.
I think I may try a little too hard
I want to come across as the perfect gentleman I don’t know
I may just not have got good game
If you are a perfect gentleman you will come across as one. There is no game.
Most women can tell when a man is trying too hard to appear to be something. That's another reason they describe men as too nice.
There are men who want all women to see them as a great guy that they want to have sex with. Personable, sexy, a gentleman etc etc. Most men aren't 007, they're just men and women understand that. "
This sums it up perfectly for me - too many on here try to be appealing to all when the truth is most probably 99% of the time you won't be.
And off the back of that you can't make yourself "be" nice....you "are" nice in the eye of the beholder |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you really believe this?
With reference to my most recent post, which bit?
That in your experience women are awful at making the distinction between genuine niceness and weakness and knowing what they want"
The way you've put it sounds worse lol
"Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want"
In terms of giving advice, yes, many women have encouraged my niceness when really what I needed to do was grow up and become stronger.
It had been a tradition in many societies for adolescent boys to be taken away from their, possibly over-protective, mothers for a period and be taught how to be a man. We don't do that much anymore. If the problem of being too nice is essentially boys not having been taught how to act as men, then asking women isn't going to be the best way forward and is actually a symptom of the problem... you need to ask men.
As for the bit about knowing what you want, all I can say is that I often don't fully understand why I find one woman attractive and not another (personality wise). You may know intuitively, and perhaps with experience you gain a better understanding?
It is difficult for me to understand why some women I've dated seemed really kind in person and then seemingly felt it was suddenly ok to be very disrespectful. The explanation that I was unwittingly doing something wrong, which they didn't know how to respond to, is the best and most generous one I've come up with so far.
Hopefully that's clearer, because I think what I was trying to convey is much less controversial than how it may have sounded.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is no such thing as too nice... Plus, I am attracted to faces, mannerisms and good attitudes, not liking those is the only thing that would make me not want to rip a guys clothes off... That sounds weird but I am too tired to explain any more than that lol |
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"I think most ladies prefer nice guys to twats.
Could it be that you have no game?
No game????"
I think he’s referring to me being a bit of a wet lettuce and not being able to approach or chat woman up
What he doesn’t know is that I’m an incredible dancer which starts a conversation that lasts for hours |
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"I think most ladies prefer nice guys to twats.
Could it be that you have no game?
No game????
I think he’s referring to me being a bit of a wet lettuce and not being able to approach or chat woman up
What he doesn’t know is that I’m an incredible dancer which starts a conversation that lasts for hours "
I see. Good moves always work |
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"Do you really believe this?
With reference to my most recent post, which bit?
That in your experience women are awful at making the distinction between genuine niceness and weakness and knowing what they want
The way you've put it sounds worse lol
Being nice isn't attractive if you're doing it because you're weak. In my experience women are pretty awful at making this distinction and knowing what they want"
I thought I summed it up pretty succinctly
"In terms of giving advice, yes, many women have encouraged my niceness when really what I needed to do was grow up and become stronger."
I'm not sure what you mean here. Women have encouraged you to be nice but you needed something different. That just means you weren't right for each other I suppose
"It had been a tradition in many societies for adolescent boys to be taken away from their, possibly over-protective, mothers for a period and be taught how to be a man. We don't do that much anymore. If the problem of being too nice is essentially boys not having been taught how to act as men, then asking women isn't going to be the best way forward and is actually a symptom of the problem... you need to ask men."
I disagree that being too nice is a problem and that niceness is not a masculine quality. Being too nice has nothing to do with not being taught to be men. Men don't complain that their male friends find them too nice, only that women they want to have sex with do, I think that the problem is that "some" men can't accept that the women they are friend with don't want to have sex with them.
"As for the bit about knowing what you want, all I can say is that I often don't fully understand why I find one woman attractive and not another (personality wise). You may know intuitively, and perhaps with experience you gain a better understanding?
It is difficult for me to understand why some women I've dated seemed really kind in person and then seemingly felt it was suddenly ok to be very disrespectful. The explanation that I was unwittingly doing something wrong, which they didn't know how to respond to, is the best and most generous one I've come up with so far."
They suddenly felt the need to be disrespectful either because they aren't very nice or they couldn't think of another way to end things with you
"Hopefully that's clearer, because I think what I was trying to convey is much less controversial than how it may have sounded.
"
It's a bit clearer but controversy isn't always a bad thing, its good to discuss stuff, it helps people understand each other |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ? "
You sound perfect. I love nice men, but you can be kind, be a gentleman, make me laugh etc, as long as you are filthy and dominant in the bedroom!
‘A bit of a lad’ is a turn off for me
Hippy |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol "
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless. |
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By *omvampmMan
over a year ago
gillingham |
You are who you are don't change it or try be someone else we all like different people for different reasons and when connection is genuine be it sexually or emotionally or as a friend it's all good life's to short to worry as long as yer not an asshole of first degree I'd stick with being you mate
I'm no expert mind just voicing an opinion |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You wouldn’t - no need to fall into that ‘lad’ description as there’s stigma attached to it, same with rugby players.
It came to the point I wouldn’t tell people I played rugby because painted with the same brush - same way I sound painful over text, in person it’s a different story....
You are who you are mate, someone out there appreciates it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Being true isn't the same as being relevant.
The opposite of a wrong thing is often another wrong thing in a different direction.
Your right to make a choice is not an explanation of why you made that choice and so can't serve as a guide to others.
Maturation is a process that requires effort and guidance, you can still be you, just a more developed version of you.
Saying everyone's preferences are different is true, it's also true that some people are rejected a lot more than others, it's true again that there are many ways in which people's preferences are the same. Am I saying anything helpful?
If 10 men and 10 women live in an isolated village, then after a year, 10 women may have chosen to have a child with the same man. The 10 men can NOT have chosen to all have a child with the same woman. This is biology. This creates competition. "You are fine how you are", "There is nothing wrong with being nice", "Keep trying you'll meet someone one day" are not solutions to the problems men face.
When I say Alpha, I mean Barrack Obama, you hear Donald Trump.
How nice you are isn't important, why you are being nice might be. Think less about how nice you are and more about what other qualities you want to possess... as in the post I originally quoted.
I might be wrong.
You decide.
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ? "
I still fuck them but wish they would be more assertive . I love being pushed against the wall, kissed hard and my clothes ripped off. Sometimes it is me that has to do this to them.
|
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
I still fuck them but wish they would be more assertive . I love being pushed against the wall, kissed hard and my clothes ripped off. Sometimes it is me that has to do this to them.
"
I can do the assertive thing
Just getting I just need the chance
I like pushing up against a wall and kissing  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I do have a soft spot for good old fashioned men who know how to treat a lady.
Give me nice anyday
I’m just out of your age bracket and we live miles apart I’m gutted "
Life is so unfair!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless."
That's one hell of a patronising post you've attached to mine, and what makes you think I'm constantly changing or trying to be something im not???
I'm simply polite with girls. Not however with patronising fucking idiots
|
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless.
That's one hell of a patronising post you've attached to mine, and what makes you think I'm constantly changing or trying to be something im not???
I'm simply polite with girls. Not however with patronising fucking idiots
"
I think you missed the bit where I said "not saying you do necessarily" so if you've taken my post as a comment on you personally then not my intent in the slightest, and I apologise unreservedly if you have taken it that way.
But I stand by the basis of what I said in that a lot of guys *do* try to be something to everyone.
Again apologies if I've caused offence
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I'm not a fan of the self-proclaimed nice guy, as so often I find it a little manipulative and toxic. If you're just being nice to me because you think it will get you laid; if you think I somehow should owe you attention because you're nice to me; if you think that any man I'm with is a knob because he's not as nice as you... these aren't very nice traits.
Not suggesting that's you by the way OP (we've never interacted!), just recurring scenarios that keep playing out with other men who describe themselves to me as a nice guy.
I'm not looking for a nice guy. I'm not interested in a bad boy, and frankly the label of alpha male makes me snort-laugh. I'm always interested in a good man though. |
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ? "
My experience is many ladies like compassionate empathic men who treat them as both individuals and equals
Many are not so keen on sycophantic chameleons yes men
Both can be defined as nice
The majority of ladies iv had the pleasure of spending quality time have expressed their total disdain for the insipid bland and inarticulate use of the meh word "nice"
However I think it fair to suggest if a lady desires the fire in your eyes and pants being what you call nice wont put them off  |
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"I disagree. I like nice guys.
Oh really ... well your profile says you’re currently in paradise ...
I’m currently working in paradise at the moment .. and haven’t seen you around .
But I’d love to take you out for a drink and a laugh when corona has packed up and tucked off
Welcome to paradise
Where’s paradise for you ?
Asking for a friend
Nowhere near you I’m afraid
Or your friend!"
Seems its about 90 odd miles from me! |
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"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless.
That's one hell of a patronising post you've attached to mine, and what makes you think I'm constantly changing or trying to be something im not???
I'm simply polite with girls. Not however with patronising fucking idiots
"
This is a forum: he made a general observation that you have misread, and misapplied to yourself. Your reasons for that are your own, but that does not make your insult justified, it just proves his point. |
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A decent man is not a wrong choice for an NSA partner or longer term partner - this type of man is my preference. That is your 'edge' and it makes you distinctive and it's noticeable.
It doesn't make you a pushover. We've moved on from the darker ages where only the roughest, unprincipled and potentially abusive may have dominated some things and people. We've learned.
Don't yearn to be someone that you are not, nor spend time with people who don't value who you are. If people do that, they may miss others who ready to see and accept them as they are. It's better to be single and purely yourself than to do otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Op, from seeing the way you're switching the ladies comments into cheeky chat up lines and clearly messaging them.
I dunno if the "nice guy finishes last" hat fits.
Plus you got a few veris already.
I suspect this thread is a clever ruse, but then again I'm far to dumb to work that out all by myself...
I'm probably one of those "mean guys" haha
In all seriousness, be your self, be Confident in who you are, confidence sells yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless.
That's one hell of a patronising post you've attached to mine, and what makes you think I'm constantly changing or trying to be something im not???
I'm simply polite with girls. Not however with patronising fucking idiots
This is a forum: he made a general observation that you have misread, and misapplied to yourself. Your reasons for that are your own, but that does not make your insult justified, it just proves his point. "
Errrr it was attached to my post therefore it insinuates its regarding me doesn't it?
I do not as he spoke of change my persona to try and fit in OR try to be something I'm not.
2 years I've been on fab and I defy anyone friend or not to say I'm not one of the most genuine guys they've ever met or spoken too.
It is a forum and I believe in his freedom to speak his mind as I also have the fredom to defend my character but do it on his own post.
"And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here" was written directly under my post, what part of this statement have I misconstrued btw?
It reads as if it's very much to do with me.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ? "
There is no thing as being too nice. Women don't put men in ths friend zone, men put themselves in the friend zone by the little things they say and do 'wrong'. Subconsciously a woman will 'make up her mind' if she's into you or not.
There's a lot of info out there from sp called coaches that work. I've tried it all out and have probably fucked more women from POF and bumble theb here on fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Being nice is often situational. Take a wedding for example. An interview. A first date. On holiday. Your doctor, dentist surgeon etc.
Folk with accomplishment, more time, experience. More likely to be or appear nice. Your manager, your elders.
Under stress the niceness starts to slip. Some folk want to see how you are under stress, what they can expect, what's left to work with. Locating the breaking point.
So op that's probably what you might have experienced. Occasionally known as a shit test. |
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"I am this I think in texts but only to show my keenness. In real life I'm just a regular guy.
I like other guys no I'm just one in a sea of a 1000 guys and I guess I over compensate in my efforts to not come across as an idiot... doesn't work though lol
And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here - not saying you do necessarily, but a lot seem to want to appeal to all and try too hard to fit themselves to what they "think" people are looking for, rather than realising, and accepting, that they'll probably only appeal to about 1% of people and just being themselves.
By constantly changing to try to be something they're not they never actually find the 1% that would have found them appealing regardless.
That's one hell of a patronising post you've attached to mine, and what makes you think I'm constantly changing or trying to be something im not???
I'm simply polite with girls. Not however with patronising fucking idiots
This is a forum: he made a general observation that you have misread, and misapplied to yourself. Your reasons for that are your own, but that does not make your insult justified, it just proves his point. "
" Errrr it was attached to my post therefore it insinuates its regarding me doesn't it? "
It says that your comments (but maybe not you) created an appropriate point to say it
"I do not as he spoke of change my persona to to fit in OR try to be something I'm not.
2 years I've been on fab and I defy anyone friend or not to say I'm not one of the most genuine guys they've ever met or spoken too."
By genuine I *assume* you mean consistant, unchanging, he says very clearly "not saying you do necessarily"
"It is a forum and I believe in his freedom to speak his mind as I also have the fredom to defend my character but do it on his own post.
"And this is where I think a lot of guys fail on here" was written directly under my post, what part of this statement have I misconstrued btw?
It reads as if it's very much to do with me."
Again - "not saying you do necessarily" in his opening sentence seems pretty clear to me. Of course you have a right to defend yourself, however a "nice" guy who leaps to calling someone a "patronizing fucking idiot" for a reasoned observation may want to reconsider their vehemence. The fact you are "only polite with girls" is telling. Nice people tend to not focus on gender as the reason for their approach. It may be heat of discussion but something to consider. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
There is no thing as being too nice. Women don't put men in ths friend zone, men put themselves in the friend zone by the little things they say and do 'wrong'. Subconsciously a woman will 'make up her mind' if she's into you or not.
There's a lot of info out there from sp called coaches that work. I've tried it all out and have probably fucked more women from POF and bumble theb here on fab"
What kind of coaches? |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
My experience has shown me that women in general do appreciate men who are polite and considerate. They're also attracted to assertiveness that's not overbearing and confidence that's not full blown cocky. Men can be nice but if they simultaneously have that fire and mischief in the eyes it normally proves a potent combination. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
There is no thing as being too nice. Women don't put men in ths friend zone, men put themselves in the friend zone by the little things they say and do 'wrong'. Subconsciously a woman will 'make up her mind' if she's into you or not.
There's a lot of info out there from sp called coaches that work. I've tried it all out and have probably fucked more women from POF and bumble theb here on fab
What kind of coaches?"
Private message me if you like.
In general, women will subconsciously shit test a guy (read up what it is) and if you 'fail' you're immediately relegated to the no fuck zone. I'm talking real dating here and not Fab dating.
Not being sexist here or owt like that, but women like to date 'up' if you appear to be below her at any stage it's over. Always had a problem until I did some research |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like a gentleman with a dirty mind
Perfectly described as to what I want "
Yup... a Gentleman who will open the door for you and spank your bum as you enter! |
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"I like a gentleman with a dirty mind
Perfectly described as to what I want
Yup... a Gentleman who will open the door for you and spank your bum as you enter! "
A gentleman with the ability to be a pure devil just by getting THAT glint in his eye. That's what I need in my life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like a gentleman with a dirty mind
Perfectly described as to what I want
Yup... a Gentleman who will open the door for you and spank your bum as you enter! "
I think those kind are still in the 1970s |
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"I think I’m too much of a nice guy for woman to think oooft I wanna tip his clothes off
I feel I fall into the friend zone because I don’t have that edginess
I make a lady smile, treat her like a lady , pay for the date sometimes cry with laughter but I wish I was a bit more of a lad .
Ladies are guys too nice to fuck that you only see them as friends or like a brother ?
My experience is many ladies like compassionate empathic men who treat them as both individuals and equals
Many are not so keen on sycophantic chameleons yes men
Both can be defined as nice
The majority of ladies iv had the pleasure of spending quality time have expressed their total disdain for the insipid bland and inarticulate use of the meh word "nice"
However I think it fair to suggest if a lady desires the fire in your eyes and pants being what you call nice wont put them off "
This!!
Being a good and kind person is attractive.
Being a wet flannel with no interests or opinions of your own and just claiming to like everything I do and agree with everything I say is both boring and transparent. As is only being "nice" to try and get what you want from a woman. That isn't nice, it's manipulation. |
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