FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > Are we missing something
Are we missing something
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lived in south west wales a year now and seems a very flat scene
Ok we used to have Chams , xstasia etc on our doorstep
We now have Newport on Friday or Saturday which compared to darlaston is barely busy
Love Newport, don’t get me wrong get and had some great times but are we missing anything
The socials are great if you’ve already chatted etc but not good to mingle as tend to be noisy and cliquey
Carmarthenshire one is ok BUT it’s in venues with non swingers so have to be careful
What are the genuine couples doing ? Is there an underground scene? Party scene ? We know lot less populated areas but apart from a lot of pushy single pushy guys - very little happening
Even dogging seems disappointing
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Got lots of friends some swing / some don’t
Most club scenes are more NSA ....
"
I dont see your point ?
You make contact on here with other couples in your area dont you ?
There are plenty around you so I dont see how everything is underground ?
And socials are not clique at all  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Got lots of friends some swing / some don’t
Most club scenes are more NSA ....
I dont see your point ?
You make contact on here with other couples in your area dont you ?
There are plenty around you so I dont see how everything is underground ?
And socials are not clique at all "
Not cliquey in your opinion?
For us they just seem to revolve around boozing and being loud
That’s fine if you enjoy it .. but noisy environments tend to cause cliques.. imho
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"Lived in south west wales a year now and seems a very flat scene
Ok we used to have Chams , xstasia etc on our doorstep
We now have Newport on Friday or Saturday which compared to darlaston is barely busy
Love Newport, don’t get me wrong get and had some great times but are we missing anything
The socials are great if you’ve already chatted etc but not good to mingle as tend to be noisy and cliquey
Carmarthenshire one is ok BUT it’s in venues with non swingers so have to be careful
What are the genuine couples doing ? Is there an underground scene? Party scene ? We know lot less populated areas but apart from a lot of pushy single pushy guys - very little happening
Even dogging seems disappointing
"
YES there is a underground scene and becomes apparent by reading members profiles and postings (definitely a select group thats been around for quite a while)   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bridgend social and Cardiff social are great you can mingle there no clicks yes your in a pub so need be careful in some respects but that same as anywhere. |
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By *arrapsMan
over a year ago
port talbot |
"Got lots of friends some swing / some don’t
Most club scenes are more NSA ....
I dont see your point ?
You make contact on here with other couples in your area dont you ?
There are plenty around you so I dont see how everything is underground ?
And socials are not clique at all "
Would have to disagree with you on that, I’ve been to many a social,and have at times been made to feel like a leper,ringing a bell and shouting out unclean.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well I've been to socials on many occasions and I have to agree with u they can be and are clicky....we know alot of people now so it's easy for us but we know where you're coming from defiantly... |
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There is no secret "underground scene", however, those that attend socials, network, and make friends will always have a better experience. How can you expect to be invited to parties etc if no-one knows you?
Socials can be a little daunting for newbies, but if you sit in a corner and don't mingle then you might think that they are "clique-y", which isn't the case. Small groups sitting together are just friends, if you go and introduce yourselves, they will welcome you. |
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Op you go on about xstasia? that is a nightclub scene.
You only get out what you put in, if you don’t approach other people then why should they approach you? But then maybe you do not look the approachable type.Yes at socials people know each other and have a great catchup with friends, who they met on the scene weeks/months even years ago, but we all have to start somewhere.
The underground scene you refer to, we have never heard of it in Wales so no idea if it even exists.
We are all a friendly bunch plenty of socials to attend Cardiff mid week social, Bridgend Sunday social, yes all in a pub, but it is not easy to hire a pub exclusive to swingers (but there is a reserved area, where it’s for us only) but if this is not comfortable to you, maybe you should just try harder to have private meets with people of your choice at your convenience which you prefer, maybe an empty room with no music and just swingers putting out the red carpet? |
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I have been to a few socials in Wales both on my own and with friends and I have to agree they’re very loud and extremely cliquey. I have heard people comment about me being at socials on my own. People can be judgmental about people that they don’t know.
It’s not about red carpets or loud music, it’s about being able to talk to people who have similar interests. Fundamentally we are there for the same reason, to swing?? Not to get d*unk, smoke drugs or other things I won’t mention. (Obviously people will take offence at my last statement)
And as for your comment about Xatasia, you have clearly not been! Plenty of playrooms which see plenty of action
Friends of mine say Carmarthenshire social is the only one it’s easy to chat at ( they not been to Bridgend ) |
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I find that there are always friendship groups, as many of the people who attend may have known each other for a long time.
However, if one can pluck up the courage to mingle, I find that they are quickly included in chats etc.
I attended my first ever social alone, around 2 years ago, when I was a newbie to the scene. I also attended various parties and the camping weekend alone. In all situations there was always somebody to talk to, someone to introduce you to others, providing that you are willing to step out of your comfort zone a tad 
All in all, I've had a blast.
It's helpful to discard the idea of 'clicks' and to instead realise that they are groups of friends
Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What amaze us is someone that don't seem to put in the effort complain about the clique. Now we no social butterflies but have not been to a social where once approach a group did not invite you in.
Once someone approach us we won't ignore them and groups of people don't ignore us.
Maybe we been lucky and the group's of people that run and go to the Cardiff,Bridgend and Newport social have all been great.
I think that sometime the folks that run one of the social have even extended the olive branch many times in effort to get folks together
They can't be fairer than that in getting people together. |
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The OP actually posted a social about nine months ago to be held in Llanelli,it's fair to say that the outcome appeared to be negative.
That's a pity really because they may have felt differently to the Socials scene. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We were told that going to chams and the greenhouse was all clique, we are also very new to this , have been out 3 times now and all 3 times in 2 diff places we have been made to feel nothing but welcome.
We have met alot of people who are fast becoming people we speak to daily .
I was terrified going into chams in Newport, and yet have had the best time any time we've been.
Same in the greenhouse, amazing time and everyone was so friendly and chatty .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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swansea social was the same thats why it died a death to clique and to many singles we used to go along regualry but no one spoke to us despite talking to others xxxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont think there has been one club or social across the UK (ive been about) that I have not been made to feel welcome.
Its all about wanting to make the effort to talk to people.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The social side is fantastic and to me being a single man it was easy to socialize with people, yes I am quite chatty and will get on with most but all you need to say is hello and you will get a welcome back.
Yes there are groups of friends there and you would get that in any sort of party or get together that people who know each other will congregate together for a catch up. Just say hello is all it takes. It can be daunting attending a social but my advice would be just see it has a drink in a pub and get chatting.
I live the social element of the scene |
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"The social side is fantastic and to me being a single man it was easy to socialize with people, yes I am quite chatty and will get on with most but all you need to say is hello and you will get a welcome back.
Yes there are groups of friends there and you would get that in any sort of party or get together that people who know each other will congregate together for a catch up. Just say hello is all it takes. It can be daunting attending a social but my advice would be just see it has a drink in a pub and get chatting.
I live the social element of the scene "
We have noticed that you expect people to say hello to you Firstly surely if everyone applied the same principle then there would just be silence. |
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