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Uphill battle?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I’ve been on site for years and met some brilliant people I keep in regular touch with. But this past 6 months I feel like I’m kinda losing track of why I’m here, and am no closer to finding what I’m really here for. It’s very deflating!

So I’m wondering if anyone else feels the same way and what you might do to lift yourselves a bit?

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Feel the same. Been off radar quite a while now and can't see me ever getting back in to the saddle.

Hope you find whatever you are searching for x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I guess it depends what it is you're really looking for, sometimes if you stop looking & just go with the flow & enjoy where it leads what you're looking for might just find you. I wasn't looking for anything but someone bumped right into me & we've been bumping together since, just over 6 years X

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By *ilthyfucks69Couple  over a year ago

Neverland

Sometimes a nice break from fab allows you to refresh and evaluate what you want then come back with a fresh pair of eyes

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ve been on site for years and met some brilliant people I keep in regular touch with. But this past 6 months I feel like I’m kinda losing track of why I’m here, and am no closer to finding what I’m really here for. It’s very deflating!

So I’m wondering if anyone else feels the same way and what you might do to lift yourselves a bit?

Xxx"

We are going through this ourselves, we work strange shifts and do 11-12 hour shifts so pretty much always feel knackered.

Over a year since our last meet and can't really see the next one coming not that we are stressing about it, if it happens it happens if not then we've had a great journey and met some great people along the way. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thanks all I’ve always taken regular breaks, it helps keep me sane (ish). How hard can it be to find someone to play with on a regular basis eh. Those of you that have found that I’m _rofoundly envious!

Maybe I just need to give myself a good kick up the arse

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thanks all I’ve always taken regular breaks, it helps keep me sane (ish). How hard can it be to find someone to play with on a regular basis eh. Those of you that have found that I’m _rofoundly envious!

Maybe I just need to give myself a good kick up the arse

"

I get where your coming from eleni... I've been doing this for 6 nearly 7 years... Personally I think I lost sight of what I do want and started concentrating on what I don't want...I think your experiences on here do that to you... But I'm starting to focus on what I want and the mood is starting to lift xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Omg it's hard work to maintain it in the beginning lol, takes lots of communication & in our case a deep friendship underlies the fun. But we've reached the point where we instinctively know what the other needs, wants or is thinking. Plus we have no rules beyond decency & respect X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We're also not an exclusive couple. Maybe that's your starting point are you looking for exclusivity or an open, more casual arrangement, you will both need to be on three same page X

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Thanks all I’ve always taken regular breaks, it helps keep me sane (ish). How hard can it be to find someone to play with on a regular basis eh. Those of you that have found that I’m _rofoundly envious!

Maybe I just need to give myself a good kick up the arse

I get where your coming from eleni... I've been doing this for 6 nearly 7 years... Personally I think I lost sight of what I do want and started concentrating on what I don't want...I think your experiences on here do that to you... But I'm starting to focus on what I want and the mood is starting to lift xxx"

That’s good advice! Maybe that’s what I’ve been doing lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We're also not an exclusive couple. Maybe that's your starting point are you looking for exclusivity or an open, more casual arrangement, you will both need to be on three same page X"

Definitely something more open for me. I’m not wanting an attachment to anyone beyond friendship and fun. I just want to enjoy it without hang ups really.

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By *r n1ceguyMan  over a year ago

Cardiff

I find it a nightmare on here single guys get such bad name on here .. got chatting to a lady last and she said i was a "bed hopper" due to my veries .. 99% of them are from socials gee whizz .. "should i stay or should i go now ???"

Good luck Eleni x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Socials, I find that helps. Have a laugh, merry liked minded people, no playing at socials, so just chat and laugh.

That helps me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it a nightmare on here single guys get such bad name on here .. got chatting to a lady last and she said i was a "bed hopper" due to my veries .. 99% of them are from socials gee whizz .. "should i stay or should i go now ???"

Good luck Eleni x "

Think you've had a near miss there, sounds like she was on the wrong site, isn't this a swinging site?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Understand where you coming from we are kinda new here and for us is the amount of rude single guys and time wasters with fake _rofiles who send pointless messages thats the put off when you are trying to meet other couples or friends

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By *ay rickMan  over a year ago

cardiff

Treat it as it is in a really busy bar on a night out--60% fuckwits 20% great people just not to go home with 10% well if I drink enough I may do and 10% oooooh I already got your coat for ya lmao get back to chilling n relaxing eleri your mojo is on it's way back I'm sure!!!

Goodluck

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By *otsoSnowWhiteWoman  over a year ago

My Ice Castle! South Wales

It's a annoying thing when you lose site of what you're looking for and the lines can get blurred along the way.

What I found the most annoying was other people thinking they knew what I wanted for me. They may have thought they meant well but it's caused no end of problems.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a annoying thing when you lose site of what you're looking for and the lines can get blurred along the way.

"

Never thought I would ever be quoting you and saying that I am in total agreement with you but there we go, you just voiced my sentiments exactly about how I have been feeling lately.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No idea why people are so intent on sticking to lines, what happened to go with the flow & enjoy fun along the way?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thanks everyone! It’s great to see others viewpoints and that I’m not alone with my frustrations. I think I need to reset my expectations and try to enjoy it for what I first got into it for. I’ve met some great people on here and it’s worth it just for that!

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By *rofMan  over a year ago

Around

I think lines get crossed and your always looking for the next experience to better the last one, when that doesn't happen you'll get frustrated with meets not being what you expect them to be or falling short.

Being negative only makes the next meet negative, you'll expect it to be less than what you want.

Take a step back, be positive and build on the meets as quickly or slowly as you need them to be.

The Newport socials are a great way to meet potential play mates.

There are people that will be compatible with your needs, they take time to find, but boy are they worth the search

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By *nique_GymMan  over a year ago

Cardiff

My issue is I am at a stage in my life where I don’t need or want to be emotionally dependent on a woman! My last long term partner was very controlling and domineering and as such the slightest whiff of that and I lose interest. I love having female friends but as soon as you date, that’s when the shift from friends moves towards them wanting and needing an emotional connection beyond what I am currently able to give! The people who know me I think understand that but it is bloody hard to find someone on the same wavelength!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My issue is I am at a stage in my life where I don’t need or want to be emotionally dependent on a woman! My last long term partner was very controlling and domineering and as such the slightest whiff of that and I lose interest. I love having female friends but as soon as you date, that’s when the shift from friends moves towards them wanting and needing an emotional connection beyond what I am currently able to give! The people who know me I think understand that but it is bloody hard to find someone on the same wavelength! "

That's why I stick with Ch3wy, he gets my need for emotional distance, he knows I care, I know he cares & he doesn't get upset that I don't want him in my vanilla life or that I don't want to see him all the time. We go with the flow & make that the times we are together are packed with as much naughty fun as we can. It's easy as human beings to fall into the trap of over thinking situations so we do sometimes have to pull ourselves back to simplicity X

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By *appy_days83Man  over a year ago

newport

I’ve realised a lot of the time it’s just chatting and when it comes to arranging up for meet they don’t respond. I’ve spoken to a handful of girls and we’ve really clicked but when it comes to meeting up they just come up with silly excuses or just keep delaying it. It’s annoying but that’s the bad side of a dating/sex site.

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By *ame1000Man  over a year ago

port talbot

Haven’t had any luck on here so far everyone seems all talk or just looking wanting pics

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Haven’t had any luck on here so far everyone seems all talk or just looking wanting pics"

Your pics & statuses might put some off mind. Just a thought X

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By *abtasticMrWolfMan  over a year ago

Llantrisant

Yeah get much the same from time to time. When you are looking for something more than just random hook ups but vanilla dating is never going to cut it. What and where do you look? Your local, friendly kinky swingers neighbourhood!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I guess it depends what it is you're really looking for, sometimes if you stop looking & just go with the flow & enjoy where it leads what you're looking for might just find you. I wasn't looking for anything but someone bumped right into me & we've been bumping together since, just over 6 years X"

Spot on I wasn't looking and now a few years down the line I'm happily married with some off fab

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I guess it depends what it is you're really looking for, sometimes if you stop looking & just go with the flow & enjoy where it leads what you're looking for might just find you. I wasn't looking for anything but someone bumped right into me & we've been bumping together since, just over 6 years X

Spot on I wasn't looking and now a few years down the line I'm happily married with some off fab "

Omfg I don't ever want to go that far, as lovely as your wedding was

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I guess it depends what it is you're really looking for, sometimes if you stop looking & just go with the flow & enjoy where it leads what you're looking for might just find you. I wasn't looking for anything but someone bumped right into me & we've been bumping together since, just over 6 years X

Spot on I wasn't looking and now a few years down the line I'm happily married with some off fab

Omfg I don't ever want to go that far, as lovely as your wedding was "

We said the same lol

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By *rgasmicFunCouple  over a year ago

Gwent

We r the same to, after 8+yrs 6 on fab 5 going to clubs, the buzz does start to go,not like when we were all newbies, couldnt sleep, on line most nights talking to sexy ppl u never knew existed, then the meets and first playings omg wtf cant get enough lol, as reality takes hold ,family, them growing old, grand children, vanila life slowly pulls u back, so when u do feel like the odd night in a club or meeting a nice cpl or single it does feel more enjoyable and sexy and worth the wait and what boundries lol fuck it go for it and enjoy, lifes to short guys have fun and take care xxx

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

[Removed by poster at 14/04/18 19:36:35]

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