FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > Itchy shit thread
Itchy shit thread
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What makes your shit itch/boils your piss in real life?
Checkout staff who squeeze your bread/whack your hobnobs down like a sledgehammer?
People who say "Pacifically" instead of "specifically"?
Get it off your chest in here. It'll make you feel better. You know you want to.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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People who stop dead in front of me in the street because they've seen something shiny in a shop window, like a fucking magpie - resulting in near sodomy. Cunts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure there is a lot more things that pi55 me off but 1st thing that springs to mind is people who get coffee granules in the sugar!  "
Omfg don't get me started on that shit!!!! They should be shot! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure there is a lot more things that pi55 me off but 1st thing that springs to mind is people who get coffee granules in the sugar! "
Fuck them complete and utter bastards ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Cold calling sales people. I know everyone needs to make ends meet but there are other options. Suck a dick or something - that's a more respectable profession. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People who leave drawers open  "
If you don't do the lid up properly on the ketchup and I shake it, I will fucking HUNT YOU DOWN.
(The general "you", not you specifically) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure there is a lot more things that pi55 me off but 1st thing that springs to mind is people who get coffee granules in the sugar!
Omfg don't get me started on that shit!!!! They should be shot! "
even worse is when they stir your tea with the spoon they used on coffee yuck yuck yuck!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you eat your steak well done, please just fucking kill yourself.
Feck orf I'll eat it how I like it!"
Omg you don't do you?? They should take your taste buds away lol x |
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"If you eat your steak well done, please just fucking kill yourself.
Feck orf I'll eat it how I like it!
Omg you don't do you?? They should take your taste buds away lol x"
Don't you start I have it medium to well cause I don't like blood  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you go to a supermarket and buy a paper with your shopping,the person at the checkout can never scan it without having to read the story on the front.....while you're just stood there waiting. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People who use their mobiles in supermarket aisles, askin their other half, if they didnt have that chees, should they get another type, FFS what did they do before mobiles? carrier pidgeon
"
"BUT THEY'VE ONLY GOT DAIRYLEA, LOVE - DO YOU WANT IT OR NOT? " |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who spit in the street.
People who stop and chat in the middle of a shop aisle completely oblivious to everyone around them. Grrr get out of my way dipshits.
Mrs x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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all the above
oh and kids who don't take their plate out but go out the kitchen for a drink!!
Fireworks being set off 2 weeks before Bonfire night and almost 2 months afterwards
Clothes being put on the wrong 'size' hanger in the store and you don't realise til you get home and think you've put on 4 stone cos you can't get the fecking things over your knees |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"all the above
oh and kids who don't take their plate out but go out the kitchen for a drink!!
Fireworks being set off 2 weeks before Bonfire night and almost 2 months afterwards
Clothes being put on the wrong 'size' hanger in the store and you don't realise til you get home and think you've put on 4 stone cos you can't get the fecking things over your knees"
Personally, I think all of these things should be punishable by a week in the stocks. Minimum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you eat your steak well done, please just fucking kill yourself.
Feck orf I'll eat it how I like it!
Omg you don't do you?? They should take your taste buds away lol x
Don't you start I have it medium to well cause I don't like blood "
It tastes so good though |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Checkout operators in asda merthyr. Ask do you want a hand packing. I say no yet they still do it. Cannot I multi task or what"
Immasculating motherfuckers.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure there is a lot more things that pi55 me off but 1st thing that springs to mind is people who get coffee granules in the sugar!
Omfg don't get me started on that shit!!!! They should be shot!
even worse is when they stir your tea with the spoon they used on coffee yuck yuck yuck!!!!"
Omg yuk yuk yuk
And liars
Two faced twats
People on a mobile while out in company gggrrrr |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i cannot stand toast crumbs left in the butter, cos some lazy sh1t couldnt be bother to clean their knife before sticking it in the butter"
Waterboarding is too good for them. |
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"i cannot stand toast crumbs left in the butter, cos some lazy sh1t couldnt be bother to clean their knife before sticking it in the butter
Waterboarding is too good for them. "
now thats a good idea......need to get my bucket out lol!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"someone drawing the phlegm up their chest and spitting on the floor in the swimming pool was enough to make me go bonkers!
Filth! "
my neighbour did this on my front lawn the other week
Omg 
I went nuts dirty bastard yuk |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure there is a lot more things that pi55 me off but 1st thing that springs to mind is people who get coffee granules in the sugar! "
lol my pet peeve  |
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Pettimindidness! Tit for tat players!
Bullies
Being told off for using certain swear words. My unconsciousness will use them all the more!
People who watch others struggle without offering to help!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My shit gets well and truly gripped at the supermarket checkout - when I've loaded all my stuff onto the tll conveyor belt and put down the "seperator thingy" to indicate that I'm done.... AND THEN THE NEXT BASTARD SHOVES THE SEPERATOR THINGY UP (yes I'm shouting!) to make more room for his/her stuff, thus squashing all my stuff up.
Other piss-boiling things:
Rude bus drivers
People on phones whilst driving
People who don't indicate
Middle lane hoggers
Toilet roll being the wrong way up (paper should go over the top!)
Passport control queues when there are 500 immigration staff sat there fucking about rather than tackling the queue
Theme park queues |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"English people
Ych  "
Is English and Proud to be so. 
People who leave one sheet of paper on bog roll so they dont have to change it
Liars and cheats
Men who leave the loo seat up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The English thing was a joke by the way just incase anyone who doesn't know me or my humour chose to take offence
"
Didnt take offence here lol. Just saying that I am an English bird lol. Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The English thing was a joke by the way just incase anyone who doesn't know me or my humour chose to take offence
Didnt take offence here lol. Just saying that I am an English bird lol. Xx"
That's good just wanted to make sure people didn't think I meant it seriously as you never know on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The English thing was a joke by the way just incase anyone who doesn't know me or my humour chose to take offence
Didnt take offence here lol. Just saying that I am an English bird lol. Xx
That's good just wanted to make sure people didn't think I meant it seriously as you never know on here "
I am a very outgoing person and do not take anything personally if I can help it. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"English people
Ych
Is English and Proud to be so.
People who leave one sheet of paper on bog roll so they dont have to change it
Liars and cheats
Men who leave the loo seat up"
Women who leave it down |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People who think they're funny when they aren't!
I think I'm funny enough thou that lad from Friday probably didn't agree in the morning ha ha
That was funny lol"
I'm 90% sure it's a women
I wouldn't lie to a English man 
Ha ha |
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"People who think they're funny when they aren't!
I think I'm funny enough thou that lad from Friday probably didn't agree in the morning ha ha
That was funny lol
I'm 90% sure it's a women
I wouldn't lie to a English man
Ha ha "
 |
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By *3xymamaWoman
over a year ago
Uptown Top Ranking |
Creases in the bottom sheet on my bed, I can't get into bed without smoothing out the bottom sheet
The open end of a pillow case facing the door
People who don't indicate
People who miss pronounce words
People who have the sound on their mobile in public is a huge bug bear for me too
Quite a lot of things really.Just call me Miss Angry.......lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ok ......
1. when you let someone out at a junction and they dont thank you !
2. when you take a shit and have firgotten you ran out of paper !
3. when you cant park outside your house because the neighbours park like twats
4. when idiots grunt and shout whilst lifting weights that they shouldnt be lifting
5. getting trainning advice from skinny men
6. going on a date and the lady be like i just want a salad
7. people banging the shit out of my work door ten mins before i open.
8. tight tops so tight on a guy you can poke your eye out on their nipples.
9. skinny jeans on men
10. people saying i am opinionated
bastardooooos !!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who put the milk in before the water when making tea
People who say...thats hilarious but aint laughing
Poeple who interupt you
When you take a girl out for dinner...they order a salad...then take your food...GET YR OWN CHIPS.
people who borrow your things and dont bring them back
People without manners |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People who think they're funny when they aren't!
I think I'm funny enough thou that lad from Friday probably didn't agree in the morning ha ha
That was funny lol
I'm 90% sure it's a women
I wouldn't lie to a English man
Ha ha
"
Pmsl |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The English thing was a joke by the way just incase anyone who doesn't know me or my humour chose to take offence
Up yours 
I love you "
I love ya too, you daft bint x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"ok ......
1. when you let someone out at a junction and they dont thank you !
2. when you take a shit and have firgotten you ran out of paper !
3. when you cant park outside your house because the neighbours park like twats
4. when idiots grunt and shout whilst lifting weights that they shouldnt be lifting
5. getting trainning advice from skinny men
6. going on a date and the lady be like i just want a salad
7. people banging the shit out of my work door ten mins before i open.
8. tight tops so tight on a guy you can poke your eye out on their nipples.
9. skinny jeans on men
10. people saying i am opinionated
bastardooooos !!!!! "
2. This is why they invented socks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People on a swingers site that don't swing "
Doesnt swing and dont feel that you should say that as people who do not swing normally have reasons why.
We also have just as much right to be here as you do. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"English people
Ych
Is English and Proud to be so.
People who leave one sheet of paper on bog roll so they dont have to change it
Liars and cheats
Men who leave the loo seat up
Women who leave it down "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm pretty chilled in life so mine are mostly gym related.
1) People who talk to me when my headphones are on. Just don't. Ever.
2) Absolute chumps who leave their weights lying around on the floor instead of putting them back.
3) People who just sit on equipment talking loudly to their mates when I actually want to use it. GTFO!
4) Women who turn up at the gym wearing a full face of slap and those right herbs with their Ibiza Rocks vests lower than their nipples. Shoot me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ok ......
1. when you let someone out at a junction and they dont thank you !
2. when you take a shit and have firgotten you ran out of paper !
3. when you cant park outside your house because the neighbours park like twats
4. when idiots grunt and shout whilst lifting weights that they shouldnt be lifting
5. getting trainning advice from skinny men
6. going on a date and the lady be like i just want a salad
7. people banging the shit out of my work door ten mins before i open.
8. tight tops so tight on a guy you can poke your eye out on their nipples.
9. skinny jeans on men
10. people saying i am opinionated
bastardooooos !!!!! "
Awesome xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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1) cruelty to children
2) cruelty to animals
3) people coming to this country for a better life then complaining about it and trying to change it to the country they came here from
4) lack of respect to the elderly
5) bedroom tax and any tax punishing the poor
7) the feckin gala bingo adverts
8) people stil calling it gay marriage it's just marriage get over it it's not a gay wedding ring is it!!!
9) booking fees when you use your card to buy tickets
10) sultanas in my curry
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"Ppl who doesn't like it when you are asking for a bj
Well if it's the women at the checkout in tesco then its understand able her saying no lol "
I've had a blow job from a woman at tesco she came out to the car and gave me one never spilt a drop gave great customer service |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog worse are the ones who bag it up, but then throw it in a hedge or tree to be left hanging there."
Yh they do my nut in too, may as well leave it than do that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog worse are the ones who bag it up, but then throw it in a hedge or tree to be left hanging there.
Yh they do my nut in too, may as well leave it than do that"
People who allow their dogs to shit near the school is the worst
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog worse are the ones who bag it up, but then throw it in a hedge or tree to be left hanging there.
Yh they do my nut in too, may as well leave it than do that
People who allow their dogs to shit near the school is the worst
"
Skools, playing fields always pick up and bin |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog "
I have the same bug bear about people who ride fucking horses in pedestrian areas
Let then shit all over the road and just trot off
Does my fucking head in
Should fine those wankers aswell as the lazy dog owners |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog
I have the same bug bear about people who ride fucking horses in pedestrian areas
Let then shit all over the road and just trot off
Does my fucking head in
Should fine those wankers aswell as the lazy dog owners"
Need a fecking big poop bag for that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lazy fecking dog walkers who can't b bothered to pick up after their dog
I have the same bug bear about people who ride fucking horses in pedestrian areas
Let then shit all over the road and just trot off
Does my fucking head in
Should fine those wankers aswell as the lazy dog owners
Need a fecking big poop bag for that"
They can drive back after with a fucking shovel and sort it out
Dirty lazy twats |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There is no law to suggest that a horse that defecates on any land, whether public or not, has to pick it up. Instead the rider has to be more considerate of where they ride their horse."
I know there isn't but there should be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Anyone that dunks their biscuits in their cuppa then drinks it after :/ eurgh!!
Even worse when they lose their biscuit in it and it become a lumpy cuppa |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone that dunks their biscuits in their cuppa then drinks it after :/ eurgh!!
Even worse when they lose their biscuit in it and it become a lumpy cuppa "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Customers who think they know it all but actually are the worst kind of stupid....
Confident but down right brain dead nuptys...
Winds me up a bewt makes everything 100 harder argghh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you're filtering in stopped traffic and some idiot pulls onto the white line on purpose so you can't get past "
People who belt down the outside lane approaching road works and force( some call it filtering) their way in right at the end when all sensible and decent drivers have got in early to avoid a bottle neck |
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"When you're filtering in stopped traffic and some idiot pulls onto the white line on purpose so you can't get past
People who belt down the outside lane approaching road works and force( some call it filtering) their way in right at the end when all sensible and decent drivers have got in early to avoid a bottle neck"
Oh yes I hate that!
Also buses that pull into a bus stop at an angle so that you cannot get past.
AND people who park in bus stops! |
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