FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > Was i wrong to turn down meet ?
Was i wrong to turn down meet ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I arranged a meet with a lady but a few days before this meet she said she had a STD. I looked it up and it can also lead to cancer.
I politely declined the meet as I did not want to risk myself or anyone else as it can be spread oraly also, and I want more to my meets than just quich sex.
She replied with a torrent of abuse and told me I should have a personality transplant but I was not rude and respectrul at all time.
Its made feel bad about myself but do you think I was right or wrong to decline the meet ? |
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as long as you were polite in your turning down the meet, then you are totally within your right to do so under the circumstance.
and 2 things to be grateful for firstly as she gave abuse, seems like you not missed on musch and secondly and more importantly at least she did do the right thing in telling you before the meet and not after regarding the std |
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"Or was it an arse pretending to be a woman and seeing what reaction they'd get.
Cynical me"
i did wonder if it was some testing to see reaction, but what the OP did was correct, what else could the OP really do other than risk his health |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its refreshing to see people who take care in themselves and have respect for the safety of others as well as yourself. You certainly have no need to question yourself... If anything, give yourself a pat on the back  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You did absolutely the right thing. She should have completely understood your drive for self preservation.
But as the old adage goes, misery loves company... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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thank you for the nice comments.
I was polite and not rude as I could not live with myself is I infected anyone as I love oral and foreplay as that's what makes a meet for me not just the sex.
I do respect that she told me before the meet which I thank her for but I don't understand why I had the abuse off her |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If anyone wants to message me privately I will tell you who she is as you know the rules on this site we are not allowed to name and shame thankt you all for your support as she has made me feel a bit guilty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If anyone wants to message me privately I will tell you who she is as you know the rules on this site we are not allowed to name and shame thankt you all for your support as she has made me feel a bit guilty"
I tried to message you to find out who, but your filters are blocking me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't wish to piss anyone off here but there are people on the site who have things like Herpes, not me might I add. Yes, this is an STi but it is manageable with treatment & those with it still have needs & some want to follow this lifestyle, they do the responsible thing & tell prospective meets. This then allows them the opportunity to make an informed choice about meeting,safe sex with people who have herpes is achievable. I'm wondering if this is the situation here, obviously I don't know but just a thought before everyone starts sharing names & vilifying people. I'm not condoning anyone who abuses another for deciding not to meet but I'm not sure sharing details of the person is the right thing either, especially guven that she did the responsible thing & told you before meeting X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I arranged a meet with a lady but a few days before this meet she said she had a STD. I looked it up and it can also lead to cancer.
I politely declined the meet as I did not want to risk myself or anyone else as it can be spread oraly also, and I want more to my meets than just quich sex.
She replied with a torrent of abuse and told me I should have a personality transplant but I was not rude and respectrul at all time.
Its made feel bad about myself but do you think I was right or wrong to decline the meet ?"
You need to Let guys know who she is.  |
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"I don't wish to piss anyone off here but there are people on the site who have things like Herpes, not me might I add. Yes, this is an STi but it is manageable with treatment & those with it still have needs & some want to follow this lifestyle, they do the responsible thing & tell prospective meets. This then allows them the opportunity to make an informed choice about meeting,safe sex with people who have herpes is achievable. I'm wondering if this is the situation here, obviously I don't know but just a thought before everyone starts sharing names & vilifying people. I'm not condoning anyone who abuses another for deciding not to meet but I'm not sure sharing details of the person is the right thing either, especially guven that she did the responsible thing & told you before meeting X"
i know she did the right thing in telling of her condition, but one worry is, now she was turned down a meet because of it, and got upset by that fact, she may not be so forth coming with the information and tell the next person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't wish to piss anyone off here but there are people on the site who have things like Herpes, not me might I add. Yes, this is an STi but it is manageable with treatment & those with it still have needs & some want to follow this lifestyle, they do the responsible thing & tell prospective meets. This then allows them the opportunity to make an informed choice about meeting,safe sex with people who have herpes is achievable. I'm wondering if this is the situation here, obviously I don't know but just a thought before everyone starts sharing names & vilifying people. I'm not condoning anyone who abuses another for deciding not to meet but I'm not sure sharing details of the person is the right thing either, especially guven that she did the responsible thing & told you before meeting X
i know she did the right thing in telling of her condition, but one worry is, now she was turned down a meet because of it, and got upset by that fact, she may not be so forth coming with the information and tell the next person"
Exactly  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"so you are saying I should not have turned down the meet because she may not tell anyone else ?"
Is that question aimed at me? If so, no, my point was the sharing of the identity & the ensuing witchhunt that will inevitably follow, because that's the nature of this site sometimes & as someone else points out, she is hardly likely to be up front in the future. If you read my comment again you will see that I did comment upon the abuse. I trust this clarifies it a little better for you x |
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