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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I often get into great messaging with potential meets.
As soon as I tell them I'm widower I don't here from them and they block me.
I'm also a dad as my wife passed away when our son was 2 years old and he lives with me, so meets have to be arranged.
I'm being honest and not hiding anything but it would appear that my situations a big turn off.
May I have your views and opinions please. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the problem may be if you mention it, they may think you are mentioning it because it could become of relevance- in that you could have a mental breakdown during a meet or start to cry or reminisce.
In all fairness, and no disrespect to your wife, but I don't see why you need to mention it on here in the general chit chat before meeting someone. I know I don't want to know everything about someone, ie not bothered where they work, what they do and what their current or past relationship history is. As simply, it's only nsa and not information I need to know and don't care about. It's also a hard statement to message back from. You either say "sorry to hear that", and carry on with a conversation which will then seem heartless. Or end up having a conversation about it, which isn't exactly foreplay......
That's just my take on it tho x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the problem may be if you mention it, they may think you are mentioning it because it could become of relevance- in that you could have a mental breakdown during a meet or start to cry or reminisce.
In all fairness, and no disrespect to your wife, but I don't see why you need to mention it on here in the general chit chat before meeting someone. I know I don't want to know everything about someone, ie not bothered where they work, what they do and what their current or past relationship history is. As simply, it's only nsa and not information I need to know and don't care about. It's also a hard statement to message back from. You either say "sorry to hear that", and carry on with a conversation which will then seem heartless. Or end up having a conversation about it, which isn't exactly foreplay......
That's just my take on it tho x"
I agree with most of this, we don't need to know this level of detail & for the causal meets it's irrelevant. However, some meets become more regular & sometimes you begin to share information, I would think it's at this point you might want to share such personal information x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh absolutely. If meets become regular then ultimately you do end up sharing more personal info. But it's not really something I think needs to be said straight away. It is a bit of a convo killer and could make things awkward  X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the problem may be if you mention it, they may think you are mentioning it because it could become of relevance- in that you could have a mental breakdown during a meet or start to cry or reminisce.
In all fairness, and no disrespect to your wife, but I don't see why you need to mention it on here in the general chit chat before meeting someone. I know I don't want to know everything about someone, ie not bothered where they work, what they do and what their current or past relationship history is. As simply, it's only nsa and not information I need to know and don't care about. It's also a hard statement to message back from. You either say "sorry to hear that", and carry on with a conversation which will then seem heartless. Or end up having a conversation about it, which isn't exactly foreplay......
That's just my take on it tho x"
It sounds awful to say this but some people may think it is part of your marketing strategy. Just like you often see doctors, soldiers etc trying to use their jobs to attract meets, some people may think you are trying to use the sympathy aspect.
Don't tell people until after you get to know them very well. At most all your meets need to know is that you are a single dad. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for the replies.
I don't mention it, but 99% of the time people want to know what's my job , relationship status and something else.
I don't lie but I don't offer the info.
Perhaps I should be a little less giving with info.
Thanks guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for the replies.
I don't mention it, but 99% of the time people want to know what's my job , relationship status and something else.
I don't lie but I don't offer the info.
Perhaps I should be a little less giving with info.
Thanks guys."
Just say then that you are a single dad as I don't think you need to say anything else until maybe you've met etc |
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