FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > advice for the single guy
advice for the single guy
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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i think its about time someone put a post on the forum offering advice to the single guys who seem to do the same post over and over again in the forum, either for meets, or blatantly fishing for meets, or moaning about not getting meets. as i have spent time on fab as a single guy myself i think im quite qualified to offer this advice.
The first fact for the single guys is you outnumber single ladies by about 6 to 1 and outnumber couples by about 8 to 1,thats going by a past post by someone who worked it out. so standing out and and showing yourself off to be a decent fella should be your top priority because to the ladies and couples have a massive choice of fellas and also make thier own choices who to meet and who not to meet.
secondly, yes this is a swingers site, as some refer to as a "fuck" site. there is a little community of true swingers who socialise and become friendly with each other and are usualy friends off the site as well, and there is the majority who use this site as a means to get sex and thats it. there is not a "clique" as has been mentio_ed so many times lately, just that these "true" swingers have been on the site for some time (years even) and you should understand that they have probably heard it all from some other guys before(everyday), so as in the first point, you need to stand out and be seen as a decent guy
Thirdly, you need to stop thinking that if you message someone that they have to reply. ive seen the amount of messages the ladies and couples get and they do not have to reply to every one. if you send another message making comment about being ignored then you are most likely to end up on their block list, and moaning about it on the forum isnt going to get you far at the end of the day if you think about it! and sending the "fancy a fuck" messages dont do you much good either, neither do blatant "copy and paste" messages. as before we have seen them loads of times before and learn to recognise them.
They are my points, feel free to add to them because im sure there more advice for single guys. as said before i myself spent some time on this site as a single fella and started out not knowing anyone on the site. yes i have a partner now so i have seen things from both sides of the fence.
So no axes to grind now please, just friendly advice only  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ohhh I got one put urself out there get urself known at socials etc that way people kno u do exsist and not hiding away behind a computer xx"
Fine if you live within reasonable distance but not always possible if you live in a remote area though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Single guys need to stop thinking that because the site is a 'fuck' site that they are entitled to have a fuck & that all fems are here to fuck anyone who shows the slightest interest. I don't know many fems here with that mindset, but get messages every day from countless guys who don't understand that there needs to be some attraction x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Single guys need to stop thinking that because the site is a 'fuck' site that they are entitled to have a fuck & that all fems are here to fuck anyone who shows the slightest interest. I don't know many fems here with that mindset, but get messages every day from countless guys who don't understand that there needs to be some attraction x"
And sometime you don't have to do anything and it still doesn't work out.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At yet again we are all tared with the same brush! Thanks for the advice  "
Not at all, your approach determines the response. I chat to several single guys & the reason why I chat to them & plan to meet? They follow some basic principles such as respect x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At yet again we are all tared with the same brush! Thanks for the advice
Not at all, your approach determines the response. I chat to several single guys & the reason why I chat to them & plan to meet? They follow some basic principles such as respect x"
Im entitled to my opinion as much as everyone else. It so annoying single guys this single guys that' ive been on here as a couple with my ex and i know alot of single guys are crap with messages but cant stand people who put us all in the same box, now ill get a ton of messages saying 'well your not going to get a meet now' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At yet again we are all tared with the same brush! Thanks for the advice
Not at all, your approach determines the response. I chat to several single guys & the reason why I chat to them & plan to meet? They follow some basic principles such as respect x
Im entitled to my opinion as much as everyone else. It so annoying single guys this single guys that' ive been on here as a couple with my ex and i know alot of single guys are crap with messages but cant stand people who put us all in the same box, now ill get a ton of messages saying 'well your not going to get a meet now' "
maybe mate, but, you have put yourself in that box by saying the usual single stuff. i put in my OP that single guys outnumber single ladies and couples by quite a large margin so you have to make yourself "stand out". and moaning about it just makes you seem like every other guy that whines on the forum about not getting meets, and no i dont mean every single guy so no tarring with same brushes. accept the facts, and mate, actually listen to advice. i have tried to explain the facts that you have to live with on the site and as a single fella myself i accepted them, i have also tried to explain what you can do to change it. not putting you into any box at all but your doing that yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i think its about time someone put a post on the forum offering advice to the single guys who seem to do the same post over and over again in the forum, either for meets, or blatantly fishing for meets, or moaning about not getting meets. as i have spent time on fab as a single guy myself i think im quite qualified to offer this advice.
The first fact for the single guys is you outnumber single ladies by about 6 to 1 and outnumber couples by about 8 to 1,thats going by a past post by someone who worked it out. so standing out and and showing yourself off to be a decent fella should be your top priority because to the ladies and couples have a massive choice of fellas and also make thier own choices who to meet and who not to meet.
secondly, yes this is a swingers site, as some refer to as a "fuck" site. there is a little community of true swingers who socialise and become friendly with each other and are usualy friends off the site as well, and there is the majority who use this site as a means to get sex and thats it. there is not a "clique" as has been mentio_ed so many times lately, just that these "true" swingers have been on the site for some time (years even) and you should understand that they have probably heard it all from some other guys before(everyday), so as in the first point, you need to stand out and be seen as a decent guy
Thirdly, you need to stop thinking that if you message someone that they have to reply. ive seen the amount of messages the ladies and couples get and they do not have to reply to every one. if you send another message making comment about being ignored then you are most likely to end up on their block list, and moaning about it on the forum isnt going to get you far at the end of the day if you think about it! and sending the "fancy a fuck" messages dont do you much good either, neither do blatant "copy and paste" messages. as before we have seen them loads of times before and learn to recognise them.
They are my points, feel free to add to them because im sure there more advice for single guys. as said before i myself spent some time on this site as a single fella and started out not knowing anyone on the site. yes i have a partner now so i have seen things from both sides of the fence.
So no axes to grind now please, just friendly advice only "
well said...and heres a high 5   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"At the end of the day guys need to be polite if you get no reply or told thanks but no thanks respect the ladies. Manners cost nothing "
exactly dude, there seems to be SOME single guys that think because they are on this site then they have to get what they are on here for. yes there are women on here and the vast majority are looking for fun, but that dont mean that they have to meet anyone that messages them.
after all "fancy a fuck/meet" wouldnt get you far face to face with a female, then why should it work on here? no, manners and making a good impression count for just as much on here as they would in the real world, as does attraction at the end of the day. if a lady says no then just accept it and move on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At yet again we are all tared with the same brush! Thanks for the advice "
No one is tarring anyone with the same brush.
What the OP actually says is that he was "offering advice to the single guys who seem to do the same post over and over again in the forum"  He didn't say he was giving advice to ALL single men!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Without tarring all single blokes with the same brush it does seem that those that send the fancy a fuck messages are playing a numbers game and of they send enough someone is going to say yep Ok. My view on this as the male half of a couple is that if you think that going up to any lady in a normal bar on a Friday night and saying as yoyur opening line fancy a fuck or nice tits would get you anything other than a slap across the face why do it by message on here although it's a swinging site it costs nothing to be polite |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have had meets off here and treat people with respect. I never message anything crude. My point being is that although well and good your advice is do you really think these guys will listen or even care. Im not moaning but i cant stand people that tell others what to do! |
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By *rsK69Woman
over a year ago
Neath |
"I have had meets off here and treat people with respect. I never message anything crude. My point being is that although well and good your advice is do you really think these guys will listen or even care. Im not moaning but i cant stand people that tell others what to do!"
Im all for offering advice if someone asks for it but I agree I dont understand why someone thinks it should be their 'job' to tell other men how to/not behave. Chances are those who need telling will not take a blind bit of notice anyway. Just my take on the matter |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i think its about time someone put a post on the forum offering advice to the single guys who seem to do the same post over and over again in the forum, either for meets, or blatantly fishing for meets, or moaning about not getting meets. as i have spent time on fab as a single guy myself i think im quite qualified to offer this advice.
The first fact for the single guys is you outnumber single ladies by about 6 to 1 and outnumber couples by about 8 to 1,thats going by a past post by someone who worked it out. so standing out and and showing yourself off to be a decent fella should be your top priority because to the ladies and couples have a massive choice of fellas and also make thier own choices who to meet and who not to meet.
secondly, yes this is a swingers site, as some refer to as a "fuck" site. there is a little community of true swingers who socialise and become friendly with each other and are usualy friends off the site as well, and there is the majority who use this site as a means to get sex and thats it. there is not a "clique" as has been mentio_ed so many times lately, just that these "true" swingers have been on the site for some time (years even) and you should understand that they have probably heard it all from some other guys before(everyday), so as in the first point, you need to stand out and be seen as a decent guy
Thirdly, you need to stop thinking that if you message someone that they have to reply. ive seen the amount of messages the ladies and couples get and they do not have to reply to every one. if you send another message making comment about being ignored then you are most likely to end up on their block list, and moaning about it on the forum isnt going to get you far at the end of the day if you think about it! and sending the "fancy a fuck" messages dont do you much good either, neither do blatant "copy and paste" messages. as before we have seen them loads of times before and learn to recognise them.
They are my points, feel free to add to them because im sure there more advice for single guys. as said before i myself spent some time on this site as a single fella and started out not knowing anyone on the site. yes i have a partner now so i have seen things from both sides of the fence.
So no axes to grind now please, just friendly advice only "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have had meets off here and treat people with respect. I never message anything crude. My point being is that although well and good your advice is do you really think these guys will listen or even care. Im not moaning but i cant stand people that tell others what to do!
Im all for offering advice if someone asks for it but I agree I dont understand why someone thinks it should be their 'job' to tell other men how to/not behave. Chances are those who need telling will not take a blind bit of notice anyway. Just my take on the matter "
I get what your saying completely and if I put names on there then to them named it would make more sense. It's just that a few have posted on this forum about not getting meets and getting quite nasty and bitter about it. Yet it's the same blokes, and it's a few of them, that message mine and my partners couple profile or her single profile with the "fancy a fuck"messages and get stroppy when we say we're not meeting at the moment. And they bitch because they not getting meets? I wonder why? Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I will only reply to decent, witty or polite messages. "FANCY A FUCK?" " I'D LOVE TO FUCK YOU" or "WHAT TIME?" ( if I have put up a meet) from someone I have never met will be ignored or deleted. Common decency goes far. A polite introductory message WITH a face pic is what will get a reply out of me, whether it's to say I am or I'm not interested. |
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"Ohhh I got one put urself out there get urself known at socials etc that way people kno u do exsist and not hiding away behind a computer xx"
Yup, socials are a definite big boost for the single guys. |
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The most successful single guy we ever knew had an unique way of getting meets and invites.... HE NEVER SENT A SINGLE MESSAGE!
Yes, he would reply to mails, and he would chat with friends, but he NEVER sent a message to a lady or couple he didnt already know.
He was very well thought of, got invites to parties and to accompany ladies to clubs, and he was always "busy" at the parties and clubs lol!
His secret?
Socials, lots of them.
He took time to be genuine, and make friends, without being pushy.... and it worked.
Of course, success breeds success, the more popular he became, the easier it was to get invites to parties, clubs and ladies bedrooms lol!
But it all started with him attending a social. |
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By *edMan
over a year ago
wales |
Just to concur...socials are one of if not the best way to get yourself noticed,Always to get to one a meet fiends and new people.
Some good advice given throughout this thread for the new and not so new and.
Happy swinging and fun times all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just to concur...socials are one of if not the best way to get yourself noticed,Always to get to one a meet fiends and new people.
Some good advice given throughout this thread for the new and not so new and.
Happy swinging and fun times all "
definitely the best way to get yourself out there and noticed and known |
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