FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > Why dont some women respond
Why dont some women respond
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Is it just me or everyone else. If i'm interested I'll send a message with the expectation of receiving I'm interested or sorry thanks no. Seems weird that when no limit on messages people don't bother.
Not being big headed but I'm pretty good looking, decent sized tool and a gentleman. Anyway Thought I'd ask the question why women dont respond b4 iGive up on this site |
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Ok seems im not up to the competition then. Thanks for chatting though. Not a great morale booster message but it's wierd as if im out i pull but on here it's impossible. Anyway thanks for your input. Not the swinging website for me. ?? |
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"I suppose as well why dont they say so. Anyway it's cool just that its a hook up site without much hooking up. ??"
It’s a swingers site not a hook up site..: you want t*nder for that.
Swinging is so much more than just sex.
I would suggest if you are really intrested in swinging get yourself to a social and meet people.
 |
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"It’s a swingers site not a hook up site..: you want t*nder for that.
Swinging is so much more than just sex."
It really really is. Some of my very best friends are people I've met through swinging. It's a safe space for us, isn't it? A little world where we can talk about everything without anyone judging. When I'm with swinging friends, it's like taking a pair of tight shoes off.
"I would suggest if you are really intrested in swinging get yourself to a social and meet people.
"
Always, always the socials. x |
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Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Perhaps not relevant, but as a couple, we are inundated with messages from single gentlemen asking to meet us, or even to meet me alone, away from my partner.
This, despite us asking that single men do not contact us.
I always send a polite response, and often ask why gentlemen go against our profile information and message me - generally the answer is much along the lines of ‘I thought I’d chance contacting’!!
I hate to disappoint single gentlemen- but so very clear on our profile.
As said, this comment may not apply to you, if you are only contacting single ladies/couples who are inviting single gentlemen to contact them.
Would also echo previous comment, your profile is lacking a pic and very limited narrative that might give a lady an indication of your personality.
Wishing you well.
Summer xx |
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Your profile text consists of two lines. That would rule you out straight away from our perspective. The entire point of a profile is to give the reader an indication of whether you are looking for similar things and whether it's worth the effort of chatting further.
There's not enough hours in the day for couples and single ladies on here to engage with every profile to see if they match so we rely on the profile text.
It's easy for people to assume someone with no information is either a pic collecting time waster or simply has nothing interesting to see. Neither of which are appealing for obvious reasons. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would reply back explaining "you're not my type" or "you live too far away" and I get a response of "What is your type" and "Distance isn't an issue for me".
I've had insults for saying no thank you and I've had a couple of lovely replies saying "Thanks for letting me know."
I've got my inbox below 100 once because it's ridiculous the amount of messages women get. I had a delightful message of being called a "c*nt" then blocked because I took too long to reply (even though I had given him my kik!)
Fab can be a great place, but it can also be vile at times.
I'd suggest update your profile a little bit if you would like a reply from women and couples. x |
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"I would reply back explaining "you're not my type" or "you live too far away" and I get a response of "What is your type" and "Distance isn't an issue for me".
I've had insults for saying no thank you and I've had a couple of lovely replies saying "Thanks for letting me know."
I've got my inbox below 100 once because it's ridiculous the amount of messages women get. I had a delightful message of being called a "c*nt" then blocked because I took too long to reply (even though I had given him my kik!)
Fab can be a great place, but it can also be vile at times.
I'd suggest update your profile a little bit if you would like a reply from women and couples. x"
We completely agree with this. We often reply to thank someone for the message and give a brief polite reason why its a no but it often leads to further messages and we have to resort to blocking them.
Like we said before though, make a bit of effort with profile text and you may be surprised how many more replies you get to messages. |
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"I would reply back explaining "you're not my type" or "you live too far away" and I get a response of "What is your type" and "Distance isn't an issue for me".
I've had insults for saying no thank you and I've had a couple of lovely replies saying "Thanks for letting me know."
I've got my inbox below 100 once because it's ridiculous the amount of messages women get. I had a delightful message of being called a "c*nt" then blocked because I took too long to reply (even though I had given him my kik!)
Fab can be a great place, but it can also be vile at times.
I'd suggest update your profile a little bit if you would like a reply from women and couples. x
We completely agree with this. We often reply to thank someone for the message and give a brief polite reason why its a no but it often leads to further messages and we have to resort to blocking them.
Like we said before though, make a bit of effort with profile text and you may be surprised how many more replies you get to messages."
This is our experience too. |
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"Is it just me or everyone else. If i'm interested I'll send a message with the expectation of receiving I'm interested or sorry thanks no. Seems weird that when no limit on messages people don't bother.
Not being big headed but I'm pretty good looking, decent sized tool and a gentleman. Anyway Thought I'd ask the question why women dont respond b4 iGive up on this site"
Guys outnumber females and couples here 100-1. Your inbox may be empty but theirs are not. A stream of one line 'hey how are you today?' messages and the like every single day. Do you really expect them to answer you just because you contacted them? The site rules are there for that purpose ie a no reply should be interpreted as a polite no thank you.
Nearly all of the messages we get every day are from guys who clealry didn't bother to read our profile and don't remotely match what we're looking for. Why should we waste our time replying to them?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is the problem with this site, some men think they are entitled to meet who they please!
Nobody ows anyone anything on here, if you get a reply happy days if not move on.. |
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"I suppose as well why dont they say so. Anyway it's cool just that its a hook up site without much hooking up. ??"
That one statement explains a lot.
You seem to expect hookups for sex with minimal effort, even with your own profile? If you're going to try socials, I assume you'll make an effort to present yourself nicely, look good, be polite and respectful etc. Does your profile and attitude here do the same thing?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suppose as well why dont they say so. Anyway it's cool just that its a hook up site without much hooking up. ??"
Haha you nailed your coffin with these words right here.. I am a single guy and I agree it’s much easier in person to strike up a conversation with people but I have met some great couples and women on here so it’s worth it in the end. |
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Why should people respond when you have made very little effort on your profile?
And besides, people don't owe you a reply. We, personally, do not reply if you do not have photos, text, or the message is very weak.
If you met us in a club, or a social, and you made an effort to be a lovely human, then we would absolutely chat with you all night. But we arent getting that from your profile, and why should we potentially risk our safety, and waste our time, meeting/messaging you?
Op, do your research. Sorry if this sounded harsh, but there are another 100 threads with exactly the same advice, I suggest you start reading and have a think if you want to put the effort in.
Good luck, we hope to see you on the socials!
Her x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I simply can't be arsed.
Rude I know, but us single ladies are inundated on times. "
Exactly this! I feel bad though when I'm in the forums commenting but ignoring my inbox x |
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to. "
Exactly if I say no thanks I have abuse so it’s easier to just not reply x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
Exactly if I say no thanks I have abuse so it’s easier to just not reply x"
I've then had messages "Can't even read my message and delete it. (Insert Insult of being a bitch, inconsiderate, you think you're better)" |
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
Exactly if I say no thanks I have abuse so it’s easier to just not reply x
I've then had messages "Can't even read my message and delete it. (Insert Insult of being a bitch, inconsiderate, you think you're better)""
Yep that’s the ones or ‘your fat/ugly/tramp/slut............ x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
Exactly if I say no thanks I have abuse so it’s easier to just not reply x
I've then had messages "Can't even read my message and delete it. (Insert Insult of being a bitch, inconsiderate, you think you're better)"
Yep that’s the ones or ‘your fat/ugly/tramp/slut............ x"
Or "I wasn't interested in you anyway!" Lmao. |
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
Exactly if I say no thanks I have abuse so it’s easier to just not reply x
I've then had messages "Can't even read my message and delete it. (Insert Insult of being a bitch, inconsiderate, you think you're better)"
Yep that’s the ones or ‘your fat/ugly/tramp/slut............ x
Or "I wasn't interested in you anyway!" Lmao.
"
lol yes xx |
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By *untiWoman
over a year ago
Newport |
"I suppose as well why dont they say so. Anyway it's cool just that its a hook up site without much hooking up. ??
Haha you nailed your coffin with these words right here.. I am a single guy and I agree it’s much easier in person to strike up a conversation with people but I have met some great couples and women on here so it’s worth it in the end. "
Well said  |
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some men on here are so fricking entitled! i'm saying that as a man. most if not all of us don't receive a message back 90% of the time! i understand that there are more single guys than ladies and couples combined and thats ok! you just need to be patient! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You cannot seem to please everyone no matter which approach you take here.
I have had equal amounts of abuse from couples as well as the men, but also messages of thanks for taking the time to respond.
I will try to reply to messages where I can, with a polite no thank you, but it is not always possible.
Filters are a great way to cut down on unwanted messages, but if all else fails then block seems the only answer |
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i think you thanked me for messaging you and let me down gently. thank you. that was really nice of you but in no way should you feel like you have to. everybody has different preferences and with the amount of mail you probably receive i can imagine that would be very time consuming. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I simply can't be arsed.
Rude I know, but us single ladies are inundated on times.
Exactly this! I feel bad though when I'm in the forums commenting but ignoring my inbox x"
The thing is, you answer one message, and in the time you've done that, another 10 appear.
I dont know anyone who has time for that shiz.
Its easier to just pick through and answer the messages that stand out |
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"I don't reply to everyone and I'm not receiving hundreds or thousands of messages a day.
I had a one word message last night, didn't really make me want to reply.
Why not? What was the word? "
Hi  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I simply can't be arsed.
Rude I know, but us single ladies are inundated on times.
Exactly this! I feel bad though when I'm in the forums commenting but ignoring my inbox x
The thing is, you answer one message, and in the time you've done that, another 10 appear.
I dont know anyone who has time for that shiz.
Its easier to just pick through and answer the messages that stand out "
I wish there was a way to hide when you're online. x |
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I would personally remove the ‘expectation‘ when you send a message! Trust me, if you don’t expect a response then it doesn’t hit you when you don’t get one! I also send messages to ladies and get nothing back, and that’s ok as I’m clearly not for them! Happy fabbing  |
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"I would personally remove the ‘expectation‘ when you send a message! Trust me, if you don’t expect a response then it doesn’t hit you when you don’t get one! I also send messages to ladies and get nothing back, and that’s ok as I’m clearly not for them! Happy fabbing "
Yup this is definitely our approach, I delete initial messages we send so I can't check if they've been read or deleted etc. And then sometimes you get a happy surprise  |
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"I don't reply to everyone and I'm not receiving hundreds or thousands of messages a day.
I had a one word message last night, didn't really make me want to reply.
Why not? What was the word?
Hi "
Stop being fussy
I get longer messages but they normally just say "your site support is ending" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to. "
I totally agree with this. L
Pictures and profile content is a must for me and if your message says something like "hi" or "I'd love to fuck you" and nothing else then it's a no from me |
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"I don't reply to everyone and I'm not receiving hundreds or thousands of messages a day.
I had a one word message last night, didn't really make me want to reply.
Why not? What was the word?
Hi
Stop being fussy
I get longer messages but they normally just say "your site support is ending" "
I had one of those lovely messages last week |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've blocked single men now, but I didn't respond to many people because I would just get trivial shite that would be sent probably every other woman on the site - I don't really care that it was sent to everyone else but compliments felt so hollow and I got bored of reading the same crap.
It's hard to stand out on fab - but as so many people have said before- go to clubs, go to socials, make friends and you'll get a lot further. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or everyone else. If i'm interested I'll send a message with the expectation of receiving I'm interested or sorry thanks no. Seems weird that when no limit on messages people don't bother.
Not being big headed but I'm pretty good looking, decent sized tool and a gentleman. Anyway Thought I'd ask the question why women dont respond b4 iGive up on this site"
I think the big issue is speaking from experience of an old couples account. If you reply stating why you aren't interested it dents the men ego and they can get border lone abusive. I'd imagine this is even worse for women as apposed to couples. |
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Mate this place can be tough but your profile is your selling points and you aren’t selling yourself well there’s nothing there for women to connect with at all
You got 3 pics and two of them are your dick!
I’ve been to socials, chams and have previously been in the scene and still haven’t had a meet since rejoining the site
Update the profile, get out and be social at the social events
Get to know people and network a litttle more
It’ll happe.
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
"
Messaging is a pointless exercise.
If you want to meet people and have fun you need to get off your ass and get to a club or social. People will see you for who you really are then.
And no good giving excuses that you can't get there etc as plenty of others bust their gut getting to them.
It grips my balls that we continue to get these sort of threads from single males that expect results but don't want to put in the effort  |
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"
Messaging is a pointless exercise.
If you want to meet people and have fun you need to get off your ass and get to a club or social. People will see you for who you really are then.
And no good giving excuses that you can't get there etc as plenty of others bust their gut getting to them.
It grips my balls that we continue to get these sort of threads from single males that expect results but don't want to put in the effort "
I concur, get yourself to a social. I did and now I'm drowning in pussy. Honestly mate you wouldn't believe it.
All joking aside, a social is a good idea. I did my first the other week, shit my self but met some great people. A lovely lady held my hand. Definitely going to another. |
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
Messaging is a pointless exercise.
If you want to meet people and have fun you need to get off your ass and get to a club or social. People will see you for who you really are then.
And no good giving excuses that you can't get there etc as plenty of others bust their gut getting to them.
It grips my balls that we continue to get these sort of threads from single males that expect results but don't want to put in the effort "
Not sure we entirely agree with this. Don't get us wrong, socials and clubs are a great way of meeting people and getting your faces known.
Messaging isn't a pointless exercise at all though. We have met multiple single guys and each of them started with a well written message and were followed up by us being impressed by the effort they had taken on their profile.
Obviously attraction and interests have to also be there but the message and profile and the two start points.
The meeting at social events approach wouldn't work for us as we don't attend any events or clubs in our local area. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with what you have said, however there are those who can put a good message together and have a well laid out profile that makes them appealing.
The issue is that some just don't understand that paitence and presentation is key to meeting others on the site when men outnumber women and couples 3-1. |
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"Perhaps take a look at your profile. I never respond to anyone who hasn’t set a profile picture. Also you have no text content - which again wouldn’t get a reply from myself.
Women on here are often subjected to a barrage of abuse when no matter how politely we say no thank you so it’s far easier to either just delete or some choose to block to.
I disagree I message people before meeting x
Messaging is a pointless exercise.
If you want to meet people and have fun you need to get off your ass and get to a club or social. People will see you for who you really are then.
And no good giving excuses that you can't get there etc as plenty of others bust their gut getting to them.
It grips my balls that we continue to get these sort of threads from single males that expect results but don't want to put in the effort "
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There are far more males on here than females and as far as guys go, we can be pigs. Persistent ones at that.
If you don’t get a response, you just have to let it go. If your message has been read but you haven’t had a reply, it’s best to take that as a no. No one should be subjected to abuse just because they ignored your message.
As most people have pointed out, women get inundated with messages. It would be unreasonable to expect them to respond to every one of them. Especially when most of them are likely to be “wanna meet now” or “want to get fucked”. Even if you put all the effort into making the message interesting. If she’s not interested, then she’s not interested. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As it’s already been said. It’s impossible to answer every message, there simply aren’t enough hours in a day.
I try to respond to decent messages where the sender has clearly read my profile, but even then it doesn’t necessarily mean anything will come to fruition.
I delete messages rather than provide a no thank you because the abuse or a demand to know why is something I’d prefer to avoid.
It’s nothing personal, but unfortunately many here take it extremely personally |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suppose as well why dont they say so. Anyway it's cool just that its a hook up site without much hooking up. ??
It’s a swingers site not a hook up site..: you want t*nder for that.
Swinging is so much more than just sex.
I would suggest if you are really intrested in swinging get yourself to a social and meet people.
"
This |
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By *atKat-xoxWoman
over a year ago
Neath,united kingdom |
"I would personally remove the ‘expectation‘ when you send a message! Trust me, if you don’t expect a response then it doesn’t hit you when you don’t get one! I also send messages to ladies and get nothing back, and that’s ok as I’m clearly not for them! Happy fabbing "
That's insane. You're absolutely gorgeous  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or everyone else. If i'm interested I'll send a message with the expectation of receiving I'm interested or sorry thanks no. Seems weird that when no limit on messages people don't bother.
Not being big headed but I'm pretty good looking, decent sized tool and a gentleman. Anyway Thought I'd ask the question why women dont respond b4 iGive up on this site"
I would suggest you look at what you want. This isn't a hookup site. Like what the ladies are saying you have to be courteous for starters. I would certainly suggest having a think about your profile if ypu do stay and want to live this lifestyle properly. It isn't necessarily about sex, it's about the connections, the learning from one another and the fact we are all able to talk about our lives without the fear of being judged. If someone doesn't reply, leave it and move on. Try going to a club and talking to people face to face. Not just asking for a quickie but have a full blown conversation with people. It's just my advice and I have made some great friends on fab because I don't push and I don't it for the right reasons.
Good luck tho whatever you choose to do. |
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