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What's the deal?

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

I send lots of messages which are never read nor is my profile viewed. Obviously get it that not everyone would be interested in me, but I don't understand why the messages aren't even read.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You just answered your own question really

There is also an option to read a message then mark it as unread so someone may well have read your message, checked your profile in stealth mode, and not been interested so done that and you wouldn't know

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

Thanks didn't know that. If it was read or even better read and deleted it would make it clear that they are not interested. Not sure why someone would do that...Just fills up the inbox

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Because a lot of men get arsey if their message is deleted without a reply

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay


"Because a lot of men get arsey if their message is deleted without a reply"

Thanks for explaining. I bet them getting arsey really helps them to make a positive impression...not. So what you are saying is that I need to accept that if it's not replied to they are definitely not interested. Not going to do a lot for my self esteem...lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Because a lot of men get arsey if their message is deleted without a reply

Thanks for explaining. I bet them getting arsey really helps them to make a positive impression...not. So what you are saying is that I need to accept that if it's not replied to they are definitely not interested. Not going to do a lot for my self esteem...lol"

Pretty much, although there are probably occasions where messages get overlooked due to the volume received

You can delete a message from your sent messages as soon as you send it so then you can't worry about it again

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

I could do that but I like the excitement of seeing that a message has been read and the anticipation of a reply...sad I know.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I could do that but I like the excitement of seeing that a message has been read and the anticipation of a reply...sad I know."

It's not sad

I just thought as you said the unread messages were bothering you it would save you having to see them

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

Yeah I do seem a bit confused don't I. Put it down to lockdown

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By *luebell888Woman  over a year ago

Glasgowish

Sometimes mesages can be read without clicking on them if only one or two lines

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay


"Sometimes mesages can be read without clicking on them if only one or two lines "

I tend to send longer messages. Maybe people get bored reading to the end

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By *carlett AllureWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff

My account is hidden from showing if I have viewed someone, I usually look at the profile, make my decision on if they are for me or not. If the latter the message is deleted without a read.

Although the amount of messages I get it’s impossible to do that with all so mainly if they aren’t local, not my age rage, no profile picture or the opening few words of the message are bland or rude then that get a straight delete!

Honestly you need to look at the number of men to women/couples ratio on here and you’ll see we can’t be expected to read and reply to everyone. If it’s knocking your self esteem you need to think about things alittle in the politest way.

Good luck x

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

Clearly my sarcasm was missed

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What are you messaging for anyway ?

Its very rare I message as a single male as it really doesnt get you anywhere as most women have so many messages they are simply overwhelmed.

Think very carefully about what your going to say. Keeping up with daily statuses is a good start to show you have taken the time to get to know about who your messaging.

Never put yourself down. Just because you dont get a reply doesnt mean there isnt somone on here that will want to engage with you. Patience is your best friend.

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By *emon DelightMan  over a year ago

South Wales

Not necessarily a criticism, but maybe your profile needs a little work? There is so much competition on here, and your profile is quite literally your shop window. You really need something special to stand out from the rest of the guys - for starters, your current description doesn’t really say much about you, or what you’re looking for?

That being said, I’ve spent a fair bit of time improving my profile over the last couple of years, and I still feel like the invisible man sometimes! Could be I’m just an ugly bastard, tho? lol

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

[Removed by poster at 20/06/20 00:36:48]

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

Good advice. Thanks

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By *emon DelightMan  over a year ago

South Wales


"Good advice. Thanks "

You’re welcome, dude - it’s a tough time to be starting out on this site, given that socials are no longer an option. But with patience and a positive attitude, good things can happen

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By *uckOfTheBayMan  over a year ago

Mold


"I send lots of messages which are never read nor is my profile viewed. Obviously get it that not everyone would be interested in me, but I don't understand why the messages aren't even read."

Have a gander at the site FAQs

There's actually quite a good bit of info there

Unsurprisingly a lot of it is about single males

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

To the person who sent me a message saying you meant no malice and was pretty savage. I would have replied to you respectfully if you hadn't blocked me. You seem to have completely misjudged what I was saying. I am not expecting everyone to throw themselves at me, far from it. I simply started this thread to try to find out why messages seemed to be unread and my profile not viewed. So no I didn't find your message helpful,but thankfully most members are more friendly.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To the person who sent me a message saying you meant no malice and was pretty savage. I would have replied to you respectfully if you hadn't blocked me. You seem to have completely misjudged what I was saying. I am not expecting everyone to throw themselves at me, far from it. I simply started this thread to try to find out why messages seemed to be unread and my profile not viewed. So no I didn't find your message helpful,but thankfully most members are more friendly."

I don't think you're meant to discuss private messages on the forum. If someone blocks you it is because they do not wish to engage further. P.s it wasn't me

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By *leasure giver 17 OP   Man  over a year ago

Colwyn Bay

Ok thanks and no it wasn't you. I won't comment any further

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