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Discussing swinging with gf
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi there, newish member but I’m looking for some advice on how to bring up swinging with my gf. We saw a film recently that was kinda this theme and she was glued to it but we didn’t discuss it tbh.
Looking to get onto the scene with her so any advice is needed as we need to liven things up. |
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Best thing to do is be onest with her and talk to her about swinging and find out her feelings about it all ,that's the first thing I would of done not make a single profile on here,thenif she's happy and want to try then make a couple profile |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Best thing to do is be onest with her and talk to her about swinging and find out her feelings about it all ,that's the first thing I would of done not make a single profile on here,thenif she's happy and want to try then make a couple profile "
Scared of what she may say or think. Ideally want a guy to message and meet up with her to see if she’s open to fucking other guys so I can go from there |
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"Best thing to do is be onest with her and talk to her about swinging and find out her feelings about it all ,that's the first thing I would of done not make a single profile on here,thenif she's happy and want to try then make a couple profile
Scared of what she may say or think. Ideally want a guy to message and meet up with her to see if she’s open to fucking other guys so I can go from there "
That’s the worst way to go about it.  |
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That's definitely the worst thing to do ,be onest and talk to her ,if to scared to talk to her about swinging I would forget about the idea and enjoy each other and in time you might be comfortable enough to talk to her about it |
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Don't think having a singles profile on here is a good way to get her into the scene. More likely to end in a brake up than a swinging profile. I agree completely with dropping in questions from time to time. Maybe discuss your bi side with her might be a good way in. Even if she does fantasise about swinging. Fantasy and reality are two very different things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you’re next having sex tell her how much the film turned you on and ask if it turned her on too? That should give you a pretty good clue. What film was it btw? |
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It's a very delicate situation. She could take it as she's not enough for you. Or that you want to see other women.
How is your relationship? Is this something to revive a flagging one? Or is it still at the fresh and exciting stage? Has she has a lot of sexual partners? Or is she relatively inexperienced? If she's more 'travelled' then she may be more open to other partners.
Being absolutely honest is the key. And it has to be something she wants to do, not just to please you.
We got started after a friends house party game turned pretty sexy. We had a long chat over the following days about how we felt about it and how further we'd have gone. We then looked into swinging and came here. It came from a shared experience that we explored and built on. So you need that initial spark as opposed to just springing it on her. Watching Swinger porn together is a good start. Maybe role play a threesome using blindfolds and toys. Good luck!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Best thing to do is be onest with her and talk to her about swinging and find out her feelings about it all ,that's the first thing I would of done not make a single profile on here,thenif she's happy and want to try then make a couple profile
Scared of what she may say or think. Ideally want a guy to message and meet up with her to see if she’s open to fucking other guys so I can go from there "
Really really not a good idea in my opinion.
My husband spent 2 years talking to me about it. I could weigh up the pros and cons and get mentally ready for it to happen
Please don't just spring it on her.. you need to make sure that she will be comfortable in that situation.
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When I first met my partner she talked about threesomes. I was taken aback at the time as she had previously said she had only ever had one partner. I now feel I would like to try it.
I was on here before we met but have never physically met anyone. Any suggestions how to gauge her readiness? |
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I have the same situation with my gf..we often talk about it but she told me once that she is scared to get greedy and hurt my feelings..i d love chat with someone like me..happy to swap gf pics too |
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By *itenDaysCouple
over a year ago
Vale of Glamorgan |
"Hi there, newish member but I’m looking for some advice on how to bring up swinging with my gf. We saw a film recently that was kinda this theme and she was glued to it but we didn’t discuss it tbh.
Looking to get onto the scene with her so any advice is needed as we need to liven things up."
There are a few podcasts out there we would recommend listening to Casual Swinger you can find it on there site, there is some good advice there on how to approach the subject.
Be honest and approach carefully and test the waters, communication is the key to all of this.
Nobody knows your girlfriend better than you, take your time and start your journey when you are both ready and not before.
It took us a few years to finally take the plunge but communication and honesty have brought on an incredible journey that has enhanced our relationship and we have made some great friends along the way. |
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It can be a difficult one, however, not being honest about how you feel will cause issues whether it be now or later down the line.
I agree with most of the comments here just be open about it, sure there's a risk but ultimately assuming you haven't done anything wrong the only thing she'd say is no not into it. You make a decision there whether its a deal breaker or not. |
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By *elt77Man
over a year ago
Towyn |
Be careful,in early February this year, I was a happily married man. I was into all this with a previous relationship. I was missing it,so I suggested it to liven things up.she called me a pervert. Now I am very single. Turned out she was having an affair. Good luck. |
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By *rsandMrCouple
over a year ago
aldridge |
Just be honest,,there was no way I thought my wife would be up for letting other guys have her.
It took me 20years to have the guts to talk to her lol...imagine my delight when she agreed ??
Talk to her, be honest and calm. You may well get a nice surprise ??
I did ???????? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't think having a singles profile on here is a good way to get her into the scene. More likely to end in a brake up than a swinging profile. I agree completely with dropping in questions from time to time. Maybe discuss your bi side with her might be a good way in. Even if she does fantasise about swinging. Fantasy and reality are two very different things. "
Tend to agree with this, she'll soon find out you were here alone, it's a very small scene & nothings secret. If you really want this then do it the right way, go away & talk n plan with her together X |
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