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My family is breaking the rules
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe remind them of what they were saying about the neighbours?"
I have! When he announced he was coming over I reminded them straight away what they have been saying about other people and that they were being hypocrites. They said that they weren't even sure he was coming in anyway and he would probably just leave the food at the door but as soon as he got here they invited him in so they obviously just said that to placate me. I don't want to say anything in front of him as he has been helping me out a lot lately with some stuff and don't want to start rowing with him. Just don't understand why we've been following the rules so strictly for 6 weeks when they obviously don't think they apply to them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can see why you are upset. I have a 3 year old boy from a past relationship. My mum is in the high risk category and has been shielding. She has not seen her grandson since about a week before the lockdown.
It was my weekend with my son last weekend. Me and Bella took the decision that my mum and dad should see their grandson because not seeing him for, what could be, 18 months, well, she could blimin die anyway before the end of lockdown (she has multiple myeloma). So, we went round, however, we did not enter the house, we sat half way down the garden and my folks sat on the patio. We didn't touch the side gate to get into the garden. My son was told he could not go near nanny and grandad, just blow them kisses. My dad brought us out a coffee and left it in a tray. We didn't touch the tray and I told him to put the cups straight in the washing up bowl, into hot water.
It did them the world of good to see him, and we had a nice time whilst keeping well away. It can be done, and will have to be going forward. It's a shame your brother didn't take the same approach. I hope your family stay well x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can see why you are upset. I have a 3 year old boy from a past relationship. My mum is in the high risk category and has been shielding. She has not seen her grandson since about a week before the lockdown.
It was my weekend with my son last weekend. Me and Bella took the decision that my mum and dad should see their grandson because not seeing him for, what could be, 18 months, well, she could blimin die anyway before the end of lockdown (she has multiple myeloma). So, we went round, however, we did not enter the house, we sat half way down the garden and my folks sat on the patio. We didn't touch the side gate to get into the garden. My son was told he could not go near nanny and grandad, just blow them kisses. My dad brought us out a coffee and left it in a tray. We didn't touch the tray and I told him to put the cups straight in the washing up bowl, into hot water.
It did them the world of good to see him, and we had a nice time whilst keeping well away. It can be done, and will have to be going forward. It's a shame your brother didn't take the same approach. I hope your family stay well x"
We were going to do exactly this with my sister and nephew for my mum's birthday a couple of weeks ago but the night before me and my mum spoke about it and decided it was too risky so we cancelled. I don't get how my brother has managed to worm his way in?! Especially as he is literally in our living room with us, not even spaced apart in the garden or anything. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can see why you are upset. I have a 3 year old boy from a past relationship. My mum is in the high risk category and has been shielding. She has not seen her grandson since about a week before the lockdown.
It was my weekend with my son last weekend. Me and Bella took the decision that my mum and dad should see their grandson because not seeing him for, what could be, 18 months, well, she could blimin die anyway before the end of lockdown (she has multiple myeloma). So, we went round, however, we did not enter the house, we sat half way down the garden and my folks sat on the patio. We didn't touch the side gate to get into the garden. My son was told he could not go near nanny and grandad, just blow them kisses. My dad brought us out a coffee and left it in a tray. We didn't touch the tray and I told him to put the cups straight in the washing up bowl, into hot water.
It did them the world of good to see him, and we had a nice time whilst keeping well away. It can be done, and will have to be going forward. It's a shame your brother didn't take the same approach. I hope your family stay well x"
I'm sorry to hear about your mum btw. I'm glad to hear your visit cheered her up x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see why you are upset. I have a 3 year old boy from a past relationship. My mum is in the high risk category and has been shielding. She has not seen her grandson since about a week before the lockdown.
It was my weekend with my son last weekend. Me and Bella took the decision that my mum and dad should see their grandson because not seeing him for, what could be, 18 months, well, she could blimin die anyway before the end of lockdown (she has multiple myeloma). So, we went round, however, we did not enter the house, we sat half way down the garden and my folks sat on the patio. We didn't touch the side gate to get into the garden. My son was told he could not go near nanny and grandad, just blow them kisses. My dad brought us out a coffee and left it in a tray. We didn't touch the tray and I told him to put the cups straight in the washing up bowl, into hot water.
It did them the world of good to see him, and we had a nice time whilst keeping well away. It can be done, and will have to be going forward. It's a shame your brother didn't take the same approach. I hope your family stay well x
I'm sorry to hear about your mum btw. I'm glad to hear your visit cheered her up x "
Yeah, she was so happy to see him. X |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"if your mother is as you say extremely vulnerable has your mother got the letter saying stay home if so show it them "
Yeah she got the letter saying she was extremely vulnerable as she is having chemotherapy (not for cancer, she has another disease which requires it). And obviously my brother knows bc she made a massive deal of it and told everyone she could as soon as she got the letter. |
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I'm sorry to hear of this, which primarily is his behaviour, as he has entered your collective home - though they encouraged him in. And you were ignored. So tough! I'd be in turmoil.
You can't reverse this now but I'd aim to get agreement once he's gone and it's calmed down, that nobody should intrude on your isolating family home again, due to the risk of hidden fresh infections being introduced. Affirm your love and wishes that nobody gets infected and possibly dies. |
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To be honest if your mum was happy to see them.. I'd not let it stress you.. so many are now doing similar....
You can't change what's happened and if your mum was happy... perhaps it will do her more good than you think.
They have actually been saying about extending the amount of people you can mix with to be fair x
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There is not a single shred of evidence that children under 10 can transmit the virus onto adults according to the who. Switzerland have lifted the restriction of children under 10 visiting there grandparents, nothing our government has confirmed.
Not sure if your brother is under 10, if so pretty impressive considering he is a father and can grow his own veg. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So what happens if she now gets sick ? Is he going to accept that he has put her in danger?
This is the reason why it’s spread so fast because people just cannot do what is asked of them even if it’s for their own good |
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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago
upton wirral |
"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites. "
I do understand you have every right to be angry
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites. I do understand you have every right to be angry"
Thanks but this happened 4 weeks ago haha I'm over it now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites. "
At the start my family took a flippant view on it, my cousin died of covid at 38, 2 of my sisters had it one in hospital for 5 weeks the other bed ridden for 3 weeks, all for the sake of a family bbq. |
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"Something was said about grandparents seeing grandchildren, somewhere, but it was still at 2 meters apart and definitely not in houses  "
I am lucky as because of my oldest living with me. I get to see my oldest 3 grandkids twice a week.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites.
At the start my family took a flippant view on it, my cousin died of covid at 38, 2 of my sisters had it one in hospital for 5 weeks the other bed ridden for 3 weeks, all for the sake of a family bbq. "
So sorry to hear of your loss x
Hopefully your sisters are doing better now and the rest of your family is taking the necessary precautions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites.
At the start my family took a flippant view on it, my cousin died of covid at 38, 2 of my sisters had it one in hospital for 5 weeks the other bed ridden for 3 weeks, all for the sake of a family bbq.
So sorry to hear of your loss x
Hopefully your sisters are doing better now and the rest of your family is taking the necessary precautions "
Thank you. There both ok. One better than the other but ok. Think a hard lesson was learned through stupidity. |
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites.
At the start my family took a flippant view on it, my cousin died of covid at 38, 2 of my sisters had it one in hospital for 5 weeks the other bed ridden for 3 weeks, all for the sake of a family bbq.
So sorry to hear of your loss x
Hopefully your sisters are doing better now and the rest of your family is taking the necessary precautions
Thank you. There both ok. One better than the other but ok. Think a hard lesson was learned through stupidity. "
In fairness I think a lot of us didn't take this seriously at the start. Seems like every year some virus mutates in the world and a pandemic is forecasted but never materialises: wolf was cried too often. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I live with my parents and my brother has been asking to come over with his 2yo daughter since last Sunday. My mum has been on board since apparently Dominic Raab has said something about grandparents being able to see their grandkids (which I'm calling bullshit on as nothing has been officially announced). Today my brother finally found an excuse to come over in that he wanted to drop off some veg from his garden that was going to waste. I told my parents I strongly disagreed with letting him into the house, especially as they had been ripping into my brother in law's parents when my sister told us she was suspicious of him entering his parents' home when he's been dropping off shopping. He is currently in our house and everyone is acting like this is completely okay... Considering my mum is extremely vulnerable and has been told by the NHS to not leave the house or come into contact with people outside the household under any circumstance. I'm absolutely raging; I live here too and my feelings have been completely ignored. Prior to this they had been making comments about neighbours breaking the rules and how selfish they were being. Absolute hypocrites.
At the start my family took a flippant view on it, my cousin died of covid at 38, 2 of my sisters had it one in hospital for 5 weeks the other bed ridden for 3 weeks, all for the sake of a family bbq.
So sorry to hear of your loss x
Hopefully your sisters are doing better now and the rest of your family is taking the necessary precautions
Thank you. There both ok. One better than the other but ok. Think a hard lesson was learned through stupidity.
In fairness I think a lot of us didn't take this seriously at the start. Seems like every year some virus mutates in the world and a pandemic is forecasted but never materialises: wolf was cried too often."
I very much agree with this. No-one I know took it seriously even in March. It was something happening in China, nothing for us to worry about. They were overreacting.
A week later we were in lockdown and it was all very real. Quite a shock.
It becomes even more real when you know people with it who are seriously ill. |
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