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Question to ladies
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me."
Fair enough. I completely respect that |
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me."
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer."
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi. |
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi. "
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me."
This is how I feel about it too |
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi.
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why."
It’s because of aids and hiv doubt you will get anyone admit that on here.
I had an argument with a bi female friend about this. She found out an ex partner of mine was bi. Said I was disgusting an we was both dirty.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi.
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why.
It’s because of aids and hiv doubt you will get anyone admit that on here.
I had an argument with a bi female friend about this. She found out an ex partner of mine was bi. Said I was disgusting an we was both dirty. "
You may just have hit the nail on the head. Crazy...safe sex should be a given these days regardless of sexuality. Certainly always has been here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Double standards also, because women who are bi or straight couples saying they won't meet bi guys. saying they don't like it yet female bi no one blinks an eye at it |
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I think in general though that alot more men are a turned on by two women playing together than women are by men playing together, there are exceptions obviously but in general. So I can understand if some women are put off for that reason, if it's not their thing it's not their thing |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi.
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why.
It’s because of aids and hiv doubt you will get anyone admit that on here.
I had an argument with a bi female friend about this. She found out an ex partner of mine was bi. Said I was disgusting an we was both dirty. "
That is part of it, but it's also years of homophobic patriarchal thinking...
I have heard women say it makes someone "less of a man", if that alone doesn't show you know shitty toxic 'masculinity' is nothing will.
Less of a man indeed.
*Waves* bisexual, well pansexual, none homophobic woman here.
I am attracted to people regardless of genitalia, gender, or sexuality. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle |
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Sorry to sort of hijack this thread a little but what if that bi male was also a crossdresser too or is that seen as another thing entirely?
Myself I only dress for nights out which is not that often at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me."
Honestly wonder if that's the reason you stopped speaking to me all of a sudden. Lot of people think I'm gay or atleast bi even though nope I'm not. It was honestly such a shame to me when that hapoened as we had spent spent a lit of time talking and planning things i do wonder now i have seen this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer."
Not at all, no. If they didn't like bi women I'd be fine with that, same for lesbian women. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
Honestly wonder if that's the reason you stopped speaking to me all of a sudden. Lot of people think I'm gay or atleast bi even though nope I'm not. It was honestly such a shame to me when that hapoened as we had spent spent a lit of time talking and planning things i do wonder now i have seen this. "
No, your profile says your straight and I'm sure that's true. I just changed my mind about wanting to meet you. That's totally allowed and I don't really think it's fair of you to bring it up in a public forum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not at all. Bi Guys are SO much more fun. "
 I have noticed from my previous experience that bi guys tend to be much more relaxed when it comes to sexuality. And more open-minded all together. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this "
I feel the same way.
It is hard to explain - I think it has a lot to do with masculinity.
For me it's a feeling rather than a solid reason.
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this "
I was talking about this the other day. I wonder if it's to do with the perceived gender roles regarding men and women; during hetero sex women are penetrated, if a man is penetrated by another man, then he's perceived as having female characteristics possibly. I'm wondering if that gets conflated in a persons mind and that's why some consider bi men as less 'manly'. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi.
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why.
It’s because of aids and hiv doubt you will get anyone admit that on here.
I had an argument with a bi female friend about this. She found out an ex partner of mine was bi. Said I was disgusting an we was both dirty. "
Misinformation ftw.
There is a HUGE stigma still surrounding male bisexuality, I won't go into it here but the belief that we're dirty or higher risk is misinterpreted. Yes, bi guys are in a higher risk category of catching STI's, that same category also includes swingers and sexually promiscuous singles.
The simple fact is, from a medical point of view, anyone who engages with multiple partners *is* at higher risk.
The vast majority of bi guys value their health very highly, just the same as everyone else.
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this "
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society . |
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society . "
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys. "
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past. |
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle "
With blood donation the rules were changed a little in 2017. Men who have oral or anal sex with another man are able to donate blood 3 months after their last sexual encounter. So this may not be an issue, with all bi men. |
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle
With blood donation the rules were changed a little in 2017. Men who have oral or anal sex with another man are able to donate blood 3 months after their last sexual encounter. So this may not be an issue, with all bi men."
And it’s only openly bi and gay men that follow the rules. There’s plenty of people that do donate blood that don’t disclose their sexual past. And you can’t test for being bi or gay. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society . "
You're putting words into my mouth. "Perceived masculinity" isn't homophobic. Neither is being straight. |
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle
With blood donation the rules were changed a little in 2017. Men who have oral or anal sex with another man are able to donate blood 3 months after their last sexual encounter. So this may not be an issue, with all bi men.
And it’s only openly bi and gay men that follow the rules. There’s plenty of people that do donate blood that don’t disclose their sexual past. And you can’t test for being bi or gay. "
Exactly it's not different to having to wait after a new tattoo or piercing. |
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By *rMrsRichCouple
over a year ago
Bournemouh |
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else."
No my fella is bi. They’re the only single guys we talk to!! |
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society .
You're putting words into my mouth. "Perceived masculinity" isn't homophobic. Neither is being straight. "
“Your preference is for very masculine men so you steer away from bi men”
Everyone has their preferences and it’s fine that you are not looking for them. But the words you used are based on a stereotype. Where in the real world bi and gay men have a wide spectrum of masculinity. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle "
That's not a valid reason. Blood gets tested at the same time you give it. You shouldn't worry about that as every time you give blood if something is found in it it wil be discarded.
Not meeting bi people because you give blood makes no sense. Different thing would be that you don't meet them because you don't want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society .
You're putting words into my mouth. "Perceived masculinity" isn't homophobic. Neither is being straight.
“Your preference is for very masculine men so you steer away from bi men”
Everyone has their preferences and it’s fine that you are not looking for them. But the words you used are based on a stereotype. Where in the real world bi and gay men have a wide spectrum of masculinity. "
"Perceived masculinity" is a concept that spans all gender groups, and types of sexuality. If, as you suggest, I'm acting on stereotypes, they're ones based on my experience of my circle of friends and colleagues that includes gay/bi men and women. That circle exists, I assure you, in 'the real world'. |
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle
That's not a valid reason. Blood gets tested at the same time you give it. You shouldn't worry about that as every time you give blood if something is found in it it wil be discarded.
Not meeting bi people because you give blood makes no sense. Different thing would be that you don't meet them because you don't want."
It’s just a way of saying they don’t meet bi guys. But use a back dated view to justify why. Instead of just saying they want to
The blood donors page now says people who are at risk are in these groups.
lifestyle and sexual activity
travel
illness and medical conditions
getting a tattoo or piercing
endoscopy
It doesn’t point out gay and bi men as an individual group they come under lifestyle and sexual activity(along with swingers and prostitutes).
Travel location is on there , do you check where people have been on holiday? And do you check what illnesses they may have ? Lots of people like tattoos and piercings a very high risk category do you check who did their tattoo ?
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society .
You're putting words into my mouth. "Perceived masculinity" isn't homophobic. Neither is being straight.
“Your preference is for very masculine men so you steer away from bi men”
Everyone has their preferences and it’s fine that you are not looking for them. But the words you used are based on a stereotype. Where in the real world bi and gay men have a wide spectrum of masculinity.
"Perceived masculinity" is a concept that spans all gender groups, and types of sexuality. If, as you suggest, I'm acting on stereotypes, they're ones based on my experience of my circle of friends and colleagues that includes gay/bi men and women. That circle exists, I assure you, in 'the real world'. "
Again that’s fine but not what you put in your post.
Your username suggests that your attracted to intelligent men do you think bi men cant be intelligent ? Or are you only attracted to straight intelligent men? Intelligent men are generally portrayed in films as guys that are are weak and nerdy. Yet you only meet extremely masculine men. So you can see where one statement leads to confusion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it to do with perceived masculinity, perhaps? I've steered clear of bi men but not really analysed the reason why. I think it's because my preference is for very masculine men and a sexual relationship that's D/s. Maybe I need to put more thought into this
So bi men or gay men aren’t as masculine as straight men ? Think that’s part of the homophobic language Stonewall are trying to eradicate from society .
You're putting words into my mouth. "Perceived masculinity" isn't homophobic. Neither is being straight.
“Your preference is for very masculine men so you steer away from bi men”
Everyone has their preferences and it’s fine that you are not looking for them. But the words you used are based on a stereotype. Where in the real world bi and gay men have a wide spectrum of masculinity.
"Perceived masculinity" is a concept that spans all gender groups, and types of sexuality. If, as you suggest, I'm acting on stereotypes, they're ones based on my experience of my circle of friends and colleagues that includes gay/bi men and women. That circle exists, I assure you, in 'the real world'.
Again that’s fine but not what you put in your post.
Your username suggests that your attracted to intelligent men do you think bi men cant be intelligent ? Or are you only attracted to straight intelligent men? Intelligent men are generally portrayed in films as guys that are are weak and nerdy. Yet you only meet extremely masculine men. So you can see where one statement leads to confusion.
"
We watch different films, clearly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Double standards also, because women who are bi or straight couples saying they won't meet bi guys. saying they don't like it yet female bi no one blinks an eye at it"
that's because woman are sexy men are dirty  |
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"Double standards also, because women who are bi or straight couples saying they won't meet bi guys. saying they don't like it yet female bi no one blinks an eye at it that's because woman are sexy men are dirty "
In a fair amount of people’s eyes you are correct |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
"
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"Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
"
No one wants justification of who and why they meet people. Everyone has pretences. It’s normally best people don’t tell others why they meet or don’t meet different groups. But when people openly say they don’t meet people because they aren’t masculine or dirty or avoid any person that has met certain groups it tends to cause friction . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm really shocked by some of the attitudes people still have and their justifications for it.
I celebrate the differences between men and women and love them for it.
Why can't a bi guy be masculine or Dom for that matter.
I've known several bi guys and all of them i would say have been far more vocal in their concern over sexual health than the straight ones ive met.
I don't seek out either because it's not a consideration, i'm far more interested in the person than a label. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I'm really shocked by some of the attitudes people still have and their justifications for it.
I celebrate the differences between men and women and love them for it.
Why can't a bi guy be masculine or Dom for that matter.
I've known several bi guys and all of them i would say have been far more vocal in their concern over sexual health than the straight ones ive met.
I don't seek out either because it's not a consideration, i'm far more interested in the person than a label."
A bi guy can be masculine and dom, I've met many and I am also one of them.
I believe that it's very much about perception and stigma. Preferences are fine but unless a person/people are questioning *why* they have these preferences and what they're based on, then we will continue to have this discussion forever.
The simple fact is that preferences can be and sometimes are based on prejudice and bigotry. Dressing it up in more acceptable language and hiding in semantics is part of the issue. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
But would you expect straight men to meet you after knowing you have been with other women?. This question is not intended to be hurtful im just interested to know the answer.
Good question. I do feel that bisexuality is much wider accepted when it is the female that is bi.
Yes i have noticed this too but never really understood why.
It’s because of aids and hiv doubt you will get anyone admit that on here.
I had an argument with a bi female friend about this. She found out an ex partner of mine was bi. Said I was disgusting an we was both dirty.
Misinformation ftw.
There is a HUGE stigma still surrounding male bisexuality, I won't go into it here but the belief that we're dirty or higher risk is misinterpreted. Yes, bi guys are in a higher risk category of catching STI's, that same category also includes swingers and sexually promiscuous singles.
The simple fact is, from a medical point of view, anyone who engages with multiple partners *is* at higher risk.
The vast majority of bi guys value their health very highly, just the same as everyone else.
"
Exactly this. No one ever truly knows another person’s sexual history whatever their gender/sexuality is. It infuriates me when straight people take the moral high ground on this subject.
V |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
No one wants justification of who and why they meet people. Everyone has pretences. It’s normally best people don’t tell others why they meet or don’t meet different groups. But when people openly say they don’t meet people because they aren’t masculine or dirty or avoid any person that has met certain groups it tends to cause friction . "
beards and boobs.... you have made some very valid points on this thread. Thank you!
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
No one wants justification of who and why they meet people. Everyone has pretences. It’s normally best people don’t tell others why they meet or don’t meet different groups. But when people openly say they don’t meet people because they aren’t masculine or dirty or avoid any person that has met certain groups it tends to cause friction . "
Except there is a world of difference between saying you only find a certain body type attractive and saying that you don't find bisexual men attractive because they 'aren't masculine'.
One is a preference, the other is a stereotype, and stereotypes are based in prejudice. |
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By *onyMad123Couple
over a year ago
nottingham/ derby |
Our Personal preference is only for straight guys, doesn't make us a bad people, same as personal preference for white males, I think you are fully entitled to a personal preference when it's something so intimate to choose, also we like people that are interesting, and can hold a conversation. I'm totally honest with my preferences, after all you dont eat a meal you dislike, and this type of life is a choice not a nessecity. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Our Personal preference is only for straight guys, doesn't make us a bad people, same as personal preference for white males, I think you are fully entitled to a personal preference when it's something so intimate to choose, also we like people that are interesting, and can hold a conversation. I'm totally honest with my preferences, after all you dont eat a meal you dislike, and this type of life is a choice not a nessecity. "
No one is saying that you have to meet anyone that you don't want to, in that sense, preference is 'sacred'. I do also think that people should know why they have those preferences and if they're based on stereotypes or prejudice then it becomes hard to defend those preferences. |
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By *onyMad123Couple
over a year ago
nottingham/ derby |
That's like vegans and vegetarians explaining their choices, I know what I like and don't like, not based on stereotypes or predujice but the same reason a man may not like me as I'm fat, that's a choice. It's getting far complicated, why does someone eat meat, why do some not, why do people like certain sexual acts and others not, its about the right to choose, without being judged for being choosy. |
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What I don't understand but maybe it's because I'm simple. But I don't see profiles saying no bi women, or on the forum threads. Why is it that there is such a difference between how bi women and men perceived?
On this thread the ideas that bi men can't be a Dom, or that it has a major impact on blood donation have been debunked. Health risks a bi man whose come out of a stable long term relationship Vs a man who has been single and playing the field. Who is more a risk to your health?
I understand preferences but I don't understand why being bi is such a no go area? |
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"That's like vegans and vegetarians explaining their choices, I know what I like and don't like, not based on stereotypes or predujice but the same reason a man may not like me as I'm fat, that's a choice. It's getting far complicated, why does someone eat meat, why do some not, why do people like certain sexual acts and others not, its about the right to choose, without being judged for being choosy. "
No one cares what your choice may be. If you want to meet someone or not meet someone is your own business. But people who give a negative generalisation about people or a certain group is wrong. If you don’t meet bi people that’s great 99% of the population probably don’t. But don’t then say because they carry diseases or because they aren’t man enough. |
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"What I don't understand but maybe it's because I'm simple. But I don't see profiles saying no bi women, or on the forum threads. Why is it that there is such a difference between how bi women and men perceived?
On this thread the ideas that bi men can't be a Dom, or that it has a major impact on blood donation have been debunked. Health risks a bi man whose come out of a stable long term relationship Vs a man who has been single and playing the field. Who is more a risk to your health?
I understand preferences but I don't understand why being bi is such a no go area?"
It’s because people believe bi men are at risk (and yes some are ) bi women don’t tend to have penetrative sex with each other so less risk. Although lots do use strap ons and dildos on each other. And who knows how they have been used before . You never see the double ended dildos on pics with condoms on them. Everyone takes a risk when having sex regardless of gender, sexuality or ethnic back ground . As long as you take your own precautions that meet your own requirements then you can’t lay blame elsewhere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wonder if there's also maybe a subconscious feeling of increased competition? I know it doesn't apply to this site and what people on here are looking for, but I know if I were dating a bi guy I wouldn't just worry about him looking at other women but men too, which increases the competition by 50% if that makes sense? |
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"I wonder if there's also maybe a subconscious feeling of increased competition? I know it doesn't apply to this site and what people on here are looking for, but I know if I were dating a bi guy I wouldn't just worry about him looking at other women but men too, which increases the competition by 50% if that makes sense? "
When I'm in love with someone, nobody else is my OH competition. I maybe bi but my head turns a lot less than some of my straight friends. Some people look more than others it's nothing to to do with sexual orientation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder if there's also maybe a subconscious feeling of increased competition? I know it doesn't apply to this site and what people on here are looking for, but I know if I were dating a bi guy I wouldn't just worry about him looking at other women but men too, which increases the competition by 50% if that makes sense?
When I'm in love with someone, nobody else is my OH competition. I maybe bi but my head turns a lot less than some of my straight friends. Some people look more than others it's nothing to to do with sexual orientation "
Yeah of course but I just meant from the point of view of someone who is worrying about what their partner is thinking. |
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"I wonder if there's also maybe a subconscious feeling of increased competition? I know it doesn't apply to this site and what people on here are looking for, but I know if I were dating a bi guy I wouldn't just worry about him looking at other women but men too, which increases the competition by 50% if that makes sense?
When I'm in love with someone, nobody else is my OH competition. I maybe bi but my head turns a lot less than some of my straight friends. Some people look more than others it's nothing to to do with sexual orientation
Yeah of course but I just meant from the point of view of someone who is worrying about what their partner is thinking. "
Comes down to communication, same as any other relationship x |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Being bi does not equate to being promiscuous or sexually irresponsible.
Ask the many desperate straight guys that contact bi guys looking to hook up."
Agreed, or the straight guys who meet TV/TS.
All the stigma does is lead people to lie and to hide their sexuality in the hope that it will increase their chances with others who only meet straight people.
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"Why can't we all fancy who we fancy without people telling us it's wrong?
I dont get upset when people dont fancy me because I'm fat or black - I'm not calling anyone a racist fat hater!
I don't fancy Bi men and I dont see why I have to justify it to people that clearly want an argument.
"
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Whilst I don't disagree that for *some* of those that stipulate "no bi men" that the reasons may be based in ignorance, bigotry or stigma - I'm not sure the perception that people who won't meet bi men are in the majority is correct, in fact in my experience far more people are either actively looking for bi men, or not bothered either way, than won't meet us.
It's just because those that won't tend to stipulate it that it *seems* they are in a majority |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else."
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men."
And yet Swingers are placed in exactly the same risk category for STI/HIV as bi men, along with the younger age group...and here you are  |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men."
Might want to check a few of your verifications |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men."
https://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=117499# |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men."
this is so ignorant , maybe do some research |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men.this is so ignorant , maybe do some research "
Very, especially as their green arrow suggests they love random bareback with other couples so not overly concerned about transmitting diseases. |
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Not fancying "bi guys" is a bit odd - how on earth do you know? You'd not know either of us were - and indeed none of our normal friends have a clue.
Its not like their colour, build, size fitness or manhood or other physical or even mental characteristic you like or not.
Judging by how many "straight" guys message us, tell us they are bi, and give us their fab-guys profile ID is amazing - and the reason is to get to play with people who they would otherwise block.
Don't get us wrong, if you look around fabguys there is a lot to put you off bi men!!! (bareback is an activity filter for instance). But we, as a bi couple, use it to filter to our taste as well! Not all bi people are skanky! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men.this is so ignorant , maybe do some research
Very, especially as their green arrow suggests they love random bareback with other couples so not overly concerned about transmitting diseases. "
Got to love the green arrow  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's so bizarre that so many people get offended by what other people find sexually appealing.
You'll find no judgement from me.
I know who and what I find attractive - why is that wrong?
None of it is based on any phobic tendencies.
I had a relationship with a woman for 3yrs - I experiencedr hatred and homophobia- it's not just restricted to men.
Why is it wrong that I want to fuck heterosexual men?
We are all on Fab to fulfill our fantasies and I'm bored of being told off for what I find attractive.
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"It's so bizarre that so many people get offended by what other people find sexually appealing.
You'll find no judgement from me.
I know who and what I find attractive - why is that wrong?
None of it is based on any phobic tendencies.
I had a relationship with a woman for 3yrs - I experiencedr hatred and homophobia- it's not just restricted to men.
Why is it wrong that I want to fuck heterosexual men?
We are all on Fab to fulfill our fantasies and I'm bored of being told off for what I find attractive.
"
Show me one comment where someone has said it’s wrong to only fancy heterosexual men. There is none.
Not fancying or wanting to meet bi and gay men is completely different to homophobia. |
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By *onyMad123Couple
over a year ago
nottingham/ derby |
I'm not offended, I have gay and bisexual friends of birth sexes, far from homophobic or racist, just my personal choice, end of and we are all entitled to have that choice, after all its a enhancement not a nessecity, would you eat food or drive a car you weren't keen on, same goes for my preference, doesn't mean because your a white straight male, your in, absolutely not, many more things that makes a person appealing. |
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How in the living hell has this got shit all to do with this imaginary patriarchy?
You’ve been watching too many social media posts or YouTube videos.
It has zero to do with patriarchy and is entirely related to two women having views that are out dated and somewhat homophobic. But nothing to do with a patriarchy. Men literally get blamed for shit constantly these days. |
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Btw, I didn’t say those women were homophobic. They said they didn’t want a man who’s gone with other men. But there was no reason, thus, the comments come off that way is what I meant. Clarifying. But ... either way, patriarchy? Lol |
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"It's so bizarre that so many people get offended by what other people find sexually appealing.
You'll find no judgement from me.
I know who and what I find attractive - why is that wrong?
None of it is based on any phobic tendencies.
I had a relationship with a woman for 3yrs - I experiencedr hatred and homophobia- it's not just restricted to men.
Why is it wrong that I want to fuck heterosexual men?
We are all on Fab to fulfill our fantasies and I'm bored of being told off for what I find attractive.
"
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Speaking as a bisexual man I have absolutely no problem with people who prefer not to meet me because of my sexuality - it's their preference just the same as those that rule me out because they don't find me attractive, prefer someone who has stamina or any one of the other myriad reasons they might choose not to meet me - it's unlikely we'd find a connection and chemistry anyway.
What I *do* have a problem with is when the reason for that preference is expressed in bigoted or ignorant terms - but simply stating "no bi guys" on a profile doesn't fall into that category in itself, so doesn't bother me in the slightest.
As I said further up, the number of people that *will* meet bi guys is far greater than those that won't - there's just a perception that more people won't because it stands out on a profile when it's stated (whereas those that will meet us don't often state it overtly)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder if there's also maybe a subconscious feeling of increased competition? I know it doesn't apply to this site and what people on here are looking for, but I know if I were dating a bi guy I wouldn't just worry about him looking at other women but men too, which increases the competition by 50% if that makes sense? "
There is always that feeling when you know the person is attracted to both males and females but it also works both ways.
The bonus is that it presents a whole lot more opportunities when you’re together
V |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men.this is so ignorant , maybe do some research "
Outstandingly ignorant.
People in glass houses....
V |
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men.this is so ignorant , maybe do some research
Outstandingly ignorant.
People in glass houses....
V"
Funny thing is one of their “straight” verifications messaged us as we had looked at their profile and clicked on their verifications and he said he loves sucking cock and wanted to meet us and he also said he indulges in bareback sex.
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Preference and prejudice are too totally different things.
Preference
I don’t meet bi guys
I don’t meet black guys
I don’t fancy gay guys
I don’t want to meet vegans
I don’t like fat girls
Prejudice
I don’t meet bi guys as they aren’t masculine
I don’t meet Asian guys as they have small dicks
I don’t meet gay guys as they will give me aids
There’s also Ignorance , “I won’t meet any one that’s met bi guys”. You have no idea who anyone has met. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally yes, if I was looking to meet men, I'd avoid those I knew were bi.
I just don't like the idea of being with a man who has been with other men. It's not for me.
Honestly wonder if that's the reason you stopped speaking to me all of a sudden. Lot of people think I'm gay or atleast bi even though nope I'm not. It was honestly such a shame to me when that hapoened as we had spent spent a lit of time talking and planning things i do wonder now i have seen this. "
Erm you messaged me a while back?? |
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By *ucidityWoman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else."
Not at all, I love bi men! Generally, they’re my preference as there are more play possibilities. I find it a huge turn on to watch men play together.
Maybe identifying as bi myself influences how I feel.
I really struggle with the implication that bi identifying men are somehow less masculine...to date, the bi men I have met have been incredibly stereotypically ‘masculine’ but my opinions on what society considers to be and not to be masculine and the impact that has on men is probably meant for some other place.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else.
Bi men are a much higher HIV and aids risk than straight guys. That’s why we will not meet bi men.this is so ignorant , maybe do some research
Outstandingly ignorant.
People in glass houses....
V
Funny thing is one of their “straight” verifications messaged us as we had looked at their profile and clicked on their verifications and he said he loves sucking cock and wanted to meet us and he also said he indulges in bareback sex.
"
The hypocrisy on this site sickens me.
If people have to lie about their sexual preferences on a swingers site then I dread to think about their dishonesty in real life.
As I said earlier, no one knows anyone’s sexual history on here 100% but those that sit in moral judgment on others need to take a good look at themselves first
V x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t like the act of men having sex with men.
For the record, I like gay men, gay women, bi men, bi women, straight men, straight women, TVs, ts, cd. I like people - doesn’t matter what race, gender, sexuality they are. In the real world, I like everyone!
The the bedroom .... straight men, bi women ... lots of bi women.
Just my preference, as everyone has their own. If we all like the same thing, the world would be a very boring place !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past. "
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don’t meet bi guys and we don’t meet straight girls, as a bi female I want to play with a lady in a couple too, no compromise
If I was a bi guy I would want to play with the guy in the couple
We don’t compromise, we don’t expect others too xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not at all! If discussions are had and boundaries are set so all are comfortable I don't see why your sexuality should be an issue. Mr is straight and quite comfortable in himself around other men, just because you fancy other men doesn't mean you're going to pounce on every bloke in penis range. I do so hate that sterotype. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"We don’t meet bi guys and we don’t meet straight girls, as a bi female I want to play with a lady in a couple too, no compromise
If I was a bi guy I would want to play with the guy in the couple
We don’t compromise, we don’t expect others too xx"
Your choice and preference of course and that is to be respected - but interesting that you are inferring that bi guys are somehow "compromising" if they meet someone who is straight, whether that be a single lady, or a couple where the male half is straight.
I don't see it as compromising at all - my sexuality has wide and varied tastes which are catered to in different ways and my bisexual side is not a "must have" - I've been involved in MFM's and MFMF's and similar where I've had a fantastic time and the thought of the other guys cock hasn't crossed my mind in the slightest.
I just see my sexuality as a smorgasbord from which I may select different things each time I visit it.
As I said, not arguing with your preference or disagreeing with it in any way whatsoever just found the point about "compromising" an interesting one to expand on. |
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry "
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all "
You are soooo upset by my comment  |
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment "
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ? "
Preferences.. Thought you called it ignorance? |
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ?
Preferences.. Thought you called it ignorance? "
Preference - we don’t meet bi guys
Ignorance - we don’t meet anyone that meets bi guys.
Thanks for answering the question though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ?
Preferences.. Thought you called it ignorance?
Preference - we don’t meet bi guys
Ignorance - we don’t meet anyone that meets bi guys.
Thanks for answering the question though "
Sorry you're sad and unhappy with other people's preferences, ohh dam I mean ignorance! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We don’t meet bi guys and we don’t meet straight girls, as a bi female I want to play with a lady in a couple too, no compromise
If I was a bi guy I would want to play with the guy in the couple
We don’t compromise, we don’t expect others too xx
Your choice and preference of course and that is to be respected - but interesting that you are inferring that bi guys are somehow "compromising" if they meet someone who is straight, whether that be a single lady, or a couple where the male half is straight.
I don't see it as compromising at all - my sexuality has wide and varied tastes which are catered to in different ways and my bisexual side is not a "must have" - I've been involved in MFM's and MFMF's and similar where I've had a fantastic time and the thought of the other guys cock hasn't crossed my mind in the slightest.
I just see my sexuality as a smorgasbord from which I may select different things each time I visit it.
As I said, not arguing with your preference or disagreeing with it in any way whatsoever just found the point about "compromising" an interesting one to expand on."
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ?
Preferences.. Thought you called it ignorance?
Preference - we don’t meet bi guys
Ignorance - we don’t meet anyone that meets bi guys.
Thanks for answering the question though
Sorry you're sad and unhappy with other people's preferences, ohh dam I mean ignorance! "
Ok mate enjoy your trolling . Would have been nice if you had added something to the debate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We dont see by guys or any one that has veris from bi guys.
Let’s hope that none of them have met any away from this site. You have no idea anyone’s sexual past. And flicking through your veris 2 of them have sent us winks in the past.
Jeeze.. I'm concerned about you, you're ever so angry
Not angry at all mate, just pointing out you post was bollocks that’s all
You are soooo upset by my comment
No upset here. Everyone has preferences.
Out of interest how do police who others have met ?
Preferences.. Thought you called it ignorance?
Preference - we don’t meet bi guys
Ignorance - we don’t meet anyone that meets bi guys.
Thanks for answering the question though
Sorry you're sad and unhappy with other people's preferences, ohh dam I mean ignorance!
Ok mate enjoy your trolling . Would have been nice if you had added something to the debate. "
Why are you so argumentative? You dont seem like very nice person |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else."
I'm not put off by bi men as long as they are happy to play straight with us, as guy on guy is a real turn off for both of us. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you get put off by a man being bi?
I am proudly bi but I notice, on here more than at clubs, women tend to stipulate 'no bi men'.
Intrigued what it is that turns you off? Just to help understanding nothing else."
I love bi men... I am a bi female... Get the best of all worlds  |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"How in the living hell has this got shit all to do with this imaginary patriarchy?
You’ve been watching too many social media posts or YouTube videos.
It has zero to do with patriarchy and is entirely related to two women having views that are out dated and somewhat homophobic. But nothing to do with a patriarchy. Men literally get blamed for shit constantly these days."
I'm assuming that was aimed at my comments...
I can point to not just my thesis but several others that talk about the effects on historical patriarchal thinking and how it affects society and societal constructs.
Those outdated and homophobic views? Where do you think they come from?
Regardless of whether you like it or not we live in a society that has been based on patriarchal thinking, it also, in the case of the UK, has a healthy smattering of Victorian moral "values" .
All these have a negative impact on men and women... Thoughts and attitudes have changed and are changing.
I'm not 'blamimg men' when I talk about historical fact. You can talk about how there are still long lasting impacts from racial segregation, I'm not 'blaming whites' when I do that, I'm talking about the past and hopefully contributing to changing attitudes in the future.
Denying the truth of how we got to a situation is far more unhealthy and hinders growth. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle
With blood donation the rules were changed a little in 2017. Men who have oral or anal sex with another man are able to donate blood 3 months after their last sexual encounter. So this may not be an issue, with all bi men."
That’s true but if I get talking to a bi man I don’t plan to ask him when his last encounter with a male was or what they got up to.
If I only meet straight men I can avoid those questions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t meet a bi man. But that’s due to me giving blood and the restrictions they put on who you’ve had sex with.
Bi wouldn’t fit in with my lifestyle
With blood donation the rules were changed a little in 2017. Men who have oral or anal sex with another man are able to donate blood 3 months after their last sexual encounter. So this may not be an issue, with all bi men.
That’s true but if I get talking to a bi man I don’t plan to ask him when his last encounter with a male was or what they got up to.
If I only meet straight men I can avoid those questions "
Assuming all the straight men you meet are actually straight and not just saying that as they are in the closet.
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