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Couples who look for single guys.....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
Wevee given up waiting for people who find us interesting then turn out to be interesting themselves...
The hunted shall become the hunter haha.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well when couples keep letting you down i suppose you loose heart |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a couples profile aswell and i am shocked by the abuse and assumptions single fellas make |
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"I have a couples profile aswell and i am shocked by the abuse and assumptions single fellas make "
totally agree, have a singles profile and I would never behave in the way that some single fellas do on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes! Guys would save a lot of time wasted if they read ur profile. Not tarring all with the same brush but the ones who msg again and again, plz just take a no reply as a polite no |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
Am shocked that guys to this?! |
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By *hav02Man
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
Even I get "fancy a suck" messages from random guys. I've started replying with a canned copy/paste response  
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There are decent guys around, but on here it's a numbers game to find the diamond among the rough. Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And the old “i cant send face pics because.....” honestly do guys really think people will turn up and meet a complete stranger without even knowing what they look like, so so many sad reasons to question whether decent and genuine exist any more, we know they do but they are in a very very small minority, needle and haystack come to mind |
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We are pretty new to it all but Mrs has been on before and we just cant find a guy to suit us. We took a break over the holidays and have come back to have another go but have had similar experiences to you all so far. Either zero effort, want to meet this second or have even tried to flirt with Mrs alone. It's a shame as it's something we both want to try! |
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Christ! I hope people think I’ve put sone bloody effort into my profile!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We are pretty new to it all but Mrs has been on before and we just cant find a guy to suit us. We took a break over the holidays and have come back to have another go but have had similar experiences to you all so far. Either zero effort, want to meet this second or have even tried to flirt with Mrs alone. It's a shame as it's something we both want to try!"
Exactly the same for us, its so sad |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Single looking for a couple.. any takers |
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Whenever I’ve met couples it’s gone really well tbf, usually good communication, pics exchanged and a mutually convenient time to meet
There’s a lot of wind up merchants and especially fantasists on fab but it does go well at times as well |
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"Whenever I’ve met couples it’s gone really well tbf, usually good communication, pics exchanged and a mutually convenient time to meet
There’s a lot of wind up merchants and especially fantasists on fab but it does go well at times as well"
The good communication bit is something we have seriously struggled with, we often cant meet this second and the minute you say it wont be for a week or two that's it, interest totally gone. Affected my confidence a bit to be fair so still pondering going a different route with it all. |
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"And the old “i cant send face pics because.....” honestly do guys really think people will turn up and meet a complete stranger without even knowing what they look like, so so many sad reasons to question whether decent and genuine exist any more, we know they do but they are in a very very small minority, needle and haystack come to mind"
There is absolutely no reason for not sending a pic in a message you can do direct from phone and there is no one I know who dont have a pic of themselves on phone you can even take an instant pic ... xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The good communication bit is something we have seriously struggled with, we often cant meet this second and the minute you say it wont be for a week or two that's it, interest totally gone. Affected my confidence a bit to be fair so still pondering going a different route with it all."
Same for us too this seems to have turned from a swinging fun site to a fancy a shag now site, communication and connection is huge for us and without it we wont meet |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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There is absolutely no reason for not sending a pic in a message you can do direct from phone and there is no one I know who dont have a pic of themselves on phone you can even take an instant pic ... xx"
^^^^^ this |
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"Same for us too this seems to have turned from a swinging fun site to a fancy a shag now site, communication and connection is huge for us and without it we wont meet"
Totally this. We want to share the awesome fun we have with someone we get on with and enjoy being around, that way we can all be happy, comfortable and have loads of fun! I'm not looking for a rent-a-cock personally. |
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The site does have alot of fantasists and time wasters, makes it a very difficult site for the genuine folk. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Totally this. We want to share the awesome fun we have with someone we get on with and enjoy being around, that way we can all be happy, comfortable and have loads of fun! I'm not looking for a rent-a-cock personally."
Sound like our doppelgängers lol |
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I see you have put a lot of effort in.. I too have put effort in, and mostly I get ... “do you fancy a suck”” that states they have not read my profile...
And number 2 most of the “couples” profiles on here are single males. I have called them out so many times, and heard all the excuses..
So yes there are genuine males on here, however a lot of chancers and single males parading are being in a couple.. |
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By *ifty69Man
over a year ago
north tyneside |
In have messaged couples and they don’t even have the decency to reply  |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
We’ve noticed this to. We gave up around a year ago with all the sites we use. We do plan to try again soon but will most likely do our own searching and messaging.
However, I have noticed by viewing the local updates regularly that at least 90% of the profiles are minimal in content to warrant us messaging them but I’m sure we’ll find someone eventually but accept it will take time. We certainly do not want to rely on guys inboxing us.
Speaking with another couple they advised perhaps focusing on guys who have left great (non-graphic) verifications on other Couples profiles who seek single guys. |
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"In have messaged couples and they don’t even have the decency to reply "
That generally means you are not what they looking for so it's a polite no thanks without getting into a debate about why you are not what they want |
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So many timewasters or picture hunters have appeared in the last year.
Or people pretending to be bi or in a couple etc
One guy couldn’t accept no for an answer and got our old account removed with no help from admin and completely ruined our evening.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"In have messaged couples and they don’t even have the decency to reply "
Also do you realise just HOW MANY messages couples get daily? This is why sometimes we don't reply because if your not what we are looking for we would spend a whole day replying, hence if you read our profile it does say if we don't reply then thats the reason |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So many timewasters or picture hunters have appeared in the last year.
Or people pretending to be bi or in a couple etc
One guy couldn’t accept no for an answer and got our old account removed with no help from admin and completely ruined our evening.
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This is why we posted this thread it never used to be like this from when was on before |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested?
We’ve noticed this to. We gave up around a year ago with all the sites we use. We do plan to try again soon but will most likely do our own searching and messaging.
However, I have noticed by viewing the local updates regularly that at least 90% of the profiles are minimal in content to warrant us messaging them but I’m sure we’ll find someone eventually but accept it will take time. We certainly do not want to rely on guys inboxing us.
Speaking with another couple they advised perhaps focusing on guys who have left great (non-graphic) verifications on other Couples profiles who seek single guys. "
The verification rabbit hole is actually a really good doorway to finding some lovely genuine people on Fab. There's no guarantee of course, but it's a good start for a lot of people  |
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Sadly unverified ourselves, hence aiming for a social asap to let people know we are genuine... but totally understand the issue. As the female in the couple people rarely expect to be talking to me. |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested?
We’ve noticed this to. We gave up around a year ago with all the sites we use. We do plan to try again soon but will most likely do our own searching and messaging.
However, I have noticed by viewing the local updates regularly that at least 90% of the profiles are minimal in content to warrant us messaging them but I’m sure we’ll find someone eventually but accept it will take time. We certainly do not want to rely on guys inboxing us.
Speaking with another couple they advised perhaps focusing on guys who have left great (non-graphic) verifications on other Couples profiles who seek single guys.
The verification rabbit hole is actually a really good doorway to finding some lovely genuine people on Fab. There's no guarantee of course, but it's a good start for a lot of people "
The verification thing is a big thing for me - and that is speaking as single guy looking for couples. Whencouple/single guys has several verifications - then at least you know they are real/turn up and at least a few people can independently verify them.
Even, I, as single guy, once in while get someone email me! More often than one - its someone with no verifications - that means they are not real. |
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Sadly, it's become the norm for single guys to make as minimal an effort as possible but expect so much in return. Their profiles have very little text, they don't read others profiles themselves and they have too many cock shots. Don't get us wrong, we like a good looking cock and even better to play with it but only cock shots are boring.
Their messages, should they bother, are if the outstandingly erudite form of
What are you doing now?
Fancy chatting to me?
Want to meet?
Etc etc etc
We've actually changed our profile text because of it. Noone reads them anyway so why bother with prose about what/who'd we would like to meet  .
Mind you, couples are getting bad too but not as bad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sadly ive noticed a lot more of people exlecting a meet straight away or your labeled as a time waster, anyone else noticed this |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sadly ive noticed a lot more of people exlecting a meet straight away or your labeled as a time waster, anyone else noticed this"
Mostly single males yes rarely couples in our experience |
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"The verification thing is a big thing for me - and that is speaking as single guy looking for couples. Whencouple/single guys has several verifications - then at least you know they are real/turn up and at least a few people can independently verify them.
Even, I, as single guy, once in while get someone email me! More often than one - its someone with no verifications - that means they are not real. "
Not always, we are very much real just havent had the opportunity or the spark with someone to meet them yet! But I do understand what you mean, we must figure out a way to get verified soon and hopefully we have more luck... |
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By *-and-aCouple
over a year ago
Closer than you think |
"The verification thing is a big thing for me - and that is speaking as single guy looking for couples. Whencouple/single guys has several verifications - then at least you know they are real/turn up and at least a few people can independently verify them.
Even, I, as single guy, once in while get someone email me! More often than one - its someone with no verifications - that means they are not real.
Not always, we are very much real just havent had the opportunity or the spark with someone to meet them yet! But I do understand what you mean, we must figure out a way to get verified soon and hopefully we have more luck..."
Go in the chat room together and speak to some verified cpls, doesn’t have to be “sex cam” just proves your both there, both real and you can be seen to both be involved. That will break the verification challenge really quick and easy..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hardly contact couples because quite a lot of them state on their profiles that they aren't looking for single guys.
To be honest a lot say they'll find single guys they are interested in and a few have contacted me and it's been great so far.
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"The verification thing is a big thing for me - and that is speaking as single guy looking for couples. Whencouple/single guys has several verifications - then at least you know they are real/turn up and at least a few people can independently verify them.
Even, I, as single guy, once in while get someone email me! More often than one - its someone with no verifications - that means they are not real.
Not always, we are very much real just havent had the opportunity or the spark with someone to meet them yet! But I do understand what you mean, we must figure out a way to get verified soon and hopefully we have more luck...
Go in the chat room together and speak to some verified cpls, doesn’t have to be “sex cam” just proves your both there, both real and you can be seen to both be involved. That will break the verification challenge really quick and easy..
"
That's a great idea, thank you so much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are on here as a couple ( not bi) just looking for single men as I’m no good for a couples meet(floopy) and the main problem we find is the problem of not reading our profile.
We are not fuck anything swingers and Carol is a tad fussy as she hasn’t been fucked in over ten years and when a chap can’t even be arsed to read the route map to our sexual souls then why would she reply to their meet tonight or hi message.
In six weeks and over 1500 messages we seem to have maybe four men we may meet for a social which is a pretty poor ratio even for fab!!
Happy hunting one and all.
T |
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lol yes we find the same problems too one word messages ! whats that all about and on that note they want to be friends lol i ask you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I put zero effort in my profile, it made no difference to what it was before when I had spent 45mins writing it up |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Too many guys only message when it's horny time (usually late friday or saturday night lol) not interested in building a connection |
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so it would be helpful if fab admin or (hiarchy ) would get involved and sort it after all they are quick to take your money lol  |
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Funnily enough I have had similar complaints about lads just sending dick pics and "wanna fuck" messages by several females who were shocked I'd read their profiles and wrote more then "sit on my face" so it is a common complaint |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
I think you’ve the wrong people chasing you guys x |
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By *-and-aCouple
over a year ago
Closer than you think |
"lol yes we find the same problems too one word messages ! whats that all about and on that note they want to be friends lol i ask you "
We especially love the “your pics are amazing” messages... we only have a profile pic they can see.... just a 100% cut and paste and not a single word read or minute taken to read our profile... and thats just the “cpls” hahaha |
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I’ve been looking To join a couple for a little while and I’m finding that they are rarer than hens teeth, maybe I’m just looking in the wrong place? |
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This seems to be a sad reality on Fab now. I read lots of couples saying the same.
As a single gent who always reads a profile and sense a meaningful message the problem manifests itself for me in that many of those messages don’t even get read. Couples and ladies seems to be inundated with such nonsense that they don’t get round to reading a message from someone actual trying to connect
Hey ho. Thank goodness for good Fab friends. |
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As a single guy, I’ve found that couples respond well to being approached as such. To the point where I’ve had couples express genuine shock with me asking how they both are and that I’ve offered up photos!! Having had a few meets, I’ve seen some of the stuff some single blokes send and I’ve come to the conclusion they don’t know how many other single fellas are on here and that they think any woman on here must be desperate and an easy shag. It’s absolutely not the case. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a couples profile aswell and i am shocked by the abuse and assumptions single fellas make "
Quite right. I did once have a single female account too, the abuse and expectation that I was there just to 'fuck' them was unreal. They're much more respectful on the couples account, but suppose cos thats because there's another male involved with the fella. |
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We delete more single guys and block constantly due to not being verified on the site or having up-to-date veris,also not having a filled in profile with face pic either in message or pics,we do this as the sites a mine field of weirdo,s and fakes,theme there's the arrogant type who are vulgar and don't address u as a cple thinking there on a dating site with their charm lol,the good respectable men shine on this site and will display that with veris up-to-date with no lengthy gaps inbetween |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's difficult to say the least Finding a decent guy for threesomes, we get some nice messages which is great and some "I really can't be bothered one's"
The abusive messagers just get themselves blocked!
And of course there's the "I enjoy fine wine and fine women" brigade
Yep it's fooking difficult
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Have had to use the block button a lot more regularly recently also. Whats the point in filling out a profile if noone reads it?
I didnt block at the start and the streams of abuse when ive declined was unreal. Ive also lately encountered where ive blocked someone and then a couple mins later i get a message from a diff account with a pile of abuse.
I dread to think how some of these men treat the women in their lives. Granted i know the internet affords annonymity but that doesnt give anyone the right to threaten someone with violence because they said no to a wanna meet message |
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I usually get approached by couples, all I do is behave respectfully and have a laugh! Met some amazing people though! |
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We’ve found the same now. Constant meet now and fancy some fun now messages and the ones we do talk to disappear after 2 days and pop up a verification from a single woman making it look like they just wanted a quick fix and weren’t interested in joining a couple at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure why most of the single fellas wont meet at a club or fab social in order to get verified as geniune. I have been lucky enough to now be part of a couples profile but it has taken 7-8 months of meeting people at clubs to show im a geniune guy |
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I usually meet couples at Club events. I've had a fair few couples who pop up with the Meet now/ Fancy a fuck? Which is pretty disrespectful. They're usually just ignored. |
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We now tell any single guys interested to visit the club we use, the genuine ones actually turn up and get to have some kind of fun a few have come back for more. We have visited a few houses, with guys we have met at club, but will not go to house direct without me checking guy and house out first. That normally gets rid of time wasters or guys that are not single, not saying we don't play with married as some have good reasons, but dont want being disturbed, |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
They are out there,trust us, but unless you bolt your message filters right down you have to wade through a hell of a lot of nonsense to find them. Even then, it doesn’t guarantee anything.
It can get pretty tiresome.
They are out there though |
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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago
folkestone |
There are decent guys out there who will make the effort, but you might have to find them as they are normally quite popular. Before I took a break from swinging 3 years ago, most of my meets would come from recommendations from other couples and couples finding me. Very rarely did I send messages out first as I knew couples were inundated with messages. |
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We invited 2 single guys to join us this afternoon at quest. Awsome |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In our experience, not just guys, but women too. Too many fantasists and large egos, so we are very selective as to who we message. |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
Tell us what you want to hear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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whats good single black male here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
It's hard to find them but they exist. We've found some before we hope to find some again. |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"lol yes we find the same problems too one word messages ! whats that all about and on that note they want to be friends lol i ask you "
Great pictures in your profile |
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested?
Tell us what you want to hear. "
Something that shows you have read our profile, find us interesting and that reflects who you are and what you want. "Hi" or "Meet tonight?" doesnt do that. We try our best to reply to all the messages we get but since we get a lot of those it makes it super hard to get a conversation going. |
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Sadly the idiots mess it up for everyone don't they?
There are some of us genuine guys out there - it's just that the one liners and the "fancy a …." lot outnumber us and end up putting people off.
I'm always amazed if the "fancy a …" works with anyone..? I guess it must if they keep doing it...?
Either way I wish they'd go of and play with themselves rather than playing with other peoples time and efforts. |
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"In our experience, not just guys, but women too. Too many fantasists and large egos, so we are very selective as to who we message."
Absolutely agree - some couples and females are as bad - got abused last week because I'd actually made an effort...! lol |
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We all know there are plenty if idiots and time wasters. Hopefully couples look at veris and the message and can work out who is genuine. Us single guys who like mmf are out there so come and say hello |
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I don’t think my profile is too bad and I do have verifications from couples I have met, but it is becoming annoying when you write a decent length message (not one liners) to couples and you don’t even get a reply.
Hopefully I will get some decent responses soon, well I live in hope anyway lol |
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"Sadly the idiots mess it up for everyone don't they?
There are some of us genuine guys out there - it's just that the one liners and the "fancy a …." lot outnumber us and end up putting people off.
I'm always amazed if the "fancy a …" works with anyone..? I guess it must if they keep doing it...?
Either way I wish they'd go of and play with themselves rather than playing with other peoples time and efforts. "
Nobody is responsible for my success or failure on here but me..... |
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Been on here for a while I’m a mature gent but can’t seem to find a mature couple for friendship / social and soft swing they don’t trust single guys some of us have no choice i was widowed now on my own friendship to me is important they have to be people I can trust |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t think my profile is too bad and I do have verifications from couples I have met, but it is becoming annoying when you write a decent length message (not one liners) to couples and you don’t even get a reply.
Hopefully I will get some decent responses soon, well I live in hope anyway lol"
Totally agree, not all single guys are wasters, I've lost count of the number of couples and single girls I've written to, decent message, pics of me (not cock shots!) ,and not even so much as thanks but no thanks, some even block without reason.
I think Fab on the whole has lost some manners and direction on the whole |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So very true. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well when couples keep letting you down i suppose you loose heart"
This. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t think my profile is too bad and I do have verifications from couples I have met, but it is becoming annoying when you write a decent length message (not one liners) to couples and you don’t even get a reply.
Hopefully I will get some decent responses soon, well I live in hope anyway lol
Totally agree, not all single guys are wasters, I've lost count of the number of couples and single girls I've written to, decent message, pics of me (not cock shots!) ,and not even so much as thanks but no thanks, some even block without reason.
I think Fab on the whole has lost some manners and direction on the whole "
and this |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *atinocoupleCouple
over a year ago
SF, NY, London (in that order) |
99.9% have no game whatsoever. Zero flirting, zero conversation. Most expect face pics and a phone number within 2 messages.
We have played with single guys (albeit at parties) but they put in a little effort and we knew what they were into and how they would play in a group setting.
Most can't do this, which is surprising |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *aughtycp1Couple
over a year ago
Leicestershire |
Persistent guys annoy me a lot. I block them and then they set up another profile thinking they stand a chance. A big NO from me. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"
Tell us what you want to hear. "
Probably what they don't want to hear is a guy just telling them what he thinks they want to hear.
Be honest with what you say, that way you will find people that want the same as you do.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I hardly contact couples because quite a lot of them state on their profiles that they aren't looking for single guys.
To be honest a lot say they'll find single guys they are interested in and a few have contacted me and it's been great so far.
"
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
We welcome single males & have had some great meets with them plus have made some great friends... |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
However they need to be able to hold a conversation with us both some just talk to me (Mrs J) we are a couple after all... |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I have been on here as part of a couple in the past and was surprised by the high proportion of mind numbingly lame or boring opening emails sent to us by single males. So if we got an interesting one even if not interested one of us would always send a reply. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
We are a couple that looks for single guys and over the years we have met quite a few really nice ones from here.
To be fair our location doesn't help but the one recurring theme on most of our messages is that guys do NOT read profiles.
We state our location at the beginning of the profile and anyone who has got past the first paragraph should know where we are, but because "who's near" says that we are 5km away they fire off a message. That in itself wouldn't be too bad, profiles can be out of date Etc. But the vast majority completely disregard everything else in the profile, most likely because they haven't bothered to read it. Then they get all uppity because we point this out to them.
For all they know the rest of the profile could say something like "Mrs likes to chop off cocks and nail them to the bedpost. Only message us if interested"
We know that over 99% of the guys on here will not be in (or visiting) our area and the fact that we only like to meet in clubs thins it down even more, but the few that do will always get a polite reply and more often than not a meet.
So come on guys. READ PROFILES BEFORE MESSAGING!
Trust us, it can pay dividends.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've met couples in the past, but I have also been let down by a few timewasters recently. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"We are pretty new to it all but Mrs has been on before and we just cant find a guy to suit us. We took a break over the holidays and have come back to have another go but have had similar experiences to you all so far. Either zero effort, want to meet this second or have even tried to flirt with Mrs alone. It's a shame as it's something we both want to try!"
hi both I am over your age limit but but would be happy to join you for you to experience this wonderful thing happy to chat about it and take things as slow as you want xxx
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? I would happily chat with you but am blocked as I am over your age limit
Tell us what you want to hear.
Something that shows you have read our profile, find us interesting and that reflects who you are and what you want. "Hi" or "Meet tonight?" doesnt do that. We try our best to reply to all the messages we get but since we get a lot of those it makes it super hard to get a conversation going."
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
" hi both I am over your age limit but but would be happy to join you for you to experience this wonderful thing happy to chat about it and take things as slow as you want xxx"
I know I am over your age limit but .......
I know you are looking for ....... but .......
These are the sort of messages people.get all the time and the senders wonder why they don't get a reply! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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" hi both I am over your age limit but but would be happy to join you for you to experience this wonderful thing happy to chat about it and take things as slow as you want xxx
I know I am over your age limit but .......
I know you are looking for ....... but .......
These are the sort of messages people.get all the time and the senders wonder why they don't get a reply!"
 . ^^^^^^ this |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
" hi both I am over your age limit but but would be happy to join you for you to experience this wonderful thing happy to chat about it and take things as slow as you want xxx
I know I am over your age limit but .......
I know you are looking for ....... but .......
These are the sort of messages people.get all the time and the senders wonder why they don't get a reply!"
You get people over the age of 99 messaging you? |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"
You get people over the age of 99 messaging you? "
What do you think?
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only problem I see is most couples don't wantvto meet men. So I guess the ones who do kind of drown out |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My preference is to meet a couple I’m sure it’s less drama no ties
Leeds area if there are couples out there |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"The only problem I see is most couples don't wantvto meet men. So I guess the ones who do kind of drown out"
It is true that most couples on here are not interested in single guys so there is no point wasting time and effort on them.
However there are still quite a lot that will, so best to concentrate the effort there.
A few tips.
1. Yes, read the profile.
2. Make sure that you are at least in their area. That doesn't mean just relying on "Who's Near" from our experience it is usually wrong.
3. Take note of what they want. For example: they might say no beards but you are a full on hipster, or trimmed/shaved pubes only and you've got a bush like the Black Forest.
4. Take note of where they like to meet. No point messaging someone who can't accom when you can't either. And if a couple say clubs only they usually mean it.
5. Smokers (yes there are some of us left LOL) There is no point messaging a couple who are smokers when your profile says "won't meet smokers" It's one of the first things we look at and (for us) usually leads to a good message being binned.
6. Put something into your message that shows you have read the profile. I don't mean one of these silly keyword things that you see on some profiles but say something about what they want that you can provide (no not just a cock)
A good message for us would read something like:
Hi just read your profile and like you I also like to meet in clubs (that proves to us that they have at least read some of it)
I'm just down the road from you in XYZ and wondered if you had any plans for this week? (proves that they know where we are)
Anything on those lines will always get a favourable response even if it doesn't end up as a meet.
The messages that will get either deleted or an unfavourable response will go something like:
Fancy meeting for a drink and see how it goes? (No we say clearly on the profile that we don't)
I'm in your area and have a couple of hours free this afternoon, fancy a meet? (answer as above)
I'm in Gran Canary, Tenerife, Lanzarote, or the Algarve and who's near says you are 5km from me. (We are not and it just proves again that you haven't read the profile)
Many guys post threads asking what is the secret to getting meets?
It's simple. Read the profile and tailor your message accordingly. It won't work every time but it will really give your chances a huge boost.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only problem I see is most couples don't wantvto meet men. So I guess the ones who do kind of drown out
It is true that most couples on here are not interested in single guys so there is no point wasting time and effort on them.
However there are still quite a lot that will, so best to concentrate the effort there.
A few tips.
1. Yes, read the profile.
2. Make sure that you are at least in their area. That doesn't mean just relying on "Who's Near" from our experience it is usually wrong.
3. Take note of what they want. For example: they might say no beards but you are a full on hipster, or trimmed/shaved pubes only and you've got a bush like the Black Forest.
4. Take note of where they like to meet. No point messaging someone who can't accom when you can't either. And if a couple say clubs only they usually mean it.
5. Smokers (yes there are some of us left LOL) There is no point messaging a couple who are smokers when your profile says "won't meet smokers" It's one of the first things we look at and (for us) usually leads to a good message being binned.
6. Put something into your message that shows you have read the profile. I don't mean one of these silly keyword things that you see on some profiles but say something about what they want that you can provide (no not just a cock)
A good message for us would read something like:
Hi just read your profile and like you I also like to meet in clubs (that proves to us that they have at least read some of it)
I'm just down the road from you in XYZ and wondered if you had any plans for this week? (proves that they know where we are)
Anything on those lines will always get a favourable response even if it doesn't end up as a meet.
The messages that will get either deleted or an unfavourable response will go something like:
Fancy meeting for a drink and see how it goes? (No we say clearly on the profile that we don't)
I'm in your area and have a couple of hours free this afternoon, fancy a meet? (answer as above)
I'm in Gran Canary, Tenerife, Lanzarote, or the Algarve and who's near says you are 5km from me. (We are not and it just proves again that you haven't read the profile)
Many guys post threads asking what is the secret to getting meets?
It's simple. Read the profile and tailor your message accordingly. It won't work every time but it will really give your chances a huge boost.
"
^^^ this |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m always polite and send well worded messages and I always include a face picture and I still don’t seem to get any luck. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I personally like to send more than a one liner.. even though responses have not been as forthcoming. Might need to change my profile a bit I think |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
We've probably had hundreds of guys message since relaxing our filters. Out of them maybe ten have sent messages with actual effort put in and are tailored to what we are looking for and how they think we would all be suitable for each other.
Out of those 10 I would say 3 also met our preferred age requirements etc so we had decided we would meet them socially when able.
One of those then decided to try and message Mrs privately. Faith in guys on here is probably at an all time low and the filters may well go back on. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Had some great meets with couples over the years but it's not easy! So much competition and choice and it must be a grind finding a decent guy. I've never sent a "fancy a fuck" message lol X |
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I think the 'effort'business is widespread over the younger generation. They have grown up in a world that has made life too easy for them, and that is evident when I talk with couples I meet - there biggest no-no is guys writing to them and thinking that "fancy a fuck" cuts it. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago
Surrey |
We look for single guys, but it’s far easier to search for them than hope they’ll find you. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Filters go off for an evening or day when the Mrs wants to go a hunting... then straight back on when shes found her prey. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing. "
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing.
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away."
That’s actually really helpful. I’ve kind of done the same thing and I thought I was being polite. Thanks. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing. "
Sadly that is quite common on here.
A way to out some of the wrong ones is to look at the veri's.
If they have none or just an odd one it is possible that the male half is just a dreamer who would like to do something but the Mrs isn't interested
Maybe he shows your pic to the Mrs and she just doesn't fancy you, but in that case at least a no thanks should be forthcoming.
All I can say is that if you are ever in our area and fancy going to a club we would be happy to try to arrange something. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing.
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away."
Out of interest how do you like to be approached as when I dm couples I always say about there pictures as that is what attracts me to them.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only problem I see is most couples don't wantvto meet men. So I guess the ones who do kind of drown out
It is true that most couples on here are not interested in single guys so there is no point wasting time and effort on them.
However there are still quite a lot that will, so best to concentrate the effort there.
A few tips.
1. Yes, read the profile.
2. Make sure that you are at least in their area. That doesn't mean just relying on "Who's Near" from our experience it is usually wrong.
3. Take note of what they want. For example: they might say no beards but you are a full on hipster, or trimmed/shaved pubes only and you've got a bush like the Black Forest.
4. Take note of where they like to meet. No point messaging someone who can't accom when you can't either. And if a couple say clubs only they usually mean it.
5. Smokers (yes there are some of us left LOL) There is no point messaging a couple who are smokers when your profile says "won't meet smokers" It's one of the first things we look at and (for us) usually leads to a good message being binned.
6. Put something into your message that shows you have read the profile. I don't mean one of these silly keyword things that you see on some profiles but say something about what they want that you can provide (no not just a cock)
A good message for us would read something like:
Hi just read your profile and like you I also like to meet in clubs (that proves to us that they have at least read some of it)
I'm just down the road from you in XYZ and wondered if you had any plans for this week? (proves that they know where we are)
Anything on those lines will always get a favourable response even if it doesn't end up as a meet.
The messages that will get either deleted or an unfavourable response will go something like:
Fancy meeting for a drink and see how it goes? (No we say clearly on the profile that we don't)
I'm in your area and have a couple of hours free this afternoon, fancy a meet? (answer as above)
I'm in Gran Canary, Tenerife, Lanzarote, or the Algarve and who's near says you are 5km from me. (We are not and it just proves again that you haven't read the profile)
Many guys post threads asking what is the secret to getting meets?
It's simple. Read the profile and tailor your message accordingly. It won't work every time but it will really give your chances a huge boost.
"
I'm not one for wasting my day reading profiles and sending messages. I don't even bother |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing.
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away.
Out of interest how do you like to be approached as when I dm couples I always say about there pictures as that is what attracts me to them.
"
Complimenting the pics is obviously fine and something we are sure most would welcome. For us it's not what is going to make us interested in you though.
With single guys we are primarily looking to be watched. We explain that in our profile so a guy introducing himself and telling us he has a voyeurism kink gets our interest as it shows he's read our profile and is messaging because we match up on what we are looking for. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *mooth8Man
over a year ago
s hertfordshire |
One problem is that the once great idea of the site being free is now lost to the dreamers and wasters. Its to easy for them to join and send annoying messages that turn genuine people off. This then affects others. I will always try to send a nice message never a crude one but still get met with the delete button or block. This tends to make you not want to bother putting together a decent thought out message. I dont blame couples for thier actions as they must get inundated with rubbish. I have met a few couoke who put no men on the profile in order to try and limit the number contacting. However many people can be downwrite rude tho and even as a site supporter for many years there seems little support. Maybe its time to start charging to join this may deter the wasters.
Or maybe an addition on the site "fabswingers elite" for long standing and genuine members. ? Just a thought. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
When I came on fab wasn't like that,people doesn't want put efforts anymore on both sides... Fab is like virtual supermarket, a microwave world |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"One problem is that the once great idea of the site being free is now lost to the dreamers and wasters. Its to easy for them to join and send annoying messages that turn genuine people off. This then affects others. I will always try to send a nice message never a crude one but still get met with the delete button or block. This tends to make you not want to bother putting together a decent thought out message. I dont blame couples for thier actions as they must get inundated with rubbish. I have met a few couoke who put no men on the profile in order to try and limit the number contacting. However many people can be downwrite rude tho and even as a site supporter for many years there seems little support. Maybe its time to start charging to join this may deter the wasters.
Or maybe an addition on the site "fabswingers elite" for long standing and genuine members. ? Just a thought. "
Totally agree on a fee. It shouldn't be much. Even if you said only site supporters could send message it would probably cut about 30% of the fantasists out. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing.
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away.
Out of interest how do you like to be approached as when I dm couples I always say about there pictures as that is what attracts me to them.
Complimenting the pics is obviously fine and something we are sure most would welcome. For us it's not what is going to make us interested in you though.
With single guys we are primarily looking to be watched. We explain that in our profile so a guy introducing himself and telling us he has a voyeurism kink gets our interest as it shows he's read our profile and is messaging because we match up on what we are looking for."
Ok thanks. Can’t beat a bit of watching mmm. I am in to all kinds of fun.
I always keep my dm clean so not to look like I am just in to dirty talk. That also adds to the fun but not in a first dm
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
Our experience is exactly this! Site is a waste of time. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering "
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"There are a few couples near me that are looking for single guys. I message them, but they never respond. I start with saying I love the hot pix, then small talk about plans for the weekend or something.
Get nothing.
For us personally they are the sort of messages we ignore. We aren't really looking for small talk and that combined with a compliment on our pics, whilst appreciated, just feels like a copy and paste style thing sent to every couple.
We get its difficult when profiles have hardly any info though. For us, we have explained our boundaries with couples and guys. We want an opening message to reference those and how they tie in with what you are looking for.
It tells us you have read it and contacted us because you think we may all match up. Not just because you like Mrs pics and just want to get your end away.
Out of interest how do you like to be approached as when I dm couples I always say about there pictures as that is what attracts me to them.
"
It isn't really that black and white. If someone compliments our pics we always try to say at least a thank you (although when we get a lot of messages one or two can get missed)
Being outside of the UK means the biggest problem we have is location. A message that acknowledges where we are and states that they are local to us (or visiting our area) will always get an answer even if just a no thanks.
Also if it is a message that interests us we will always check out the profile of the sender. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We gave up meeting single guys from here a while ago. It's easier to go to a club and hope there are some good guys there. If not at least we have a good time |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"We gave up meeting single guys from here a while ago. It's easier to go to a club and hope there are some good guys there. If not at least we have a good time "
What stopped you meeting single guys. You are local to myself and would love to meet you. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple. "
If they've read what we are looking for they will know how not to get deleted unread |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To date we have only received one message from a guy that was acceptable. Either one sentence or disgustingly over sexual. When one acts decently with us we will engage in conversation. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple.
If they've read what we are looking for they will know how not to get deleted unread"
So heading sherbet lemon and I am at the club Friday in the heading is the only thing I would put in the heading not to get a unread delete.
This is all I can see in your profile that would not get a delete or would I be miss understanding your profile.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
And for those of us who are genuine single guys looking for a couple The small majority have made it really difficult
Which is a shame, because I’m looking to meet a couple |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple.
If they've read what we are looking for they will know how not to get deleted unread
So heading sherbet lemon and I am at the club Friday in the heading is the only thing I would put in the heading not to get a unread delete.
This is all I can see in your profile that would not get a delete or would I be miss understanding your profile.
"
Pretty much that yeah. Can also see if there's a pic attached which is another thing we've asked for so would potentially delete any message without a paperclip icon. A lot of people use that trick to out people using the scattergun approach which is why it pays to read the profile! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple.
If they've read what we are looking for they will know how not to get deleted unread
So heading sherbet lemon and I am at the club Friday in the heading is the only thing I would put in the heading not to get a unread delete.
This is all I can see in your profile that would not get a delete or would I be miss understanding your profile.
Pretty much that yeah. Can also see if there's a pic attached which is another thing we've asked for so would potentially delete any message without a paperclip icon. A lot of people use that trick to out people using the scattergun approach which is why it pays to read the profile! "
Ok cool. Thanks for taking the time to reply. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Really feel your pain here. I'm deleting without reading message after message because guys haven't bothered to read our profile!! Some of them are so hot too! And we love playing with guys!!
I'm really not going to tar all the guys on here with the same brush as I know full well there are some real stars but the amount of morons who can't do the bare minimum of reading the profile is staggering
Out of interest if you haven’t read them what do you know is wrong or missed out in the dm.
Myself your profile is exactly what I would look for in a couple.
If they've read what we are looking for they will know how not to get deleted unread
So heading sherbet lemon and I am at the club Friday in the heading is the only thing I would put in the heading not to get a unread delete.
This is all I can see in your profile that would not get a delete or would I be miss understanding your profile.
Pretty much that yeah. Can also see if there's a pic attached which is another thing we've asked for so would potentially delete any message without a paperclip icon. A lot of people use that trick to out people using the scattergun approach which is why it pays to read the profile!
Ok cool. Thanks for taking the time to reply. "
No problem! The thing is though, I've seen people who are clearly wise to this trick and use the right heading but their message shows they clearly haven't actually considered if they are a good fit for us. They've probably skim read to find the "magic password". I'll open the message and read it but definitely won't reply |
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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago
Surrey |
"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses. "
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The crux of the problem when communicating with a couple as a single male is establishing that the female half of the couple exists....
What I have found in my experience is that 99.9% of couples that contact me are male lead...
I in turn will send a face pic and phone number... not because I’m desperate.. But to show the couple I am a real person and can verify by Facetime before any talk of a meeting can occur....
This in turn will have me labeled as pushy.......
I understand communication is the key to a successful meeting but couples should try to make single males comfortable also....
ESTABLISHING the female half of a couple should be any couples first priority because without the female half there is no fun.....
So effort goes both ways.......
|
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further "
Actually, this bares some truth to |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This thread has been so informative for me. I’ve been getting my approach all wrong even though I’ve been polite and respectful. Thanks to everyone who has or is giving good advice. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
See this is exactly where most go wrong,and not every cple have and expect same so the need to read a profile before contact is a must,I the male organise all our single male meets,we don't and won't pass phone numbers out,as up-to-date veris back up we are real,the reason for not passing phone numbers is u leave itself wide open to being directly pestered at all times of day or night and with modern phones now it links all contacts to media sites like facebook so then u start getting likes on pics that then leads to a pm from the guy to the female half if u met and played,we know not all men are like this but some men go to long lengths to stalk and show signs of being desperate in their messages which kills it,we have had men suddenly appear at our club from miles away making it clear they have monitored our activity,the message box on here is all that's needed and guys remember u could be chatting to the male half so don't cut ur throat with the I'm going to do this and that,a cple are both in this for the fun,if ur gone blank the guy in chat just to wet ur dick then the male half will deleat,its not a dating site to offer meals,holidays are to show off ur BMW ,its fun arranged and sorted,no PMS asking to meet alone or to escort to clubs lol. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"See this is exactly where most go wrong,and not every cple have and expect same so the need to read a profile before contact is a must,I the male organise all our single male meets,we don't and won't pass phone numbers out,as up-to-date veris back up we are real,the reason for not passing phone numbers is u leave itself wide open to being directly pestered at all times of day or night and with modern phones now it links all contacts to media sites like facebook so then u start getting likes on pics that then leads to a pm from the guy to the female half if u met and played,we know not all men are like this but some men go to long lengths to stalk and show signs of being desperate in their messages which kills it,we have had men suddenly appear at our club from miles away making it clear they have monitored our activity,the message box on here is all that's needed and guys remember u could be chatting to the male half so don't cut ur throat with the I'm going to do this and that,a cple are both in this for the fun,if ur gone blank the guy in chat just to wet ur dick then the male half will deleat,its not a dating site to offer meals,holidays are to show off ur BMW ,its fun arranged and sorted,no PMS asking to meet alone or to escort to clubs lol."
Male half here - This is the best post I've read on this subject so far, can definitely relate to all of the above as all those scenarios have happened to us in the past. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"The only problem I see is most couples don't wantvto meet men. So I guess the ones who do kind of drown out
It is true that most couples on here are not interested in single guys so there is no point wasting time and effort on them.
However there are still quite a lot that will, so best to concentrate the effort there.
A few tips.
1. Yes, read the profile.
2. Make sure that you are at least in their area. That doesn't mean just relying on "Who's Near" from our experience it is usually wrong.
3. Take note of what they want. For example: they might say no beards but you are a full on hipster, or trimmed/shaved pubes only and you've got a bush like the Black Forest.
4. Take note of where they like to meet. No point messaging someone who can't accom when you can't either. And if a couple say clubs only they usually mean it.
5. Smokers (yes there are some of us left LOL) There is no point messaging a couple who are smokers when your profile says "won't meet smokers" It's one of the first things we look at and (for us) usually leads to a good message being binned.
6. Put something into your message that shows you have read the profile. I don't mean one of these silly keyword things that you see on some profiles but say something about what they want that you can provide (no not just a cock)
A good message for us would read something like:
Hi just read your profile and like you I also like to meet in clubs (that proves to us that they have at least read some of it)
I'm just down the road from you in XYZ and wondered if you had any plans for this week? (proves that they know where we are)
Anything on those lines will always get a favourable response even if it doesn't end up as a meet.
The messages that will get either deleted or an unfavourable response will go something like:
Fancy meeting for a drink and see how it goes? (No we say clearly on the profile that we don't)
I'm in your area and have a couple of hours free this afternoon, fancy a meet? (answer as above)
I'm in Gran Canary, Tenerife, Lanzarote, or the Algarve and who's near says you are 5km from me. (We are not and it just proves again that you haven't read the profile)
Many guys post threads asking what is the secret to getting meets?
It's simple. Read the profile and tailor your message accordingly. It won't work every time but it will really give your chances a huge boost.
I'm not one for wasting my day reading profiles and sending messages. I don't even bother"
As Einstein said:
"For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction" |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The crux of the problem when communicating with a couple as a single male is establishing that the female half of the couple exists....
What I have found in my experience is that 99.9% of couples that contact me are male lead...
I in turn will send a face pic and phone number... not because I’m desperate.. But to show the couple I am a real person and can verify by Facetime before any talk of a meeting can occur....
This in turn will have me labeled as pushy.......
I understand communication is the key to a successful meeting but couples should try to make single males comfortable also....
ESTABLISHING the female half of a couple should be any couples first priority because without the female half there is no fun.....
So effort goes both ways.......
"
Do you use this approach even if they have recent verifications?
I can understand the wariness if there's no visible or recent verifications (even couples get messages from singles masquerading as a couple), but if the couple has recent verifications it's generally clear both of them are real  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Us nice guys who are polite and good humoured struggle due to the many other idiots on here. But every now and then your get lucky and it makes it worth it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
We have looked a couple of time’s , and just posted for wanting a single to watch us this week.
Our experience is like many , just one liners , no pics or effort . There have been some with effort but they don’t match what we are looking for. but sometimes sheer volume of just crap messages it losses it’s appeal.
The actual best message was from a verified couple ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sadly when we ask all we get is single men looking for sex and not single swinging males. The difference between the two is vast |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I feel this is a definate two way issue. Too mNy couples also don't take the time to meet the man rather than the assumptive single male.
There are strange folk out there of all kinds and it is hard to work who is more us and who are more then. Very frustrating especially if you have put in effort previously. As a result I have trimmed my profile so people don't make too many assumptions
How that makes sense |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And the old “i cant send face pics because.....” honestly do guys really think people will turn up and meet a complete stranger without even knowing what they look like, so so many sad reasons to question whether decent and genuine exist any more, we know they do but they are in a very very small minority, needle and haystack come to mind"
I was on previously as a couple. We had advertised for a gangbang to which we received a message from a guy my then partner didnt find attractive. When we sent a polite reply stating "sorry, you aren't her type" he replied with "but it's a gangbang, it doesn't matter"!
I did take the time to craft an articulate response explaining that just because it's a gangbang it doesn't mean she'll fuck anything that moves.
Bellend! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That’s the problem I think. People come into swinging thinking it’s no holds barred sex. If anything swinging has made us more selective with who we play with. Only the best stand a chance because that’s the ground couples and women can take. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s the problem I think. People come into swinging thinking it’s no holds barred sex. If anything swinging has made us more selective with who we play with. Only the best stand a chance because that’s the ground couples and women can take. "
Too many guys have a shit attitude. Lack of respect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m looking for couples and I’m not pushy and I certainly don’t presume you want to fuck every guy here .
I’m really enjoy flirting and teasing . I’d like to watch a couple too in various scenarios.
I’ve found it almost impossible to get reply’s from couple or single females .
I’ve had two verifications from my previous meets but this still hasn’t seemed to help .
Any advise would be welcome . |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Most of the time we meet people from clubs. You just know that everyone there is there for the same reason. You talk for a bit and if interested you can go to a room. And if they are very lucky we will meet again at some point out of the club. We find this works might not work for everyone but does for us. L and M |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
We only get a few approaches from singles guys. They are almost always polite. We’ve never had abuse. Generally the messages are short and bland and impersonal. The ones that make an effort to write something personal we always try to reply to, and usually we get a polite response back. Right now we are chatting to a really lovely guy, he’s funny and articulate and very polite. Ailsa is very picky. But this guy she likes. Our experience of single guys seems to be very different from most other couples and single ladies. I’ve said this before in the forums. I have no idea why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find that no matter how eloquent and funny I am, I still don’t get much response from couples or single females, and I’m not one of the blokes who message and pester couples or ladies who are looking for VWE ripped gym bunnies either, as not even I can claim to be that, no matter how I may want to! It’s a really tricky thing to stand out from the crowd, especially as an awful lot of couples tend to be bi males that pretend to be a couple. Not all I know, but a large amount are that or single male fantasists that think they’ll get meets that way. I’ve actually turned up to a meet, to be met by a guy claiming, mrs isn’t well, but we can have fun! Only to be surprised to be told, as per my profile, I’m not bi! It’s a frustrating task trying to arrange a meet, but we’re all still here. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"We only get a few approaches from singles guys. They are almost always polite. We’ve never had abuse. Generally the messages are short and bland and impersonal. The ones that make an effort to write something personal we always try to reply to, and usually we get a polite response back. Right now we are chatting to a really lovely guy, he’s funny
and articulate and very polite. Ailsa is very
picky. But this guy she likes. Our experience of
single guys seems to be very different from
most other couples and single ladies. I’ve said
Mthis before in the forums. I have no idea why.
"
Exactly the same as this. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The crux of the problem when communicating with a couple as a single male is establishing that the female half of the couple exists....
What I have found in my experience is that 99.9% of couples that contact me are male lead...
I in turn will send a face pic and phone number... not because I’m desperate.. But to show the couple I am a real person and can verify by Facetime before any talk of a meeting can occur....
This in turn will have me labeled as pushy.......
I understand communication is the key to a successful meeting but couples should try to make single males comfortable also....
ESTABLISHING the female half of a couple should be any couples first priority because without the female half there is no fun.....
So effort goes both ways.......
Do you use this approach even if they have recent verifications?
I can understand the wariness if there's no visible or recent verifications (even couples get messages from singles masquerading as a couple), but if the couple has recent verifications it's generally clear both of them are real "
Yes I do...... I have a inbox of 100 messages of
“ We are planning a trip to NYC and my wife would love to play with you , let’s chat and exchange pics “
They all have recent verifications and some even move their location to NYC......
Out of the 100’s of emails I received, my only verification called me from his or the hotel phone.... put this his wife on .... She said “ Yes we are a couple “
I said “ thank you “
We then proceeded to plan the meeting back on Fab email...
The point I’m trying to make to all couples is that....
How can you realistically expect a guy to turn up to a social or sex meeting without building some trust on your end......
If you can’t trust me with the male half of the couples cell number.....
How can you trust me with your address to your home?
How can you trust me with your wife? |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further
Actually, this bares some truth to "
It would be nice(r) to get a polite no thanks rather than no response at all |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further
Actually, this bares some truth to
It would be nice(r) to get a polite no thanks rather than no response at all "
I think just deleting the message and blocking me is reasonable. I know where I stand then and I can’t message back |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further "
Hey if you don't fancy me just let me know .
I can take a hint |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think the content of the message is important, your looks, body and decent veris makes a huge difference.
I have tried writing all types of quality messages but rarely get any response , some cpls make an effort to say no in a polite manner .
Some nutters reply as " message is boring ,don't contact again" lol
I think class has vanished off this site . |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Haha, been a good day for us on here, copy and paste message from the other side of the country, only speaking to myself (Mrs), more polite response than it probably deserved and now a status about being sick of 'arrogant arseholes' clearly leveled at us. I always hated blocking people but I'm understanding why it's there now! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i find its the guys who promise a great time are the worse ones of late .. like hey id love to spend the night with you but 10 mins after turning up they are getting dressed with a smile on there face leaving me thinking what the fuck was that .. these are not guys that have cum too quick these are guys who think this is the norm ... and its becoming more and more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
I think they've come to this site with the idea they'd get sex on a plate not realizing they're coming from outside into the dynamic of a loving couple and think they don't have to make the effort....
Shame really. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I feel this is a definate two way issue. Too mNy couples also don't take the time to meet the man rather than the assumptive single male.
There are strange folk out there of all kinds and it is hard to work who is more us and who are more then. Very frustrating especially if you have put in effort previously. As a result I have trimmed my profile so people don't make too many assumptions
How that makes sense"
It would have made more sense if I had actually checked the spelling.. Hopefully you got the gist |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested?
I think they've come to this site with the idea they'd get sex on a plate not realizing they're coming from outside into the dynamic of a loving couple and think they don't have to make the effort....
Shame really."
I think if you handcrafted 100s of messages and didn't get a response back you'll stop writing detailed handcrafted messages.
Like someone mentioned above, some people are OK with a "hi, I'm also into xyz and I live near you. Fancy meeting up for a, drink sometime?"
Let's be honest a lot of the selection criteria is looks anyway. We might all just be contestants on ITV's Naked Attraction. The decision is made once the middle part or the chest is revealed
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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago
Surrey |
"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further
Actually, this bares some truth to
It would be nice(r) to get a polite no thanks rather than no response at all "
But why? The end result is still the same, would having “No thanks” in writing make you feel less rejected? Remember you messaged them; do you reply to every piece of junk mail you receive through your letterbox? |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Single guys that are genuinely single are normally single for a reason (looks, attitude, age) . the best guys to meet are ones that are in couples or potentially ones that have a secret partner (fab single) .
Guys can’t win however they message, if you send a long detailed message we tend to just think your desperate and trying too hard and if you send a few words we think that you’ve sent the same message to everyone.
We only meet guys now in here that I’ve seen photos of in new photos or top photos that I like and then will message and see how they act. Or we meet guys in nightclubs. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
There are a few of us genuine single guys out there. But there are plenty of dicks to wade through too.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always write a polite message, non of the how are you stuff as im sure thats used and boring now but it still seems im of little interest. Maybe i am judged by my tattoos, i know they arent for everyone.
I know i have verifications all except one are from friends i have made while in the local clubs |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Single guys that are genuinely single are normally single for a reason (looks, attitude, age) . the best guys to meet are ones that are in couples or potentially ones that have a secret partner (fab single) .
Guys can’t win however they message, if you send a long detailed message we tend to just think your desperate and trying too hard and if you send a few words we think that you’ve sent the same message to everyone.
We only meet guys now in here that I’ve seen photos of in new photos or top photos that I like and then will message and see how they act. Or we meet guys in nightclubs. "
I admire your honesty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some of us just don’t approach because we aren’t sure how to open that Particular chat.
Promise we’re not all that bad, haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Out of interest, what sort of thing to people put in the subject line and what sort of thing do couples and ladies look for........asking for a friend ?? |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I always read the profiles of females / couples I'm interested in before sending a message however I receive very few responses.
Maybe there just isn’t an attraction, no matter what the message says if the missus doesn’t fancy them it won’t any further
Actually, this bares some truth to
It would be nice(r) to get a polite no thanks rather than no response at all
But why? The end result is still the same, would having “No thanks” in writing make you feel less rejected? Remember you messaged them; do you reply to every piece of junk mail you receive through your letterbox?"
No but I've taken the time to construct a detailed message of why I think I may be suitable it would be nice to receive any response. Now if the person I send my messages to doesn't delete my message and block me I take it as a success |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just us or are you guys finding that nobody puts any effort anymore, either on they're profile or in the messages they send? Maybe its just us but its becoming increasingly harder to find anyone decent that just thinks, “fancy a fuck” is going to get us interested? "
if that's the only message those guys can come up then why waste your time.. most guys that get attention on here have solid profiles .. face pics and send messages with respect
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Sadly when we ask all we get is single men looking for sex and not single swinging males. The difference between the two is vast "
Sadly the single.male swingers are few and far between on this site. We find socials are the best place to find them.
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"Sadly when we ask all we get is single men looking for sex and not single swinging males. The difference between the two is vast
Sadly the single.male swingers are few and far between on this site. We find socials are the best place to find them.
"
I think a lot of the rude guys are just not swinging, It's few drinks and take the piss , I have had girls playing the same game , True swingers are polite as I always am , even if it's a no |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Sadly when we ask all we get is single men looking for sex and not single swinging males. The difference between the two is vast
Sadly the single.male swingers are few and far between on this site. We find socials are the best place to find them.
I think a lot of the rude guys are just not swinging, It's few drinks and take the piss , I have had girls playing the same game , True swingers are polite as I always am , even if it's a no "
True I've seen a fair few who act up on here and also at some Club events. It seems they don't understand the concept of swinging. I've had both single women and couples who can be just as bad though, thinking because they offer me a fuck that I'll drop whatever I'm doing and go meet them! Plain disrespectful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would like to meet up with a couple nit just for a one off but to have a good friendship and long term fun. Sadly as a single older man I have not had one meeting with a couple or women |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Just to add to the message thing.
We quite often get very nice polite messages that go something like:
"Hi, I've just read your profile and you look very interesting and I just love your pics. Fancy meeting for a drink sometime?"
1. We check their profile and they are 500 miles away.
2. No mention in the profile or message that they are even visiting our area.
3. The profile that they found so interesting clearly states that we don't do private meets.
Polite message though. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Hi
I'm a nice guy never rude, and always willing to please what couples like to explore. Have a very dirty mind and always play safe. |
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It's about profiles too. If we get a message that doesn't have much effort put into it and then we check the profile to find no effort has been made with that either... Its a definite no.
Guys say there's no point in writing detailed messages as most get ignored but that doesn't excuse an empty profile.
It just makes us think you will make no effort during a meet and that's no what we want if we are welcoming you into our relationship temporarily. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"It's about profiles too. If we get a message that doesn't have much effort put into it and then we check the profile to find no effort has been made with that either... Its a definite no.
Guys say there's no point in writing detailed messages as most get ignored but that doesn't excuse an empty profile.
It just makes us think you will make no effort during a meet and that's no what we want if we are welcoming you into our relationship temporarily. "
Or no effort to turn up at all. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
