FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Couples doing a “bait and switch”
Couples doing a “bait and switch”
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This is something that happens to me a lot and is really annoying - when I’m talking to a couple and they suddenly say they want me to meet the man on his own, not as a couple. In a lot of cases I think the “couple” profile was probably really just a single man pretending, but I’ve even had this from well-verified, real couples.
Ladies, does this happen to you as well? Also, couples, have you done this kind of thing when talking to a single woman, and why? I realise that a couple may not both fancy the same person, but I’d prefer it if they just said so. |
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"This is something that happens to me a lot and is really annoying - when I’m talking to a couple and they suddenly say they want me to meet the man on his own, not as a couple. In a lot of cases I think the “couple” profile was probably really just a single man pretending, but I’ve even had this from well-verified, real couples.
Ladies, does this happen to you as well? Also, couples, have you done this kind of thing when talking to a single woman, and why? I realise that a couple may not both fancy the same person, but I’d prefer it if they just said so."
The opposite here. It's the female half who plays. The male has no involvement. But we are always upfront about it |
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"This is something that happens to me a lot and is really annoying - when I’m talking to a couple and they suddenly say they want me to meet the man on his own, not as a couple. In a lot of cases I think the “couple” profile was probably really just a single man pretending, but I’ve even had this from well-verified, real couples.
Ladies, does this happen to you as well? Also, couples, have you done this kind of thing when talking to a single woman, and why? I realise that a couple may not both fancy the same person, but I’d prefer it if they just said so.
The opposite here. It's the female half who plays. The male has no involvement. But we are always upfront about it"
That way round I wouldn’t mind, and anyway if everyone is upfront from the start you all know where you stand, but the ones who string you along letting you think you’d be meeting both are the ones that annoy me. |
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"Most couple profiles they always end saying that only the male half will meet , i guess they are just fake profiles in my opinion . I just block them "
That’s what I think with most of them, but I’ve had some who seem like experienced swingers and have loads of veris do the same thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have never or would ever do that, we meet as a couple I'm sure it could be thing for some couples of course, and some will definitely be fake profiles, fab can be such a minefield!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive had some "straight" couples which have started demanding that i meet with the guy first for a jack off session and stuff. Clearly not a women involved in my opinion usually |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
I had one couple (fans), he was keen but he said she didn't come on so he was arranging. So I said they needed to video call me together.
He sent a message to say she wasn't comfortable with the whole thing. I felt they were genuine but that it was his fantasy not hers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve met a cpl here who I met the male socially in the first instance and agreed to a rather more intimate meeting later that evening. The next meet about a month later (we did keep in touch) I met both. They said they usually meet as a cpl only but occasionally play solo by way of each other’s agreement which is fine. Trouble is too many “cpl” are actually SM not being honest and that makes us doubt the genuine peeps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We talked to a whole bunch of couples profiles that we suspected were just single men. Usually there weren't any pictures of the couple together available and when we asked for a "couple' picture it was always mysteriously hard to provide one. I suppose looking back it's obvious now.
I don't see much wrong with the guy mainly running the profile and doing the admin.that's what I do - my wife just finds it tedious - but I admit that it probably does under some circumstances give the wrong impression too. |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
We do it a bit differently here. We meet together but if we became regular fwb’s & everyone was happy then either of us could meet alone.
We just don’t meet separately to start with as Fab for us is a shared experience.
S
S
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"I had one couple (fans), he was keen but he said she didn't come on so he was arranging. So I said they needed to video call me together.
He sent a message to say she wasn't comfortable with the whole thing. I felt they were genuine but that it was his fantasy not hers."
I think there are quite a few on here like that. Pretty much if the Male didn’t push it then it would never happen. Saying that I keep it going on here H prefers to use social media contacts & the Poly groups.
All our meets this year bar one social have come from her side. Think our profile here may be too much for those just wanting some fun.
Oh well.. 
S
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This happens all the time ......
Usually they string you all until the night of the meeting....
Then mysteriously the wife is sick , called in to work or mother died....
But fortunately the male half is still available to meet.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This happens all the time ......
Usually they string you all until the night of the meeting....
Then mysteriously the wife is sick , called in to work or mother died....
But fortunately the male half is still available to meet...."
And even if your straight and very upfront about it throughout this guy will still throw a tantrum when you chose with ample warning that you will not be meeting under the conditions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This happens all the time ......
Usually they string you all until the night of the meeting....
Then mysteriously the wife is sick , called in to work or mother died....
But fortunately the male half is still available to meet....
And even if your straight and very upfront about it throughout this guy will still throw a tantrum when you chose with ample warning that you will not be meeting under the conditions"
Yes, they will sometimes throw abuse.... |
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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago
carrbrook stalybridge |
we have one pops up with a new name every so often they want to meet but the wife is shy & nervous ( but isnt in thier pics ) so could the male half come alone the first time ?
like we are gonna fall for that one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don’t worry men get this too, you get chatting to a couple and the. The guy says he will meet first for fun and if all goes well the couple willl meet, that’s the point to hit the block button |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don’t worry men get this too, you get chatting to a couple and the. The guy says he will meet first for fun and if all goes well the couple willl meet, that’s the point to hit the block button"
Agreed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are tones of "couples" that suddenly the one is never available to meet? Find it very annoying "
Yeah its a pretty questionable route of conversation, espically when they ask if you can move to whatsapp or kik but the wife doesnt have either convienetly |
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"We do it a bit differently here. We meet together but if we became regular fwb’s & everyone was happy then either of us could meet alone.
We just don’t meet separately to start with as Fab for us is a shared experience.
S
S
"
This is what we do, it isn't for everyone but we are happy with it x |
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"We do it a bit differently here. We meet together but if we became regular fwb’s & everyone was happy then either of us could meet alone.
We just don’t meet separately to start with as Fab for us is a shared experience.
S
S
This is what we do, it isn't for everyone but we are happy with it x"
Yep, we do this but it's all cards on the table and both know what's going on x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Couple accounts who were verified as couples but then separated so the guy carries on using it, "so more people will talk to him" drives me crazy.
"
This is why I think verification should be yearly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is something that happens to me a lot and is really annoying - when I’m talking to a couple and they suddenly say they want me to meet the man on his own, not as a couple. In a lot of cases I think the “couple” profile was probably really just a single man pretending, but I’ve even had this from well-verified, real couples.
Ladies, does this happen to you as well? Also, couples, have you done this kind of thing when talking to a single woman, and why? I realise that a couple may not both fancy the same person, but I’d prefer it if they just said so."
most couple profiles are lead by a guy or are a guy and it is common that the guy asks to play alone in my experience anyway ive met a few women who met couples because they themselves were bi and the guys would text at odd times and ask if they could pop round, one woman got really quite upset she felt she was being used and when she told me i agreed she was    |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we come across this alot, we turned a couple down the other day for this reason, oh only m free tonight, then set up a single profile then ffs, we then got some very abusive messages, and you could tell by the wording that it was the m writing them, block and move on, we just think its a bit sad really |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we come across this alot, we turned a couple down the other day for this reason, oh only m free tonight, then set up a single profile then ffs, we then got some very abusive messages, and you could tell by the wording that it was the m writing them, block and move on, we just think its a bit sad really"
Agreed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry to hear this happens it's seems using fab for for any type of meets is getting harder and harder with the fakes, dishonest, cheaters, fantasists, blaggers and so on.
We are a genuine couple who are happy to play together with a single female or my wife play with a single woman on her own with myself downstairs but out of the way if needed.
We will provide pictures of us together, Skype video call with us together, provide verifications, both of us are happy to speak on the same phone call etc but even still we have had no success in finding a single woman on fab. The clubs are a different story and we are moving more and more to just using the clubs for all types of meets now.
KJ x |
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I think it's worthwhile getting into voice chats with them all at the earliest opportunity, to set the ground rules and sort the wheat from the chaff. If people change the rules etc. I bail. Not reliable |
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"This happens all the time ......
Usually they string you all until the night of the meeting....
Then mysteriously the wife is sick , called in to work or mother died....
But fortunately the male half is still available to meet...."
Same, mrs is never able to speak on phone etc. Had plenty where there was no pics of them together either, just one random face pic of mrs then loads of nudes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Most couple profiles they always end saying that only the male half will meet , i guess they are just fake profiles in my opinion . I just block them "
Well that's less than factual |
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I've convesed with quite a few "couples" where the "wife" is:
"in bed" "asleep", "at work", "round at her sick mothers", "out with friends", and this morning "shopping at the supermarket" - he mysteriously vanished when I pointed out that it's a Sunday, and the supermarkets don't open while 10-00! 
Such is Fab! |
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"I've convesed with quite a few "couples" where the "wife" is:
"in bed" "asleep", "at work", "round at her sick mothers", "out with friends", and this morning "shopping at the supermarket" - he mysteriously vanished when I pointed out that it's a Sunday, and the supermarkets don't open while 10-00!
Such is Fab! "
"conversed". |
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(Lou) we only ever meet together even though it is only me who plays, and we have been upfront about this on our profile. We do have a photo of us both on our friends pics for anyone who we are planning to meet.
We both read the messages and it is mainly me who responds though if Ray does he will put his name on so the other woman/couple know who they are talking to.
We both discuss whether we should meet the other party, however the overall decision is mine but I do take into account any concerns that Ray may have, and he would never arrange a meet, that is down to me.
|
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"We have never or would ever do that, we meet as a couple I'm sure it could be thing for some couples of course, and some will definitely be fake profiles, fab can be such a minefield!! "
It’s even more strange when the profile says they don’t meet separately! |
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"Couple accounts who were verified as couples but then separated so the guy carries on using it, "so more people will talk to him" drives me crazy.
"
‘So I can get past more people’s message filters’ might be closer to the truth lol. |
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"Ive had some "straight" couples which have started demanding that i meet with the guy first for a jack off session and stuff. Clearly not a women involved in my opinion usually"
Good grief I guess I’m kind of reassured that this even happens to guys, but I’m amazed they think that ploy will work! |
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"I had one couple (fans), he was keen but he said she didn't come on so he was arranging. So I said they needed to video call me together.
He sent a message to say she wasn't comfortable with the whole thing. I felt they were genuine but that it was his fantasy not hers."
Oh I do think that’s very common. With real couples (as opposed to FWB couples) I always worry that the woman might be under pressure to have a threesome when she doesn’t really want to, so I insist on a social with both of them and a clear conversation about what’s ok and what’s not. Funnily enough, they all disappear at that point! |
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"We talked to a whole bunch of couples profiles that we suspected were just single men. Usually there weren't any pictures of the couple together available and when we asked for a "couple' picture it was always mysteriously hard to provide one. I suppose looking back it's obvious now.
I don't see much wrong with the guy mainly running the profile and doing the admin.that's what I do - my wife just finds it tedious - but I admit that it probably does under some circumstances give the wrong impression too. "
I don’t see a problem with the man doing the admin - as a single woman I can fully understand why the women might not want to! As long as there’s no deceit involved. |
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"We do it a bit differently here. We meet together but if we became regular fwb’s & everyone was happy then either of us could meet alone.
We just don’t meet separately to start with as Fab for us is a shared experience.
S
S
"
That makes sense to me, and in that situation where everyone knows each other and it’s been discussed and it’s all above board, that wouldn’t bother me at all. It’s when they’re straight away wanting me to meet the man alone that I don’t like it. |
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"This happens all the time ......
Usually they string you all until the night of the meeting....
Then mysteriously the wife is sick , called in to work or mother died....
But fortunately the male half is still available to meet...."
I avoid this by insisting on a social with both - if she’s “not available” at that stage that’s the end of it. This is probably why I’ve only met one couple so far and they’re FWBs. |
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"Well yes also a single females profile nothing about a guy on it then I only meet with my fella or fb "
I had a cracking one once - talking to a single woman, we chatted for a bit, then she said “my fantasy is to send my boyfriend to meet another woman and have him send me pics during the meet”. Guess what I didn’t do! |
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"The last two "couples" I chatted to ended up being single females. I'm not complaining lol but do single women set up couples profiles too? "
.
That’s not one I’ve encountered, how odd! It’s not like we don’t get enough attention as single women! |
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"We are the other way round, its always me the female online and i meet alone, x"
But you’re totally upfront about that in your profile. That’s really all I want, is for these couples to be upfront about what they want! |
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"
Sorry to hear this happens it's seems using fab for for any type of meets is getting harder and harder with the fakes, dishonest, cheaters, fantasists, blaggers and so on.
We are a genuine couple who are happy to play together with a single female or my wife play with a single woman on her own with myself downstairs but out of the way if needed.
We will provide pictures of us together, Skype video call with us together, provide verifications, both of us are happy to speak on the same phone call etc but even still we have had no success in finding a single woman on fab. The clubs are a different story and we are moving more and more to just using the clubs for all types of meets now.
KJ x"
I can only assume you’re having trouble because of fake “couples” spoiling it for the genuine ones, which is a shame. |
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It’s amazing just how many ‘couples’ profiles on here only have pictures of a male (and usually just one particular part of him ). I work on the assumption that if there is no picture of the lady then they simply don’t exist ! |
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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago
Plymouth |
One thing we check on veris is date!! If the couples profile veris are 2 years old it's possible they arent a couple anymore and the single man is using the profile.
We get loads of couples profiles just wanting to meet me the female. But struggle to find couples wanti_g couples. |
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"It’s amazing just how many ‘couples’ profiles on here only have pictures of a male (and usually just one particular part of him ). I work on the assumption that if there is no picture of the lady then they simply don’t exist ! "
Interestingly I’ve found the reverse - only pics of the woman. I prefer to see both if I’m going to play with both. But even with pics of the woman (or a woman anyway) it often seems to be a man. |
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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"It’s amazing just how many ‘couples’ profiles on here only have pictures of a male (and usually just one particular part of him ). I work on the assumption that if there is no picture of the lady then they simply don’t exist !
Interestingly I’ve found the reverse - only pics of the woman. I prefer to see both if I’m going to play with both. But even with pics of the woman (or a woman anyway) it often seems to be a man."
We have lots of pics of me and less of C because C is camera shy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Anyone ever get this one? - You’re talking to a couples profile that want to meet. When it comes time to meet they tell you that they’ll be out at a bar. They then suggest you come over and start chatting to the wife “but don’t mention anything about fab to her”.
I’ve lost track of how many times “couples” (husbands) have tried that trick |
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We get it from both sides.
The couples where only the man is available and the women who are on a single profile but then direct us to their couples profile or ask to being a friend.
If we message were looking for what you've advertised. If we message a single lady we don't want a couple. If we message a couple we don't want a single guy.
We also get the odd single guy who message us about bringing a female but it's always after we turn them down like they're trying to sweeten the deal or something. That's a lot less common though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is something that happens to me a lot and is really annoying - when I’m talking to a couple and they suddenly say they want me to meet the man on his own, not as a couple. In a lot of cases I think the “couple” profile was probably really just a single man pretending, but I’ve even had this from well-verified, real couples.
Ladies, does this happen to you as well? Also, couples, have you done this kind of thing when talking to a single woman, and why? I realise that a couple may not both fancy the same person, but I’d prefer it if they just said so.
The opposite here. It's the female half who plays. The male has no involvement. But we are always upfront about it"
The best way to be is honest about everything upfront  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Happens alot. They pretend to be part of a couple or the missus/partner knows...they dont.
They get my kik & pester me to play alone which aint happening. Block them straightaway. Very annoying.
MsDub |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We meet in clubs rules out the idiots they won’t pay single guys m_mberships "
I'm sorry the price of a m_mbership has no reflection on mental capability |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Sorry to hear this happens it's seems using fab for for any type of meets is getting harder and harder with the fakes, dishonest, cheaters, fantasists, blaggers and so on.
We are a genuine couple who are happy to play together with a single female or my wife play with a single woman on her own with myself downstairs but out of the way if needed.
We will provide pictures of us together, Skype video call with us together, provide verifications, both of us are happy to speak on the same phone call etc but even still we have had no success in finding a single woman on fab. The clubs are a different story and we are moving more and more to just using the clubs for all types of meets now.
KJ x
I can only assume you’re having trouble because of fake “couples” spoiling it for the genuine ones, which is a shame."
I think your right sadly.
I now understand how frustrating it must for genuine single male swingers on here having things constantly spoiled by the fake, rude, fantasist, abusive, single males.
It doesn't matter who you are or what your looking for the fake epidemic on fab is effecting everyone.
I'm not sure what the solution is?
KJ x |
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We are a couple and meet as a couple hence the gap between meets as life gets in the way. Have had all the stories when we have tried to arrange something and get to the point now where everyone is treated with a pinch of salt. It's sucked the fun out of this for us just now. |
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A few years back we were staying in a hotel in Farnborough and fancied a meet .
We put a meetup up and within an hour three couples replied.
One by one the excuses came " my missus is at a works party so I'm on my own"," the wife is ill,so I'm on my own " and "I'm allowed to play on my own ,do you fancy meeting me ?".
One of them somehow worked out who we were and gave us updates on what we were doing in the hotel.
We left Fabswingers after that but are back older and wiser. |
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"Anyone ever get this one? - You’re talking to a couples profile that want to meet. When it comes time to meet they tell you that they’ll be out at a bar. They then suggest you come over and start chatting to the wife “but don’t mention anything about fab to her”.
I’ve lost track of how many times “couples” (husbands) have tried that trick"
What? That’s crazy! And sounds like an absolute minefield. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's bollocks really, why not just set up a single guy's profile?
We're only meeting together at the moment, but if we ever were to meet separately then we both have our singles profiles which we'd use instead?
Neither of us had problems getting the kind of meets we wanted on them before we got together anyway, plus it's much smarter as everyone would know what they're getting so there's less chance of the whole thing falling flat.
B |
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"It's bollocks really, why not just set up a single guy's profile?
We're only meeting together at the moment, but if we ever were to meet separately then we both have our singles profiles which we'd use instead?
Neither of us had problems getting the kind of meets we wanted on them before we got together anyway, plus it's much smarter as everyone would know what they're getting so there's less chance of the whole thing falling flat.
B"
I’m sure they think it’ll get them past message filters or get their foot in the door and then we’ll undoubtedly succumb to their many charms |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's bollocks really, why not just set up a single guy's profile?
We're only meeting together at the moment, but if we ever were to meet separately then we both have our singles profiles which we'd use instead?
Neither of us had problems getting the kind of meets we wanted on them before we got together anyway, plus it's much smarter as everyone would know what they're getting so there's less chance of the whole thing falling flat.
B
I’m sure they think it’ll get them past message filters or get their foot in the door and then we’ll undoubtedly succumb to their many charms "
The thing is though, there's more single ladies looking for single guys then there are single ladies looking for couples, so what do they hope to actually achieve? 
B |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Almost every “couple” I’ve ever chatted to turns out to be either:
a) a married bloke who gets off on showing strangers pics of his wife (usually taken without her knowledge), while he wanks off, or
b) secretly bi married men trying to tempt a straight man with the prospect of fucking his wife so he can clean up afterwards (ie. suck me off). Again the wife is always in total ignorance....... |
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"I don’t know why anyone feels that have to do this. If you can’t be honest about what you want on here then I don’t know where you can! "
Like all the fab straight on here until it gets closer to meeting then the bi questions come out of nowhere ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a couple profile message ‘it’s the guy here but would need to be discreet.’
Why do you need to tell me to be discrete if you have a couples profile? Do people normally put banners outside their house to announce that they’re having sex with someone they met on fab? Clearly was a lying little shit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've had "couples" contact us with only the male available, these we treat all of these as fake accounts and block them. We have also met with a couple and the male just sat watching with a can of beer in his hand, very weird.
So we have a simple rule, if you have a couples profile we want to meet and play with both of you, otherwise we would just seek singles. |
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