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Questions For Couples
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Hello,
We’ve been on and off the scene for many years, so these questions are not for our benefit, but I was thinking about them and wondered what others own experiences were.
If they help newbies, so much the better! Thank you!
1. How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene?
2. Who introduced who?
3. How was it received?
4. How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective?
5. What impact has it had on your relationship?
Assuming you are several years in to it now:
6. Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed?
7. Who initiates meetings these days?
8. How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise?
9. What wisdom would you offer to newbies?
Thank you for your time, and I hope your own reflections are as interesting to you as ours were to us!
Mr&Mrs DS |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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1.How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene?
= we both were very sexual and very open with each other from the start having both come from shit relationships
2.Who introduced who?
= we both talked so it was both of our idea’s ..it was watching a 3some porn film that sparked the convo
3.How was it received?
= very good and we both jump head first in knowing we both wanted
4.How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective?
= we met a couple who played with another couple with the intention of watching we’ll the watching didn’t last long lol
5.What impact has it had on your relationship? Assuming you are several years in to it now:
=None as we were already very open trusting and loving nothings changed there if swinging is keeping you together then there’s something wrong … our relationship first and swinging extra … if your relationship is not good then you will not survive swinging
6.Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed?
=Yes sexual preference and kinks have changed but we are still turning each other on
7.Who initiates meetings these days?
=Mainly me as we are a cuckold couple
8.How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise?
= we both love the lifestyle the day one of us want out we both come out its us before the lifestyle
9.What wisdom would you offer to newbies?
= always be yourself and have your own rules never let other change that we were told on our very first meet by a then old couple that there’s only one real rule in the lifestyle and that’s the word ’’no’’ …. The rules are what you both want if one don’t agree then both don’t agree … swinging is not a relationship saver swinging is a lifestyle for those already in strong relationships ..unless you’re a single swinger that is…..
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"1.How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene?
= we both were very sexual and very open with each other from the start having both come from shit relationships
2.Who introduced who?
= we both talked so it was both of our idea’s ..it was watching a 3some porn film that sparked the convo
3.How was it received?
= very good and we both jump head first in knowing we both wanted
4.How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective?
= we met a couple who played with another couple with the intention of watching we’ll the watching didn’t last long lol
5.What impact has it had on your relationship? Assuming you are several years in to it now:
=None as we were already very open trusting and loving nothings changed there if swinging is keeping you together then there’s something wrong … our relationship first and swinging extra … if your relationship is not good then you will not survive swinging
6.Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed?
=Yes sexual preference and kinks have changed but we are still turning each other on
7.Who initiates meetings these days?
=Mainly me as we are a cuckold couple
8.How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise?
= we both love the lifestyle the day one of us want out we both come out its us before the lifestyle
9.What wisdom would you offer to newbies?
= always be yourself and have your own rules never let other change that we were told on our very first meet by a then old couple that there’s only one real rule in the lifestyle and that’s the word ’’no’’ …. The rules are what you both want if one don’t agree then both don’t agree … swinging is not a relationship saver swinging is a lifestyle for those already in strong relationships ..unless you’re a single swinger that is…..
"
To much spare time on your hands. |
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Crikey OP are you doing a dissertation on swinging couples?
I will try to remember all your questions and answer them from my perspective.
Hubby and I initially discussed swinging clubs as a way to explore my bisexuality but it ended up being about swinging too.
We started with clubs, still mostly do clubs and swapped on our very first club visit.
Our relationship is stronger than ever, though we have fewer sex meets these days. Partly because we have done everything we set out to do, partly being more picky now as a result, partly due to my hormones and variable sex drive and partly life getting in the way.
Things have changed only in that I now meet ladies alone and we are even more sure, that we make a great couple. |
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Thank you for those taking the time to reply on the forum (or privately). It is much appreciated.
Nope, not writing a dissertation! However I am interested in anthropology, particularly social anthropology.
But if others who see the thread find it helps them in some way, then all well and good.
Thank you,
Mr DS
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hello,
We’ve been on and off the scene for many years, so these questions are not for our benefit, but I was thinking about them and wondered what others own experiences were.
If they help newbies, so much the better! Thank you!
1. How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene? D stumbled across this site, pretty much!
2. Who introduced who? D brought it up with me.
3. How was it received? Very well, of course. Lol.
4. How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective? It was a late night, last minute meet that was average. Not particularly the kind of guy we would go for now, but he was great to set the training wheels off.
5. What impact has it had on your relationship? A good one. If anything, since beginning swinging, we've become a lot more open, confident and kinky, haha.
Assuming you are several years in to it now:
6. Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed? Oh yeah, massively.
7. Who initiates meetings these days? Both, really. It depends on the situation!
8. How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise? Love it.
9. What wisdom would you offer to newbies? Communicate. Be open and honest and don't dive in head first, it is TOTALLY okay to take it at your own pace, whatever that may be!
Thank you for your time, and I hope your own reflections are as interesting to you as ours were to us!
Mr&Mrs DS"
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I think it's a great post. You'll find if you don't post regularly on the forum and belong to the forum cult people can be a bit of a twat to you.
I'm in a relationship but my partner does not swing with me as he had an accident which left him unable to perform so I'll just respond as a person in an open relationship.
1. How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene?
I have always met people online since I was 16. I found it a better way to meet people rather than meeting random people in bars/clubs etc. Also let me freely state what I wanted without being judged for my likes.
2. Who introduced who?
My partner always accepted my lifestyle choice as we have been friends for many years before getting into a relationship.
3. How was it received?
Well
4. How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective?
The first time I slept with someone else since getting in a relationship with my partner was brilliant. He asked me all about it and we laughed about it a lot.
5. What impact has it had on your relationship?
To be honest it hasn't had an impact on our relationship really. Other than it making me happy.
Assuming you are several years in to it now:
6. Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed?
Yes my tastes have definitely changed. I think I'm less up for bull shit now. And I find myself getting more direct a probably a bit more picky.
7. Who initiates meetings these days?
N/a
8. How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise?
I think my partner worries about me less.
9. What wisdom would you offer to newbies?
Communication and being honest with each other is the most important thing. Making sure you still make time for each other too and not getting wrapped up in just doing it with others.
Hope that helps! |
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Think it's a really good set of questions. As the same with anything on here you don't have to reply if you don't want to
Our answers below. Enjoy x
1. How did you and your partner get first introduced into the scene?
- by scene we assume to mean the first time anyone else other than the two of us engaged in a sexual act with one of us. We were about 18 and having dinner with a Male friend. Dinner and drink mixed with an empty house equalled our first ever threesome.
2. Who introduced who?
- as above, mutual decision, spontaneous event
3. How was it received?
- we're still here aren't we?
4. How did the first experience go, from each partners perspective?
D (male) - it was just a bit of fun with a mate at the time. It went further than I expected it to but on the whole really enjoyed it. Watching C have sex with someone else still remains one of the hottest things to happen between us.
C (female) - very nerve wracking and a little confusing until it became clear that having two lots of everything just increased the potential and the fun. Once it had settled down it was great fun and nice to be teased and pleased in two different ways.
5. What impact has it had on your relationship?
Back then, huge! We were teased mercilessly in sixth form for including another guy in our relationship. D was accused of being gay and it didn't go down well with the rugby team. The usual slut whispers began to get mentioned around C, amplified by the fact that the guy who joined in with us wasnt single.
Anyway, we were so comfortable with what we did, we went and did it again with him (once he was single) another 3 or 4 times.
Now - everything is good and we enjoy being here as long as it doesn't take over.
Assuming you are several years in to it now:
6. Have things changed in your dynamic? Eg, have your tastes changed?
We chose to experiment lots following the first one. We had a few more mmf's. We had two ffm threesomes but quickly discovered that C didn't enjoy watching D with other women.
Now, our first choice on here is mmf threesomes so we look for single men. Couples might be on the horizon but not planned for at the moment.
7. Who initiates meetings these days?
Always D.
8. How do both parties feel about the lifestyle now you are more worldly wise?
Not something we would ever tell our friends or family about. We keep this very discreet. The lifestyle is great though. It's nice to meet people of similar tastes, fantasies and experiences.
9. What wisdom would you offer to newbies?
Communicate, set boundaries, always talk about things between yourselves before a meet, only do what you are comfortable with. Finally, always find out what the other party wants as well. This might be just as much their fantasy as it is yours |
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We met at a swingers party. Had a great couple of years swinging together. Now he has decided he doesn't want sex any more but is happy for me to play on my own.
I think all swinging relationships are very different. |
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