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Single guy going to a club for the first time
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am considering going to a club for the first time but am nervous about going on my own.
I would love any help / advice or recommendations as to which club to attend and what I can expect.
I’m sure I am not the first guy to be in this situation so maybe you’re comments will not only help me but also others in the same situation. |
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Looking at your location I would definitely recommend the Attic, Derby on a friday or Saturday night (full club open). It was my first club and it's a good one. Also perfect for a single man to try for the first time as their is no membership and entry is a reasonable price (so nothing to lose really if it's not for you). They have a website if you want to check it out for details. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just mingle, don't isolate yourself, be respectful and as chatty as you feel comfortable with to everyone there, that's about it. Everyone is like minded so no need to feel nervous. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Looking at your location I would definitely recommend the Attic, Derby on a friday or Saturday night (full club open). It was my first club and it's a good one. Also perfect for a single man to try for the first time as their is no membership and entry is a reasonable price (so nothing to lose really if it's not for you). They have a website if you want to check it out for details. "
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just mingle, don't isolate yourself, be respectful and as chatty as you feel comfortable with to everyone there, that's about it. Everyone is like minded so no need to feel nervous. "
Thanks |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"Go to Chameleons in Darlaston.
Be respectful and remember if you are chatting to a couple, there are two of them."
We agree. I hate one of us being ignored and its a total turn of f. Manners and respect are definately more attractive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Club SX in Blackpool.
No membership fees.
Men welcome Friday's and Saturday's.
Extremely friendly club.
Great staff and guests x"
I need a road trip here I'd say |
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The first club I went to was Decadent Nights in Somerset, not far from where I live.
I got there early and they made me welcome, showed me around and gave me an idea of some basic "rules".
It was fairly mindblowing seeing the set up 
I treated it like a normal houseparty at first and just chatted with different people and as the night went on let people know if I fancied them until a lovely couple who were experienced in the "scene" invited me to one of the play rooms.
After that I had a lot more attention, I guess because the couple put in a good word for me as a guy who was comfortable being naked around other men and could have a laugh and hold a conversation - I got the impression some single men get stage fright
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Club SX in Blackpool.
No membership fees.
Men welcome Friday's and Saturday's.
Extremely friendly club.
Great staff and guests x
I need a road trip here I'd say"
Definitely. Guys are definitely welcome there |
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Been to 3 clubs but with a female. Best advice I can give you is to be chatty. Don’t look at the women like they are potential victims. So many fellas keep themselves to themselves then just expect to whip their cocks out in the play areas and get it touched. Have a chat with the women and the blokes they’re with. It’ll get you much further. You’ve got a great icebreaker in that you’re all in a sex club!!! But remember that just being there doesn’t give you a divine right to get laid |
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"The first club I went to was Decadent Nights in Somerset, not far from where I live.
I got there early and they made me welcome, showed me around and gave me an idea of some basic "rules".
It was fairly mindblowing seeing the set up
I treated it like a normal houseparty at first and just chatted with different people and as the night went on let people know if I fancied them until a lovely couple who were experienced in the "scene" invited me to one of the play rooms.
After that I had a lot more attention, I guess because the couple put in a good word for me as a guy who was comfortable being naked around other men and could have a laugh and hold a conversation - I got the impression some single men get stage fright
"
Absolutely spot on here. Go to enjoy the evening but don’t expect anything. Speak to both in a couple but wait for their invitation rather than being pushy. Be friendly without being a perv and you’ll get that nod.  |
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Some very good advice on here OP. I’ll add my two penneth.
Don’t stare at women like they are prey.
Don’t pester women if they haven’t given you eye contact.
Don’t follow people around the playrooms.
Don’t expect sex.
Do be polite and respectful.
Do take time to chat and get to know them a bit.
One last thing, do enjoy yourself and if you are lucky enough to be invited to a playroom make sure you perform....I’ve noticed lots of men in clubs get stage fright and that is not good.
Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some very good advice on here OP. I’ll add my two penneth.
Don’t stare at women like they are prey.
Don’t pester women if they haven’t given you eye contact.
Don’t follow people around the playrooms.
Don’t expect sex.
Do be polite and respectful.
Do take time to chat and get to know them a bit.
One last thing, do enjoy yourself and if you are lucky enough to be invited to a playroom make sure you perform....I’ve noticed lots of men in clubs get stage fright and that is not good.
Good luck. "
Thanks, some great advice |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
1) talk to people, just chat.....
2) don't be a tit!
the rest you can work out.....
seriously... just treat it like you would any night out... go with an open mind and no expectations |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Agree with above. No expectations and an open mind. If things happens great, if not, worst thing you’ll come out with is your mind made up if it’s worth another go or not.
Be friendly, open and yourself and see what comes of it. Do definitely be ready to be hanging around by yourself feeling a tit for 5-10mins though. Hope it goes well for you. |
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It really isn’t difficult or unusual.
Call the club first though, most have rules about single men.
Turn up clean and presentable. Follow club rules and social etiquette:you wouldn’t touch a stranger intimately in a bar without consent, don’t do it in a club.
Mingle, chat and socialise. Be polite. Ask nicely.
DON’T...letch, stare, help yourself or try to get away with something you know would be seen as offensive, get d*unk. |
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Below is what I posted yesterday on a thread asking pretty much the same question.
"When I first went to a club I was in my early 30's (yes it was a very long time ago)
A week beforehand I didn't even know that there was such a thing as a swinger club but I really wanted to go and take a look.
I parked up and when I walked up to the door I could see all the people in the street looking at me and pointing their fingers. They weren't really but that is how it felt, but hey ho I went for it.
I didn't know one person in the place but within 10/15 minutes I was chatting to a few others and joined in a game of pool. There were couples, other guys, and a couple of single women.
Within an hour of walking in the place I was in a private room fucking one of the single women.
That was over 30 years ago and I've never looked back.
Since then I must have been to swinger clubs well over 500 times (I had a few years out here and there) both as a couple and as a single guy.
Yes the first visit can be daunting but you have to just go for it. However sitting there staring at the bottom of your glass will get you nowhere. Use your personality, chat to people. Of course you will get some knock backs but the rewards for perseverance can be life changing.
Go for it." |
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Go to a club that is more like a traditional night club/pub not just a swinging club, One of the larger clubs more rooms bigger none playing areas etc
Somewhere you can mingle chat to people and dance without feeling any pressure to get naked,
If you don't end up playing you can still have a great night out |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really isn’t difficult or unusual.
Call the club first though, most have rules about single men.
Turn up clean and presentable. Follow club rules and social etiquette:you wouldn’t touch a stranger intimately in a bar without consent, don’t do it in a club.
Mingle, chat and socialise. Be polite. Ask nicely.
DON’T...letch, stare, help yourself or try to get away with something you know would be seen as offensive, get d*unk."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Am thinking of going a club myself but not sure as to where in the northwest the two closest are townhouse or amour any one know which one is best for single men |
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"I am considering going to a club for the first time but am nervous about going on my own.
I would love any help / advice or recommendations as to which club to attend and what I can expect.
I’m sure I am not the first guy to be in this situation so maybe you’re comments will not only help me but also others in the same situation. "
As you’ve been verified from (presumably) a private meet, I would suggest you visit a club for the first time with a lady friend. You will have far less nerves going in as a couple of mates, as you will have someone to ‘bounce off’ throughout the night, and you’ll not get the ‘Big Issue’ experience of being a single guy in a club. Be wary of club staff/event hosts ‘bigging up’ their scene; they’re just chasing the ‘Penis Pound’. Look for reviews left by single guys, and don’t be afraid to message them directly for their honest (and private) opinion |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I am considering going to a club for the first time but am nervous about going on my own.
I would love any help / advice or recommendations as to which club to attend and what I can expect.
I’m sure I am not the first guy to be in this situation so maybe you’re comments will not only help me but also others in the same situation.
As you’ve been verified from (presumably) a private meet, I would suggest you visit a club for the first time with a lady friend. You will have far less nerves going in as a couple of mates, as you will have someone to ‘bounce off’ throughout the night, and you’ll not get the ‘Big Issue’ experience of being a single guy in a club. Be wary of club staff/event hosts ‘bigging up’ their scene; they’re just chasing the ‘Penis Pound’. Look for reviews left by single guys, and don’t be afraid to message them directly for their honest (and private) opinion "
Great advice, I’ve been verified by a couple of guys so think I will still be going on my own lol but thank you |
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"I am considering going to a club for the first time but am nervous about going on my own.
I would love any help / advice or recommendations as to which club to attend and what I can expect.
I’m sure I am not the first guy to be in this situation so maybe you’re comments will not only help me but also others in the same situation.
As you’ve been verified from (presumably) a private meet, I would suggest you visit a club for the first time with a lady friend. You will have far less nerves going in as a couple of mates, as you will have someone to ‘bounce off’ throughout the night, and you’ll not get the ‘Big Issue’ experience of being a single guy in a club. Be wary of club staff/event hosts ‘bigging up’ their scene; they’re just chasing the ‘Penis Pound’. Look for reviews left by single guys, and don’t be afraid to message them directly for their honest (and private) opinion
Great advice, I’ve been verified by a couple of guys so think I will still be going on my own lol but thank you "
There’s nothing wrong with going in with a male friend either mate, better that than going in on your own |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I was in Gran Canaria about a month ago visiting a mate that's moved there recently for work.
Anyway I plucked up the courage to go out myself one night that he was working. This in itself being a first.
First few drinks were a bit strange, I wont lie but then I decided to go to the swingers club Secrets.
Best decision I ever made,nervous as hell but got a tour of the place by one of the staff and then got myself a drink at the bar. Got chatting to a few locals then a female at the other side of the bar made eye contact with me. We shared a drink before deciding to have some fun infront of 2 couples that were already playing... I had some more fun later in the night before leaving.
Best decision I ever made and I'd be kicking myself if I never just went for it.
What have you got too loose??
You'll probably never see these people again unles you click and keep in touch through here like I have.??
You only live once so go for it and dont have any regrets... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I am considering going to a club for the first time but am nervous about going on my own.
I would love any help / advice or recommendations as to which club to attend and what I can expect.
I’m sure I am not the first guy to be in this situation so maybe you’re comments will not only help me but also others in the same situation.
As you’ve been verified from (presumably) a private meet, I would suggest you visit a club for the first time with a lady friend. You will have far less nerves going in as a couple of mates, as you will have someone to ‘bounce off’ throughout the night, and you’ll not get the ‘Big Issue’ experience of being a single guy in a club. Be wary of club staff/event hosts ‘bigging up’ their scene; they’re just chasing the ‘Penis Pound’. Look for reviews left by single guys, and don’t be afraid to message them directly for their honest (and private) opinion
Great advice, I’ve been verified by a couple of guys so think I will still be going on my own lol but thank you
There’s nothing wrong with going in with a male friend either mate, better that than going in on your own "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I was in Gran Canaria about a month ago visiting a mate that's moved there recently for work.
Anyway I plucked up the courage to go out myself one night that he was working. This in itself being a first.
First few drinks were a bit strange, I wont lie but then I decided to go to the swingers club Secrets.
Best decision I ever made,nervous as hell but got a tour of the place by one of the staff and then got myself a drink at the bar. Got chatting to a few locals then a female at the other side of the bar made eye contact with me. We shared a drink before deciding to have some fun infront of 2 couples that were already playing... I had some more fun later in the night before leaving.
Best decision I ever made and I'd be kicking myself if I never just went for it.
What have you got too loose??
You'll probably never see these people again unles you click and keep in touch through here like I have.??
You only live once so go for it and dont have any regrets... "
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