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Fab clubs for single males
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Being a young single male (24)
It can be pretty daunting going to a fab meet or club by yourself when you dont know anyone there and most people are in couples or know other members.
Anyone have any suggestions for finding someone to go with or talking to people who are going before hand?
I went to a fetlife event a few years ago and was pretty awkward drinking by yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being a young single male (24)
It can be pretty daunting going to a fab meet or club by yourself when you dont know anyone there and most people are in couples or know other members.
Anyone have any suggestions for finding someone to go with or talking to people who are going before hand?
I went to a fetlife event a few years ago and was pretty awkward drinking by yourself "
Just post a similar question  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Past experience is you’re better off making conversation with the ladies as some guys will think they can catch the ghey chatting with a single guy or will be less chance he will get any action |
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Just to say - a lot of people don’t know each other in clubs, yes you get a few cliques but most will be happy to see a new face providing you make some effort to be sociable.
Secondly quite a few single ladies manage to pluck up the courage to go on their own, if they can do it....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be honest mate, pushing past that is just part and parcel of this whole scene.
There's a phrase performer-types sometimes use called 'getting out of your own head'. Things that seem terrifying the first time you do it become quickly less so
when you're not running through everything over and over again in your head and you're just reacting naturally. Trust me, once you get past the first 15 minutes you'll wonder what you were worried about.
That's the problem with getting outside your comfort zone is that it's, well, uncomfortable. The good side is it's almost always worth doing! |
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"To be honest mate, pushing past that is just part and parcel of this whole scene.
There's a phrase performer-types sometimes use called 'getting out of your own head'. Things that seem terrifying the first time you do it become quickly less so
when you're not running through everything over and over again in your head and you're just reacting naturally. Trust me, once you get past the first 15 minutes you'll wonder what you were worried about.
That's the problem with getting outside your comfort zone is that it's, well, uncomfortable. The good side is it's almost always worth doing! "
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By *osie xWoman
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
I go to Chams on my own, it's a bit daunting at first but you can arrange a meet and greet with the staff who are all really nice there.
You'll be skipping around the place in no time after that lol |
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"I go to Chams on my own, it's a bit daunting at first but you can arrange a meet and greet with the staff who are all really nice there.
You'll be skipping around the place in no time after that lol"
I think it’s easier if you’re a girl? |
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By *osie xWoman
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
"I go to Chams on my own, it's a bit daunting at first but you can arrange a meet and greet with the staff who are all really nice there.
You'll be skipping around the place in no time after that lol
I think it’s easier if you’re a girl?"
No always if you are shy.
Just be friendly and respectful and plenty will be happy to chat with you. |
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"Being a young single male (24)
It can be pretty daunting going to a fab meet or club by yourself when you dont know anyone there and most people are in couples or know other members.
Anyone have any suggestions for finding someone to go with or talking to people who are going before hand?
I went to a fetlife event a few years ago and was pretty awkward drinking by yourself "
When I first went to a club I was in my early 30's (yes it was a very long time ago)
A week beforehand I didn't even know that there was such a thing as a swinger club but I really wanted to go and take a look.
I parked up and when I walked up to the door I could see all the people in the street looking at me and pointing their fingers. They weren't really but that is how it felt, but hey ho I went for it.
I didn't know one person in the place but within 10/15 minutes I was chatting to a few others and joined in a game of pool. There were couples, other guys, and a couple of single women.
Within an hour of walking in the place I was in a private room fucking one of the single women.
That was over 30 years ago and I've never looked back.
Since then I must have been to swinger clubs well over 500 times (I had a few years out here and there) both as a couple and as a single guy.
Yes the first visit can be daunting but you have to just go for it. However sitting there staring at the bottom of your glass will get you nowhere. Use your personality, chat to people. Of course you will get some knock backs but the rewards for perseverance can be life changing.
Go for it. |
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"Past experience is you’re better off making conversation with the ladies as some guys will think they can catch the ghey chatting with a single guy or will be less chance he will get any action "
My club experiences have been quite the opposite, as it's usually other single guys I end up chatting with, because they are being avoided/ignored by couples and single females too. It just ends up like being down the pub chatting shit with your mates, only in your boxers  |
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"To be honest mate, pushing past that is just part and parcel of this whole scene.
There's a phrase performer-types sometimes use called 'getting out of your own head'. Things that seem terrifying the first time you do it become quickly less so
when you're not running through everything over and over again in your head and you're just reacting naturally. Trust me, once you get past the first 15 minutes you'll wonder what you were worried about.
That's the problem with getting outside your comfort zone is that it's, well, uncomfortable. The good side is it's almost always worth doing! "
Very true. Good post. |
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"Past experience is you’re better off making conversation with the ladies as some guys will think they can catch the ghey chatting with a single guy or will be less chance he will get any action
My club experiences have been quite the opposite, as it's usually other single guys I end up chatting with, because they are being avoided/ignored by couples and single females too. It just ends up like being down the pub chatting shit with your mates, only in your boxers "
I think that is partly right.
However in the early days I didn't mind chatting to other single guys.
At that time most of them were a lot more experienced than me, and I learned a lot. |
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"Past experience is you’re better off making conversation with the ladies as some guys will think they can catch the ghey chatting with a single guy or will be less chance he will get any action
My club experiences have been quite the opposite, as it's usually other single guys I end up chatting with, because they are being avoided/ignored by couples and single females too. It just ends up like being down the pub chatting shit with your mates, only in your boxers
I think that is partly right.
However in the early days I didn't mind chatting to other single guys.
At that time most of them were a lot more experienced than me, and I learned a lot."
I only visit clubs now, if I'm going with one of my lady friends, someone has arranged to meet me inside, or as a 'Plan b' if a private meet has been cancelled and I need some way of filling the evening. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Past experience is you’re better off making conversation with the ladies as some guys will think they can catch the ghey chatting with a single guy or will be less chance he will get any action "
This is why I would never go to a straight night, would only go to a bi one |
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