FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Swinging or a sex site?
Swinging or a sex site?
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Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site. |
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
I disagree. While there are some singles on here who are just using it as a hook up site in the way they would use tinder, I do think it is possible to be single and a swinger. Especially if you are looking to meet couples or attached people. Some singles also have the intention to continue swinging with a partner if they meet one. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site.
I disagree. While there are some singles on here who are just using it as a hook up site in the way they would use tinder, I do think it is possible to be single and a swinger. Especially if you are looking to meet couples or attached people. Some singles also have the intention to continue swinging with a partner if they meet one."
I’m not into just hook ups and I’m a single lady who enjoys the swinging lifestyle. I like to make friends as i go along but also value my independence |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s both. Explaining that I’m NOT using it as a hook-up site to people who don’t understand the difference is getting a bit old. I do wish there were more profiles looking for friendships AND sex, rather than just serial hook-ups. At the risk of sounding like ‘I remember when this all used to be carparks..’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s a swinging site, for me.
I’m single but still say I’m a swinger. I use it for club meets and to play with couples. I find many SM use it as a sex site and have no interest in swinging so I rarely meet off here. Everyone uses it their own way and that’s the best bit. |
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By *ez1987Man
over a year ago
Great Harwood, Blackburn |
Such a grey area am single and like to meet up with people for socials and a chat, then if anything come, from that it's a bonus.
If I do meet a partner through this site we will both know the openness that we both like to play with other people |
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
I don't agree, I've met some singles who really get it! They're gold dust on the scene! They know how to have fun, and give fun! And certainly the club scene wouldn't be the same without them! I salute them!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
It seems to me that there are more single men on here than anything else. Like a lot of the clubs.
It's annoying as fuck imo. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's primarily a swingers site but a lot of people use it as a sex site. There's not a great deal of difference anyway, swingers have sex do they not? There's room for everyone I think  "
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
Well I’m a swinger and have been for over seven years, but because I’m currently not in a couple does that mean you’d not class me as a swinger?!!! What a load of old tosh!!!
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
It’s an interesting idea. Don’t really agree because we know some fantastic singles as friends who are very much in the lifestyle (party animals etc).
The last part (unrealistic expectations) is of course true, about single men anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might get shot down for this, but imho it’s very simple.
If you’re single, you’re not a swinger.
That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.
I think a problem arises from singles with unrealistic expectations of the site."
|
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I really dislike the single/ couple divide.
I'm a reasonable person, apparently attractive, considerate, etc. I'm a bisexual woman.
"Singles are awful, dreadful, blah blah blah... Why can't we meet a unicorn?"
Some singles are bad. Some couples are bad! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really dislike the single/ couple divide.
I'm a reasonable person, apparently attractive, considerate, etc. I'm a bisexual woman.
"Singles are awful, dreadful, blah blah blah... Why can't we meet a unicorn?"
Some singles are bad. Some couples are bad! "
Well said |
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"
I disagree. While there are some singles on here who are just using it as a hook up site in the way they would use tinder, I do think it is possible to be single and a swinger. Especially if you are looking to meet couples or attached people. Some singles also have the intention to continue swinging with a partner if they meet one."
The term “swinger” was first used to describe a couple who chose a non monogamous relationship, I.e, they have sex with others.
By definition, you can’t be single and be a swinger. It requires a partner.
Over time, singles looking for nsa sex have adopted the term swinger, that doesn’t mean they are swingers in the true sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think it matters. As long as everyone is respectful of each other's way of using the site. "
Completely this. There’s such a vast variety of people on here and it caters to so many individual wants and needs. Just go with it OP x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So am I a swinger ?
Now I’m confused....
I’m single
I’ve visited clubs....
I’ve done this with boyfriends and without
Had the FWB thing
Not done this In a real relationship
But I would be open to trying it......
Hmmm
Room for everyone I think.
We’re all awesome.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really dislike the single/ couple divide.
I'm a reasonable person, apparently attractive, considerate, etc. I'm a bisexual woman.
"Singles are awful, dreadful, blah blah blah... Why can't we meet a unicorn?"
Some singles are bad. Some couples are bad! "
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
I think it’s a sex site. For some that’s in the form of swinging and for others it’s just a place to get together for sex initially. There is room for us all I think
My description would always be that it’s a sex site. |
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"
I disagree. While there are some singles on here who are just using it as a hook up site in the way they would use tinder, I do think it is possible to be single and a swinger. Especially if you are looking to meet couples or attached people. Some singles also have the intention to continue swinging with a partner if they meet one.
The term “swinger” was first used to describe a couple who chose a non monogamous relationship, I.e, they have sex with others.
By definition, you can’t be single and be a swinger. It requires a partner.
Over time, singles looking for nsa sex have adopted the term swinger, that doesn’t mean they are swingers in the true sense. "
This is correct. However not every couple wants to meet another couple, Many want a single male or female & without the singles, It wouldn`t be quite the same. Technically singles are not swingers but are a vital part of the scene. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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swinging and sex go hand in hand so technically its both just depends on what type of swinging you want to indulge in under the swinging scene's umbrella.
swinging being just a couples scene is so outdated now that was so 1960 to 1990s now swinging is anyone who joins in... |
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"
I disagree. While there are some singles on here who are just using it as a hook up site in the way they would use tinder, I do think it is possible to be single and a swinger. Especially if you are looking to meet couples or attached people. Some singles also have the intention to continue swinging with a partner if they meet one.
The term “swinger” was first used to describe a couple who chose a non monogamous relationship, I.e, they have sex with others.
By definition, you can’t be single and be a swinger. It requires a partner.
Over time, singles looking for nsa sex have adopted the term swinger, that doesn’t mean they are swingers in the true sense. "
While for some people they have parts of their lives when they swing and parts of their lives they don't, I think others see it as part of their identity whether they are in a relationship at the time or not. The same way that a bisexual person is still bisexual even if in a heterosexual, monogamous relationship. In a similar way, I would still call myself polyamorous even if I was single. |
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid "
your a swinger .... end of |
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"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid "
I really hope that wasn’t directed at us.
Nothing entitled about us, merely explaining what the term “swinger “ means. We have no problem with singles, they are an integral part of the scene.
In answer to your question, correct,
couple = swinging
Single = single looking for nsa sex
Really not sure why some people get so bent out of shape about labels, what does it matter? If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy. |
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"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid
I really hope that wasn’t directed at us.
Nothing entitled about us, merely explaining what the term “swinger “ means. We have no problem with singles, they are an integral part of the scene.
In answer to your question, correct,
couple = swinging
Single = single looking for nsa sex
Really not sure why some people get so bent out of shape about labels, what does it matter? If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy."
Just a wee bit patronising to the single people on the site. |
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It's a site for swingers looking for sex!
Single, couple, throuple or more!
What it's not is a dating site! So many single female profiles have lots of demands, for drinks / dinning, socials and " connections". That's dating, not nsa swinging with sex. |
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"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid
I really hope that wasn’t directed at us.
Nothing entitled about us, merely explaining what the term “swinger “ means. We have no problem with singles, they are an integral part of the scene.
In answer to your question, correct,
couple = swinging
Single = single looking for nsa sex
Really not sure why some people get so bent out of shape about labels, what does it matter? If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy.
Just a wee bit patronising to the single people on the site."
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
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"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid
I really hope that wasn’t directed at us.
Nothing entitled about us, merely explaining what the term “swinger “ means. We have no problem with singles, they are an integral part of the scene.
In answer to your question, correct,
couple = swinging
Single = single looking for nsa sex
Really not sure why some people get so bent out of shape about labels, what does it matter? If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy.
Just a wee bit patronising to the single people on the site.
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy." |
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"
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy.""
And if you read our previous posts you will see that we said exactly that.
Really think some people here need to use google, Wikipedia has a very informative page, “swinging (sexual practice), it explains all.
You’re welcome
Happy swinging
  |
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"
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy."
And if you read our previous posts you will see that we said exactly that.
Really think some people here need to use google, Wikipedia has a very informative page, “swinging (sexual practice), it explains all.
You’re welcome
Happy swinging
"
I was quoting you! That is why you said exactly that. You wanted to know what part was patronising. You have since added more however. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy."
And if you read our previous posts you will see that we said exactly that.
Really think some people here need to use google, Wikipedia has a very informative page, “swinging (sexual practice), it explains all.
You’re welcome
Happy swinging
"
I think the swinging scene has evolved and so the definition of swinging should also change.
To be honest, there are quite a few couples like you who seem to think that singles are just people you've invited into the scene as an accessory to your sex life. I go to swingers clubs and if I ever chose to enter into a relationship it would be with a fellow swinger and I would continue swinging, I think swinging is more about your attitude to sex than your relationship status. |
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"
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy."
And if you read our previous posts you will see that we said exactly that.
Really think some people here need to use google, Wikipedia has a very informative page, “swinging (sexual practice), it explains all.
You’re welcome
Happy swinging
I was quoting you! That is why you said exactly that. You wanted to know what part was patronising. You have since added more however."
Gotcha, Apologies if that came across as patronising, it wasn’t meant to be |
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"
To be honest, there are quite a few couples like you who seem to think that singles are just people you've invited into the scene as an accessory to your sex life. "
Now that’s patronising.
If you actually knew us, you’d realise how wide of the mark that statement actually is.
We don’t see anyone as an accessory, we see people we meet through swinging as people, wether they are a couple or single. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"
To be honest, there are quite a few couples like you who seem to think that singles are just people you've invited into the scene as an accessory to your sex life.
Now that’s patronising.
If you actually knew us, you’d realise how wide of the mark that statement actually is.
We don’t see anyone as an accessory, we see people we meet through swinging as people, wether they are a couple or single."
'That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.'
You said yourself that singles have a place here if couples want to include them. So if couples didn't honour us with their invitations, we wouldn't have a place here?
I'm telling you that's wrong.
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"
I really think you’ve taken our post out of context, what’s patronising?
"If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy."
And if you read our previous posts you will see that we said exactly that.
Really think some people here need to use google, Wikipedia has a very informative page, “swinging (sexual practice), it explains all.
You’re welcome
Happy swinging
I was quoting you! That is why you said exactly that. You wanted to know what part was patronising. You have since added more however.
Gotcha, Apologies if that came across as patronising, it wasn’t meant to be"
If you tell people that they are wrong in how they identify themselves and basically say " I'll let you call yourself that if it makes you happy but you're still wrong" then that is not only a bit rude but it implies that you have superior knowledge and everyone else is less knowledgeable. Directing people to Wikipedia followed by "your welcome" is also rude as it is the first result you get when you Google anything and anyone who manages to use this site I would assume is perfectly capable of finding that themselves. Wikipedia is also an incredibly unreliable source of information as you can edit if yourself. I could edit the Wikipedia page to say that swinging is rubbing two coconuts together. The Oxford dictionary definition is "a person who engages in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners". The Merriam Webster dictionary definition simply says "one who engages freely in sex". The Macmillan dictionary definition is "someone who exchanges sexual partners with others". None of those specify that you have to be in a relationship. Other definitions do mention couples. The Collins dictionary specifies married couples. I'm sure many on here would disagree that you have to be married to swing. All the various definitions prove is that there isn't a rigid definition so nobody can claim to know it. These things evolve over time anyway. Relationships don't work the way they did a few decades ago when people got married younger and had fewer relationships before marriage. A lot of my generation are choosing not to even getting married at all. As relationships change, what is considered swinging will change. There will also always be grey areas as life is rarely black and white. It's interesting really. |
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"
To be honest, there are quite a few couples like you who seem to think that singles are just people you've invited into the scene as an accessory to your sex life.
Now that’s patronising.
If you actually knew us, you’d realise how wide of the mark that statement actually is.
We don’t see anyone as an accessory, we see people we meet through swinging as people, wether they are a couple or single.
'That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.'
You said yourself that singles have a place here if couples want to include them. So if couples didn't honour us with their invitations, we wouldn't have a place here?
I'm telling you that's wrong.
"
Honour with their invitations????
Let’s nip this in the bud.
This is exactly why we choose to only meet people face to face and not via fab, things get perceived incorrectly, people have different opinions and make assumptions.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wow! This thread showed some true colours.
What does it matter to others how people use the site or what they call themselves. Surely we find fabbers who want similar things.
I’ve used it for swinging, 1:1, dates and other combinations. I know couples who use it to date other couples: wine n dine, meet singles, hot wife etc... let’s just have fun and be respectful.
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"
To be honest, there are quite a few couples like you who seem to think that singles are just people you've invited into the scene as an accessory to your sex life.
Now that’s patronising.
If you actually knew us, you’d realise how wide of the mark that statement actually is.
We don’t see anyone as an accessory, we see people we meet through swinging as people, wether they are a couple or single.
'That doesn’t mean there’s no place for singles on here, some couples want to involve a single.'
You said yourself that singles have a place here if couples want to include them. So if couples didn't honour us with their invitations, we wouldn't have a place here?
I'm telling you that's wrong.
Honour with their invitations????
Let’s nip this in the bud.
This is exactly why we choose to only meet people face to face and not via fab, things get perceived incorrectly, people have different opinions and make assumptions.
"
I don't see how I perceived anything incorrectly, I directly quoted you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wow! This thread showed some true colours.
What does it matter to others how people use the site or what they call themselves. Surely we find fabbers who want similar things.
I’ve used it for swinging, 1:1, dates and other combinations. I know couples who use it to date other couples: wine n dine, meet singles, hot wife etc... let’s just have fun and be respectful.
"
and chat about the differences of opinions in forums   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wow! This thread showed some true colours.
What does it matter to others how people use the site or what they call themselves. Surely we find fabbers who want similar things.
I’ve used it for swinging, 1:1, dates and other combinations. I know couples who use it to date other couples: wine n dine, meet singles, hot wife etc... let’s just have fun and be respectful.
and chat about the differences of opinions in forums "
As long as we don’t batter others with them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So if someone is in a relationship and as a couple they were swinging, but then split up they are no longer swingers?
As a unicorn I can really understand why some couples find us hard to find. Because some couples are entitled f**king idiots!!
At least giving their opinions on here shows us who to avoid
I really hope that wasn’t directed at us.
Nothing entitled about us, merely explaining what the term “swinger “ means. We have no problem with singles, they are an integral part of the scene.
In answer to your question, correct,
couple = swinging
Single = single looking for nsa sex
Really not sure why some people get so bent out of shape about labels, what does it matter? If you’re single and want to call yourself a swinger, go for it if it makes you happy.
Just a wee bit patronising to the single people on the site."
Im single but I’m still a swinger, I’m certainly not keen on the quick leg over style stuff |
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"A site is a site. Some people have a strange ability to use any site as a sex site.
True that. Friends of mine have had people try to chat them up on LinkedIn  "
I get randomers trying to pick me up on my bloody fitbit. At least 2 or 3 friend requests a week, and if I accept I get bombarded with messages.
I appreciate accepting would raise my heart rate and presumably burn some calories, but seriously?  |
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"A site is a site. Some people have a strange ability to use any site as a sex site.
True that. Friends of mine have had people try to chat them up on LinkedIn
I get randomers trying to pick me up on my bloody fitbit. At least 2 or 3 friend requests a week, and if I accept I get bombarded with messages.
I appreciate accepting would raise my heart rate and presumably burn some calories, but seriously? "
If it wasn't so creepy it would be hilarious. |
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"It's primarily a swingers site but a lot of people use it as a sex site. There's not a great deal of difference anyway, swingers have sex do they not? There's room for everyone I think "
Swinging and sex sites are completely different.....well it used to be!!!! |
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Some interesting viewpoints there from everyone . I find it a bit ironic that if the site did stick to the ' only cples can be swingers' rule and the singles couldn't be classed as swingers then I would think the membership numbers would drop by a very large amount overnight and could even close the swingers place down .
Arguably it is the beleaguered unwanted singles who kind of keep the site profitable / open for the couple's maybe ?
Though it's just a case of everyone respecting each others suggested identity / label is all that matters really isn't it
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