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Oral.. female receiving.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have noticed a few times that women say they dont like it.. now I often tell a meet I dont.. Which isnt strictly true.
Under the right circumstances, with the right person I love it.. but find myself freezing if a guy starts to do it..
Now I am thinking its because I know its the one way that I could potentially orgasm wildy with a meet ( something I dont think I have ever done)
So if a guy does do it I spend the whole time thinking.. I.m not cumming.. and actually I refuse mostly now because I can wreck the whole playtime.
So is there any other women that ENJOY oral ( as when my Master does it I love it ) but can get almost panicked when a meet does it..
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Its not that simple..Master may wish me to lay back and enjoy.. and that is what in that case I will do.
I am quite capable of moving.. but just about every message I get a guy wants to do this.. and I am shooing away meets because I tell them I dont like it..
However Master was talking to me and I do like it.. and its not just strangers.. I have been like this with men all my life.
Love it but refuse to let guys do it..and the moment it starts to get a real response I will stop..and have sex rather than lay there and enjoy it.
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So Cali, does this mean you have your Masters permission to enjoy it and are stopping yourself, is that what you mean?"
Yes.. Master actually loves to see it.. but last person that did..was really good at it.. but I just got aggitated.. and felt myself getting close to cumming so got the play over and done with.
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So Cali, does this mean you have your Masters permission to enjoy it and are stopping yourself, is that what you mean?
Yes.. Master actually loves to see it.. but last person that did..was really good at it.. but I just got aggitated.. and felt myself getting close to cumming so got the play over and done with.
Cali "
So why are you so uncomfortable that you stop them? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I love oral probably more than anything else I do. My dom is by far the best at it. But I can't quite tip over the edge. It makes me ejaculate like a fool though. I love anyone who can do it well. Not many people are very good though sadly, or I am very difficult. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
So why are you so uncomfortable that you stop them?
because I will if I orgasm like that be rather spectacular.. lol
Cali "
I so wish I could do this! Gosh, do it!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
So why are you so uncomfortable that you stop them?
because I will if I orgasm like that be rather spectacular.. lol
Cali "
And thats a bad thing?
Sorry if I can't quite understand what you are getting at, I love receiving oral and cumming with people, its just a rarity for me to cum with just oral, thats all.. and surely having a meet with someone Really good at it, is a bonus! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
And thats a bad thing?
Sorry if I can't quite understand what you are getting at, I love receiving oral and cumming with people, its just a rarity for me to cum with just oral, thats all.. and surely having a meet with someone Really good at it, is a bonus!"
yes and no.. I dont like cumming with a meet.. its not that I cant.. more that I often wont.. I have of late been getting over this more and more..
I just wondered if some of the ladies that dont like it could shed any light on why they dont.. maybe there is a trigger I have not thought of..
Things so far we have thought of is
a) I see it as losing control.. Something I dislike doing with other people. Sex for me is very much about the pleasure I give to my Master watching and the guy getting.
b) Worrying about bodily noises... how wet I can get.. the fact its the one way that may make me gush that I cant control..
c) My ex used to tell me it was nasty to do it .. so maybe I am worried about that.
d) I feel vunerable if I orgasm fully..
There are loads of reasons.. but the fact is for some reason I get very off if someone offers to do something I enjoy..
Being that I am very critical of myself I figured I maybe missing something really really obvious. lol
Cali |
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It's my favorite because it can be very controlling.
Eye contact is important i think, so what i try and do is get them to watch by stuffing a pillow under there bum or ordering them to get get those legs open wider...
It's a nice feeling when they start bucking and wriggling like a worm-i dont like to let go though, i wait just till the right time when there legs turn to butter then flip em around and give them a hard and fast fucking from behind.
Hope this helps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have noticed a few times that women say they dont like it.. now I often tell a meet I dont.. Which isnt strictly true.
Under the right circumstances, with the right person I love it.. but find myself freezing if a guy starts to do it..
Now I am thinking its because I know its the one way that I could potentially orgasm wildy with a meet ( something I dont think I have ever done)
So if a guy does do it I spend the whole time thinking.. I.m not cumming.. and actually I refuse mostly now because I can wreck the whole playtime.
So is there any other women that ENJOY oral ( as when my Master does it I love it ) but can get almost panicked when a meet does it..
Cali "
why would you try and stop yourself from orgasuming? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can understand this a bit, I think. I find it hard to really let go and enjoy, with someone new. I suppose I feel a little self-conscious.... and it is also about feeling a bit vulnerable. Also, like you, I'm more comfortable giving pleasure, and I feel in my 'element' when doing this! So it still takes me a while to relax and be pleasured!!  x |
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Well with no disrespect to the master sub dynamic you are subjecting your self to a willing deprivation of self control. Thus your control of your orgasm is extremely focused giving up this control to a stranger would feel like you have failed with your own will power and thus any possible pleasure would be damned by the perceived failure of loosing your control of the situation
It does not seem to me that you have missed the reason |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's my favorite because it can be very controlling.
Eye contact is important i think, so what i try and do is get them to watch by stuffing a pillow under there bum or ordering them to get get those legs open wider...
It's a nice feeling when they start bucking and wriggling like a worm-i dont like to let go though, i wait just till the right time when there legs turn to butter then flip em around and give them a hard and fast fucking from behind.
Hope this helps"
See I am thinking that is what it is.. NO other man controls me.... so may explain why I have issues with it.. but I also wouldnt let a guy be in control like that. lol
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
why would you try and stop yourself from orgasuming? "
Because I am strange and like to give lol.. I think its to do with being a cum slut.. maybe I feel guilty GETTING pleasure.. weird because Master gives me massive amounts and I never moan..okay I do..
I am actually thinking that this is definately a control issue.. that I wont give up my control to another..
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not that keen on receiving oral as it doesn't really do anything for me. Sometimes it's ok.
I'm with you on the 'not cumming' thing. Well kind of. I have never cum with anyone else. I do have kind of a full body orgasm with my fb but it kind of sends my brain to mush for a while and I have to recover before I can walk or talk.  I don't mind that with him, but I think not being able to cum with anyone else is kind of a control thing similar to what you describe. It makes me feel vulnerable. So I just can't.
It doesn't bother me, I still totally enjoy sex. I just really hate when blokes go on about it saying they will make me cum. I'm like "don't bother trying!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
why would you try and stop yourself from orgasuming?
Because I am strange and like to give lol.. I think its to do with being a cum slut.. maybe I feel guilty GETTING pleasure.. weird because Master gives me massive amounts and I never moan..okay I do..
I am actually thinking that this is definately a control issue.. that I wont give up my control to another..
Cali "
Agree! As long as it doesn't bother you then it's ok. It might help now you kind of figured it out? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm not that keen on receiving oral as it doesn't really do anything for me. Sometimes it's ok.
I'm with you on the 'not cumming' thing. Well kind of. I have never cum with anyone else. I do have kind of a full body orgasm with my fb but it kind of sends my brain to mush for a while and I have to recover before I can walk or talk. I don't mind that with him, but I think not being able to cum with anyone else is kind of a control thing similar to what you describe. It makes me feel vulnerable. So I just can't.
It doesn't bother me, I still totally enjoy sex. I just really hate when blokes go on about it saying they will make me cum. I'm like "don't bother trying!""
Oh see this so sounds like me.. oral is the one thing that another could do to me that could give me a what I would call full on orgasm.
I have little ones through many other things.. I love sex and love giving oral to guys... but I think it is the vulnerabilty part...
Cali |
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By *ewels74Woman
over a year ago
Dundee/Angus/Blackpool |
"
And thats a bad thing?
Sorry if I can't quite understand what you are getting at, I love receiving oral and cumming with people, its just a rarity for me to cum with just oral, thats all.. and surely having a meet with someone Really good at it, is a bonus!
yes and no.. I dont like cumming with a meet.. its not that I cant.. more that I often wont.. I have of late been getting over this more and more..
I just wondered if some of the ladies that dont like it could shed any light on why they dont.. maybe there is a trigger I have not thought of..
Things so far we have thought of is
a) I see it as losing control.. Something I dislike doing with other people. Sex for me is very much about the pleasure I give to my Master watching and the guy getting.
b) Worrying about bodily noises... how wet I can get.. the fact its the one way that may make me gush that I cant control..
c) My ex used to tell me it was nasty to do it .. so maybe I am worried about that.
d) I feel vunerable if I orgasm fully..
There are loads of reasons.. but the fact is for some reason I get very off if someone offers to do something I enjoy..
Being that I am very critical of myself I figured I maybe missing something really really obvious. lol
Cali "
Hi there
I love giving and recieving oral very much and have to say recieving oral is something i enjoy a lot and i do know how you feel about not losing control i used to yrs ago feel the same when i was with my ex around 10 yrs ago or so and when i told him that i came really really hard and refused to let go of the control.
i felt all the time, he kind of told me not to feel that way and just to let go, i love to cum when im alone, but the more he was gentle with me the more i relaxed and yes like you i gush when i cum and i mean multi gush but i was told to not feel so embarrassed with it so anyways i digress
I recently had a meet with someone who adores it that i gush and he kinda did make gush over and over like a multitude of times, but i have learned to relax now and totally enjoy it, but im still freaked out from time to time that i will be overly too self concious, to me even though its sexual meet with folk we dont know and this is why i like to get to know people for a long time before i meet them, you get to know each others likes and you relax more with them as well....thats my opinion anyways and i have to be honest that i cum more through oral and it would be more of a challenge for someone to make me cum through penetration i think
Sorry for rambling on and to feel vulnerable is something that does happen from time to time, you dont want the meet to see the real you i guess and want to hide away - basically im guessing you dont like letting go as well
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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see i agree with alot of the posts here. I very rarely enjoy receiving oral sex, its pleasant enough but it never makes me cum, i cum through penetration, so for me its kinda a non starter.
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"I have noticed a few times that women say they dont like it.. now I often tell a meet I dont.. Which isnt strictly true.
Under the right circumstances, with the right person I love it.. but find myself freezing if a guy starts to do it..
Now I am thinking its because I know its the one way that I could potentially orgasm wildy with a meet ( something I dont think I have ever done)
So if a guy does do it I spend the whole time thinking.. I.m not cumming.. and actually I refuse mostly now because I can wreck the whole playtime.
So is there any other women that ENJOY oral ( as when my Master does it I love it ) but can get almost panicked when a meet does it..
Cali
why would you try and stop yourself from orgasuming? "
When a man starts to orgasm a train wouldn't be able to stop him |
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No, i dont enjoy it with men other than kev cos they are rarely as good. There is a part of me that has trouble relaxing enough , but some of that is because i would rather be doing other things having had too many men lap away like a hungry labrador.
My biggest orgasms are definatly not from oral though...
It does sound like it is a control thing for you Cali, you probably know the biggest thing stopping anyone cumming is theur mind. |
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I never used to understand why a man would find it enjoyable. Couldn't for the life of me understand it, therefore hated it.
Then I met someone who very clearly enjoyed it and almost immediately, got over my dislike and embarrassment of it.
I had to get over a lot to enjoy sex, being naked (used to terrify me) touching myself (catholic guilt) Oral (why would a guy want to do that?!) but now I have? LOVING it all! |
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I think you already know...
Knowing a little about the type of relationship you have I would bet a lot of money it is A).
Done right oral can be fantastic and the fastest route to losing control. But you chose to give that control to one man... Your master.
I think your subconscious is telling you that if you relax and let it happen then you are voluntarily giving control to another man which you also know, you absolutely cannot do without either your master giving you permission or seriously weakening your bond with your master in your own mind.
By relaxing and having a powerful orgasm especially when you are in a relatively passive position, involving the right people can be as much of a power swap mentally as anything else.
My question is this... What if your master tells you to take it and let go, simply because it will please him and he likes to see his slave out of control.
If it were me I would know that it would mean nothing because I told you to do it so no matter what anyone else feels or thinks that control is still mine.
In this case your master would know that and so would you either consciously or sub-consciously.
And of course if your master feels you are holding out on him that can lead to all kinds of trouble for you I'm sure  
From my very limited knowledge on the subject that's my view lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thing is I've been told to enjoy.. to take the pleasure my master gives me... And with all other types of play I can do this..
So I know that's part of it... But my own hang ups on this even with a direct order make it hard to do So... I just kinda endure it for longer then...
Talking with my master and reading this thread its a mix of the loss of control but mostly the vulnerability aspect.
So at least now we can work on it... Had to explain how I could feel vulnerable but now I have I think its helped us both...
If I didn't like it or all the guys were rubbish at it I could understand... But I've been lucky and met some guys that were good. I just wouldn't enjoy it.
Cali |
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"Thing is I've been told to enjoy.. to take the pleasure my master gives me... And with all other types of play I can do this..
So I know that's part of it... But my own hang ups on this even with a direct order make it hard to do So... I just kinda endure it for longer then...
Talking with my master and reading this thread its a mix of the loss of control but mostly the vulnerability aspect.
So at least now we can work on it... Had to explain how I could feel vulnerable but now I have I think its helped us both...
If I didn't like it or all the guys were rubbish at it I could understand... But I've been lucky and met some guys that were good. I just wouldn't enjoy it.
Cali "
That makes sense. Especially as it was something that was occurring before your current relationship.
It would also explain why you can't fully let go when told to aswell.
Good luck with working on it....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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not sure if this is what you mean but I only ever enjoy oral with a man I have a strong emotional attachement to, never just a meet. Can't explain why but just don't like it no matter how good they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i get paranoid incase i smell bad (even tho im always scrubbed clean for a meet) or i dont taste good which makes me either end the licking quickly or refusing in the first place. do any other girls feel like that or am i just being weird, lol
oops, feeling i shouldnt have asked that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i get paranoid incase i smell bad (even tho im always scrubbed clean for a meet) or i dont taste good which makes me either end the licking quickly or refusing in the first place. do any other girls feel like that or am i just being weird, lol
oops, feeling i shouldnt have asked that!"
Not weird at all, doesnt help the amount of threads on here about minging mineges  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i get paranoid incase i smell bad (even tho im always scrubbed clean for a meet) or i dont taste good which makes me either end the licking quickly or refusing in the first place. do any other girls feel like that or am i just being weird, lol
oops, feeling i shouldnt have asked that!"
It's valid.. I get the same sometimes. Wonder if its part of it. We have decided to get someone we trust to work with us on this.. slowly and someone we can explain the whole issue to.
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Does nothing for me...
And it riles me when guys say "You just haven't had it done right"!...................PISS OFF "
See if it did nothing for me I could accept that lol
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never used to understand why a man would find it enjoyable. Couldn't for the life of me understand it, therefore hated it.
Then I met someone who very clearly enjoyed it and almost immediately, got over my dislike and embarrassment of it.
I had to get over a lot to enjoy sex, being naked (used to terrify me) touching myself (catholic guilt) Oral (why would a guy wTant to do that?!) but now I have? LOVING it all! "
U sound just like me but I am not catholic!
It wasn't until I met kev last year that I discovered how enjoyable a good bit of oral can be and now I totally adore it x  |
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"I never used to understand why a man would find it enjoyable. Couldn't for the life of me understand it, therefore hated it.
Then I met someone who very clearly enjoyed it and almost immediately, got over my dislike and embarrassment of it.
I had to get over a lot to enjoy sex, being naked (used to terrify me) touching myself (catholic guilt) Oral (why would a guy wTant to do that?!) but now I have? LOVING it all!
U sound just like me but I am not catholic!
It wasn't until I met kev last year that I discovered how enjoyable a good bit of oral can be and now I totally adore it x "
Ohhh kev never told me he had met you, he is good isnt he |
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I like oral... it's OK and feels nice........ for a while.
I never cum from oral alone and can get bored and uncomfortable when it goes on too long.
Also, I find if you don't start moaning and groaning and just lay there and actually enjoy the sensation, a lot of guys think you are not enjoying it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never used to understand why a man would find it enjoyable. Couldn't for the life of me understand it, therefore hated it.
Then I met someone who very clearly enjoyed it and almost immediately, got over my dislike and embarrassment of it.
I had to get over a lot to enjoy sex, being naked (used to terrify me) touching myself (catholic guilt) Oral (why would a guy wTant to do that?!) but now I have? LOVING it all!
U sound just like me but I am not catholic!
It wasn't until I met kev last year that I discovered how enjoyable a good bit of oral can be and now I totally adore it x
Ohhh kev never told me he had met you, he is good isnt he "
I always think the same when I see u mention Kev! Makes me grin! Mind u, if u were closer I would hound u till I met u! Lol xxx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Things so far we have thought of is
a) I see it as losing control.. Something I dislike doing with other people. Sex for me is very much about the pleasure I give to my Master watching and the guy getting.
I understand that your master gets pleasure from watching you receive oral and from your pleasure...Can you see this rather than loosing control more about being in control of ensuring your Master gets pleasure in watching?
b) Worrying about bodily noises... how wet I can get.. the fact its the one way that may make me gush that I cant control..
I understand about the bodily noises, we all make them and they are completely normally. Regarding how wet, that is a compliment to the person you are with as your subconscious is preparing your body for intimate encounters and you are turned on...and as for gushing, from my understanding off guys, to be able to make a women gush is a huge achievement and a compliment to how skilful they are.
c) My ex used to tell me it was nasty to do it .. so maybe I am worried about that.
This for me is where you need to focus on letting go, not in the sense of loosing control, but rather letting go of the control your ex has on you still. I'm sure yor Master won't like the thought of another having a mental hold on your ability to let yourself enjoy something, which you clearly do.
An ex once told me that I took ages to cum from oral sex and that for me ruined receiving oral sex for years It wasn't until I met someone (from here in fact) that loved giving it, and would happily spend most of the night between my legs!!! Until then I used to control my enjoyment for a matter of minutes before pushing him off and getting on with other stuff.
d) I feel vunerable if I orgasm fully..
Being vulnerable is actually very powerful and beautiful.
There are loads of reasons.. but the fact is for some reason I get very off if someone offers to do something I enjoy..
Being that I am very critical of myself I figured I maybe missing something really really obvious. lol
Learn to love your body, all the imperfections and assets equally...you will become less critical...and in more control of your enjoyment
Gx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I do love my body... Master and I have worked out what we will try to do..
It maybe a simple case of this is something that we keep for ourselves..
I do not like feeling vunerable though.... and I think in the end that may prove to be the thing that stops me getting over this.
I can have my Master make me feel ultimate vulnerable and love it.. but its in a different way with oral..
I can get quite emotional if I orgasm from oral... as its very intense... and that is not something I wish to share with another man... I think I may learn to enjoy it till a certain point..
I rarely orgasm with a meet anyway... its not about that for me.. Its about pleasure for me and my Master and getting the cum..
We are going to try a few experiments and see if it can be got over..
One thing I noticed from another thread though is I tend to see sex with a meet as wham bam thank you maam.. and maybe I find oral to intimate...
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't mind if you come or not..
But I bet you'll have my hand in a cum-grip before I come up for air lol "
See that's the attitude a lot of us women find tiresome... I can not cum if I don't want to...
Cali |
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