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Slut shaming ,,,

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thoughts. Does it still happen ?

Does it colour your opinion of someone how often they’ve ADMITTED to meeting?

Is it only women who are judged ?

Enquiring mind needs to know ? Xx

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By *sGivesWoodWoman  over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

[Removed by poster at 05/10/19 14:10:03]

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By *sGivesWoodWoman  over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Generally women who are shamed in this way, blokes seem to get a pat on the back.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Isn’t it only shaming if you shout about it though? I won’t meet people for lots of different reasons but I keep those reasons to myself. Not really anyone’s business what other people do. I haven’t seen much of it on here to be fair.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think both sexes get judged if they are VERY busy and don’t seem to have any criteria or threshold apart from ‘is living and has genitals’. No one wants to feel that they are just the next convenient warm body in a very long line.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

I've seen both men and women shamed for it before. Women do tend to get it far more often though.

The amount of people a person meets doesn't matter to me, how they go about it does.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

I dont know if im judged or not noone does it to my face

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've seen both men and women shamed for it before. Women do tend to get it far more often though.

The amount of people a person meets doesn't matter to me, how they go about it does."

Gorgeous pic Meli x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's an outdated way of thinkng. Just because people have had loads of partners it shouldn't change your opinion of them, as long as its safe and consentual sex then good for them

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Yes, it happens, and people assume anything and everything about those who meet a lot/ with lots of veris. I'm currently experimenting with hiding a lot of mine.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.


"I've seen both men and women shamed for it before. Women do tend to get it far more often though.

The amount of people a person meets doesn't matter to me, how they go about it does.

Gorgeous pic Meli x"

Thank you Nora.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why would someone Slut shame on a swinging site?

I thought swinging was about non monogamy.....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Generally women who are shamed in this way, blokes seem to get a pat on the back. "

This is true, annoys me this attitude

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster

From a tgurl perspective I get called a slut merely because I enjoy giving men sexual pleasures,it doesn't really bother me but I do get tired of hearing it from men on here

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

End of the day if i want to meet someone then i do whether they are a newbie or someone with loads of experience, it's all down to the connection between both parties

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By *uckslut and MCouple  over a year ago

Poole

I've heard that slut shaming happens in the vanilla world. It would never happen on here. After all we're swingers, we're clear on who and what we're all about. Take Fab straigh mt guys for example.

My username is Fuckslut. I am a slut, I take lots of cocks. Safe sex of course. I am an adult - sometimes and can make up my own mind. Apart from when Dom pulls rank

There are other girls on here that have been slut shamed as they take it all bearback. What's the diffrance?

I don't give 2 hoots if and what others think of me. They don't pay my bills. I have fun and enjoy what I do.

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By *uckslut and MCouple  over a year ago

Poole

Straight guys- type o

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley

Yeah, I've been given grief about how many verifications I've got, I don't really give a flying fuck lol.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It doesn't bother me about how many times girls have met x i know it bothers some guys x they love to read girls verifications but then for some reason it puts them off . I think it's the same with girls reading guys verifications too is it x

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By *lixir of lifeMan  over a year ago

knob Creek

My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x"

Why would it put you off?

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By *lixir of lifeMan  over a year ago

knob Creek


"My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x

Why would it put you off?"

In all honesty I’m not sure ..

I suppose as a guy I’d feel under pressure to perform and live upto what the lady is used to .

Us guys are fickle and like to think we’re the best or got the biggest cocks or the best bodies ..

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x

Why would it put you off?

In all honesty I’m not sure ..

I suppose as a guy I’d feel under pressure to perform and live upto what the lady is used to .

Us guys are fickle and like to think we’re the best or got the biggest cocks or the best bodies ..

"

Each to their own I guess.

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By *lixir of lifeMan  over a year ago

knob Creek


"My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x

Why would it put you off?

In all honesty I’m not sure ..

I suppose as a guy I’d feel under pressure to perform and live upto what the lady is used to .

Us guys are fickle and like to think we’re the best or got the biggest cocks or the best bodies ..

Each to their own I guess. "

Exactly that’s the beauty of this ..

I’m lucky and can afford to be choosey..

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman  over a year ago

all loved up


"Thoughts. Does it still happen ?

Does it colour your opinion of someone how often they’ve ADMITTED to meeting?

Is it only women who are judged ?

Enquiring mind needs to know ? Xx "

People try to judge and people do make assumptions

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By *acey_RedWoman  over a year ago

Liverpool

The most slut shaming I've experienced has been from either insecure male partners who have insisted they want to know how many people I've slept with or other women.

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By *acey_RedWoman  over a year ago

Liverpool


"My original profile had a lot of verifications on it .. when I was first single I was a child in a sweet shop, most were clubs or repeat meets and some were people I’d met who left and returned so verified me again .

I noticed that showing so many verifications or Atleast the summary worked against me .

So I started a new profile and I’m now very selective..

But if someone has a lot of verified meets it would put me off nowadays x

Why would it put you off?

In all honesty I’m not sure ..

I suppose as a guy I’d feel under pressure to perform and live upto what the lady is used to .

Us guys are fickle and like to think we’re the best or got the biggest cocks or the best bodies ..

"

I've had this, men intimidated by your "experience level". Honestly after about 5 it's all the same. The best people in bed are always the ones who listen to you and want to get to know what works for you. It's not about size or body.

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By *anther81Man  over a year ago

Drogheda

As a guy I never understand why girls get slut shamed while guys can do what they like.

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By *issyfaggotfayeTV/TS  over a year ago

Bolton

I'm not ashamed to be one

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By *akeyousmile30Man  over a year ago

greenwich

As far as I am concerned the more men a women has had the greater the attraction for me!!

My dream partner would be very greedy lady xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason. "

Why no more than 4? Just curious.

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By *apiomanMan  over a year ago

Shipley

I can’t believe we are even having to have this conversation on 2019. If someone, male, female or couple has had lots more sex with lots more people than I have, good for them. I hope every encounter was satisfying for all concerned. I think there is a strong element that some people get jealous of people who have more sex than we get.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Speaking as a bloke i couldnt care less how many partners youve had or verifications. If you seem a decent person then thats what matters.

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By *allySlinkyWoman  over a year ago

Leeds


"

Why no more than 4? Just curious."

I imagine most true swingers have more than 4 verifications.

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"

Why no more than 4? Just curious.

I imagine most true swingers have more than 4 verifications. "

Yeah, that's why I'm curious, most couples and single females have more than 4 lol.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Why no more than 4? Just curious."

jealousy simple

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By *akeyousmile30Man  over a year ago

greenwich

Thank you xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That's rich saying no more than 4 when you are hiding your profile

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By *rank speakerMan  over a year ago

Worcester


"Thoughts. Does it still happen ?

Does it colour your opinion of someone how often they’ve ADMITTED to meeting?

Is it only women who are judged ?

Enquiring mind needs to know ? Xx "

I'm pleased to see girls boldly declaring themselves more nowadays. After all we're on a swingers site??? On the other hand as individuals we have the choice to message or not? Another reason to READ THE PROFILE!)????

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By *lattyukbiMan  over a year ago

Rugby

Judge away... I’m content in my sexuality and my activities, if you don’t like it... go knitting instead!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thoughts. Does it still happen ?

Does it colour your opinion of someone how often they’ve ADMITTED to meeting?

Is it only women who are judged ?

Enquiring mind needs to know ? Xx "

as in a guy saying oh your such a slut in bed i love it ...

or saying to a guy no thanks and him say well fuck off the you dirty slut...

i no longer care either way as im happy with who i am if being a woman and on swinging/sex/dating site make me a slut then im hardly alone as there are zillions of us sluts (including male wanna be ones (fake profiles lol)

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By *otgirl32Woman  over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

I have been abused verbally (via messaging mostly) for my preferences. As the saying goes, who gives a fuck.

In the same context, the "cutest" slut shaming (wasn't really shaming) I had was with a youngie around 21 who outright asked me how many sex partners had I had in my life while we were half naked in bed. When I told him that obscene number (LOL) he literally started dressing up said he couldn't possibly compete. Ended up giving me one of the best fucks of my life !

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By *teve and mandyCouple  over a year ago

purley

I love being a well used slut for all to fuck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Why no more than 4? Just curious."

No more than 4 showing on their profile. Because me and they are not compatible.

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By *anther81Man  over a year ago

Drogheda


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason. "

Does that mean when/if you meet 5 people and get verified by them all you would be leaving Fab?

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By *allySlinkyWoman  over a year ago

Leeds


"

No more than 4 showing on their profile. Because me and they are not compatible. "

I could display only 3 verifications but have had sex with hundreds. How would you know ?

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By *hickennchipsWoman  over a year ago

up above the streets and houses

It makes no difference what people think of how many verifications I have, I’m too busy having fun to care

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It makes no difference what people think of how many verifications I have, I’m too busy having fun to care "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Humans are pre conditioned from an early that sex is a bad.

People's bodies are also sexualised in the same manner.

Much the same, boys wear blue and girl were pink.

There is no escaping this and as a result Slut shaming will always be prevalent in society.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Why no more than 4? Just curious.

I imagine most true swingers have more than 4 verifications. "

I imagine most people beyond their early twenties have had sex with more than four people, verified on a sex site or not. It’s an fascinatingly unrealistic criteria for a swinging site.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Why no more than 4? Just curious.

I imagine most true swingers have more than 4 verifications.

I imagine most people beyond their early twenties have had sex with more than four people, verified on a sex site or not. It’s an fascinatingly unrealistic criteria for a swinging site."

People are so judgemental

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We’d guess we are slut shamed by judgemental people who don’t know us, who cares, don’t want to meet those types of people anyway. Slut shaming is aimed at females, couples and single men on here, many a profile even slut shames people in the text “quality over quantity” “if you’ve loads of veris you are not our type” etc etc

If someone slut shames it means they have an inferiority complex

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thank you people for your responses. Educating read, very enlightening.

Much appreciated as a newbie, who recently had someone who doesn’t know me imply I was making poor choices.

Safe, sane, consensual, legal, over 21 so kickers to it !

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"Thank you people for your responses. Educating read, very enlightening.

Much appreciated as a newbie, who recently had someone who doesn’t know me imply I was making poor choices.

Safe, sane, consensual, legal, over 21 so kickers to it ! "

You do you, I have loads of verifications and if people think it makes me a slut, so be it, I'll wear that crown with pride!

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By *adMerWoman  over a year ago

Sandwich

Absolutely let’s just reclaim the word.

I am a slut and proud to be one.

I am a very choosy slut because I can be

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Absolutely let’s just reclaim the word.

I am a slut and proud to be one.

I am a very choosy slut because I can be "

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire

Hate the word slut

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thank you people for your responses. Educating read, very enlightening.

Much appreciated as a newbie, who recently had someone who doesn’t know me imply I was making poor choices.

Safe, sane, consensual, legal, over 21 so kickers to it ! "

It's funny when people who don't know you make assumptions. Whether you're meeting 1 person or 1,000 people a year, as long as you're happy that's all that matters.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I agree Mavis . We are all swingers here so why should anyone be judged . If it feels good and no one is getting hurt go for it .

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Coventry

I don't think you can win as different people are looking for different things. I've been told I have too many previously (even though they were very kind about me) and don't think I have all that many, but I've also been told I don't have any recent enough. You have to accept you can't be all things to everyone. Personally I'd like to be judged on the content rather than the quantity.

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..

People have their own selection process and if they are put off by numbers then they’re right to step away. The problem can be that people feel a need to voice their opinions on others behaviour. It’s ok to keep some thoughts inside.

I can’t say I notice much shaming in that regard on here though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't think you can win as different people are looking for different things. I've been told I have too many previously (even though they were very kind about me) and don't think I have all that many, but I've also been told I don't have any recent enough. You have to accept you can't be all things to everyone. Personally I'd like to be judged on the content rather than the quantity. "

What difference would it make if they didn't like the content of your veris rather than the quantity?

You have too many showing for me, but that just means we're not compatible.

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Coventry


"I don't think you can win as different people are looking for different things. I've been told I have too many previously (even though they were very kind about me) and don't think I have all that many, but I've also been told I don't have any recent enough. You have to accept you can't be all things to everyone. Personally I'd like to be judged on the content rather than the quantity.

What difference would it make if they didn't like the content of your veris rather than the quantity?

You have too many showing for me, but that just means we're not compatible. "

Yes, agreed, based in your personal way of viewing things, which makes my point I think. Some will judge by photos, some by what others say from personal in the flesh meeting and others by numbers one way or the other. All that really matters is to be who you are and accept with grace that it won't be what everyone finds attractive for whatever reason.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Absolutely let’s just reclaim the word.

I am a slut and proud to be one.

I am a very choosy slut because I can be "

Love the word slut ,,, definitely reclaim the word but not the negative judgement thrown with it.

Also a very choosy slut x

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman  over a year ago

Victoria, London

Big time

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't think you can win as different people are looking for different things. I've been told I have too many previously (even though they were very kind about me) and don't think I have all that many, but I've also been told I don't have any recent enough. You have to accept you can't be all things to everyone. Personally I'd like to be judged on the content rather than the quantity.

What difference would it make if they didn't like the content of your veris rather than the quantity?

You have too many showing for me, but that just means we're not compatible.

Yes, agreed, based in your personal way of viewing things, which makes my point I think. Some will judge by photos, some by what others say from personal in the flesh meeting and others by numbers one way or the other. All that really matters is to be who you are and accept with grace that it won't be what everyone finds attractive for whatever reason. "

I agree. I think people get too annoyed when they are excluded.

I don't care how many veris people have, I just don't want to meet them if they have them showing. I prefer private people.

People have their own reasons for not wanting to meet, and they should be respected.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Absolutely let’s just reclaim the word.

I am a slut and proud to be one.

I am a very choosy slut because I can be

Love the word slut ,,, definitely reclaim the word but not the negative judgement thrown with it.

Also a very choosy slut x "

Choosy how?

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Coventry


"I don't think you can win as different people are looking for different things. I've been told I have too many previously (even though they were very kind about me) and don't think I have all that many, but I've also been told I don't have any recent enough. You have to accept you can't be all things to everyone. Personally I'd like to be judged on the content rather than the quantity.

What difference would it make if they didn't like the content of your veris rather than the quantity?

You have too many showing for me, but that just means we're not compatible.

Yes, agreed, based in your personal way of viewing things, which makes my point I think. Some will judge by photos, some by what others say from personal in the flesh meeting and others by numbers one way or the other. All that really matters is to be who you are and accept with grace that it won't be what everyone finds attractive for whatever reason.

I agree. I think people get too annoyed when they are excluded.

I don't care how many veris people have, I just don't want to meet them if they have them showing. I prefer private people.

People have their own reasons for not wanting to meet, and they should be respected.

"

Totally. I've always figured that for me it shows people that I'm genuine and caring about the feelings of those I meet, as well as their needs. Some might say that hiding veris. suggests something to hide. If we can't respect that others see things differently this probably isn't the place to be. I've never really understood those who take the rejection of people they've never met so badly. It's a gut instinct - you either like what you see or you don't. It can't be personal if it's from a complete stranger.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/10/19 20:37:46]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Absolutely let’s just reclaim the word.

I am a slut and proud to be one.

I am a very choosy slut because I can be

Love the word slut ,,, definitely reclaim the word but not the negative judgement thrown with it.

Also a very choosy slut x

Personality. Integrity. Warmth. Safe play. Respect. Intelligence. Humour. Compassion.

Physical attraction plays a small part to be honest x

Choosy how?"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

That’s how I’m choosy

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Coventry


"That’s how I’m choosy "

Bravo you! We all have to be who we are and not try to please everyone. Nice feeling when we do mind!

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By *teve and mandyCouple  over a year ago

purley

I love being a dirty slut for all to fuck,love men knowing that.

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By *adMerWoman  over a year ago

Sandwich


"I love being a dirty slut for all to fuck,love men knowing that. "

Which really shows there’s a diversity even among us sluts because I would hate that feeling. Wouldn’t it be boring if we were all the same though?!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm a slut

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Would a manwhore count

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By *heIcebreakersCouple  over a year ago

Cramlington

Ah the slut shaming debate.

Myself and Ms Icebreaker were having this conversation the other day, but from a different angle. In some social circles our experience is that a woman who puts it about a bit is liberated, and entitled to do what she likes, but a man who does the same is a twat, especially if he's straight. (For some reason, when I tell people I'm queer they seem to factor in sluttiness as if the two are synonyms - they're not, but that's how they react...)

However, this isn't everyone's experience, and it may say something about our socal circles.

SO I think there's something going on in this debate about gender and sex roles, as well as about the amount of sex people have or how they choose partners. Even though I've frequently said on here that I'm a slut, I haven't had any abuse, but women report that experience too often for there not to be a reasonable hypothesis that there's acommon feeling, amongst misogynistic men, that they've the right to judge, to abuse and to denigrate those whose choices they disapprove of.

I've been a slut for much of my adult life - with my criteria for selecting partners being much more about do I feel desire, will I enjoy it and have we got the time than anything more complicated. However, my experience is that tell people you're a male slut and they assume you're a bottom, which I emphaticaly am not, which is the point about sex roles. I suspect bottoms are judged very much differently to tops or those who don't describe their oprientaton, irrespective of gender.

Add in that some men seem to assume that the number of partners they can get says something about their virility or their prowess, and you've got a very untidy mess of ideas, definitions and understandings of sluttiness, and the outcome is something like this thread. Many men who believe they are prolific shaggers will deny emphatically that they are sluts, even if that's the word they would use to describe a woman with the same number of partners or experiences.

Then of course there's the perennial and usually horribly ill-informed Fab debate about risk and sex in terms of public health, which lurks in a kind of curtain twitching way behind so many of these threads, complete with the hugely unsafe assumption on some people's part that they;re 'safer' if the people they have sex with have had a lower number of partners.

The icing on the cake are the people who treat Fab as a dating agency, which is their choice, (although maybe not the most successful choice given how many such sites exist).

Put it all together, add in a pinch of everyone's right on the internet to take offence, and you have a thread like this. Happy days...

Mr Icebreaker

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By *uckslut and MCouple  over a year ago

Poole


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason. "

I've had 2 long term parters, I'm currently on my 3rd (forever one). I'm a swinger so I've uses up my 4 chances. Please feel free to block us. We're obversly not compatible with you. We prefer exsprianced players who can tease and simulate the mind as well as the body duing sex.

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By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff

We meet people at Clubs, we don’t even consider how many partners either sex has had, it comes down to do we fancy them? I’m sure I’ve seen this topic before, but does the number of partners really matter? We’ve both been having sex for over 30 years, pretty regularly, so maybe 3 times a week, this means we’ve shagged each other (& others) over 4,500 times - must make us complete sluts

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That’s how I’m choosy "

Do you think that people who meet based purely on physical attraction are sluts?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

All sorts of shaming goes on on fab. There's a tacit understanding of what's acceptable and "normal" for swingers and if you're outside of that you're quietly and oh so nicely, negatively judged and shamed. This leads to a sort of central core of people who claim to all want a very similar experience, some of who you can tell are genuine in what they say and others not so much.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"That’s how I’m choosy

Do you think that people who meet based purely on physical attraction are sluts? "

astute observation

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By *tickler2000Man  over a year ago

St Agnes

Is it me, or is a swingers website the last place you should be call the ladies sluts?

Which is something I would never do.

I'm not qualified to judge anyone.

All I see is ladies enjoying themselves with like minded people.

As for showing veris.

Not showing raises the the questions. Are they genuine, are they going to waste my time, or batshit crazy.

And if you show them you are then judged in ways that have already been covered in posts above.

Bit of a rock and a hard place.

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By *ibblingnewtWoman  over a year ago

by the sea

Old fashioned values are deeply ingrained, I’m not sure about slut shaming but quite a few people hide the amount of people they meet, both male and female So I’m guessing that’s because they are ashamed for others to know exactly what they have been up to

I couldn’t want a man that was meeting numerous women anyway

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I find it interesting that there's a noticable hierarchy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think shaming happens across all genders, but women probably get it more.

I had a message on here from a much older man who told me I shouldn’t be such a whore at my young age because nobody will want to marry me. It did make me laugh!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it interesting that there's a noticable hierarchy. "

I'm never sure who is at the top.

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By *acey_RedWoman  over a year ago

Liverpool


"I think shaming happens across all genders, but women probably get it more.

I had a message on here from a much older man who told me I shouldn’t be such a whore at my young age because nobody will want to marry me. It did make me laugh! "

Lol! They say that like we all want to get married in the first place

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I find it interesting that there's a noticable hierarchy.

I'm never sure who is at the top. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason. "

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place "

Why?

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By *teveanddebsCouple  over a year ago

Norwich

Bigger I read that as "Slut Sharing"

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By *ollycouple71Couple  over a year ago

manchester


"

Why no more than 4? Just curious.

I imagine most true swingers have more than 4 verifications. "

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman  over a year ago

London


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place "

It is not a place. It is an open Internet resource.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"From a tgurl perspective I get called a slut merely because I enjoy giving men sexual pleasures,it doesn't really bother me but I do get tired of hearing it from men on here "

I get this too, it's very common.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place

Why?"

Because this a place where the whole aim is to interact with the community in order to make friends and have sexual relations with said friends. Swinging is actually the opposite of monogamy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I had one guy who I was exchanging messages with, showed a lot of interest, looked like a meet might be on the cards, then he abruptly came out with "no, you've seen too much cock action to be safe".

Charm school obviously worked its magic on that one, eh?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place

It is not a place. It is an open Internet resource."

An open or closed internet source is a place..... Its a place on the internet.

a particular position, point, or area in space; a location.

Is the definition of a place. This site is located at the web address. By definition a place is not limited to geographical use.

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By *arnsley guy100Man  over a year ago

Sheffield

[Removed by poster at 16/10/19 22:50:02]

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By *arnsley guy100Man  over a year ago

Sheffield

I couldn't give a toss realy... Do what you want for me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I couldn't give a toss realy... Do what you want for me"

I think youre clearly the winner here!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ya can’t really go by verifications because a lot of people don’t bother with all that jazz! So you’re not goi g to know the truth anyway! People may have 10 on their profile but might have been on before with 50!

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By *lex46TV/TS  over a year ago

Near Wells

Well I don't mind being called a slut because I know I am one. I love it when the person I'm having sex with calls me a slut.

I don't have sex with just anyone but I love sex, all kinds of sex and I want more verifications.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"That's rich saying no more than 4 when you are hiding your profile or thinks she's precious lol "

Bit two faced with your comment I think. You're standing on one side of this debate and slipping snide remarks about another. Isn't this what those with loads of veris have been complaining about and you go and do it for someone who doesn't.

Sounds like those on both sides are as bad as each other with putting others down due to their veris.

I'd have expected those with copious veris would have been more, not less understanding.

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By *lbinoGorillaMan  over a year ago

Redditch


"Bugger, I read that as "Slut Sharing" "

I'd be up for that....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/10/19 10:13:53]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place

Why?

Because this a place where the whole aim is to interact with the community in order to make friends and have sexual relations with said friends. Swinging is actually the opposite of monogamy. "

Each to their own! People come on fab for various reasons so your aim is most definitely not everyone else's. Not everyone wants to fuck their way through the site and shouldn't be told they're in the wrong place just because they don't want to do that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think shaming happens across all genders, but women probably get it more.

I had a message on here from a much older man who told me I shouldn’t be such a whore at my young age because nobody will want to marry me. It did make me laugh! "

I am waaaay older than you and have received similar. ‘You don’t want to be on here too long or no one normal will want you.’ The double standard is alive and thriving in fabland.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman  over a year ago

Victoria, London

oooh yes

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By *TJxComboMan  over a year ago

birmingham


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true"

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple "

And that makes it acceptable?

There are men who equally don’t have to put in any effort to have sex, and yet they still don’t get slut shamed.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think shaming happens across all genders, but women probably get it more.

I had a message on here from a much older man who told me I shouldn’t be such a whore at my young age because nobody will want to marry me. It did make me laugh!

I am waaaay older than you and have received similar. ‘You don’t want to be on here too long or no one normal will want you.’ The double standard is alive and thriving in fabland."

Ugh, how rude!

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By *oliathMan  over a year ago

Ulverston

I receive horrendously insulting messages all the time....because I’ve “met far too many people”

Supposedly you shouldn’t actually meet people on here.....just chat online!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I won't meet people with more than 4 sex veris on their profile.

Some people seem to think that's slut shaming. That's their problem, not mine.

I think both men and women get judged the same way. Men may be more open and say they wouldn't meet someone woth lots of veris. Women would say no thanks but not give the reason.

Even i have more than 4 veris

Something tells me you're in the wrong place

Why?

Because this a place where the whole aim is to interact with the community in order to make friends and have sexual relations with said friends. Swinging is actually the opposite of monogamy.

Each to their own! People come on fab for various reasons so your aim is most definitely not everyone else's. Not everyone wants to fuck their way through the site and shouldn't be told they're in the wrong place just because they don't want to do that.

"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I receive horrendously insulting messages all the time....because I’ve “met far too many people”

Supposedly you shouldn’t actually meet people on here.....just chat online!"

See it as a positive. They've shown how nasty they are and you don't need to waste time meeting them.

I wouldn't give the real reason why I wouldn't meet them, I don't see any need. Always be polite.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple "

Trust me it takes an awful lot of skill. Contrary to popular opinion it takes discernment, taste and maturity to seek out skilled lovers who truly understand a woman's sexuality. Only men who understand that are truly confident with a promiscuous woman and not threatened by her.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple "

Not understanding. It takes no skill for either sex to have plentiful shit shags. Slut shaming is more to do with men needing to know who the father of their partners child is, at a basic almost subconscious level.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

Trust me it takes an awful lot of skill. Contrary to popular opinion it takes discernment, taste and maturity to seek out skilled lovers who truly understand a woman's sexuality. Only men who understand that are truly confident with a promiscuous woman and not threatened by her."

Well said. I’m surprised (and saddened) how many men on here have been intimidated by plentiful veris and female sexual confidence. They seem to think that they have to compete with all the previous meets, which is absolutely not the case.

My memory isn’t that good, lol.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

Trust me it takes an awful lot of skill. Contrary to popular opinion it takes discernment, taste and maturity to seek out skilled lovers who truly understand a woman's sexuality. Only men who understand that are truly confident with a promiscuous woman and not threatened by her.

Well said. I’m surprised (and saddened) how many men on here have been intimidated by plentiful veris and female sexual confidence. They seem to think that they have to compete with all the previous meets, which is absolutely not the case.

My memory isn’t that good, lol."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Is there an opposite of slut shaming, where you want to meet people who others would consider a slut? Cos I think that would be me.. I love knowing I'm playing with people who are extremely sexually liberated.

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By *ing_Wookie_RodeoMan  over a year ago

stockport wasteland

I just yay people are talking about me I'm popular lol

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By *ing_Wookie_RodeoMan  over a year ago

stockport wasteland


"I receive horrendously insulting messages all the time....because I’ve “met far too many people”

Supposedly you shouldn’t actually meet people on here.....just chat online!"

Goliath don't that make you an Internet slut

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By *ing_Wookie_RodeoMan  over a year ago

stockport wasteland

People calling others sluts is funny mainly because these so called sluts can hold a convo and are friendly people hence getting a shagging, the people calling the name lack the social skills to get a shag whenever they want. I get called a slut by my mum and I know she got no sex life lol in fact when I go away for a weekend she calls them my dirty dick weekends ( even though she knows I use protection) I'd call myself a slut but I've not had asmany partners as Alot on here and lost my virginity at 19, so I just say I'm making up for lost time lol people in school call each other sluts just for kissing 1 person. So I ask what's bad about being a slut

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We view slut as a good thing. The gobby rude ones who their mates fellas behind their back are slags. Big difference. Slut = lady stud. Slag = human dick fuelled car crash. Male equivalent would just be a c*nt or Ryan Giggs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Great reply x that's exactly how i see it too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was slut shamed, made me feel like shit but hey ho men can do what they want and be patted on the back for if.

Those little studs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was shamed as well just rode it out and told the guys mates he had a small dick couldnt get hard

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nothing wrong with being a slut. I've seen many women call themselves sluts on here. I personally find it a turn on

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I was shamed as well just rode it out and told the guys mates he had a small dick couldnt get hard "

What happened? How did you know his mates? How did he call you a slut?

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By *ir-spunk-alotMan  over a year ago

Southern England

[Removed by poster at 18/10/19 07:12:20]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

And that makes it acceptable?

There are men who equally don’t have to put in any effort to have sex, and yet they still don’t get slut shamed. "

Actually in my friends group im the slut and im shamed for it quite often but in a man slut so swings and round abouts

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

And to the opposite i would rather meet someone with plenty of gpod veris, theyre more likely to be good in bed because lets face it who wants someone with a princess complex who just starfishes in bed?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

Trust me it takes an awful lot of skill. Contrary to popular opinion it takes discernment, taste and maturity to seek out skilled lovers who truly understand a woman's sexuality. Only men who understand that are truly confident with a promiscuous woman and not threatened by her."

Your conclusions are a tad unrelated. The first statement I completely agree with. The later total bs.

1. Because someone may choose not to meet with someone who's fucked the site doesn't in anyway imply he's threated by her. His choice may have no bearing whatsoever with her confidence in her self or lack of judgement in who she meets.

2. They can be confident with an overtly promiscuous women without wanting to meet them too

There reasons can be more about, availability, interested in meeting a person regularly, not feeling the need to battle to get a piece of their time, increase in health risks, reducing the chances of meeting someone who also isn't into bed post notching.

3. There's a lot of men who do not understand your first statement who will meet anyone who opens their legs to them. It's not about who or what the woman is for some of these guys, but rather they just need to get off and it can be with anyone.

It's not always about threatened as you too easily assume.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It still happens. And I find it out dated. So what if women have the same appetite for sex than most men? Sex is something to enjoy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Women will always be called sluts

Men will always be called studs

Sad but true

It takes zero skill for women to sleep around that's why your shamed it's really that simple

Trust me it takes an awful lot of skill. Contrary to popular opinion it takes discernment, taste and maturity to seek out skilled lovers who truly understand a woman's sexuality. Only men who understand that are truly confident with a promiscuous woman and not threatened by her.

Your conclusions are a tad unrelated. The first statement I completely agree with. The later total bs.

1. Because someone may choose not to meet with someone who's fucked the site doesn't in anyway imply he's threated by her. His choice may have no bearing whatsoever with her confidence in her self or lack of judgement in who she meets.

2. They can be confident with an overtly promiscuous women without wanting to meet them too

There reasons can be more about, availability, interested in meeting a person regularly, not feeling the need to battle to get a piece of their time, increase in health risks, reducing the chances of meeting someone who also isn't into bed post notching.

3. There's a lot of men who do not understand your first statement who will meet anyone who opens their legs to them. It's not about who or what the woman is for some of these guys, but rather they just need to get off and it can be with anyone.

It's not always about threatened as you too easily assume."

You’re right it’s not always about being threatened.

But a lot of the time it actually is.

Not all verifications on someone’s profile are shown, and verifications likely aren’t given for every meet, so nobody is going to know for a fact how many people someone has met.

Someone with 10 verifications may well have met 10 people and someone with 1 verification may well have met 20 people but has asked not to be verified. Nobody would know for sure.

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By *pertureTV/TS  over a year ago

New Ferry, wirral in stockings and sussies

women seem to be womens biggest critics, men only tend to get bitchy if they get turned down.

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By *angorguyMan  over a year ago

bangor

I haven't seen actual shaming on here but some peoples profiles beggar belief!

On here 9 months and 80 verifications is a meet every 3 or 4 days! Do you need to post every verification? I dont! So some people are their own worst enemies.

But there does seem to be doible standards, a Woman posts 50 verifications its "whoa, not going there good knows what id catch!" a Guy Though and the theory is "oh he must be good!!"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I do not care if someone has a lot of partners and veris as long as they are chosey in who they have sex with and not doing all kinds of sleazy shit in bed, so many on here just clearly have sex with anything judging by the veris, puts me right off. Judgemental probably but being honest

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Slut - noun - a woman with the morals of a man

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I haven't seen actual shaming on here but some peoples profiles beggar belief!

On here 9 months and 80 verifications is a meet every 3 or 4 days! Do you need to post every verification? I dont! So some people are their own worst enemies.

But there does seem to be doible standards, a Woman posts 50 verifications its "whoa, not going there good knows what id catch!" a Guy Though and the theory is "oh he must be good!!" "

Many people in relationships have sex every 3 or 4 days. Or more often. They display the veris to attract similar people. And to put off incompatible people.

It only takes one fuck to catch something.

People who fuck more tend to be more aware of testing. They may be more safe that the types who fuck less often but never get tested.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster


"And to the opposite i would rather meet someone with plenty of gpod veris, theyre more likely to be good in bed because lets face it who wants someone with a princess complex who just starfishes in bed? "
what is a princess complex ?

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By *ing_Wookie_RodeoMan  over a year ago

stockport wasteland

Call me a slut, I'll look at you with a blank face walk off and sleep with someone else that is interested that makes me laugh and smile

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By *rShinyKnickersMan  over a year ago

BARRY

Call me a slut and I'll love it..haha!

Seriously though, it doesn't bother me how many people partners have slept with, so long as they've done it safely.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster

I quite like being called a slut etc but only when it's appropriate and in context

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"And to the opposite i would rather meet someone with plenty of gpod veris, theyre more likely to be good in bed because lets face it who wants someone with a princess complex who just starfishes in bed? what is a princess complex ?"

A girl who feels that they don't have to do anything in the bedroom and just takes it, as if the other person is lucky to just be there so has to do all the work

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster


"And to the opposite i would rather meet someone with plenty of gpod veris, theyre more likely to be good in bed because lets face it who wants someone with a princess complex who just starfishes in bed? what is a princess complex ?

A girl who feels that they don't have to do anything in the bedroom and just takes it, as if the other person is lucky to just be there so has to do all the work"

is there lots of princesses on this site then ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I quite like being called a slut etc but only when it's appropriate and in context "

No issues with that at all, often adds a bit dimension to play. Also a term of affection lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Call me a slut, I'll look at you with a blank face walk off and sleep with someone else that is interested that makes me laugh and smile"

Would you have a tear in your eyes as you were walking away?

If anyone dared call me a slut I would thrown them on the bed and give them the ploughing if their life

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By *ing_Wookie_RodeoMan  over a year ago

stockport wasteland


"Call me a slut, I'll look at you with a blank face walk off and sleep with someone else that is interested that makes me laugh and smile

Would you have a tear in your eyes as you were walking away?

If anyone dared call me a slut I would thrown them on the bed and give them the ploughing if their life"

Exactly my friend

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My profile name and verifications are self explanatory. I was due to meet a guy, for vanilla sex, which I love. Then he basically called me a slut and cancelled, after I posted an extreme fantasy that I had posted on my status. This hurt, as I use this site for fun and I don’t hide it. A few days after he ‘changed his mind’, and wanted to meet. This pissed me off more, as yes I’m a dirty slut in the bedroom but I have feelings, plus it’s mutual, I’m no ones ‘toy’.

I think some men are also ‘dreamers’, the initial chatting stage is great, then once they see my ‘friends only’ pics (which some are extreme) they can become a little weird and disappear.

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By *hMyGawdCouple  over a year ago

Midlands

Feminist tripe.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It happens sadly only neanderthal numskulls would deny it but then there a lot of that type about.

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By *lick9Man  over a year ago

Stockport

I find it a bigger turn on when I know a woman has fucked loads of guys. I know she has had a lot of practice and variation so she will be a far better meet and in turn I will learn something new which makes me a better fuck

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By *sm265Woman  over a year ago

Shangri-la

I think shaming of any kind is usually rooted in either the insecurities or jealousy of the person doing the shaming. They compensate for what is lacking in themselves by attempting to make others look or feel bad.

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By *arkSuedeMan  over a year ago

London

Sex is great. Have lots of it.

Who on Earth pays attention to people “shaming” something that feels great?

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By *moothdickMan  over a year ago

stoke

Doesn’t effect my way fthinking, it’s a swingers site and it’s mainly about sex... so why judge

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By *ants cockWoman  over a year ago

lincoln

I’ve always been called a slut by guys. Even as a virgin, hadn’t even kissed a guy. They make up all kinds of rumours too. It’s not just the vanilla world it’s happened here. I don’t like the word. It’s worse than cunt to me. If that word is in your profile or message. It’s a no from me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think there’s a degree of jealousy in slut shaming. Especially if the person has been turned down.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No one should be judged for what they enjoy or do I just think thats there personal business People that judge might want to think about. And maybe try it

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By *aughtywifeandhimCouple  over a year ago

bedford

Don't think anyone should be judged like this, life is for the living, your a long time dead, so sod it enjoy life to the full, I would play everyday if I could. Wife has had more play than me and would let her have even more if she wanted

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