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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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...and being sexually liberated the same thing?
Does sharing sex with people you find attractive in a group situation make you a swinger or just open minded enough to have uncomplicated sex? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You know what?
I don't even really like the label: Swinger.
For some reason it feels really dated to me, and of course this is just a personal opinion.
I much prefer to think of sexual activities with multiple partners as "recreational", or "situational" sex.
Of course, "open minded" has to be a big part of it, but that would be a pre-requisit wouldn't it?
What it really is, is:
All Good Fun |
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"...and being sexually liberated the same thing?
Does sharing sex with people you find attractive in a group situation make you a swinger or just open minded enough to have uncomplicated sex?"
to the first question, no, ppl can be totally monogomous and have sexually liberated attitudes. My bdsm friends are not swingers but have no problem with ppl fucking in one room while they chat or cover me in wax in the living room(that was one hell of a party  )
As for the second question, sharing sex in a group situation seems a good basic definition of a swinger.
Ppl ssem eager to say swinger is whta you want it to mean, but then it looses any value as an identifier. Many of us will have met the single men in clubs who wouldnt/wont let their partner swing because they consider swinging women to be free protisutes and look down on them.
The ability to distinguish those who share attitudes and outlook is important, as it is not always shown by sexual activity.
Kev and Sir are both good examples of this, they "swing" as in meet ppl for sex far less than me,but in attitude have no hang ups about monogomy. What they do matters not a bit, what they believe and value does. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
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"I'm the same; I don't care what you label me as! I'm just here to have lots and lots of fun 
Same here never see a point in trying to label people."
i think AD is more concerned with self identifiers...if i say i am a swinger i am not labeling anyone else, i am suggesting things about my behaviour, the problem is the beliefs and values that underpin that behaviour. It used to be easier to assume shared values.
Now it only ever was an assumption, but it helped. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
"
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me. |
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me."
yet u describe yourself as straight on your profile...presumably so others can identify your sexuality.
i'm not having a go...just pointing out terms have meanings that aid understanding if we share an understanding of what the term implies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me.
yet u describe yourself as straight on your profile...presumably so others can identify your sexuality.
i'm not having a go...just pointing out terms have meanings that aid understanding if we share an understanding of what the term implies."
No you are trying to push labelling on me and i dont do it. Really dont see the point at all of chucking all the people of one type in a big group. I like to see everyone as and individual and dont see anything wrong with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a Jedi Knight according to my last few census's....
I do try to feel the force, but it has not helped us find our pigeon hole....
We like only Gangbangs, what does that makes us? Different but the same...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me.
yet u describe yourself as straight on your profile...presumably so others can identify your sexuality.
i'm not having a go...just pointing out terms have meanings that aid understanding if we share an understanding of what the term implies."
The labels are only the options that we can tick in the boxes available on the site when creating a profile.
The description we put on our profiles are of our own choosing |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm the same; I don't care what you label me as! I'm just here to have lots and lots of fun
Same here never see a point in trying to label people.
i think AD is more concerned with self identifiers...if i say i am a swinger i am not labeling anyone else, i am suggesting things about my behaviour, the problem is the beliefs and values that underpin that behaviour. It used to be easier to assume shared values.
Now it only ever was an assumption, but it helped."
It's not a concern, just wondering how others see things.
To each their own.
I'm not out to psychoanalyse anyones answers or second guess them, It's just a thought I had and was interested in other peoples opinions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and being sexually liberated the same thing?
Does sharing sex with people you find attractive in a group situation make you a swinger or just open minded enough to have uncomplicated sex?"
i dont class myself as a swinger to be honest, i think mainly because i dont like the word or what it stands for by many people on here
I get fed up of the couples who say you cant be single and swing then spend all their time looking for single women
I get fed up with the self richeous 'swingers' who think they have it sussed and low and behold anyone who does not 'swing' their way
i would rather see myself as someone who enjoys good sex and happy to go for what i want
These sites are just handy for finding what your looking for, i love 3sums with bi men but how would you say to a guy in a bar...are you bi and can your mate just us for a 3sum? lol for me its just easier to use swinging sites to find things that may be awkward to ask for outside of swinging site |
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There are so many variations to the word swinger, just reading the forums you can see different people see it different ways.
It is what you want it to be. For me, its simply a word to say that i have a variety of sex with other people as well as my partner. If i was single id still use the term, because id still want the same if i had a partner |
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me.
yet u describe yourself as straight on your profile...presumably so others can identify your sexuality.
i'm not having a go...just pointing out terms have meanings that aid understanding if we share an understanding of what the term implies
.
No you are trying to push labelling on me and i dont do it. Really dont see the point at all of chucking all the people of one type in a big group. I like to see everyone as and individual and dont see anything wrong with that."
i am not trying to push anything on you ,just trying to explain why knowledge of common ground matters to some.You dont consider yourself a swinger ,fine, but then i have no way of knowing if you look down on the women and couples on here or not.
i do find it very significant that this thread is mainly posted on by singles saying swinging doesnt matter to them as a term, which i think is part of what AD was highlighting. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some good points so far.
I/we don't like to pigeon hole things, people or situations but sometimes it can be hard to describe certain ways and things people do.
Maybe but i see people as all individuals labels just put me off but thats me.
yet u describe yourself as straight on your profile...presumably so others can identify your sexuality.
i'm not having a go...just pointing out terms have meanings that aid understanding if we share an understanding of what the term implies
.
No you are trying to push labelling on me and i dont do it. Really dont see the point at all of chucking all the people of one type in a big group. I like to see everyone as and individual and dont see anything wrong with that.
i am not trying to push anything on you ,just trying to explain why knowledge of common ground matters to some.You dont consider yourself a swinger ,fine, but then i have no way of knowing if you look down on the women and couples on here or not.
i do find it very significant that this thread is mainly posted on by singles saying swinging doesnt matter to them as a term, which i think is part of what AD was highlighting."
I think you may be reading too much into this post JPF and some of the answers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and being sexually liberated the same thing?
Does sharing sex with people you find attractive in a group situation make you a swinger or just open minded enough to have uncomplicated sex?
i dont class myself as a swinger to be honest, i think mainly because i dont like the word or what it stands for by many people on here
I get fed up of the couples who say you cant be single and swing then spend all their time looking for single women
I get fed up with the self richeous 'swingers' who think they have it sussed and low and behold anyone who does not 'swing' their way
i would rather see myself as someone who enjoys good sex and happy to go for what i want
These sites are just handy for finding what your looking for, i love 3sums with bi men but how would you say to a guy in a bar...are you bi and can your mate just us for a 3sum? lol for me its just easier to use swinging sites to find things that may be awkward to ask for outside of swinging site"
 |
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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago
south staffs |
May I propose a new "label" ?
I / We would like to think of ourselves as "Sexual Adventurers", a phrase coined by a close friend.
This "label" seems to us to fit every eventuality and does not set any limits nor indeed any expectations. It leaves room for any and every kink, interest, persuasion and fetish - if you have any of those - and allows a person to be an individual whatever they like.
Just a suggestion.
Jane x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think long before sexuality / sexual labels and social stigmas were invented, people fucked when and who they wanted for pleasure.
Roman Orgies are a good example.
I personally don't like the word bisexual, as it implies I can't make my mind up... Actually I'm trisexual as I'll try most things once!!
Forget the labels, enjoy the pleasures of the flesh and get stuck in, on or under whoever you want to! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"May I propose a new "label" ?
I / We would like to think of ourselves as "Sexual Adventurers", a phrase coined by a close friend.
This "label" seems to us to fit every eventuality and does not set any limits nor indeed any expectations. It leaves room for any and every kink, interest, persuasion and fetish - if you have any of those - and allows a person to be an individual whatever they like.
Just a suggestion.
Jane x"
We have used this for many years.. or sexual explorers... We even used to have that in our couples profile...
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The intention of this thread was to get peoples thoughts on swinging/sexual liberation, not labels and sexuality.
Your failed in your intention  "
A failing of mine? Or a misunderstanding by others?
Some on here got it others didn't, same old same old!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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open minded enough to have uncomplicated sex, but with a do's and don'ts list...
You are right, I am guilty of not reading your post correctly, then getting distracted by other posts...   |
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