FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is it a massive t run off?
Is it a massive t run off?
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So I've just had a reply from someone I introduced my self too. It basicly said she understood I was part of a couple but the paragraph about my partner was a huge turn off and she blocked me. Which is fair enough, each to their own.
Not that it changes anything for me, I'm hugely proud of partner and our relationship. For how we are and how I feel about her is key to knowing a bit about and understanding me. Just curious to how many others are put off about what I say on my profile about my partner?
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"Everyone has the right of choice on here, I really don't see the issue."
Neither do I, there is no 'issue'. As I stated each to their own. Maybe the intent of the question does not come across clear enough (although I thought it did). It's not a question about freedom of choice or an 'issuse'. I'm simply inquisitive to see what others think to this aspect of my profile? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone has the right of choice on here, I really don't see the issue.
Neither do I, there is no 'issue'. As I stated each to their own. Maybe the intent of the question does not come across clear enough (although I thought it did). It's not a question about freedom of choice or an 'issuse'. I'm simply inquisitive to see what others think to this aspect of my profile?"
Looks like an issue to me otherwise you wouldn't have posted about it. |
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"Everyone has the right of choice on here, I really don't see the issue.
Neither do I, there is no 'issue'. As I stated each to their own. Maybe the intent of the question does not come across clear enough (although I thought it did). It's not a question about freedom of choice or an 'issuse'. I'm simply inquisitive to see what others think to this aspect of my profile?
Looks like an issue to me otherwise you wouldn't have posted about it."
It's really no different from any other musing on here. There is no issuse, like I said doesn't change anything. Just a mixture of time on my hands and general curiosity. A talking point if you will. I may be wrong but I get the feeling that I may have somehow unwittingly triggered a bee in someone's bonnet. But that's standard on the internet these days. |
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By *c1989Woman
over a year ago
Manchester |
I do love a nice long profile. It gives a great insight into the mind of the writer.
As for that paragraph. Nothing wrong there. It shows how you feel and makes me want to seek an introduction. Haha
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Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect. |
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"For me it’s you just being very upfront and honest about how you feel about your partner and how she makes you feel.
"
Thank you. That's the way I see it. In line with the rest of my profile I like to upfront and open. So it follows that a big part of it is about partner and how proud I am of her. I think it saves time and messing about if people can get a good feel for me in the first place. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect. "
I agree. It depends on who is reading I think.
Also, just read it again & this part in your profile “My Girl brings me all the fulfilment I could ever want.”
Could make some women you’re interested in or want to meet, think what is the point if you can already get all the fulfilment from your partner.
Thing is though, if you like your profile as it is, keep it that way, you’ll eventually find someone who likes it too. You can change your profile 10 times to suit 10 different women and it likely on guarantee a meet, so best to be yourself!  |
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect. "
I absolutely get that and I'm sure many other worry the same. But it's just important that people get a feel for what she means to me and proud I am of her. Its just inline with the level of deal in the rest of my profile. I just want people to get an accurate flavour of me, save time down the line. But fear not. |
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Well, personally. I think it's lovely
You come across as happy man, with a partner you think the world of.
You're both in this together, no hang ups, no secrets, just enjoying your lives & the adventures it brings
Don't change a damn thing.
If it puts people off meeting you, then they're not the sort of people you'd actually want to meet xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mrs Cagey here
I absolutely love the paragraph about your girl. I love that it’s clear you adore her and that your experiences don’t exclude her. I sometimes chat with guys 1-1 here and the ones who are in a relationship, if they put down their partners I don’t want to speak with them.( I don’t mean a moan, people have a moan)
Showing the depth of your adoration for her makes you a more whole person. Maybe it puts off people who are looking to date? Anyone I talk to knows I adore G and vice versa. It’s part of all we do because we are each other’s partners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not going to comment on your profile, as I dont think you've asked for feedback.
Its natural man.. she's your partner for a reason. Someone has knocked that and now you feel protective.
Your profile, your rules. |
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect.
I agree. It depends on who is reading I think.
Also, just read it again & this part in your profile “My Girl brings me all the fulfilment I could ever want.”
Could make some women you’re interested in or want to meet, think what is the point if you can already get all the fulfilment from your partner.
Thing is though, if you like your profile as it is, keep it that way, you’ll eventually find someone who likes it too. You can change your profile 10 times to suit 10 different women and it likely on guarantee a meet, so best to be yourself! "
An intresting analysis, thank you. I've never looked to disguise myself or change things to look a more viable option to others. I am who I am and in my profile I've always aimed to true reflection of me. I fully get peoples misgivings about that aspect of my profile, but I can be only me. Anyone who is not ok with me as I am is not for me. Which is perfectly fine in the same way others may not be for me too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect. "
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect.
I absolutely get that and I'm sure many other worry the same. But it's just important that people get a feel for what she means to me and proud I am of her. Its just inline with the level of deal in the rest of my profile. I just want people to get an accurate flavour of me, save time down the line. But fear not."
I'm sure your intentions are entirely positive but it's like when I see couples who plaster Facebook with how much they adore each other, it makes me question what they're trying to prove. I tend to assume with anyone who is in a happy relationship that their partner means a lot to them and that they are proud of them. You can tell that from the way they naturally speak about them without them having to explicitly say it and if someone really makes a point of it, it can feel a bit forced.
I've met other couples in the past in open relationships who have felt a need to tell everyone that it doesn't mean anything is lacking in their relationship or something along those lines. The truth is the right people would never think this anyway and the wrong people won't believe it even if you say it until you're blue in the face. Personally I'd never meet someone who showed disrespect towards my partner or didn't respect the fact I was in a relationship. If I had to make a point of saying my partner meant a lot to me to have them respect it then I still wouldn't want to meet them. On the flipside of this I don't like anyone I meet to feel compared to him or that they are somehow competing with him as that is not how it is for me. Even in more casual arrangements, everyone I meet I value as an individual and they have their own unique qualities that attracted me to them.
Of course it's your profile and it's entirely up to you what you put on it. None of this is a criticism and I'm not saying you should change it either, as this post shows a lot of people like it. I'm just trying to show a different perspective to how it can be perceived and why you might have got the reaction you mention. |
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By *manaWoman
over a year ago
Basingstoke |
I like the honesty, a big plus for me but it is a lot about her on your single profile.
Wouldn't stop me talking to you but I personally wouldn't say so much.
Its lovely you are so strong together though  xx |
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect.
I absolutely get that and I'm sure many other worry the same. But it's just important that people get a feel for what she means to me and proud I am of her. Its just inline with the level of deal in the rest of my profile. I just want people to get an accurate flavour of me, save time down the line. But fear not.
I'm sure your intentions are entirely positive but it's like when I see couples who plaster Facebook with how much they adore each other, it makes me question what they're trying to prove. I tend to assume with anyone who is in a happy relationship that their partner means a lot to them and that they are proud of them. You can tell that from the way they naturally speak about them without them having to explicitly say it and if someone really makes a point of it, it can feel a bit forced.
I've met other couples in the past in open relationships who have felt a need to tell everyone that it doesn't mean anything is lacking in their relationship or something along those lines. The truth is the right people would never think this anyway and the wrong people won't believe it even if you say it until you're blue in the face. Personally I'd never meet someone who showed disrespect towards my partner or didn't respect the fact I was in a relationship. If I had to make a point of saying my partner meant a lot to me to have them respect it then I still wouldn't want to meet them. On the flipside of this I don't like anyone I meet to feel compared to him or that they are somehow competing with him as that is not how it is for me. Even in more casual arrangements, everyone I meet I value as an individual and they have their own unique qualities that attracted me to them.
Of course it's your profile and it's entirely up to you what you put on it. None of this is a criticism and I'm not saying you should change it either, as this post shows a lot of people like it. I'm just trying to show a different perspective to how it can be perceived and why you might have got the reaction you mention."
I totally get what your saying. For there's nothing forced in what I'm say, if anything it the opposite, a free flowing expression of how I feel. Whether I have nothing written on my profile or everthing I do have the nature of the realtionship and how we feel doesn't change. People who know me or talk to me know how I feel anyway. So in terms of need to put so much, granted there is no need, I get that. But I am immensely proud of partner and what we. Appoliges for any vomit caused. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not gonna lie, the intensity of it would make me worry you'd be banging on about your Mrs the whole time if we met haha! I absolutely adore my partner but I don't feel the need to basically tell anyone I'd meet that they would never compare to him or something to that effect.
I absolutely get that and I'm sure many other worry the same. But it's just important that people get a feel for what she means to me and proud I am of her. Its just inline with the level of deal in the rest of my profile. I just want people to get an accurate flavour of me, save time down the line. But fear not.
I'm sure your intentions are entirely positive but it's like when I see couples who plaster Facebook with how much they adore each other, it makes me question what they're trying to prove. I tend to assume with anyone who is in a happy relationship that their partner means a lot to them and that they are proud of them. You can tell that from the way they naturally speak about them without them having to explicitly say it and if someone really makes a point of it, it can feel a bit forced.
I've met other couples in the past in open relationships who have felt a need to tell everyone that it doesn't mean anything is lacking in their relationship or something along those lines. The truth is the right people would never think this anyway and the wrong people won't believe it even if you say it until you're blue in the face. Personally I'd never meet someone who showed disrespect towards my partner or didn't respect the fact I was in a relationship. If I had to make a point of saying my partner meant a lot to me to have them respect it then I still wouldn't want to meet them. On the flipside of this I don't like anyone I meet to feel compared to him or that they are somehow competing with him as that is not how it is for me. Even in more casual arrangements, everyone I meet I value as an individual and they have their own unique qualities that attracted me to them.
Of course it's your profile and it's entirely up to you what you put on it. None of this is a criticism and I'm not saying you should change it either, as this post shows a lot of people like it. I'm just trying to show a different perspective to how it can be perceived and why you might have got the reaction you mention.
I totally get what your saying. For there's nothing forced in what I'm say, if anything it the opposite, a free flowing expression of how I feel. Whether I have nothing written on my profile or everthing I do have the nature of the realtionship and how we feel doesn't change. People who know me or talk to me know how I feel anyway. So in terms of need to put so much, granted there is no need, I get that. But I am immensely proud of partner and what we. Appoliges for any vomit caused."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me and my partner adore each other but we feel we don’t need to put it on our profile and tell the people of fab , our relationship is ours we are looking for people to have fun with that is all they don’t need to know how in love we are .. we only meet as a couple because separate meets are just not for us but if we had single profiles I wouldn’t expect a paragraph about his love for me on his profile and vice versa . |
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Although I do wonder if could be condense things down and still get across the same flavour of me but in a more bite sized format. Maybe something to look in to in the future because if the text is so long that people switch off then I'm failing to communicate very well in the first place. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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I think Lacey Red has perfectly explained how I view it. Yes, it's absolutely lovely and wonderful to read such a declaration of love - it's quite rare on fab.
On the same hand, for me, when I meet someone 1 on 1 I am spending time with that particular person. I don't want them to feel like they won't measure up or I'd be comparing my partner to them.
A poster on here, Gemini Man, describes it as a bubble. Sometimes I think that analogy is a bit naff but I also think that it's true. I want someone to immerse themselves in me and I them, not be thinking about others constantly.
Also, I know far more about her than you. That's not good on a sm's profile. To me, anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I couldn't read it all, I'm sorry, I would just click away. It's lovely you are in love but people aren't invested in you enough to care about hearing the ins and outs of your feelings.
You have a lovely descriptive, almost poetic way with words and you are a good writer, but when I click on a profile I want a quick run down of who they are, a splash of their personality and then to read what their type is. Then I look forward to hearing more about them when we chat back and forth, because without good chat I won't want to meet. I'm sure you have great chat but save some for private messages maybe.
Just my opinion  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was called a racist and, more recently, a homophobe (can't work that one out!) from my profile. I wouldn't worry about what other people think, lovely.
You clearly love your Girl very much so it's all good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Me and my partner adore each other but we feel we don’t need to put it on our profile and tell the people of fab , our relationship is ours we are looking for people to have fun with that is all they don’t need to know how in love we are .. we only meet as a couple because separate meets are just not for us but if we had single profiles I wouldn’t expect a paragraph about his love for me on his profile and vice versa . "
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I think its à lovely read and very much helped by the fact you write well.
I'm just a big squishy softie and the fact that you declare how you feel about your good lady publicly appeals to me.
I wish you both all the very best x |
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I can’t see what the problem would be, other than she wants a single man maybe? 