FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Curve confidence
Curve confidence
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. |
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Never been an issue but it may help to go on a social for a few drinks to loosen up first, see if the sparks start to fly. Find someone who is patient and respectful too, if you explain your nervous and may not go through with it but they still meet for a drink that may also help calm your nerves in it's own way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. "
From what I can see of your pics you look amazing. X |
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By *uciyassMan
over a year ago
sheffield |
Firstly you look fabulous. Why not meet for a social first meet in a relaxed location and just chat no obligations from anyone and if you want to take it further from there then arrange something for a later date. It’s all about you feeling comfortable with the situation. You’ll find many of us have first time nerves for various reasons. Go with the flow and enjoy x |
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"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. "
It’s a frame of mind .. but u look good, so just try and relax and be confident... always to do that first jump |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. "
From what i can see you look lovely hun. Try just meeting for a few drinks and see where it leads if anywhere. First meet always the worst for nerves anyway (as i found) xx |
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"I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence. "
Buxom you’ve just given me a great new way next time I share a lollipop with a lady .. thank u.. and totally agree with what u say above x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence. "
Theres nothing wrong with your body at all, and with that gorgeous red hair too, I'm wowed! |
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Have a look at all the forum threads in praise of a curvy figure. Type curve, curvy or BBW into the forum search bar. You will see from reading them that women like you are in high demand on fab.
As has been suggested to to socials or a club where you can remain clothed and don't have to be sexual with anyone.
When it comes to confidence though you have to believe in yourself first and foremost |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having a nose at your pics u look totally gorgeous but thinking that way is a mindset the more u think that way the more u reinforce it and the less likely youll meet cos your convincing yourself theyll judge you, if theyre wanting to meet then youve already passed that mark you need to keep reminding yourself your more than good enough and not listen to that little devil whispering in your ear and have fun |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You are a lovely bunch arend you, unfortunately my 30s are hitting me hard, boobs are heading south, having two kids has pretty much destroyed my body and I enjoy cake and wine too much to loose weight theres no full body photos on there for that reason, I don't even get naked infront of hubby so its unlikely i'll be able to do it infront of strangers. I like the idea of social meets (fully dressed complete with a big wooly jumper haha) I couldn't just dive straight in with strangers anyway even if I was a stunner. I hope I can get past all this because it all looks so much fun. Maybe I should just try my hardest to loose weight and get my confidence back. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence.
Theres nothing wrong with your body at all, and with that gorgeous red hair too, I'm wowed!"
Red hair? Which pics can you see ???? |
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"You are a lovely bunch arend you, unfortunately my 30s are hitting me hard, boobs are heading south, having two kids has pretty much destroyed my body and I enjoy cake and wine too much to loose weight theres no full body photos on there for that reason, I don't even get naked infront of hubby so its unlikely i'll be able to do it infront of strangers. I like the idea of social meets (fully dressed complete with a big wooly jumper haha) I couldn't just dive straight in with strangers anyway even if I was a stunner. I hope I can get past all this because it all looks so much fun. Maybe I should just try my hardest to loose weight and get my confidence back. "
I'm sure we will be happy to have a fully clothed no skin on show drink with you |
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"Firstly you look fabulous. Why not meet for a social first meet in a relaxed location and just chat no obligations from anyone and if you want to take it further from there then arrange something for a later date. It’s all about you feeling comfortable with the situation. You’ll find many of us have first time nerves for various reasons. Go with the flow and enjoy x"
Great advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You are a lovely bunch arend you, unfortunately my 30s are hitting me hard, boobs are heading south, having two kids has pretty much destroyed my body and I enjoy cake and wine too much to loose weight theres no full body photos on there for that reason, I don't even get naked infront of hubby so its unlikely i'll be able to do it infront of strangers. I like the idea of social meets (fully dressed complete with a big wooly jumper haha) I couldn't just dive straight in with strangers anyway even if I was a stunner. I hope I can get past all this because it all looks so much fun. Maybe I should just try my hardest to loose weight and get my confidence back. "
U dont really need to hit the gym and be a size "perfect" to have fun on here theres plenty of couples and women who love curvier women as well who are in the same boat as u dont put so much pressure on yourself you really do look amazing hes a lucky guy |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence.
Theres nothing wrong with your body at all, and with that gorgeous red hair too, I'm wowed!
Red hair? Which pics can you see ???? "
I think it was a reply to me.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Connect with someone first through messaging and then have a social where you make it clear that no play will take place therefore no one goes home disappointed. If you change your mind during the meet then bonus! When I first met a married couple the husband said for me and wifey to go to the bedroom on our own to get to know each other. This helped with my nerves and hers. When we’d had a good snog and feel of each other then hubby was invited in. |
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Why not meet in a club, that way you can just chat and socialise, or if you feel comfortable then you can play. You don't have to get naked though you can stay clothed which a lot of people do in clubs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP please take this journey at your pace, it's about enjoying yourself with your husband. He obviously adores you and wants you to enjoy yourself sexually.
I am not body confident and totally understand your nerves, but a lot of the time the other people do not see you as you see yourself. To them they crave you, you are the fantasy they desire.
Embrace your beauty, curves and class and share yourself with confidence, look at your husband for clues on how sexy you are and believe him.
As Tom Jones once sang "you can leave your hat on" .... or anything else you want to, wear lingerie that compliments your curves and makes you feel lovely and comfortable. Keep your lingerie on during fun, items can be lifted or slid to the side.
Happy to chat via pm if you want to.
C
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am not confident with my figure, this is one of the reasons we go for socials with people first to see if we get on and if we do I let them know how I feel about my body so if things progress they are aware of why I still have lingerie on.
Luckily everyone has understood and this is helping with my confidence.
Theres nothing wrong with your body at all, and with that gorgeous red hair too, I'm wowed!
Red hair? Which pics can you see ????
I think it was a reply to me.
"
Oh god that makes sense haha, I was in full panic mode wondering how I managed to upload a face pic then haha. You do indeed have beautiful red hair |
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I was exactly the same as you but going to clubs has given me tonnes of confidence. So much so that at the sports centre I now get changed in the main area rather than a private cubicle.
Good luck.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"theres no full body photos on there for that reason, I don't even get naked infront of hubby so its unlikely i'll be able to do it infront of strangers."
You look great in your photos! There's not a person on here who doesn't have some part of their body they don't like. And don't forget that you don't need to get naked - get yourself some lingerie that hides what you aren't confident about and boosts the bits you are! |
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I was like this OP, found out guys arent worried about wobbly bits or imperfections, everyone has them. I am now not in the least bit bothered, had so much fun at various weights, personality is probably the sexiest thing and honestly, you look great and will definitely be very popular. Also wear a little something when it comes down to it, helps with confidence xxx |
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My wife has the same issue as you.But beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
There is nothing wrong with you,you look amazing. I had to tell my wife the same thing all the time.She has lost some weight now because she wanted to for health reasons.But My love for her now is just the same as what it was when she was larger.To me she will always be sexy.xx |
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By *ikilovesCCouple
over a year ago
village life, closest main town inverness |
"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. "
.
A club would probably suit you guys perfectly, it did for us to dip our toes in anyway lol
Choose your club wisely and you can have a really good night out even if you don't get up to any naughtiness
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think if you’re feeling like that it’s better to focus on your own self confidence before meeting anyone else.
It won’t matter how much someone tells you you’re beautiful, if you don’t feel it, you’re not going to believe it are you!
X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"From what I can see you look gorgeous.
Go to a club, you can stay dressed and just socialise but you will see people of every shape and size, and it is truly beautiful. As are you x "
This is definitely good advice and it actually helped me gain confidence to the point I have no body issues either on or off Fab anymore. Confidence / happiness then shines and for the first time in years I’ve been approached (twice) in the street and asked out so Fab has been good for me. Try the club with your lovely man at your side and enjoy!
In terms of someone quoting your red hair, you do mention it in your profile so the poster may have actually read it. Quite a rarity on fab!
Good luck! |
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"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about. "
IF you choose the right people they will understand and go very slowly with you at your pace. Its genuinely not a daunting as you think. Also remember most guys prefer curves to sticks xx |
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"We've been on this site for a while now, we started with the intention of finding someone to have some fun with but as the months have passed i've realised i'm not confident enough in my own skin to meet up with people in real life, I enjoy the forums, hubby enjoys the messaging but I honestly think I would freeze if I had to get naked infront of someone has anyone else tried to meet someone but then totally chickened out last minute?
The fear of meeting up with someone and then loosing mt bottle is real, plus i'd be messing alot of people about.
IF you choose the right people they will understand and go very slowly with you at your pace. Its genuinely not a daunting as you think. Also remember most guys prefer curves to sticks xx"
Sticks? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No one likes to cuddle a stick
Why would anyone cuddle a stick? You wouldn't be disrespectful enough to refer to slim women as a piece of wood now, would you? "
No disrespect ment.
I would describe them as slim or athletic |
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"No one likes to cuddle a stick
Why would anyone cuddle a stick? You wouldn't be disrespectful enough to refer to slim women as a piece of wood now, would you?
No disrespect ment.
I would describe them as slim or athletic"
OK. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My other half (needlessly) worries about her shape - she’s posted above - but to be honest theres a lot of us guys that like a curvy shape. Whilst there’s no denying a slim athletic figure is attractive there is also something incredibly womanly about curves. The ‘mother figure’ has been worshiped since ancient times and I really think it has a place in our psyche. We wouldn’t have survived long as a species if as soon as a woman had a baby and got a mum tum no man would touch her again.
From your own profile you mention your hubbys sexy ‘dad bod‘ you clearly are attracted to a guy with a few extra pounds, what’s the surprise with it being true the other way?
As others have said, take your time, maybe try a club (first weekend after payday is usually busier so you’ll feel less exposed) or just meet socially a few times with people you like till you feel more relaxed with them. |
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