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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What's your thoughts on meeting people who have been through a medical ringer?
I'm the Male half of a couple who suffers from crohn's. My battle with this disease has been a long uphill struggle which has left me with some epic scars and a stoma bag.
A couple of occasions weve chatted and met with people who all of a sudden aren't horny once I've removed my shirt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But I shouldn't have to disclose about it, I'm the same as everyone else.. "
In an idea world you shouldn’t but let’s face it things are far from ideal. Personally something like that wouldn’t bother me but I do agree it’s best to give people a heads up. If nothing else it will save you from wasting your time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Congratulations for battling through, and having the confidence to do this when you have been through so much shows how much progress you have made. I honestly think if you are planning on full swap you should disclose because then everyone is being honest. Honesty above all else is the most attractive thing in swinging for most of the people we have met! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wouldn’t put us off but would have wanted to know before hand as some people may not handle it very well if just presented at the final step of a meet. Swingers relay on open and honesty not revealing this may make us question what else you have disclosed |
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Op I’ve seen several post from other members who have been through the mill with medical issues, some of whom have a stoma bag like you. For most, they tend to let people know before a meet happens. Some choose to put it on their profile, others disclose in messaging.
A stoma bag would not put us off meeting someone who ticked all our boxes but not knowing beforehand would come as a huge shock when it came to getting naked. I would like to know in advance so that I could be aware and prepared. Also I would like to know in advance so that we could discuss with you if there are any things off limits physically or any things which would cause you pain/discomfort. Last thing I’d want to do is hurt someone through my ignorance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mine's not as dramatic as that, but I do always say "I have xyz, it means abc during sex, is that OK?" before I meet anyone. "
You're good, I'm dyslexic...![](/icons/s/wink.gif) |
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Personally, I’d have no issue with it but I would like to know beforehand. And if I was the one in your position I would explain about it before the meet to save any awkwardness. Some people just don’t know how to react to the unexpected and it could be uncomfortable for them and in turn, you.
Lou x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Autism...
But I've got a sickness rageing through my body at the moment limiting me and don't know what will happen next.
Probably won't die...might get cut up by surgeon....might recover
Couldn't walk and was in loads of pain for a month.
How I can walk and do some part time work but can't run or anything.
Still in pain but was in torture pain for a while. |
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I’d be honest, it would stop any awkward situations occurring in future.
I was in a situation about a year ago where a guy didn’t mention something significant physically and I only discovered it “in the bedroom”, let’s just say, it killed the moment completely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It wouldn't put me off, but I'd want to know beforehand, because of the dynamics of the meet.
My illness is invisible, I have a heart condition (not angina)
I always tell the guys I meet and tbf, once they know the dynamics they are fine.
One of my boys is a Dr so he is well versed in it lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have told people about my M.E some didn't reply others it didn't bother it affects the positions I can get in and means I'm dead tired after the fun most understand but I'm always up front but being told or not a stoma bag wouldn't put me off x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve got some epic scarring after fighting (and winning ) a battle with breast cancer 3 years ago. Yes it makes me paranoid, yes I hate the scars and the way my body now looks but it sure beats the alternative MissR |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m with the majority on this one. It shouldn’t make a difference but unfortunately to some it will. So just let them no before hand. If they choose not to meet their loss. X |
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"I’ve got some epic scarring after fighting (and winning ) a battle with breast cancer 3 years ago. Yes it makes me paranoid, yes I hate the scars and the way my body now looks but it sure beats the alternative MissR "
Congratulations on winning your fight. A friend of mine went through the same and I can only admire the inner strength it takes ![](/icons/thumb_up.png) |
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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago
Plymouth |
I have Arthritis but I don't tell people unless I need to it doesn't affect me sexually at all! Apart from I prefer to give blow jobs than use my hand as it's more comfortable for me.
A stoma wouldn't put me off but I'd like to know in advance it would be a shock else.
We have met someone who only had one arm. He was so good with hand he did have I didn't realise until he said.
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I do tend to warn anyone I intend on sleeping with that I suffer from endometriosis and adenomyosis, mainly due to the constraints it might put on the fun.
I also have some hefty scars on my left leg which I mention so as it's not a shock.
Personally I'd like to know before meeting someone just so I don't over step boundaries through ignorance. |
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