FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > who gets it easier on here?
who gets it easier on here?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Who gets the most attention here? We assume it's the ladies. Single guys, it must be hard.
Us couples seem to do all the chasing. Surely it's the women on here that get most messages? I imagine every new fem here must get swarmed with messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I first joined fab as a single woman, and very nearly deleted my account the very same day as I was so overwhelmed by the amount of messages I got in the space of a few minutes, before I'd even uploaded a pic. |
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"I first joined fab as a single woman, and very nearly deleted my account the very same day as I was so overwhelmed by the amount of messages I got in the space of a few minutes, before I'd even uploaded a pic. "
Glad you stayed  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No I don't think they do, not to the extent that some of them claim. Realistically they will get a % from those who are friends, a % from people they met in a club/social, only a small % will be from first message contact |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"Who gets the most attention here? We assume it's the ladies. Single guys, it must be hard.
Us couples seem to do all the chasing. Surely it's the women on here that get most messages? I imagine every new fem here must get swarmed with messages"
I would also assume it is single ladies both new and exsisting members.
I opened a single account once to use just for posting on the forums.
It had no photos and no information at all, yet within an hour had around 60 emails 
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"You think that because a single female gets alot more mail that its easy for her!!!
No think they get the most attention (mails)
Don't think it is easy for them at all.
"
Was for the OP's as they have given the thread the heading "Who gets it easier on here..."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I opened an account once pretending to be a single girl just to see what it was like!even with no photo I got 100's of messages in minutes! It opened my eyes somewhat and made me appreciate why you don't get replied to a lot of the time! I don't message anyone new now until they have been able to get through the initial deluge! |
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I'm a single female and I don't think its easy we mite get a lot of mail but we get a lot of unwanted attention from single men and we have to decide which ones are gen and which ones aint and went we meet we have to make sure its going to be fun and safe at the same time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single female and I don't think its easy we mite get a lot of mail but we get a lot of unwanted attention from single men and we have to decide which ones are gen and which ones aint and went we meet we have to make sure its going to be fun and safe at the same time"
i couldn't agree more...my profile is very specific and yet i still get bombarded with messages from guys who don't fit the bill....but then we all know nobody actually READ's a profile !  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Attention? Definately the single girls! But whether or not that makes it easier - somehow i doubt it! The same can be said to a certain extent forr couples.
As a single guy, yes I'll always get less messages - but those that i do (in general) are from people who've genuinely read my profile and are at least a little intrigued and interested in knowing more. single girls will get bombarded by all and sundry (and yes - by a lot who can't be arsed to read profiles and are just working the numbers game!) and will have to decide how much time to spend sifting through endless incoming junk! Couples will have to decide whether both are interested in the person/couple getting in contact and whether that person/couple is indeed interested in both - or just one of them!
So yes - i'm not as busy as some - but certainly happy with the way things are going - so i'd argue that in a way those genuine single, respectful and serious single guys that put in the time and effort - possibly have it easier than the single girls and couples in a lot of ways! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think any profile involving pussy whether you are a couple or a single female get a lot of attention on this site. We've got no complaints and know we have it a lot easier than single men, could see how single females might have a hard time fighting off the wronguns though
It's a hard old life eh!?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single female and I don't think its easy we mite get a lot of mail but we get a lot of unwanted attention from single men and we have to decide which ones are gen and which ones aint and went we meet we have to make sure its going to be fun and safe at the same time
i couldn't agree more...my profile is very specific and yet i still get bombarded with messages from guys who don't fit the bill....but then we all know nobody actually READ's a profile ! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time..."
whats your secret to getting so many posts, please look at my profile and say what i'm doing wrong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive been on here as a couple with my ex and as a single for the past 2 years since we split, i get far far more messages now than i did when i was on as a couple, i think its harder for couples because whoever chooses to mail you has to like the look of both of you and its very hard to find people who like you both, where as on my own people only have to like me so that puts my chances of mail up by 50%, plus even tho we did used to meet single guys as a couple i think most guys would sooner meet a woman on her own than have to share her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time..."
really? 
are they all from new people contacting you for meets or does that mainly include friends chatting?
ive never had a guy say he gets upto 20 messages a day lol
most of the guys i have mailed have told me im the only person whos mailed them in weeks lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive been on here as a couple with my ex and as a single for the past 2 years since we split, i get far far more messages now than i did when i was on as a couple, i think its harder for couples because whoever chooses to mail you has to like the look of both of you and its very hard to find people who like you both, where as on my own people only have to like me so that puts my chances of mail up by 50%, plus even tho we did used to meet single guys as a couple i think most guys would sooner meet a woman on her own than have to share her"
Not always! Nothing wrong with sharing!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive been on here as a couple with my ex and as a single for the past 2 years since we split, i get far far more messages now than i did when i was on as a couple, i think its harder for couples because whoever chooses to mail you has to like the look of both of you and its very hard to find people who like you both, where as on my own people only have to like me so that puts my chances of mail up by 50%, plus even tho we did used to meet single guys as a couple i think most guys would sooner meet a woman on her own than have to share her
Not always! Nothing wrong with sharing! "
well that was a reason i concluded as to why i get more single guys mailing me now than i did when i was a couple |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time...
really?
are they all from new people contacting you for meets or does that mainly include friends chatting?
ive never had a guy say he gets upto 20 messages a day lol
most of the guys i have mailed have told me im the only person whos mailed them in weeks lol"
I don't count ping pong chatting messages in that number as they'd be impossible to count, mainly due to me being able to gob for England, given the chance lol!
I'd say half my messages are from peole I've already met asking me if I fancy meeting or even just when I'm free or telling me a lovely new fantasy or idea they've had. These messages are a joy to get as perhaps its the fact that a bond of some sort has already been built? The other half are from new contacts, but I'd estimate a third of these are from gay men or TV's. Out of the remainder, which is about 6 or 7 on a busy day or perhaps 3 or 4 on a quiet day there are definitely some that appeal to me... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time...
really?
are they all from new people contacting you for meets or does that mainly include friends chatting?
ive never had a guy say he gets upto 20 messages a day lol
most of the guys i have mailed have told me im the only person whos mailed them in weeks lol
I don't count ping pong chatting messages in that number as they'd be impossible to count, mainly due to me being able to gob for England, given the chance lol!
I'd say half my messages are from peole I've already met asking me if I fancy meeting or even just when I'm free or telling me a lovely new fantasy or idea they've had. These messages are a joy to get as perhaps its the fact that a bond of some sort has already been built? The other half are from new contacts, but I'd estimate a third of these are from gay men or TV's. Out of the remainder, which is about 6 or 7 on a busy day or perhaps 3 or 4 on a quiet day there are definitely some that appeal to me... "
well if you get any from a sexy TS that you aint got time to reply to send them my way lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time...
really?
are they all from new people contacting you for meets or does that mainly include friends chatting?
ive never had a guy say he gets upto 20 messages a day lol
most of the guys i have mailed have told me im the only person whos mailed them in weeks lol
I don't count ping pong chatting messages in that number as they'd be impossible to count, mainly due to me being able to gob for England, given the chance lol!
I'd say half my messages are from peole I've already met asking me if I fancy meeting or even just when I'm free or telling me a lovely new fantasy or idea they've had. These messages are a joy to get as perhaps its the fact that a bond of some sort has already been built? The other half are from new contacts, but I'd estimate a third of these are from gay men or TV's. Out of the remainder, which is about 6 or 7 on a busy day or perhaps 3 or 4 on a quiet day there are definitely some that appeal to me... "
Now normally i'd take any such claims with a pinch of salt - but just had a peek and have to say - pretty good job on the profile! And given your verifications I guess you might not be fibbing! So well done - just watch out in case the rest of the single male population start cutting and pasting your profile! lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time...
well if you get any from a sexy TS that you aint got time to reply to send them my way lol "
I will be sure to Madam, the ones that are looking to meet women too in any case. Truth be told I always reply to all messages, maybe not straight away due to my busy life, but I do at least reply telling them sorry but I'm straight and wishing them well in their search. See that's another advantage of being a single male, if I were female replying to every message would take 3 hours daily, which I simply wouldn't have the time to do either, it would take far too long just to read all the buggers... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The average single woman gets the most messages but from my own perspective being a single guy is the best boat to be in.
My message received dailu amount varies from around eight to twenty, probably around a dozen most days. Plenty of choice but still perfectly manageable.
Personally I'd hate to be in the single woman bracket, having to sift through a thousand messages every couple of days just find one that's suitable. I simply wouldn't have the time...
Now normally i'd take any such claims with a pinch of salt - but just had a peek and have to say - pretty good job on the profile! And given your verifications I guess you might not be fibbing! So well done - just watch out in case the rest of the single male population start cutting and pasting your profile! lol "
I shall bear that in mind, thank you for the warning, lol! Though any bloke who did would be a bit of an idiot as hekd be found out before long, and I imagine delectable ladies like copy and paste merchants even less than the three line no pic brigade. Imaginative lovers are so much more fun and to half inch someone else's profile shows the least imagination or amount of effort that can be put into a profile whatsoever.
I also thank you for the compliments, but believe me for the first weeks on site my profile consisted of a couple of lines of text and no pics and needless to say I got bugger all in the way of attention lol! Silly really because I've always found writing comes easily to me and thinking up naughty fantasies, putting them into words to appeal to a lady and taking pics of myself with exactly the same intentions are all activities I enjoy doing! Granted, not as much as running my tongue up a delectable lady's leg from toes to slit or penetrating a naughty minx to the core...  but enjoyable nevertheless! And one does tend to lead to the other... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I first joined fab as a single woman, and very nearly deleted my account the very same day as I was so overwhelmed by the amount of messages I got in the space of a few minutes, before I'd even uploaded a pic.
Glad you stayed "
So am i, would never have met Mr Tall, or any of the other fab people ive started to get to know, and would have missed out on a hell of a lot of fun times too. xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single female and I don't think its easy we mite get a lot of mail but we get a lot of unwanted attention from single men and we have to decide which ones are gen and which ones aint and went we meet we have to make sure its going to be fun and safe at the same time
i couldn't agree more...my profile is very specific and yet i still get bombarded with messages from guys who don't fit the bill....but then we all know nobody actually READ's a profile ! "
i've always read a profile before i have messaged anybody, but i still can't believe how rude people are to not send a 'no thank you' or put on profile 'if we delete your message it's not personal but don't like you'. I seriously get annoyed by the fact i've looked at their profile, but they don't look at mine.
Yes i've only had 1 meet from here, yes i don't have a 9" shlong, yes i'm not Brad pitt and yes i'm not good looking.
BUT MANNERS COST NOTHING
okay off my soap box! I feel sorry for the couples and ladies who are bombarded with emails from people who are too far away, or have no intention of meeting.
but there are some of us out there who do read profiles and are polite (although sometimes I wonder why I bother)
apologies for the preachy post  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single female and I don't think its easy we mite get a lot of mail but we get a lot of unwanted attention from single men and we have to decide which ones are gen and which ones aint and went we meet we have to make sure its going to be fun and safe at the same time
i couldn't agree more...my profile is very specific and yet i still get bombarded with messages from guys who don't fit the bill....but then we all know nobody actually READ's a profile !
i've always read a profile before i have messaged anybody, but i still can't believe how rude people are to not send a 'no thank you' or put on profile 'if we delete your message it's not personal but don't like you'. I seriously get annoyed by the fact i've looked at their profile, but they don't look at mine.
Yes i've only had 1 meet from here, yes i don't have a 9" shlong, yes i'm not Brad pitt and yes i'm not good looking.
BUT MANNERS COST NOTHING
okay off my soap box! I feel sorry for the couples and ladies who are bombarded with emails from people who are too far away, or have no intention of meeting.
but there are some of us out there who do read profiles and are polite (although sometimes I wonder why I bother)
apologies for the preachy post "
Manners cost the average single lady a couple of hours a day replying to emails, if you count all the "no thanks" messages included with the ones that may lead somewhere. If I received between four hundred and a thousand messages a day (fifty times the amount of messages I do now, which is expected as there's probably between fifty and a hundred guys on here for every single fem), anyone who expected me to reply to every one of the between two and five hundred of the ones that HAD read my profile I would consider possessed THE HEIGHT OF BAD MANNERS, especially as whilst I was spending hours sending out the same old boring "no thanks" message and wanting to slit my wrists with the sheer fucking boredom of such a monotonous task I would be consistenly online, therefore "more reachable" by the desperate and fresh messages would be pouring in every minute, all needing a "no thanks" in the name of good manners. I would not have the time nor the inclination to spend the amount of time that I'd normally devote to a part-time job sending out messages that weren't going to lead anywhere simply in the name of the supposed bullshit that "manners cost nothing".
I think the plenty of posters who bleat consistently about how manners cost nowt need to wake up and realise the way things actually work on a site like this, not just for yourself, but for all other parties as well, as not to think about what others have to cope with is selfish in the extreme. And as far as I can see it selfish folk shouldn't have any part to play in a scene that revolves around pleasuring others as much as yourself.
Rant over! I'm normally a lot more easy-going believe it or not... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
i've always read a profile before i have messaged anybody, but i still can't believe how rude people are to not send a 'no thank you' or put on profile 'if we delete your message it's not personal but don't like you'. I seriously get annoyed by the fact i've looked at their profile, but they don't look at mine.
Yes i've only had 1 meet from here, yes i don't have a 9" shlong, yes i'm not Brad pitt and yes i'm not good looking.
BUT MANNERS COST NOTHING
okay off my soap box! I feel sorry for the couples and ladies who are bombarded with emails from people who are too far away, or have no intention of meeting.
but there are some of us out there who do read profiles and are polite (although sometimes I wonder why I bother)
apologies for the preachy post "
Reading that, and in particular the "it seriously annoys" you comment, then are you sure this is the right site for you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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the deleting of message's is only part of the annoyance for me.
like i said i take time to look at profiles, and send a message that isn't a one liner, rude or degrading. if i spend time writing and reading at leats someone can do the same.
and no i've never had someone message me without me messaging them first so i guess your one of the lucky ones mr lick 77.
Guess i should go back to the clubs which is where i learnt my manners and etiquette for swinging where a polite no thanks is considered good etiquette, not an ignore or a fuck off!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the deleting of message's is only part of the annoyance for me.
like i said i take time to look at profiles, and send a message that isn't a one liner, rude or degrading. if i spend time writing and reading at leats someone can do the same.
and no i've never had someone message me without me messaging them first so i guess your one of the lucky ones mr lick 77.
Guess i should go back to the clubs which is where i learnt my manners and etiquette for swinging where a polite no thanks is considered good etiquette, not an ignore or a fuck off!
"
Fair play that you're sending polite messages, and a "fuck off" is a rude reply and plain bad manners.
However not replying to messages isn't because of the reason I explained earlier. You can't even compare the site with a club. Unless you were to imagine a club where a lady is with a gent she finds appealing whilst 400 blokes keep approaching and interrupting proceedings in turn so that she doesn't have any actual fun, just spends the evening repeatedly saying "no thank you". Sound fun? I think in her shoes I would feel entitled to ignore most of them.
If you can't understand this then perhaps the site isn't for you and you should just stick to clubs mate.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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apologies mr lick and everyone in forum, just been having bad time. been sending out alot of messages and not getting any response.
kind of dis heartening.
i won't commment on this thread again |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"apologies mr lick and everyone in forum, just been having bad time. been sending out alot of messages and not getting any response.
kind of dis heartening.
i won't commment on this thread again"
Why are you apologising... Chin up, move on... And hope your luck changes soon. |
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