FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > What would stop you messaging us?
What would stop you messaging us?
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Maybe because you say you want people who show their face on there profile as it would put us off, some can’t show face pics on profile. But that’s the only thing I could think, we would meet you 
Molly
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week. "
Wanting face pictures on first message. We know you are showing yours and we probably would send ours but we think majority of people want to make contact first, make sure you are ok people, then send them at their leisure when THEY are comfortable to do so. No point in typing out a nice message for you to just delete as no face pics attached. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Distance 
But you really don’t seem to be doing too badly - and you have to appreciate you can’t and won’t appeal to everybody.
And also - just because they’ve viewed and not contacted you - doesn’t mean they don’t like you - they might be hot listing you for the future, when time and opportunity is right. That’s what we usually do |
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I agree with others that the expectation of a face photo, would be an issue. It makes me wonder if you grasp the necessity for most on here to be very careful.
Many of us do jobs, where finding out you are on a swinging site could cause problems. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are the views from single guys? Because you have them all blocked "
Doesnt include single guys only shows couples and ladies.
If it included single men you could double if not triple it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I get that face pics can be a problem. Only reason is that we find attaction from faces. "
For some it won't be a problem, just maybe not as many as you've hoped. Just a bit of patience
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If we were in your age range it would be the requirement
for the face pics, requirement to be clean shaven and no body pics of the man.
Mrs "
The age range is a guide as i would consider us to have younger faces then our ages. Ive seen some people that are older then our age range that we would meet but they are rare. |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"I get that face pics can be a problem. Only reason is that we find attaction from faces. "
Not saying folk wouldn't send face pictures, just not with first message. That's what would put folk off. We all need the attraction but establishing we are compatible is always a good start. Personality is just as important as looks in our opinion |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I get that face pics can be a problem. Only reason is that we find attaction from faces.
Not saying folk wouldn't send face pictures, just not with first message. That's what would put folk off. We all need the attraction but establishing we are compatible is always a good start. Personality is just as important as looks in our opinion "
I get that and its a hard balance but its easier to tell if your attacted to someone then if you have chemistry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I get that face pics can be a problem. Only reason is that we find attaction from faces. "
Face pic request puts me off too. But if it's what you want that's cool. It will just put the people off who don't want the same things. |
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Most of the answers you get will be because you aren't what the people who look are wanting or vice versa. For instance I'm straight and 22 years older than your top age.
We get hundreds of views a day and on days like today only one message. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week. maybe coz your blocking guys from messaging u. "
This doesnt include single guys as only shows you compatible matches.
Either that or every single guy that looks at us is using stealth mode |
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Like everyone else says about face pics expected, this life is a dirty secret to most and not something you’d want all your family and freinds to know you do so we don’t put face pics on but if after a few messages you seem to click most people will send a face pic before meeting!
Other than that your pics are great, good looking couple and a fabulous body on the mrs so you should be getting plenty of offers |
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By *bzcoupleCouple
over a year ago
Aberdeenshire |
Face pics being required may be off-putting. Sometimes people don’t want to show their faces until a meet is on the cards, not because they are munters, but because they want discretion and that’s more likely if they don’t hand out face pictures willy nilly!
Also, some folk are just pervs 
We like your profile, but you’re a bit far away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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as it's your profile, if you want x,y or z then you're only setting out your stall aren't you.
most of us don't know or see the demographics of the fab membership and if we did then that may just change all of our perceptions as a result.
for sure, you could change some of your parameters to widen the attraction of others, but that's down to you both.
we found that it's easier to meet people at clubs, social and parties rather than just be here so perhaps that might help - happy FAB'ing
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Look at it another way OP - for ease of maths let's say you get 7 new messages a week, which is one message from every 100 views.
If you remove people, out of that 100 views, who are outside your age range, whose criteria you don't fit, or they yours, then take away those that don't see an attraction based on your pics - none of which anyone could know without looking at your profile - the number of messages per view is actually a lot less than 1:100, possibly as low as 1:10 which is not a bad hit rate when you look at it that way |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Incompatible.
You're asking for face pics on profile, for us that's an absolute no no! We CANNOT do that which many on here don't understand, via private messaging we can work with it."
It should read profile or message.
At least thats what i thought i typed. I understand the need for privacy for some people but for us as busy people filtering out people that we wont be attacted to saves us alot of time. I know it sounds harsh and i dont mean it to be rude but we just need to filter it down. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmmmm I can’t chat to you as I’m a single guy... your stats could be recording singles.
Just a thought...
The other thing is i always swerve people who demand pictures straight up! As there’s loads of picture collectors on this site. Plus who wants to send their face pic and never hear back or be blocked it’s rude and happens a lot on here.
I’m not suggesting you do that it’s just peoples behaviour changes on this site due to historical treatment.
I got one get quite fed up with it xxxx |
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You've had 9 meets. Which is good going.
Also, because you've already given your face pic, people don't have to message you to see if they are attracted to you. Not everyone will be attracted to you, and that's ok. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hmmmmm I can’t chat to you as I’m a single guy... your stats could be recording singles.
Just a thought...
The other thing is i always swerve people who demand pictures straight up! As there’s loads of picture collectors on this site. Plus who wants to send their face pic and never hear back or be blocked it’s rude and happens a lot on here.
I’m not suggesting you do that it’s just peoples behaviour changes on this site due to historical treatment.
I got one get quite fed up with it xxxx"
It definatly doesnt record single males at all.
I guess, i just easier to stop endless messages to find out your not atracted to some 1 |
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"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week. "
I am thinking this is a narcissistic question. You have blocked single men from messaging. That's fair enough, but to pretend you don't know why you get far fewer messages than views is disingenuous. "Just curious". I bet you are. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week.
I am thinking this is a narcissistic question. You have blocked single men from messaging. That's fair enough, but to pretend you don't know why you get far fewer messages than views is disingenuous. "Just curious". I bet you are. "
actually... blocking men kinda gives the answer without knowing the answer...
bear with me.... method in madness coming!
single men are to couples.... what couples are to single women! loads of one group chasing a smaller number of the other
so couples can block single guys from contacting then, but there isn't a thing in place for the ther...
so just because a couple is here... it doesn't mean they are owed a single bi fem! they have to almost think of it the way that single men have to do with couples...
give them a reason as to say "wow i have to meet these people!!!"....
what makes you stand out from any other couples seeking the same thing?
mindset..... loads of couples think they rule the roost and doen't have to do any work.... might be the case if they are after single men (although actually i would say say that is arguable since the popular men are popular) but thats not the case for single bi fems......
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week.
I am thinking this is a narcissistic question. You have blocked single men from messaging. That's fair enough, but to pretend you don't know why you get far fewer messages than views is disingenuous. "Just curious". I bet you are. "
As our view dont count single men its not narcissitic at all. As you have failed to read the previous comments then you came to this thread with the sole purpose of being an ass hat. |
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I wouldn’t message as you’ve not had an ‘in person’ meet since 2017 (going by your versus) and I would assume you’re not that serious about meeting so just wouldn’t bother making a connection on that basis.
Rest of the profile is fine and you’ve got great pics, just lacking body pic of Mr.
Sassy |
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"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week.
I am thinking this is a narcissistic question. You have blocked single men from messaging. That's fair enough, but to pretend you don't know why you get far fewer messages than views is disingenuous. "Just curious". I bet you are.
As our view dont count single men its not narcissitic at all. As you have failed to read the previous comments then you came to this thread with the sole purpose of being an ass hat. "
Do you mean to say that if you block certain categories, views from that category are not counted? If so, I was not aware of that feature and I apologise. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week.
I am thinking this is a narcissistic question. You have blocked single men from messaging. That's fair enough, but to pretend you don't know why you get far fewer messages than views is disingenuous. "Just curious". I bet you are.
As our view dont count single men its not narcissitic at all. As you have failed to read the previous comments then you came to this thread with the sole purpose of being an ass hat.
Do you mean to say that if you block certain categories, views from that category are not counted? If so, I was not aware of that feature and I apologise. "
Exactly this for the 5th time this thread. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t message as you’ve not had an ‘in person’ meet since 2017 (going by your versus) and I would assume you’re not that serious about meeting so just wouldn’t bother making a connection on that basis.
Rest of the profile is fine and you’ve got great pics, just lacking body pic of Mr.
Sassy"
We have had a meet since but the couple verified us by cam and didnt re verify us. Reminds me i need to verify them. Always forget to do it. |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"I wouldn’t message as you’ve not had an ‘in person’ meet since 2017 (going by your versus) and I would assume you’re not that serious about meeting so just wouldn’t bother making a connection on that basis.
Rest of the profile is fine and you’ve got great pics, just lacking body pic of Mr.
Sassy"
definitely this is affecting your chances |
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You will always get more views than messages.
You can't message without viewing and you need to view to check.
Ages
Sexuality
Preferences
Verifications
Photos
Distance
Profile text
Anyone of the above could put someone off who was intreged enough to click on your profile.
The right combination is always a balancing act.
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"You will always get more views than messages.
You can't message without viewing and you need to view to check.
Ages
Sexuality
Preferences
Verifications
Photos
Distance
Profile text
Anyone of the above could put someone off who was intreged enough to click on your profile.
The right combination is always a balancing act.
"
Exactly. |
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"You will always get more views than messages.
You can't message without viewing and you need to view to check.
Ages
Sexuality
Preferences
Verifications
Photos
Distance
Profile text
Anyone of the above could put someone off who was intreged enough to click on your profile.
The right combination is always a balancing act.
Exactly. "
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By *am4CamWoman
over a year ago
Fairy Land |
"Just curious as we get 50-100 profile views a day but maybe 5-6 messages a week. "
Back in the day (on my old profile) when I was looking to meet couples, you would have got my attention. It’s a nice, honest profile with good pictures and sound verifications. It’s a tough crowd on here, but chin up and persevere. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You will always get more views than messages.
You can't message without viewing and you need to view to check.
Ages
Sexuality
Preferences
Verifications
Photos
Distance
Profile text
Anyone of the above could put someone off who was intreged enough to click on your profile.
The right combination is always a balancing act.
Exactly.
"
Yeah i was just trying to gauge which of these was putting people off. Seems to be location and the request of pictures.
I know we are not every1s cup of tea, and i dont expect every couple or single lady to message us. Also we get a lot of winks but if i message back(which is a simple "thanks for the wink if you fancy chatting then message us back") its usually just read and not replied to. |
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No issue with the face pic requirement, we generally send face pics straight off the bat anyway. Just geographic distance, so you wouldn’t even come up on our searches. Everyone should just live in Manchester, it’ll make things so much easier! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You simply don't float everyone's boat. None of us do.
Do you send messages to every profile you look at? I definitely don't.
"
I dont expect a message of every single person. As i stated i was just curious. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You simply don't float everyone's boat. None of us do.
Do you send messages to every profile you look at? I definitely don't.
I dont expect a message of every single person. As i stated i was just curious."
Wasn't suggesting you do...
I'm merely pointing out that there could be 100s of different reasons why people don't message you. We all like different things, that's all |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No issue with the face pic requirement, we generally send face pics straight off the bat anyway. Just geographic distance, so you wouldn’t even come up on our searches. Everyone should just live in Manchester, it’ll make things so much easier!"
Or everyone could just live in london
The london swingers scene seems quiet compared to the north |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
After reading the posts on this thread and your replies OP you seem very defensive and negative so that's more so why we wouldn't message to be honest. The forum and the little green arrow is a great tool for us all. |
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"Or everyone could just live in london
The london swingers scene seems quiet compared to the north"
That does seem to be the case. I lived in London for nine years, in Manchester for three, and there’s just so much more going on up north. Even when we’ve both visited London and tried to arrange a social, responses have been almost non-existent, even with single guys (which I know you’re not looking for).
For comparison though, we’re hardly active at the moment, and whenever we do log into fab, we’ll get maybe 20 messages from single guys and just one message from a couple if we’re lucky. This is fine for us - I know many other couples and single women can be a bit put off by the age difference and attraction/fitness gap between us both, so we mainly use fab to keep updated on the scene and our playtime is just at clubs these days (of which we have many to choose from - maybe London isn’t as lucky there).
You have nothing to worry about - you seem like our type to hang out with, so let’s campaign for the high speed railway to get built! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"After reading the posts on this thread and your replies OP you seem very defensive and negative so that's more so why we wouldn't message to be honest. The forum and the little green arrow is a great tool for us all. "
I dont intend to seem negative so i apolgize if i come across that way. I been told im very direct which i can see may come arcoss as defensive. Its weird as im extremly laid back in my day to day life. Maybe my written word gives the wrong impression of me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Or everyone could just live in london
The london swingers scene seems quiet compared to the northThat does seem to be the case. I lived in London for nine years, in Manchester for three, and there’s just so much more going on up north. Even when we’ve both visited London and tried to arrange a social, responses have been almost non-existent, even with single guys (which I know you’re not looking for).
For comparison though, we’re hardly active at the moment, and whenever we do log into fab, we’ll get maybe 20 messages from single guys and just one message from a couple if we’re lucky. This is fine for us - I know many other couples and single women can be a bit put off by the age difference and attraction/fitness gap between us both, so we mainly use fab to keep updated on the scene and our playtime is just at clubs these days (of which we have many to choose from - maybe London isn’t as lucky there).
You have nothing to worry about - you seem like our type to hang out with, so let’s campaign for the high speed railway to get built!"
i definatly need to go back to manchester. Havent been for a good few years. Went there for football and went to bar that was basically manchesters answer to coyote ugly. |
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from another old girl x