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Introducing New girlfriend to Swinging
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Any1 else struggle at getting the right moment to mention previous swinging lifestyle to their Girlfriends/Boyfriends etc??
Dunno how she will take it if I mention at wrong moment??
I can’t keep away from fab and always perving when I get chance?? and fantasising but I would never cheat on her! But
I want to get her involved as I have a Very huge Sexual Apputtite , and reckon she’d only be up for it after few drinks !
Lol
Any tips ideas etc ??  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never understood why this is such a drama. Just tell her.
Although best not to mention you think if she was pissed she'd be up for it aso she may be concerned by your questionable understanding of consent |
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"Any1 else struggle at getting the right moment to mention previous swinging lifestyle to their Girlfriends/Boyfriends etc??
Dunno how she will take it if I mention at wrong moment??
I can’t keep away from fab and always perving when I get chance?? and fantasising but I would never cheat on her! But
I want to get her involved as I have a Very huge Sexual Apputtite , and reckon she’d only be up for it after few drinks !
Lol
Any tips ideas etc ?? "
Hmm maybe start by being honest with us on here xxx and update as appropriate x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Speaking from experience if it’s something you desire it will always be there so you need to address it and if it’s not her bag.. find someone who it works with .. you need to have shit in common or minds wonder theu curiosity... find a partner who you can be curious with xxx |
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"Speaking from experience if it’s something you desire it will always be there so you need to address it and if it’s not her bag.. find someone who it works with .. you need to have shit in common or minds wonder theu curiosity... find a partner who you can be curious with xxx"
Wow and where is the compromise in a relationship lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Speaking from experience if it’s something you desire it will always be there so you need to address it and if it’s not her bag.. find someone who it works with .. you need to have shit in common or minds wonder theu curiosity... find a partner who you can be curious with xxx
Wow and where is the compromise in a relationship lol "
Compromise I believe only works if you two are completely into each other and if you were that into each other you would know that each other had this side.. only speaking from experience doesn’t mean I’m right ... |
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Firstly do not get her pissed first if you are going to talk about it it needs to be done with clear heads.
Second be honest if as you say you are no longer an active swinger tell her it's something you have done in the past but you would only do it in the future with her and not behind her back.
Third if you do talk about it you need to let her know you are still on here, if she is not interested and then finds out you are here she will not believe you are not active, and who could blame her.
most of all be honest. |
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"Speaking from experience if it’s something you desire it will always be there so you need to address it and if it’s not her bag.. find someone who it works with .. you need to have shit in common or minds wonder theu curiosity... find a partner who you can be curious with xxx
Wow and where is the compromise in a relationship lol
Compromise I believe only works if you two are completely into each other and if you were that into each other you would know that each other had this side.. only speaking from experience doesn’t mean I’m right ..."
I disagree about the into each other part its all about honesty and communication at the start might just be me but I'm reading he wanted a swinging partner not a gf x |
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"Drinking is not the way ! Just ask her if she's ever thought about being with some1 else she may be thinking the same thing ,"
He’s not talking getting blind d*unk he’s talking s few drinks to unwind and help things flow |
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"Drinking is not the way ! Just ask her if she's ever thought about being with some1 else she may be thinking the same thing ,
He’s not talking getting blind d*unk he’s talking s few drinks to unwind and help things flow "
He said he thinks she'd only be up for it after a few drinks. This means if she was 100% sober he doesn't think she would be. That isn't the same thing as unwinding and going with the flow. |
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Which is more important to you OP? Your actually gf who, presumably, has sex with you, or perving strangers on Fab? If the answer is your gf, weigh up whether it's worth the risk of losing her if you bring it up and she doesn't like the idea. If losing her doesn't really bother you, then ask away... What have you got to lose? If losing her would be devastating.... Well... I think you answer your own question. |
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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
I think most people have a naughty side - some are very open to exploring it, some might need some gentle convincing (this could take years) and others never will.
You should be able to tell if she has a lot, a little or no interest in the idea of a non-monogamous relationship, and take it from there.
If you really like the idea and she really hates the idea, then perhaps you're not right for each other in the long term - no point in ending up on here as a cheater.
Plus, don't introduce her to fab unless she's really up for it, it's not a good starting point for the totally uninitiated.
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95% of women would not be up for a non monagamous relationship, so if you met your gf in a "normal" way (as opposed to on a place like this), it's highly likely she won't be up for it and she won't like it that you are into swinging.
As others have said, you need to work out how important she is to you. |
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I think, from what I've read on fab that for some men certain sexual fantasies are all consuming and they simply can't live without fulfilling them. So much so that they would genuinely give up an otherwise good relationship rather than the fantasy. I'm not saying the op is one of these guys but for those that are I think they need to be clear from day one that certain things are essential to them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Communication is the key OP if you think or reckon then you do not know, only knowing something is reality everything else is just your perception which will usually be wrong. Fantasy never usually works in reality. Male  |
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"I think, from what I've read on fab that for some men certain sexual fantasies are all consuming and they simply can't live without fulfilling them. So much so that they would genuinely give up an otherwise good relationship rather than the fantasy. I'm not saying the op is one of these guys but for those that are I think they need to be clear from day one that certain things are essential to them."
I agree, but the difficulty is that very few women are up for said fantasies, so given these guys also want to be in a relationship deceit seems the only option. |
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"Which is more important to you OP? Your actually gf who, presumably, has sex with you, or perving strangers on Fab? If the answer is your gf, weigh up whether it's worth the risk of losing her if you bring it up and she doesn't like the idea. If losing her doesn't really bother you, then ask away... What have you got to lose? If losing her would be devastating.... Well... I think you answer your own question. "
If he Neverdon asks he will never know she may like it and sonetimes we all need a drink to get brave enough to do things wether its talk to the hot girl at the bar or enter a swingers club it don’t mean we’re dojng something we don’t want to |
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