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what really mean vanilla...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla.... "
i can agree with that in some ways
When you ask whats vanilla means most will say every day sex, but most of the guys i meet of here just want the type od sex i used to have with my ex, is that not using a sex site for vanilla sex?
I suppose it depends how you see vanilla |
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla.... "
ahhhh the judgemental nature of bdsm folk ,the reason i avoid them 
vanilla is a type of ice cream, all other interpretations are personal and therefore not a mistake. |
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla....
i can agree with that in some ways
When you ask whats vanilla means most will say every day sex, but most of the guys i meet of here just want the type od sex i used to have with my ex, is that not using a sex site for vanilla sex?
I suppose it depends how you see vanilla "
i would say they are using the site for nsa sex...which comes in many forms...i really dislike the way bdsmers use it to disparage non kinky though..,
i tend to use it to mean anything that is inside conventional norms, so for swingers to use it to describe non swingers is sensible to me...perhaps the question is how many of the men contacting you for nsa sex are swingers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"perhaps the question is how many of the men contacting you for nsa sex are swingers"
to true
But then just as everyone sees whats vanilla different everyone sees whats classed as swinging different too. i dont class myself as a swinger, i use swingers sites to get sex but i dont think that makes you a swinger |
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"perhaps the question is how many of the men contacting you for nsa sex are swingers
to true
But then just as everyone sees whats vanilla different everyone sees whats classed as swinging different too. i dont class myself as a swinger, i use swingers sites to get sex but i dont think that makes you a swinger"
oh i agree, and there is an argument that swinging only makes sense as a couple since it is about breaking conventional norms of monogomy...though not an arguement i share.
i find many bdsm folk very vanilla, and so are some swingers. To me the word is an indications of a certain blinkered mindset and attitudes....you may not be a swinger but you are certainly not nilla |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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origin of the use of vanilla: the first time this word was used to describe a way of life, it was in the book "histoire d'O" by Pauline Reage, O discover the bdsm relation, and then it was explain to O that the other world is "vanilla".....so, the word vanilla is clearly linked to the bdsm world as the opposite....sorry for that, it s just litteracy reference....  |
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"origin of the use of vanilla: the first time this word was used to describe a way of life, it was in the book "histoire d'O" by Pauline Reage, O discover the bdsm relation, and then it was explain to O that the other world is "vanilla".....so, the word vanilla is clearly linked to the bdsm world as the opposite....sorry for that, it s just litteracy reference.... "
ohh you read books too, here was me just thinking my tatoo was a letter of the alphabet.
The origin of the word does not mean it is set in stone, language evolves...people are not mistaken , they simply saw a useful term and used it..
btw i would check your translation... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And so we can't use it then?
Does it really matter?
BDSM and swinging are both classed as non norm by society so vanilla really does apply to both as a term of plain sex life
Irrelevant which discipline first coined the phrase
I'm pretty sure most long term swingers know where it originated |
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"yep soapy, you re right, but i was just explaining something, not create a debate.....lol....jem, i love you..;-)"
no you were being patronising and telling swingers they were mistaken...
If we take your reference to o , how is it not her sexual behaviour ,which is far more transgressive in the eyes of the day, rather than her being beaten...which is described as nilla?  |
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"*grabs popcorn ( seeing as I know how much Jem loves this subject)
Cali "
sorry cali, i am off to meet some very vanilla, apparently, swingers, after having a drink in a bar with a very vanilla, ts ,later to be fingered by my Master...who is pissing himself at the thought of someone lecturing me on my training manual
enjoy your pop corn tho...i so always enjoy being told bt bdsmers i am doing it wrong...proves im doing it right |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK, so maybe swingers should get their own flavour. How about Raspberry Ripple, as it's Vanilla but with a fruity streak  "
What flavour would bdsm be then? Walnut whip?
This could be the start of a new craze! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla.... "
But why vanilla? (seriously) |
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla....
But why vanilla? (seriously)"
From wiki...
The term "vanilla" derives from the use of vanilla extract as the basic flavoring for ice cream, and by extension, meaning "plain" or "conventional". In relationships where only one partner enjoys less conventional forms of sexual expression, the partner who does not enjoy such activities is often referred to as the vanilla partner. As such, it is easy for them to be branded unadventurous and dull in sexual matters.[4] Through exploration with their partner, it is possible for a more vanilla-minded person to discover new facets of their sexuality. For others, such exploration is not a positive experience, and they may find the practices they are comfortable with are sufficient for their satisfaction. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla....
But why vanilla? (seriously)
From wiki...
The term "vanilla" derives from the use of vanilla extract as the basic flavoring for ice cream, and by extension, meaning "plain" or "conventional". In relationships where only one partner enjoys less conventional forms of sexual expression, the partner who does not enjoy such activities is often referred to as the vanilla partner. As such, it is easy for them to be branded unadventurous and dull in sexual matters.[4] Through exploration with their partner, it is possible for a more vanilla-minded person to discover new facets of their sexuality. For others, such exploration is not a positive experience, and they may find the practices they are comfortable with are sufficient for their satisfaction."
Well we learn something everyday (or should do). Thankyou for your explanation. |
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"i just want on here to try to explain the real meaning of "vanilla".....The word vanilla is used on the fetish and bdsm scene to design ppls who are not in the bdsm or fetish community, which can include a large part of swingers....when swingers are talking about vanilla as opposite are their lifestyle, it s just a mistake.....;-) as most of the swingers are vanilla.... "
Why don't you just "google" it? |
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