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insecure people who swing
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
I am possibly ranting but we arent having much luck on here with meeting sane people the last two couples we met who i wont name even tho they have both now left the site were both very insecure within their relationships. We had the one couple have a domestic after we had all finished playing in front of us as he had been rude to me and moaned about her having all the fun despite the fact i was a willing participant. Then the other couple we met a few times socially and sexually and they have dragged us into all kinds of their domestic problems and the woman is now trying to damage our relationship with lies and fantasist talk. Has anyone else had any experience of this and if so how do you see the warning signs to know they are nutters or insecure and shouldnt be playing |
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Sorry to say it but combine D/s and swinging and you are a target for all the numpties out there.
You just need to fine tune your nutter antennae, who is doing the choosing, you, your master or both of u? |
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Heh, reminds me of an "adonis" and a "barbie" we got chatting to in a bubble bath once.
We headed of for the water massage room, Peg thought she had it made.
Peg ended up getting a "sports massage" leaving her hardly able to move afterwards. Seemed like he wasn't appreciating seeing "barbie" getting attention. |
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These kinds of scenarios can be pretty common and not always easy to spot - I guess one of the benifits of meeting and playing in a club is that you're less likely to become involved on a deeper level on people's personal entanglements (Though we would freely admit that this can happen in a club too)
Its like any group at the end of the day, not everyone gets into something for the right reason or intentions, sometimes they do but it goes tits up anyway. Every tree has bad apples, you just have to do you're best not to pick up the ones that have fallen on the ground as it were. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP, that sounds very distressing for you both.
We had insecure people upset our first few swinging months and learnt a lesson from it.... we even deleted our profile so they thought we had quit the scene lol.
We now have to meet our potential playmates in social situations before committing to having a bit of fun.... we need to feel that a) we are all clicking together and b) they are 'secure' with themselves.
One thing is for sure, we are happier and have found friendships this way  |
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"OP, that sounds very distressing for you both.
We had insecure people upset our first few swinging months and learnt a lesson from it.... we even deleted our profile so they thought we had quit the scene lol.
We now have to meet our potential playmates in social situations before committing to having a bit of fun.... we need to feel that a) we are all clicking together and b) they are 'secure' with themselves.
One thing is for sure, we are happier and have found friendships this way "
Aha! I knew it was you!!!!  |
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"Heh, reminds me of an "adonis" and a "barbie" we got chatting to in a bubble bath once.
We headed of for the water massage room, Peg thought she had it made.
Peg ended up getting a "sports massage" leaving her hardly able to move afterwards. Seemed like he wasn't appreciating seeing "barbie" getting attention."
Absolutely classic lol.
Poor Peg!!!  |
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By *ynandiCouple
over a year ago
manningtree |
It is very hard to know that they are nutters, some of them hide it very well till too late!!
we met this one couple years ago, they were brill to start with, had regular fun and was really cool became good friends, but then all of a sudden the fem started acting weird, watching Ky play with her bloke but in an obsessive way, like if ky was giving him oral her face was right in hers, Ky stopped, it became very uncomfortable for us both, and then started accusing Ky of having an affair with her bloke! she became very stalkerish, and even went marching into Kys place of work shouting her mouth off in front of her own daughter!! We cut them out completely and ignored thier calls until they got bored n stopped. the bloke (poor guy) was a really nice guy as well! We assume they dont do it anymore.
It did put us off for a while, but soon came bouncing back n very glad we did!! have met some awesome ppl since |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am possibly ranting but we arent having much luck on here with meeting sane people the last two couples we met who i wont name even tho they have both now left the site were both very insecure within their relationships. We had the one couple have a domestic after we had all finished playing in front of us as he had been rude to me and moaned about her having all the fun despite the fact i was a willing participant. Then the other couple we met a few times socially and sexually and they have dragged us into all kinds of their domestic problems and the woman is now trying to damage our relationship with lies and fantasist talk. Has anyone else had any experience of this and if so how do you see the warning signs to know they are nutters or insecure and shouldnt be playing"
The sensible thing to do if you feel insecure while swinging is to wear skis. |
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
"It is very hard to know that they are nutters, some of them hide it very well till too late!!
we met this one couple years ago, they were brill to start with, had regular fun and was really cool became good friends, but then all of a sudden the fem started acting weird, watching Ky play with her bloke but in an obsessive way, like if ky was giving him oral her face was right in hers, Ky stopped, it became very uncomfortable for us both, and then started accusing Ky of having an affair with her bloke! she became very stalkerish, and even went marching into Kys place of work shouting her mouth off in front of her own daughter!! We cut them out completely and ignored thier calls until they got bored n stopped. the bloke (poor guy) was a really nice guy as well! We assume they dont do it anymore.
It did put us off for a while, but soon came bouncing back n very glad we did!! have met some awesome ppl since "
Sounds like exactly like the problem I have at the moment she has even started to get her friends on here to verbally abuse me now I would like to give up but he wants us to carry on and just avoid the nut jobs maybe we should just meet at clubs from now on |
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
"Sorry to say it but combine D/s and swinging and you are a target for all the numpties out there.
You just need to fine tune your nutter antennae, who is doing the choosing, you, your master or both of u?"
We both pick who we meet and both talk to them before meeting. We just need to put the nut job defence guards back up.  |
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"Sorry to say it but combine D/s and swinging and you are a target for all the numpties out there.
You just need to fine tune your nutter antennae, who is doing the choosing, you, your master or both of u?
We both pick who we meet and both talk to them before meeting. We just need to put the nut job defence guards back up. "
yup.sadly once some ppl see u are sub they see a solution to their problems, and hope the dom will either sort them out or tell them what to do
So glad Sir is in charge of that side here |
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You can usually spot the ones that are insecure male or female...
Body language says alot!
But you do have to be face to face with them lol
If you are not 100% sure, dont be afraid to say no thanx...
Hasn't happened to us but have heard stories from others...
Dont let it put you off... |
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
Thanks everyone we have always met verified members in the past and but the couple of bad experiences are just starting to put me off I'm even getting messages from other members now obviously friends of the latest nut job abusing me I'm starting to feel like there is a hate campaign against me lol |
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"Thanks everyone we have always met verified members in the past and but the couple of bad experiences are just starting to put me off I'm even getting messages from other members now obviously friends of the latest nut job abusing me I'm starting to feel like there is a hate campaign against me lol"
report and block anyone who sends an abusive message to admin, its totally unacceptable! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is why we also like to meet socially first. Its a shame so many swing for the wrong reasons "
Guess my situation is slightly different being a single guy - but if I meet a couple socially and get the vibe that one party is just doing it to please the other - or I get a sense that one is not so keen - I'll gladly call it quits and move on! It's no fun for anyone if there's an uncomfortable 'atmosphere' and as others have said there are plenty of happy trusting folk on here comfortable enough in their relationships to enjoy the lifestyle. Guess there's no guarantees but that sadly can't always be avoided!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was in a swing relationship with a guy and it was awful, he hated me playing with other guys but yet made out i had the problem ( the power trip), so it made meets virtually impossible. We had a few meets and i always felt i had to keep an eye on him so he knew i was watching him and not enjoying myself fully, and the sad thing is that he is still on a swing site and sticks to the same few women, but all have become the victims too of his insecurities and arent allowed to play with others, some even to the extent that they have had to hide there profiles as his insecurities wont let them play. But i can tell you this now, IM HAVING A FRIGGIN BALL LOL LOL LOL |
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We had a couple of nutters too, male half of first ones even tried to blame us and say we were pushy lol. On a little fumble his mrs had her head between scarlets legs and was loving it. He said she wasnt bi  . Second couple it was the bloke again, he turned nasty cos scarlet wasnt on facebook over xmas and didnt talk to him lol. Ah well ya live and learn or do we?????? when you find the nutter radar can u send us the link to it too  |
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
"We had a couple of nutters too, male half of first ones even tried to blame us and say we were pushy lol. On a little fumble his mrs had her head between scarlets legs and was loving it. He said she wasnt bi . Second couple it was the bloke again, he turned nasty cos scarlet wasnt on facebook over xmas and didnt talk to him lol. Ah well ya live and learn or do we?????? when you find the nutter radar can u send us the link to it too "
Gladly we really need to find one soon. I have make stalkers who have told me im treated badly by my bloke yet if he treats me so badly how come im at my happiest lol. I dont get what the attraction is but hey its kind of flattering. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks everyone we have always met verified members in the past and but the couple of bad experiences are just starting to put me off I'm even getting messages from other members now obviously friends of the latest nut job abusing me I'm starting to feel like there is a hate campaign against me lol
report and block anyone who sends an abusive message to admin, its totally unacceptable!"
Yeah it's damn right rude sending abusive messages to admin!
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By *ub bbw OP Woman
over a year ago
oldbury |
whats funny is we dont know who these people are we have never met them as singles or a couple yet they seem to enjoy abusing my single profile but dont go near our joint one. They are reported and blocked immediatly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Watch their body language, that says volumes more about what's really going on, only snag is to do that you have to be able to see the whole of them and probably in person. |
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"Thanks everyone we have always met verified members in the past and but the couple of bad experiences are just starting to put me off I'm even getting messages from other members now obviously friends of the latest nut job abusing me I'm starting to feel like there is a hate campaign against me lol
report and block anyone who sends an abusive message to admin, its totally unacceptable!
Yeah it's damn right rude sending abusive messages to admin!
"
ohhh admin might appreciate a few rude messages....they never seem to get any meets
Ok it was early but u bloody know what i meant!  |
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This is a bit of a "Told you so from another thread!" lol 