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Off putting

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

This happens to me fairly regularly. When someone is so keen to meet it puts me right off and freaks me out a bit. I will end up messaging to say thanks but no thanks.

I like to chase a bit to.

Anyone else like this? What stops you in your tracks and puts you off meeting someone?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

When I say keen to meet I mean over keen, like pushy. I don't just mean showing an interest.

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By *inful xWoman  over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeah I know what you mean. When someone gives you too many compliments or perhaps sends a few too many messages. It’s creepy

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Yeah I know what you mean. When someone gives you too many compliments or perhaps sends a few too many messages. It’s creepy "

I don't take compliments well anyway. Funny and sarcastic keeps my attention more than smarmy and nice!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next "

I’m a little confused... can you give a example?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I feel stifled when a man doesn't give me space to get to know when/if I want to meet him.

If I say I have to get to know him before agreeing to meet and then every other message is asking when can we meet, or little hints at are we meeting yet, my brain shuts off and I lose interest.

When I'm ready I'll let them know.

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By *inful xWoman  over a year ago

In a sleepy little village


"I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next

I’m a little confused... can you give a example?"

I've agreed to meet someone , up until that point he put the effort in. As soon as I said yes the effort stops as he had the required result so no need for graft. He moves straight on to the next to graft. Fairly easy to spot as messages to without response and become shorter.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next

I’m a little confused... can you give a example?

I've agreed to meet someone , up until that point he put the effort in. As soon as I said yes the effort stops as he had the required result so no need for graft. He moves straight on to the next to graft. Fairly easy to spot as messages to without response and become shorter. "

Why would he do this? For ego? Or did he have no intention of meeting in the first place?

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By *viatrixWoman  over a year ago

Redhill


"I feel stifled when a man doesn't give me space to get to know when/if I want to meet him.

If I say I have to get to know him before agreeing to meet and then every other message is asking when can we meet, or little hints at are we meeting yet, my brain shuts off and I lose interest.

When I'm ready I'll let them know.

"

Said much more eloquently than I ever could say it...

Thinking that by chatting to them I automatically have agreed to meet/fuck. Erm... no.

I had a social a few days ago and despite not being consumed by the urges to rip his clothes off, I thought things were going ok. Until he said “so, we go back to mine now?” hahaha I was so put out I made my excuses and left!

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By *inful xWoman  over a year ago

In a sleepy little village


"I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next

I’m a little confused... can you give a example?

I've agreed to meet someone , up until that point he put the effort in. As soon as I said yes the effort stops as he had the required result so no need for graft. He moves straight on to the next to graft. Fairly easy to spot as messages to without response and become shorter.

Why would he do this? For ego? Or did he have no intention of meeting in the first place? "

Oh no he has every intention of meeting but he's said what he thinks I want to hear in order to get me to meet. From his actions I can tell what I want and what he wants are a million miles apart

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's a difficult balance to get right I think. There are so many different personalities, likes and dislikes that it is easy to tip the balance one way or another.

As you admit yourself, you enjoy a bit of a chase while some people like to be sure they have your attention.

Fair enough that some cases the extreme is obvious too full on (or too little effort) though

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

But endless emails are not a turn on for anybody. The genuine people I have met on here , just get on with it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This happens to me fairly regularly. When someone is so keen to meet it puts me right off and freaks me out a bit. I will end up messaging to say thanks but no thanks.

I like to chase a bit to.

Anyone else like this? What stops you in your tracks and puts you off meeting someone? "

Yes. If someone starts pushing for a meet after a couple of messages then it's a turn off for sure.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This happens to me fairly regularly. When someone is so keen to meet it puts me right off and freaks me out a bit. I will end up messaging to say thanks but no thanks.

I like to chase a bit to.

Anyone else like this? What stops you in your tracks and puts you off meeting someone?

Yes. If someone starts pushing for a meet after a couple of messages then it's a turn off for sure.

Mrs"

i'm biding my time mrs IOW xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I get put off when I agree to meet up with someone then .... they think that it's in the bag and don't need to try anymore. It's fairly obvious they have already started the hunt for the next

I’m a little confused... can you give a example?

I've agreed to meet someone , up until that point he put the effort in. As soon as I said yes the effort stops as he had the required result so no need for graft. He moves straight on to the next to graft. Fairly easy to spot as messages to without response and become shorter.

Why would he do this? For ego? Or did he have no intention of meeting in the first place?

Oh no he has every intention of meeting but he's said what he thinks I want to hear in order to get me to meet. From his actions I can tell what I want and what he wants are a million miles apart

"

Thank you for clearing that up...

I thought you meant he was trying to set up a three some with you or maybe scheduling a meet for the same day after you have finished meeting him...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Minefield

What is a single meant to do on here?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Minefield

What is a single meant to do on here?"

Just be normal, strike up a conversation like you would in a club. Don't go in full on and all guns blazing, I know this is a swinging site but we are still humans and enjoy having our mind stimulated before our vaginas. It's simple.

How about you? If a woman came upto you in a club and said fancy a fuck and wapped out a fanny pic after only saying 2 words, wouldn't you be like woah back up?!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I do message as if I was chatting face to face.

No mention of sex

Still can’t get a reply

I might write a few love songs see if that gives me a boost lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd probably piss myself laughing if a woman came up to me and said 'fancy a fuck' before wapping out a fanny pic...AND I'd wonder where she'd escaped from...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'd probably piss myself laughing if a woman came up to me and said 'fancy a fuck' before wapping out a fanny pic...AND I'd wonder where she'd escaped from... "

Fancy a fuck? (|)

Mrs

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By *rNightMan  over a year ago

Coventry

I find getting too graphic too soon can be off putting, leave something to the imagination

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Minefield

What is a single meant to do on here?

Just be normal, strike up a conversation like you would in a club. Don't go in full on and all guns blazing, I know this is a swinging site but we are still humans and enjoy having our mind stimulated before our vaginas. It's simple.

How about you? If a woman came upto you in a club and said fancy a fuck and wapped out a fanny pic after only saying 2 words, wouldn't you be like woah back up?! "

Back up? She’d be in a cab before she can change her mind!

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By *hispers-40Woman  over a year ago

up the garden path


"This happens to me fairly regularly. When someone is so keen to meet it puts me right off and freaks me out a bit. I will end up messaging to say thanks but no thanks.

I like to chase a bit to.

Anyone else like this? What stops you in your tracks and puts you off meeting someone? "

it’s like they are pestering a bit desperate in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Minefield

What is a single meant to do on here?

Just be normal, strike up a conversation like you would in a club. Don't go in full on and all guns blazing, I know this is a swinging site but we are still humans and enjoy having our mind stimulated before our vaginas. It's simple.

How about you? If a woman came upto you in a club and said fancy a fuck and wapped out a fanny pic after only saying 2 words, wouldn't you be like woah back up?! "

Problem is that doesn't work on here. Messages like that just get deleted and ignored

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Instant turn off for me is being called Sweety, Darling or such like. Instant delete for me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When I say keen to meet I mean over keen, like pushy. I don't just mean showing an interest. "

Nobody likes pushy. I've had that a few times.

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