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Destroying or making stronger Relationships
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We are fairly new to swinging and had few different experiences so far. Both love each other and have strong relationships for more than 10 years now.
Question is: can one meet change relationships?
I d love to hear about your experiences either with good or bad outcome. xx |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
As ever the key is open and honest communication coupled with boundaries that are respected at all times - it's when those things slip, or when person is continually trying to push boundaries, or loses sight of the relationship that problems will invariably set in, and resentments start to fester. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Very interesting view's
We both are happy and sure but there is always chance that things to go very wrong
Comment about destroying lifes above makes us feel not to do it anymore... |
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Me and my wife was looking to get into swinging, but as I was her only lover for ten years she didn't feel comfortable at first being with another man infront of me, so she met a few guys on her own at first and it soon turned into a hotwife/cuckold relationship. No jealousy on my part what so ever, but needless to say we never did get the chance to try out actual swinging as we separated 12 months after getting married.
Do I blame swinging? Not wholey as we did have other disagreements but the fact she was letting it over rule our every day life did contribute.
Just my ten pence worths lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are fairly new to swinging and had few different experiences so far. Both love each other and have strong relationships for more than 10 years now.
Question is: can one meet change relationships?
I d love to hear about your experiences either with good or bad outcome. xx"
So far so good  
Been “dipping our toes” on and off for 7 years now and still going very strong  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i do know of couples who have split after meeting others and going off with them.
i guess it all comes down to how strong you are together.
good luck, i hope you get what your looking for out of it. |
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"We are fairly new to swinging and had few different experiences so far. Both love each other and have strong relationships for more than 10 years now.
Question is: can one meet change relationships?
I d love to hear about your experiences either with good or bad outcome. xx"
My view on this is simple:
If you've got a strong and stable relationship, neither of you are under any pressure to swing and you're both clear on what your boundaries are... then it can bolster your relationship. If your relationship isn't that solid, it could easily end a relationship.
Cal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have a very strong and stable relationship anyway with complete trust. The only thing we lacked was something that we could do together, just us as a couple. No kids, family or friends involved. We now have that through fab and clubs. Although we aren't overly active it has certainly added to what we already have. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm doubtful that one meet can change things,it's one reason why some couples insist on one off meets only.
It's just common sense that the longer you spend time in another persons company, more chance of emotions taking over.
I think lots of us have fell in lust at first sight but love ? Not likely when you're just meeting to play. |
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So far, our club experiences have done nothing but make our relationship stronger. It's opened us up to each other as we feel total trust in talking about exactly what we'd like to try. We've talked about various scenarios that could happen and what we think we'd feel in each of them and our limits. So we're confident that we can go into a situation knowing where the other's comfort level is.
We also have the 'red button' agreement where either one of us can call a stop at any point for any reason and we'll just get out of the situation. We know we can then rationally talk through what happened and where to go next.
So far we've not had a meet that has gone too far or has left us feeling betrayed by the other. I think that's all down to knowing the others limits and respecting them totally. When you ignore that, you can get out onto pretty thin ice. |
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Agree with much of what has been said. We’ve been together 24 years and I hadn’t been with another man in all that time. We took our time. Went to clubs, socialised and gradually pushed boundaries. It took me a long time to get my head in the right place that the reality of doing what we had fantasisied and talked about for so long wouldn’t destroy what we had.
Needless to say it didn’t and we’ve had the deepest most honest conversations that have taken our marriage to a whole new level.
Communication is key. As is honesty and trust.
If a relationship is already rocky, swinging is unlikely to strengthen it but if you have a solid relationship and agree on rules and boundaries then it absolutely can take it to a whole new level. Our relationship is stronger than it has ever been. Not just a little stronger... like it’s been built on even more solid foundations.
It’s somethibg we do together and as long as we continue to check in with each other about how we feel and what we want I can’t see anything affecting that.
Take your time, after your own rules but most of all, have fun! |
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By *am62Woman
over a year ago
Bristol |
Swinging is a very difficult thing to do. You can enjoy it as couples but the trust has to be there. When you're new to swinging it becomes like a fix the more you swing the more you want to swing. Then you will find you want a complete break from it. I just love to meet new people and have met some great friends and I trust them. |
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I was never in a couple swinging but when I meet someone I deactivated it and lived a vinilla life style. But during my time going to socials and meeting men when it was very still not talked about 10yrs ago it really did distory a few marriage coupled with daily life.
I saw them coming on without each other more. Some even ended up marrying another but mostly now couples are more open with each other more than ever. |
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