FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is it "not cool" to be a "slutty" swinger?

Is it "not cool" to be a "slutty" swinger?

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I'm noticing more and more lately particularly at the clubs that theres seemingly a change of attitude going on, with many girls making a point of "just because I come here doesn't mean I want to fuck anyone" ... of course thats fair enough, but overall it seems to be changing the atmosphere away from what I really enjoy...

For example, 18 months ago, 9/10 times I would get in the hot tub at a club and if I liked the guy/gal on either side of me I'd waste no time putting my hands on their upper thighs to see what kind of reaction I'd get...guys are still the same and quickly move my hand to their dick every time before I can blink, but this type of forwardness seems to be too much for most ladies now whereas in the past they would usually allow me to fondle them and/or reach over for my own leg (or better

if they were keen, otherwise just politely comment that they weren't into girls, weren't playing tonight, I wasn't their type... etc ....as opposed to the snarky remarks and/or dirty looks I've had recently, as if being forward or "slutty" is somehow a sin in a swingers club?

My guy has it much worse... he's always been much more cautious anyway but I've seen girls deriding him for simply sitting too close to them or (genuinely) accidentally brushing his hand across some part of their body at some point...

Really I'm keen to know how many other "naughty" girls like me are out there... I *want* guys to try their luck and touch me, it turns me on to see the guys talking to me accidentally letting their raging hardons slip above the water haha....and I want the sexy girl I'm fingering to tell me her and my guy have been getting each other off for the last five minutes and do I mind if he fucks her...?!

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"I'm noticing more and more lately particularly at the clubs that theres seemingly a change of attitude going on, with many girls making a point of "just because I come here doesn't mean I want to fuck anyone" ... of course thats fair enough, but overall it seems to be changing the atmosphere away from what I really enjoy...

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???"
A woman can get away with that behaviour if a man does it he would get banned from the club. I think asking first when the signals aren't clear would be the right approach.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

It’s POLITE to ask first.... not just dive in... just because someone is in the same club as you, that does NOT entitle you to lay your hands all over them

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By *essica jamiesonWoman over a year ago

edinburgh

With that behaviour " touching a female without her consent will only get u banned from clubs and folk will avoid u!

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

That would annoy us

That wouldn't

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I go to clubs regularly and indulge in what some may call slutty behaviour, but if someone groped me in the way you describe without a clear signal from me that I’m interested I’m afraid they’d see a whole other side to me

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I would expect to be asked, rather than there be an assumption that I will be interested, purely because we are all naked in a hot tub

Nita

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By *inful xWoman over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

This is one reason why I stay clear of hot tubs !

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By *agneto.Man over a year ago

Bham

See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue.

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"I would expect to be asked, rather than there be an assumption that I will be interested, purely because we are all naked in a hot tub

Nita

This and if a man felt me up without my permission or a woman all hell would be let loose!

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"See this is what puts me off clubs. "

Being touched up by an attractive woman?

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"I would expect to be asked, rather than there be an assumption that I will be interested, purely because we are all naked in a hot tub

Nita

This and if a man felt me up without my permission or a woman all hell would be let loose! "

Too bloody right

I'm normally really chilled but I'm told that I'm positively scary when I get properly angry. Sexual assault is likely to make me angry...

Nita

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"of course thats fair enough, but overall it seems to be changing the atmosphere away from what I really enjoy..."

No offense but other people are not there to provide you with what you enjoy unless it is also what they enjoy

"but this type of forwardness seems to be too much for most ladies now whereas in the past they would usually allow me to fondle them and/or reach over for my own leg (or better

Touching without permission is not permitted in the clubs I know so what you are doing is more than being "forward"

Much simpler to look at a woman, give her your best come to bed smile and say "I would really like to touch you"....is that really so difficult for people!

I question the reason behind people touching without permission. It is almost as if you want to shock the person and cause discomfort or embarrassment because it causes you sexual excitement to do so.

...but perhaps I read to much into it.

All I know is despite it being a fantasy to have sex with someone without a single word being spoken between us I simply cannot get past someone not apparently caring if I wanted their sexual advances. If only they had tried to engage with me somehow, a look, a smile, or a compliment instead of feeling my arse in the dark while I was looking in the other direction....

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

[Removed by poster at 31/10/18 21:25:35]

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By *alandNitaCouple over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue. "

We love clubs... the type of behaviour this couple seem to employ is not acceptable and will likely get you banned from any decent club.

Nita

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Regardless of where you are, a club or not

Touching someone, without any prior interaction, no sign of acceptance, or your actions being encouraged?

Wrong!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

From now on bring a written consent form in the hot tub.....

Just ask everyone to sign it before you touch them....

Just make sure to keep the pen behind your ear so it doesn’t get wet....

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"From now on bring a written consent form in the hot tub.....

Just ask everyone to sign it before you touch them....

Just make sure to keep the pen behind your ear so it doesn’t get wet...."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

Oh, sexual assault when a polite "can I touch you" would do.

Classy.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

It's pretty regular violence really

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If someone puts their hands on me and I don't like it what do you think I'd do about it?

Respect people.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"From now on bring a written consent form in the hot tub.....

Just ask everyone to sign it before you touch them....

Just make sure to keep the pen behind your ear so it doesn’t get wet...."

Or you could just try obtaining verbal consent, it's not that difficult.....well not for those of us with developed social skills.....

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say we are totally with the op on this one .

When swinging clubs became more like social clubs we stopped going , and that was a few years ago now .

There are still a few swingers left who think like the op , and we are two of them . It’s easy to say no if someone is touching you inappropriately in a hot tub . And the spontaneity is totally lost if you have to engage in consent forms every time you play . We would often simply move away or say no if someone wasn’t to our taste in the hot tubs at Chams . No problem . But we had way more fun with strangers there than anywhere else , most of which started with a bit of a touchy feels fun in the hot tub , and rarely did anyone feel the need to ask first .

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say we are totally with the op on this one .

When swinging clubs became more like social clubs we stopped going , and that was a few years ago now .

Bit narrow minded. My wife has to fill out a spreadsheet after each meet. It's great fun reading it.

We would often simply move away or say no if someone wasn’t to our taste in the hot tubs at Chams . No problem . But we had way more fun with strangers there than anywhere else , most of which started with a bit of a touchy feels fun in the hot tub , and rarely did anyone feel the need to ask first .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady!

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

I do prefer the GB / Party scene, pretty much everyone knows whats going to happen.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mixed feelings on this. If some touched me, say on the arm or leg without asking it wouldn't be a big deal, but if they dived straight for my 'bits' then that would be wrong, although I wouldn't make a drama out of it, just a polite word from my hubby would do the trick, no need to get violent!

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

What I would call a sensible reply, there is something about sex with strangers that attracts the casual approach.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady! "

It's never been ok to touch someone without their consent.

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady!

It's never been ok to touch someone without their consent. "

Well this totally depends on the person who solicits the advances of someone else .

If we were to insist on every person we have met asking first , we would have had 20% of the fun we had . And we would have stopped playing after a few months as we would have become bored by then .

What works for us , and the op by the sound of things is the spontaneity , the not knowing what’s going to happen and with who , the whole surprise element with a stranger . And that’s the thing that you need to understand about it . The ‘stranger’ is the very epitome of what makes these encounters so horny . Once the stranger becomes an acquaintance , they are no longer a stranger . And thus , the thrill has gone . The very ethos of what makes it horny is no longer there ! So gaining consent first detracts from the fun .

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

"I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady!

It's never been ok to touch someone without their consent.

Well this totally depends on the person who solicits the advances of someone else .

If we were to insist on every person we have met asking first , we would have had 20% of the fun we had . And we would have stopped playing after a few months as we would have become bored by then .

So true

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

Oh, sexual assault when a polite "can I touch you" would do.

Classy.

It's sleezy shit like this that puts people off going to clubs. No one has the right to touch anyone without consent. Vile behaviour

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

Oh, sexual assault when a polite "can I touch you" would do.

Classy.

It's sleezy shit like this that puts people off going to clubs. No one has the right to touch anyone without consent. Vile behaviour

So probably better to arrange stuff in advance. GBs, parties, meets where you all know it's pretty surely going to happen?

I've been in a bar in the Village when a woman with her husband recognised me from here whipped my cock out and wanked me off in the crowd by the bar. It was not something I expected or asked for. The main introduction was "you're _eddonistik off fab aren't you?" I did not object.

In the Village a lot of meets have been purely instigated by a glance. You just take it as meaning that someone is wanting to suck a cock, be fucked etc.

Happy to be open minded regarding names.

Mike X

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/18 03:18:37]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

Oh, sexual assault when a polite "can I touch you" would do.

Classy.

It's sleezy shit like this that puts people off going to clubs. No one has the right to touch anyone without consent. Vile behaviour

So probably better to arrange stuff in advance. GBs, parties, meets where you all know it's pretty surely going to happen?

In the Village a lot of meets have been purely instigated by a glance. You just take it as meaning that someone is wanting to suck a cock, be fucked etc.

Happy to be open minded regarding names.

Mike X

You obviously didn’t mind that and good for you.

That’s not to say every single person you meet is going to be the same.

This talk of “spontaneity” is rubbish, you can easily say “Can I” and they give you a nod and it still be spontaneous, there is absolutely no need to be touching people without their consent.

If a man/woman you had zero attraction to had touched you without your consent in the way that woman did, you’d have most likely had more of an issue with it, which says it all.

If people were really okay with this so called “spontaneity” they’d be okay with anyone regardless of looks/gender touching them without asking, but you’re actually only okay with people you want to fuck touching you.

It is not too hard to quickly ask, it also saves a lot of trouble.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you can still be slutty and do it the right way ?? i (mrs) would not dare to touch anyone without knowing i have consent and god help the person who touch me without asking this has nothing to do with ''nowdays'' by the way this was how it was when we started 20 years ago and its was how we we're told by other swingers at the time who been swinging for years before us .... its that golden rule Entitlement don't exists and no is no

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady!

It's never been ok to touch someone without their consent.

Well this totally depends on the person who solicits the advances of someone else .

If we were to insist on every person we have met asking first , we would have had 20% of the fun we had . And we would have stopped playing after a few months as we would have become bored by then .

I do understand what you're saying. It's the scenario that makes it hot.

I can see both sides. The couple wanting all the men to touch her without speaking. And the couple that just want to be watched fucking in the open, but get groped and don't want that.

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple over a year ago

Old Hill

Agree with OP I think women are more empowered and more likely to get vocal if someone touches them without consent. Personally I go to a club to be touched, etc. So don't lose my shit if someone touches me/sticks their dick near my mouth when I am playing. I can still say no.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???"

Youre in the wrong lace to ask this

In general in most clubs, whether the non swingers like it or not that is what happens on a regular basis. Of the clubs I attend regularly I dont know a a single club that would ban you, man or woman, for that action. If you continued after any sort of negative reaction then yes, man or woman you would at least get warned if somebody you complained.

But what you described is very much the norm in the more established clubs.

Oh and by the way, I have zero interest in a big long self righteous debate with any of the forum born again virgins if I agree or disagree or if it's right or wrong.

It is just fact about what happens. I have made at a guess in excess of 1500-2000 club visits so quite comfortable with my knowledge.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"See this is what puts me off clubs.

Being touched up by an attractive woman?

Attractive isn’t perceived the same by everyone.

Personally, I don’t go to clubs for women, I go for men. If he has a partner I find attractive I may be interested in her too.

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By *oan of DArcCouple over a year ago

Glasgow

"See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue. "

You don't have to be telepathic or read signals, a simple 'are you interested' question removes all the anxiety created by doubt!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Touching without consent. Totally out of order.

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By *etro1940sCouple over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

Really I'm keen to know how many other "naughty" girls like me are out there (me) ... I *want* guys to try their luck and touch me, it turns me on to see the guys talking to me accidentally letting their raging hardons slip above the water haha (yes please) Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers??? (yes, we are old school erotic)

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By *etro1940sCouple over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

"I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say we are totally with the op on this one .

When swinging clubs became more like social clubs we stopped going , and that was a few years ago now .

"
Totally understand and agree - we go swinging to be erotic and be aroused, not to be on egg shells or timid ... a respectful no thanks is all that is needed

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

[Removed by poster at 01/11/18 09:08:39]

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By *illyDudeMan over a year ago

norh east

Maybe it's just confidence rather than being slutty. People I've found on this scene can go one of two ways. Really accepting or very judgemental. Maybe if you ooze confidence your branded as slutty?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not in the book club or rotary club but here yes it's cool

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"See this is what puts me off clubs.

Being touched up by an attractive woman?

Attractive isn’t perceived the same by everyone.

Personally, I don’t go to clubs for women, I go for men. If he has a partner I find attractive I may be interested in her too. "
There are universal attractive traits which the lady in the OP appears to have though.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why is it every time I climb naked into a hot tub at a swingers club, smiling at the slightly tipsy attractive couple floating around giggling, the guy starts talking to me and the woman thinks it’s ok to start touching me...

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK LADY!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So before you touch are you at least getting some sort of signal ?? Eye contact cheeky smile exchanges ?? Anything of just straight in ??

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"I’m a little confused by the idea someone actually thinks because women aren’t interested in them that makes the women involved at clubs just for the social kicks.

I’d be absolutely fuming if either a man or woman touched me at a club without in some way gaining consent.

This kind of ‘swinger’ is exactly what puts me off attending clubs alone as a single lady!

It's never been ok to touch someone without their consent.

Well this totally depends on the person who solicits the advances of someone else .

If we were to insist on every person we have met asking first , we would have had 20% of the fun we had . And we would have stopped playing after a few months as we would have become bored by then .

I do understand what you're saying. It's the scenario that makes it hot.

I can see both sides. The couple wanting all the men to touch her without speaking. And the couple that just want to be watched fucking in the open, but get groped and don't want that."
This is dilemma at tines when couples will just be playing then give you a wave over to join them. In the past I haven't wanted to discuss boundaries etc as to not kill the mood but you have to as some couples think every single guy is bisexual.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP makes some good points, there seem to be more and more socialite, non swingers in clubs nowadays it’s just how it is.

However it has become prevalent for many players to not engage in conversation or permission before trying to initiate play and it frankly annoys us that people earlier in the evening ignored us, didn’t return eye contact and now want to join in playing with us.

The fundamental problem at clubs is until you get in the playrooms you have no idea who are actually there to swing, so this causes a fracture in the club, players won’t talk to people in the bar as they have no idea if the people they are talking to actually swing with other people so don’t waste there time, they just head straight for the play areas and try to join in with people, without gaining verbal consent, which is wrong x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/18 09:47:10]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"From now on bring a written consent form in the hot tub.....

Just ask everyone to sign it before you touch them....

Just make sure to keep the pen behind your ear so it doesn’t get wet...."

Got to be pc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I go to clubs. Sometimes on my own. Sometimes I'm looking to play. Sometimes I go to catch up with friends and see what happens.

I don't wish to be touched by anyone without them asking me first! There are a fair few people on this thread with the "You can politely say no" attitude (after being touched). That doesn't make it OK! I'd be totally uncomfortable if I was getting my upper thigh grabbed by people in the hot tub (Or anywhere else). Why would people just assume that this is ok/you're attracted to them?

Most clubs have rules with regards to touching without consent. I'm most comfortable in clubs that enforce this rule.

There's PLENTY of fun to be had without making others feel uncomfortable

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"I go to clubs. Sometimes on my own. Sometimes I'm looking to play. Sometimes I go to catch up with friends and see what happens.

Most clubs have rules with regards to touching without consent. I'm most comfortable in clubs that enforce this rule.

There's PLENTY of fun to be had without making others feel uncomfortable "
Yeah hot tubs generally have a strict no play policy too. It's not hygienic

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Im not sure but i think here i think theres some confusion to what the OP is saying. There's a difference here between just jumping in and fully groping someone and a cheeky stroke of a leg as a way of showing interest.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Mixed feelings on this. If some touched me, say on the arm or leg without asking it wouldn't be a big deal, but if they dived straight for my 'bits' then that would be wrong, although I wouldn't make a drama out of it, just a polite word from my hubby would do the trick, no need to get violent! "

My thoughts exactly, there is nothing wrong with a harmless touch to the arm or thigh, if you don't like it then politely ask them not to do that. Omg there are way too many uptight people in here and there is definitely no need to rude or violent, if that is the case then you shouldn't be going to a swingers club.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Im not sure but i think here i think theres some confusion to what the OP is saying. There's a difference here between just jumping in and fully groping someone and a cheeky stroke of a leg as a way of showing interest. "

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman over a year ago

London

"Maybe it's just confidence rather than being slutty. People I've found on this scene can go one of two ways. Really accepting or very judgemental. Maybe if you ooze confidence your branded as slutty?"

I am very confident and will let no one touch me without permission. However, we are all able to judge when and how that permission is given. "Do you mind?" with a smile is quite a nice way or asking for it. And no, I do not play with strangers. If they want to be intimate, they should also be prepared to be civil and introduce themselves. If I am attracted to someone, I will want to address them by their name, not "you there".

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

Some people on this thread are really not getting the point here . It’s the usual shock horror type of attitude , without actually thinking it through .

As I said before , there are people like us and the op who like the random , spontaneous encounters . A major part of this will often be the female making subtle advances , and she doesn’t want to know about details , consent , etc.....

Anyone can say no , why is this so difficult ?

We are adults and at the end of the day the fact we are on a swinging site , and attending swinging clubs means we are more liberated than most . Or are we ?

I have no issue with anyone who insists on the whole ask first consent thing at all . I’m not saying that’s wrong , I’m merely saying there are different strokes for different folks . Why should people like us be slated because we enjoy a different type of fun ?

I would also say that we spent three years regularly attending clubs and not a single night ended with any issue whatsoever because of our style of play . No one , male or female complained or got funny with us . It wasn’t as if my wife would just jump on people without knowing they were up for it , and there were occasions when a polite no thanks was exchanged both ways . Especially on a Monday night at Chams , and guys would often be there more fire man on man action . But never anger , never raised voices , just a simple no thanks . Do you really think she would just grab a guys cock or shove a finger up a woman’s pussy ? Of course not ! Eye contact , a smile , a brush of a thigh then a bit longer , then a rub , and a bit of a grope both ways was the way it started . So horny and especially knowing it was a stranger .

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By *tirluvMan over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

"See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue. "

That must cause a fair few traffic accidents

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"Some people on this thread are really not getting the point here . It’s the usual shock horror type of attitude , without actually thinking it through .

Anyone can say no , why is this so difficult ?

We are adults and at the end of the day the fact we are on a swinging site , and attending swinging clubs means we are more liberated than most . Or are we ?

"
In this day and age you gotta be certain it's gonna be reciprocated though.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A gentle thigh or arm stroke from the person I’m talking to - fine by me and I can’t see how that can be interpreted as assault. But if I say no, please don’t pretend you didn’t hear.

Fingers in my fanny from some randomer I couldn’t even see, as at the weekend? Definitely not. THAT is what puts people off open room club play I would think.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"Some people on this thread are really not getting the point here . It’s the usual shock horror type of attitude , without actually thinking it through .

Anyone can say no , why is this so difficult ?

We are adults and at the end of the day the fact we are on a swinging site , and attending swinging clubs means we are more liberated than most . Or are we ?

I know what you mean. One of our club highlights was a couple who we just looked at and had instant chemistry with. We didn't even know their names until everything was done. You don't need to be reaching for consent forms when each of you has a beaming smile and are already butt naked.

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

"Some people on this thread are really not getting the point here . It’s the usual shock horror type of attitude , without actually thinking it through .

Anyone can say no , why is this so difficult ?

We are adults and at the end of the day the fact we are on a swinging site , and attending swinging clubs means we are more liberated than most . Or are we ?

Hit the nail on the head.

. This is how we have found the etiquette in clubs all over the world.

Far too much shock-horror in these replies where people have not read the OP correctly.

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By *ixedblkinjectionMan over a year ago

london

Never been to one of these type of clubs before; but would express the same courtesy I extend in any other area of life!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Some people on this thread are really not getting the point here . It’s the usual shock horror type of attitude , without actually thinking it through .

Anyone can say no , why is this so difficult ?

We are adults and at the end of the day the fact we are on a swinging site , and attending swinging clubs means we are more liberated than most . Or are we ?

Agree with you on pretty well every point here apart from everyone here being liberated!

We're all for the casual spontaneity and would prefer that others would just get stuck in without hesitation. A look should be enough.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple over a year ago

Cramlington

No easy answers to this one,or so it seems, but here goes.

You can't assume consent even in a hot tub. I might not object to a wandering hand but if I do you've got no place to go - you've done something I didn't want to happen. What's so difficult about asking? It might not even be that the no you get relates to you - sometimes the no relates to us being knackered after an hour long puppy pile or the like. (Although it might also relates to you being that guy with a phone in his pocket in a playspace...) There shouldn't be any need to say all this and it doesn't stop spontaneous play...

We often play with multiple people in clubs but we set the rules and part of carter's role is to police that. Hilariously that often extends to him inviting people in to play when they're doing the polite thing of standing and waiting...

Ultimately the reality is the rules have changed but there's no need for that to be a drama - we can all still play and the moment when someone asks shall we play is just as sexy as a hand on the thigh...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some people are naturally touchy feely. I wouldn't snarl if a light touch on my arm/leg was a polite request for implied consent.

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By *tirluvMan over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

"Never been to one of these type of clubs before; but would express the same courtesy I extend in any other area of life!!!"

No double dipping then I take it

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By *ugs and JunkCouple over a year ago

Bellshill

So because you like doing it and are horny at the time it makes it perfectly ok to just lay hands on someone? I think not. If someone, male or female just decided to touch me in the anticipation it would lead to more it would end up in a swift kick to the balls/vag.

Just because people are swingers doesn’t mean they will fuck anything and that you will be their type

Mrs

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

With all the violence being threatened due to a light touch on the leg or arm I suggest swinger clubs need to erect an Octagon for some UFC combat.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is the problem. Some people take not being touched without asking as lack of interest. Some people take it as assault. No one wants to make their preference clear ahead of time and wants to make it the toucher's problem.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Umm, you don’t just go touching another person without permission. How you havn’t been knocked out by now is a mystery! Always ask before you touch anyone on any part of their body!!

H x

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By *uckslut and MCouple over a year ago

Poole

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???"

As I elbow you out the way to get the attention, in a good way. Yes, I am a total slut. I'm there to sample and share the fruits of tge forbidden forest. Yes, If I'm flirting and giving the " fuck me eyes". I / we expect a man / woman to ask first. - as per club rules. I'm an old school swinger. Sorry if some don't like that. I won't fuck everyone.

just most

. I do have standards and prefrances. I practice safe sex and reg tested. - passed everytime.

I'm more than happy to share out my fella in clubs/ meets ect. I wish more fems would share out theirs, or themself.

Sorry if I come across crude or rude. But we're swingers and players. Life is too short.

(Fem)

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Wow, I really didn't mean to cause such a fuss!

Just to clarify what I meant here, I'm not saying for a moment that I think being in a club is any kind of license to grope anybody you like! My lack of clarity means my main point was missed, which is a shame.

OBVIOUSLY I wasn't talking about my first interaction with people being to just immediately try and feel them up! It's often clear whether attention is wanted from the conversation you have with people when entering the room or the tub etc, people might flirt with you or otherwise make it seem that they would welcome some physical contact.

I entirely understand different people have different boundaries and feelings about what is okay and what isn't in the club, and my point was simply that whilst back in the day many people would seemingly be there to play and have some fun, that seems to be the case less and less now...

So again, I apologise if I wasn't clear - it's obvious that many people thought I was saying something I was not and if I could edit the first post to make my point clearer then I absolutely would do.

I hope that clears things up a bit!

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"For example, 18 months ago, 9/10 times I would get in the hot tub at a club and if I liked the guy/gal on either side of me I'd waste no time putting my hands on their upper thighs"

Glad to hear that people are not accepting that kind of behaviour any more.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe if people made more of an effort outside the play areas, maybe if more people made there intentions clear, maybe if the non swingers, the clique, the peacocks, the heavy drinkers, the non swappers, the no kissing or some other silly rules people just pissed off down the pub, us players could engage with each other, flirt and then if all up for it, have some fun.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

Personal opinion. I would think a touch on a thigh is acceptable as an opening move to someone you have been chatting to. We would prefer that to an explicit request. It you are on the receiving end of a touch like that and aren't interested, can't you just say that?

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman over a year ago

stourbridge area

Times have changed ... yes you must seek verbal consent ... groping with out consent is not acceptable

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"So because you like doing it and are horny at the time it makes it perfectly ok to just lay hands on someone? I think not. If someone, male or female just decided to touch me in the anticipation it would lead to more it would end up in a swift kick to the balls/vag.

Just because people are swingers doesn’t mean they will fuck anything and that you will be their type

Mrs"

A truly delightful attitude .

No one said anyone would fuck anyone .

For some of us there is more to it than establishing a type as you put it . It’s about the scenario as much as the person .

Quite why you feel the need to threaten violence is way beyond me

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"Personal opinion. I would think a touch on a thigh is acceptable as an opening move to someone you have been chatting to. We would prefer that to an explicit request. It you are on the receiving end of a touch like that and aren't interested, can't you just say that? "

Absolutely

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By *eavenscentitCouple over a year ago

barnstaple

"Really I'm keen to know how many other "naughty" girls like me are out there (me) ... I *want* guys to try their luck and touch me, it turns me on to see the guys talking to me accidentally letting their raging hardons slip above the water haha (yes please) Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers??? (yes, we are old school erotic) "

I expect you go as part of a couple

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I wouldn't touch someone on their thigh but I've had people do that to me and I've just said no thank you if I wasn't interested.

I think it depends on the situation. If they hadn't said a word to me or made any eye contact first, I'd be annoyed but I wouldn't punch them!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe if people made more of an effort outside the play areas, maybe if more people made there intentions clear, maybe if the non swingers, the clique, the peacocks, the heavy drinkers, the non swappers, the no kissing or some other silly rules people just pissed off down the pub, us players could engage with each other, flirt and then if all up for it, have some fun. "

Wouldn't that be great! And in a lot of more established clubs that's still exactly how it is.

Unfortunately on here the majority of opposers to the OP probably don't go to clubs, they are just spouting how they think they should run.

And I. An assure you should you speak to the owner or manager of any of the clubs we go to and ask if they would ban somebody for touching somebodies thigh in a hot tub and immediately stopping to any sort of negative response they would burst out laughing.

They do monitor these threads doing exactly that

but how could they join in and comment with so many people desperate to be offended and outraged at all the physical assault going on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wow, I really didn't mean to cause such a fuss!

I hope that clears things up a bit!"

It's still been an interesting discussion though.

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By *iker boy 69Man over a year ago

midlands

So what is it, am I weird ??? Are there more of you out there who just love the naughtiness of sex with strangers???"

Let me know what clubs you go to. Wouldnt need to be stroked before i was showing above the water if you were next to me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"See this is what puts me off clubs.

Being touched up by an attractive woman?

Attractive isn’t perceived the same by everyone.

Personally, I don’t go to clubs for women, I go for men. If he has a partner I find attractive I may be interested in her too. There are universal attractive traits which the lady in the OP appears to have though."

Not everyone is attracted to classic looks. Me for one. I like women but I’m not keen on femininity. I like ‘tom boys’ if I’m pushed to describe a type. It’s more about the person with women for me.

I have a much more definitive idea of the male physique I like.

Stunningly ‘pretty’ women I avoid.

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"See this is what puts me off clubs.

Being touched up by an attractive woman?

Attractive isn’t perceived the same by everyone.

I have a much more definitive idea of the male physique I like.

Stunningly ‘pretty’ women I avoid. "
Obviously be exceptions to the rule but a very small percentage in this case I would think.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Umm, you don’t just go touching another person without permission. How you havn’t been knocked out by now is a mystery! Always ask before you touch anyone on any part of their body!!

H x"

I touch people all the time, mainly non-swingers. I’m a tactile person. As yet I have never been threatened with violence,nor threatened with sexual harassment suits at work. . I think you are deliberately misunderstanding that many on here are talking about a simple touch on a forearm or a leg as a non-verbal way of asking if the other party is interested. Which is a shame, because there is a huge difference between a light touch as described above and grabbing or groping. Conflating the two does no favours to anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Umm, you don’t just go touching another person without permission. How you havn’t been knocked out by now is a mystery! Always ask before you touch anyone on any part of their body!!

H x

But how can you get all self righteous and offended if you don't massively change the obvious meaning of people's posts!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers.....

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

I haven't counted the different opinions but there seem to be many varying thoughts of lots of opinions and thoughts. As I've said earlier I've had quite direct approaches, people taking hold of my cock, taking in their mouth and the like. I've always either just allowed it or encouraged it or said no thanks. No problem to me, but evidently there are more snsitive souls out there. Personally I would never grope someones breast, fanny or cock. However I see nothing wrong with human contact, a slight stroke or touch to the thigh? We aren't supposed to be having a night at the chapel.

When hosting gang bangs I always spoke to the woman / T-Girl before to say I would start the action by sitting or standing next to them. I would then first start by by stroking and caressing before moving onto more intimate contact on a gradual way. Sometimes if that wasn't done people would talk about the weather or whatever without anything happening. Sadly a lot of the posts on this thread have made me think do I want to visit clubs? I've wanted to go to one in Bolton for a while and a while ago I went to a new one in Blackpool and liked it. However I now wonder how oe would go about getting to play with others.

I'm glad I'm not a teenager starting out dating these days, virginity would be difficult to lose in the modern world

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers....."

If a person goes to the pub and chats with people who go fishing , but doesn’t go fishing , is he a fisherman ?

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"I haven't counted the different opinions but there seem to be many varying thoughts of lots of opinions and thoughts. As I've said earlier I've had quite direct approaches, people taking hold of my cock, taking in their mouth and the like. I've always either just allowed it or encouraged it or said no thanks. No problem to me, but evidently there are more snsitive souls out there. Personally I would never grope someones breast, fanny or cock. However I see nothing wrong with human contact, a slight stroke or touch to the thigh? We aren't supposed to be having a night at the chapel.

I'm glad I'm not a teenager starting out dating these days, virginity would be difficult to lose in the modern world

If the people posting on this thread who threaten violence if anyone touches them without asking first are anything to go by , I’m glad we stopped going to clubs a few years ago .

And I don’t blame you for wondering whether it’s worth it or not . But as some posters have said , the reality is probably nothing like as dark as it’s painted by some .

Let’s put it this way , if there are half a dozen naked swingers in a hot tub , and a woman touches someone in there , it’s very unlikely that the recipient is going to punch or kick her . Most would reciprocate , some would move away , and some may say no thanks , but I really don’t believe anyone would be violent . Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part .

I have memories of times in jacuzzis when we played with people we wouldn’t normally play with simply because it just felt right at the time . And every time it was after an advance made by the female of a couple , and every time there was no mention of consent . I also recall many a time my wife saying no thanks to guys who tried their luck . No problem at all , and she would have been disappointed if no one tried .

Like you , I feel for those looking to lose their virginity . Perhaps there’s a downloadable consent form online somewhere , just so people can sleep assured at night .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can I just point out despite what Mr marmite says I would not knock anyone out that's not me. I can't say I would appreciate being touched without being asked or inviting someone though. I've always been led to believe etiquette is to get approval

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

Like you , I feel for those looking to lose their virginity . Perhaps there’s a downloadable consent form online somewhere , just so people can sleep assured at night ."

Spare of the moment is good, just happening usually really better than planned.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The whole thing about "seeking verbal consent", to me that just feels faintly ridiculous if I've just been giving someone the eye for the past 15 seconds, or got a smile back from a flirty comment I just made... sure, there might be times I judge it wrong - both now and in the past - but on those occasions I've never once been "kicked in the vag" or been punched in the face as some have suggested would be an appropriate response... people simply politely declined and the night moved on, no drama seen or necessary... I guess there are some who don't agree with me, but I personally think a quick squeeze of somebodies thigh is acceptable, particularly if its in response to signals I've already interpreted.

Some people comment that just because people are swingers it doesn't mean they will fuck anyone... or that I'll be there type. Of course! And sometimes its clear that no attention is wanted right away, and I would respect that. Of course there are people I too might not be interested in playing with... I wouldn't lose my shit if their way of asking me was to give my leg a little stroke whilst they were chatting to me.

I feel as if the swinging scene is getting more and more like the fetish one... lots of people thinking they are making some kind of statement just by being there, or making the point of their night to try look either as "fantastic" or outrageous as possible, with less and less people there because they simply want to have intimate fun with other consenting adults. Bring back the dirty girls I say.. gang bangs for everyone

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

I've finally looked at your profile and photos, I thought I'd better let you know that you're welcome to 'interfere' with me at any time

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I'm thinking we pick a date for all us slutty swingers to meet at Quest in Leeds ... what a party that would be !

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

"I'm thinking we pick a date for all us slutty swingers to meet at Quest in Leeds ... what a party that would be !"

Never been there, most of my stuff has been NW based but now you've got electricity and running water Leed sounds like fun. Especially if your attitudes towards swinging are more the norm

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers.....

If a person goes to the pub and chats with people who go fishing , but doesn’t go fishing , is he a fisherman ? "

Honestly I’m just here for the sex... the less socializing the better....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm with you after reading this thread and with me being a lone woman going to clubs on my own. If there were a chance of anyone touching me in close proximity - hot tubs. I would just avoid the area....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream..."

Sums it up completely.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream..."
omg swinging is becoming 'vanilla'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream...omg swinging is becoming 'vanilla'"

Beyond vanilla...... it has gone from people going out to have wild kinky sex to people going out just to go out.

There was a thread recently about.... would you be happy if you went to a club and didn’t play...

The amount of people that said yes was amazing.... I was truly shocked

Click on my green arrow if you want a good read....

It will give you incite on this brave new world of swinging....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream...omg swinging is becoming 'vanilla'

Beyond vanilla...... it has gone from people going out to have wild kinky sex to people going out just to go out.

There was a thread recently about.... would you be happy if you went to a club and didn’t play...

The amount of people that said yes was amazing.... I was truly shocked

Click on my green arrow if you want a good read....

It will give you incite on this brave new world of swinging...."
yes I saw that thread and it amazed me to clubs can be very expensive, they must have money to burn is all I'd say

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This is one reason why I stay clear of hot tubs ! "

Me too! Along with the hygiene aspect

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By *entadreadMan over a year ago

Essex

"From now on bring a written consent form in the hot tub.....

Just ask everyone to sign it before you touch them....

Just make sure to keep the pen behind your ear so it doesn’t get wet...."

What happened to talking? If you fancy someone, talk to them, or ask them whether they would want to progress things beyond the tub or in the tub. What's the obsession with touching legs, and knees? Its like these body parts are litmus papers...you lose nothing, (well apart from an erection if they say no) if you engage in conversations. This is obvious party etiquette.

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By *entadreadMan over a year ago

Essex

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers.....

If a person goes to the pub and chats with people who go fishing , but doesn’t go fishing , is he a fisherman ?

Honestly I’m just here for the sex... the less socializing the better...."
But one leads to the other, no?

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By *ynecplCouple over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

We only play with those we have chatted to and would never dream of touching somebody without asking first. If somebody touch either of us without asking they would be informed to move there hand immediately and not do it again.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But that’s “their rules” silly or not to you it’s their preference and respect should always be given to others preferences, regardless of your own.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But that’s “their rules” silly or not to you it’s their preference and respect should always be given to others preferences, regardless of your own. "

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By *rReyMan over a year ago

Fleet

"See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue. "

This

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"See this is what puts me off clubs. I am terrible at reading signals in the real world so in a club, I wouldn't have a clue.

This

Same here.

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By *litheroevoyeurMan over a year ago

Clitheroe

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers.....

If a person goes to the pub and chats with people who go fishing , but doesn’t go fishing , is he a fisherman ? "

Brilliant analogy, some of these posts make me ask are these people actually swingers or is it just every so trendy to think they are?

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By *etro1940sCouple over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

Thanks for being a voice for reason and sensible sensuality. We would all benefit from steering away from either the "no touch" rule and any free for all zero consent seeking attitude. Erotic is very much often spontaneous and surprising .... respect and good communications a lover's skill

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

But some people just enjoy the social aspects of swinging... Surely they are still swingers.....

If a person goes to the pub and chats with people who go fishing , but doesn’t go fishing , is he a fisherman ? "

Depends if the other fisherman fuck his wife or not

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By * Town CoupleCouple over a year ago

walsall

We do agree that in recent visits to clubs it just seems that it’s mainly a mixture of .... people using it as a social club and never leave the bar all night, ‘the beautiful’ show offs saying look at me but not ever playing and seemingly inexperienced swingers who just want to play with each other and watch everyone else

Male half has been attending clubs on and off over 12 years and back then there seemed to be far more spontaneous play which was often encouraged and propagated by merely a smile or a look between the 2 parties and I don’t find that now

Our fem better half is quite shy in clubs and likes others to make the first move so it is one of the reasons we’re not as fussed about clubs now

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"We do agree that in recent visits to clubs it just seems that it’s mainly a mixture of .... people using it as a social club and never leave the bar all night, ‘the beautiful’ show offs saying look at me but not ever playing and seemingly inexperienced swingers who just want to play with each other and watch everyone else

Our fem better half is quite shy in clubs and likes others to make the first move so it is one of the reasons we’re not as fussed about clubs now

Same here , and when the female is waiting for people to make the first move and they don’t through fear of a kick in the bollocks , it’s a crazy situation really .

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By * Town CoupleCouple over a year ago

walsall

Our fem better half is quite shy in clubs and likes others to make the first move so it is one of the reasons we’re not as fussed about clubs now

Same here , and when the female is waiting for people to make the first move and they don’t through fear of a kick in the bollocks , it’s a crazy situation really ."

The militancy and aggression shown by some on here is quite shocking

A gentle encouraging touch is a whole lot different to randomly being grabbed by the pussy

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

Our fem better half is quite shy in clubs and likes others to make the first move so it is one of the reasons we’re not as fussed about clubs now

Same here , and when the female is waiting for people to make the first move and they don’t through fear of a kick in the bollocks , it’s a crazy situation really .

The militancy and aggression shown by some on here is quite shocking

A gentle encouraging touch is a whole lot different to randomly being grabbed by the pussy

Exactly , and this is the point that we and the op have made .

I honestly think the reality is very different to what some of the more aggressive types have said .

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By *etLikeMan over a year ago

most fundamental aspects

I initially read this thread yesterday but decided not to contribute, after I was fairly roundly condemned on a previous thread, for having the audacity to suggest, that kissing whilst still in a play room, post play was not unreasonable. It like this, is about context.

I’m terrible at “reading the signs” as to whether someone is into me *before* play begins, and I will err on the side of caution, meaning that I’ve likely missed out on countless opportunities. I can tell if the optics are there once there is an ice breaker. This is rarely just from conversation and a tactile advance is just one sign that someone wants to play.

When I originally read the thread, I visualised the scenario by the OP and knew exactly what was meant. I have been a solo and part of a couple in hot tubs where people have tried to initiate play. It was never someone just diving straight into contact. Conversation, laughter, mirroring of gestures, squidging up closer, were all precursors to physical contact. Sometimes this has resulted in progression to a play room and sometimes it hasn’t.

Consent and free will are incredibly important. A few have inadvertently highlighted something just as important: Context. The latter is not some kind of excuse for lack of consent but it is incredibly important.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But that’s “their rules” silly or not to you it’s their preference and respect should always be given to others preferences, regardless of your own. "

Yes!

Everyone has to start somewhere. I think it's daunting enough walking into a club on your own, even worse if everyone expects you to play or you get an unwanted hand on your thigh in the hot tub.

I started off just attending my local club socially last year. Thankfully everyone was really welcoming. I was asked to play on the first couple of visits and politely declined (as they weren't my type). As I've gained a bit more confidence I've progressed onto MMF play, MFF, foursomes and moresomes! However, I've been to heavy play events and no one's caught my eye. Not the end of the world, I still had a great evening. I wouldn't consider myself any less of a swinger

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By *dam and slutCouple over a year ago

Manchester

There's a change, shift in attitude globally and I believe it's a result of the "me too" campaign. Unsolicited attention is now frowned upon, CONSENT is the new buzzword, although it's always been my buzzword. You now have to roll with the punches, if attitudes change then actions have to follow. If you touched me without asking I would smash you in the face, I know (my bad) but my body, my choice. The fact people have let you get away with this behaviour is just mind blowing to me as the change in attitude is to you.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"There's a change, shift in attitude globally and I believe it's a result of the "me too" campaign. Unsolicited attention is now frowned upon, CONSENT is the new buzzword, although it's always been my buzzword. You now have to roll with the punches, if attitudes change then actions have to follow. If you touched me without asking I would smash you in the face, I know (my bad) but my body, my choice. The fact people have let you get away with this behaviour is just mind blowing to me as the change in attitude is to you. "

Every swinging club I ever went to had a "no touch without asking" policy. I started going in 2011 and I doubt the rules were new that year.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would you ask consent before making contact with your fist to their face?

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

Would you ask consent before making contact with your fist to their face?"

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

I am all for a no tolerance policy for the men (and it is almost always men) who grab random bits of women with whom they haven't exchanged a word. But what we are talking here is people having a chat, appearing to fancy each other and one making the initial move with a hand on a thigh or some such.

Whilst such behaviour would be completely inappropriate in most places, this is a sex club, where, one can assume, that people are there to have sex and hence are open to sexual advances with people whom it might reasonably be assumed they fancy.

Obviously, we all misread signals sometimes, but why is it so difficult for the person being touched to say something like. "sorry I'm not feeling it at the moment, maybe later".

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I should just stop going to clubs like we had to in the end. An incident for us was the final straw with some horrible, disrespectful people really upsetting us. Shame really as we used to quite enjoy it in the early days.

My most vivid memory was of a gorgeous woman joining us on the big bed. I was having a little fun with Mrs N. She said in an earthy, sexy voice. "Phoawwwww do you mind if I give those boobs a feel". How polite was that

. "Of course you can", Mrs N replied.

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"I am all for a no tolerance policy for the men (and it is almost always men) who grab random bits of women with whom they haven't exchanged a word. But what we are talking here is people having a chat, appearing to fancy each other and one making the initial move with a hand on a thigh or some such.

Obviously, we all misread signals sometimes, but why is it so difficult for the person being touched to say something like. "sorry I'm not feeling it at the moment, maybe later".

Why bother with such pleasantries when you can just smash their face in ?

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

Obviously, we all misread signals sometimes, but why is it so difficult for the person being touched to say something like. "sorry I'm not feeling it at the moment, maybe later".

Absolutely spot on. It’s called context.

Nobody’s grabbing anyone in the scenario of the OP, it’s called flirting.

All this ‘you touch me I punch you’ !!!

What are you classing as a touch ? So if someone’s thigh gently brushed against yours without asking in the hot tube you would ‘smash them in the face’. ?

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By *orthwest_cplCouple over a year ago

Stretford

I don't know what clubs some of you go to where fights are likely to break out at any minute.

We've been going to clubs very regularly for nearly 20 years. We've been to over 40 clubs here and abroad - we've never seen any trouble at any of them. We have seen many people touch gently - as the OP is suggesting - and the worst that has happened has been a "No thanks".

It beggars belief that so many people on this thread are prepared to act aggressively when a word would be sufficient and that they seem not to see a difference between a light, tentative touch on a non-sexual part of the body and a full on grope.

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"I don't know what clubs some of you go to where fights are likely to break out at any minute.

So many people on these forums don’t really read the thread before commenting . It doesn’t take much for some folk to get all hot under the collar , and before you know it , they want the world and his wife to know how hard they are ! A truly sad reflection of society , but especially sad when you consider that we already face the wrath of those who promote a monogamous lifestyle .

But there it is , and like you guys , we went to clubs hundreds of times and never saw a fight or raised fists . Plenty of gentle touching , especially in jacuzzis , plenty of polite no thanks , and never any violence .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say we are totally with the op on this one .

When swinging clubs became more like social clubs we stopped going , and that was a few years ago now .

Yes, thats how things were in the main a few years back. The scene has very much changed and not for the better in many respects, theres a lot of people around now who reallly cant be described as swingers as such. Not sure how you would describe some of them, but they certainly are not sociable, friendly or openminded and very much out of 'keeping' with what things should be all about.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well said.

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By *dam and slutCouple over a year ago

Manchester

You mean something like " Excuse me I am going to smash you in the face because you are a pervert who hasn't spoken to me and yet your unwanted thumb is in my ass"

Yeah I do that all the time.

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By *dam and slutCouple over a year ago

Manchester

I know what accidental is, but that wasn't what the OP was talking about but yeah my bad. This is my last post ever. Written by xslutx, ( which I should have put on the other posts in this thread aswell, joys of a couple profile.).

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

"I know what accidental is, but that wasn't what the OP was talking about but yeah my bad. This is my last post ever. Written by xslutx, ( which I should have put on the other posts in this thread aswell, joys of a couple profile.). "

The OP made it quite clear what type of contact she was talking about. Here’s her quote.

“OBVIOUSLY I wasn't talking about my first interaction with people being to just immediately try and feel them up! It's often clear whether attention is wanted from the conversation ...,,,”

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By *etro1940sCouple over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

"I don't know what clubs some of you go to where fights are likely to break out at any minute.

Respectful, restrained and responsible take on a subject that just does not seem to arise in the club we frequent in Madrid. A look, a smile, a gentle touch or a hand on the shoulder is an invitation - getting aggressive is as contrarian as being guilty or ashamed in this space. Come to play, to look and to experience. Don't come to argue.

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By *dam and slutCouple over a year ago

Manchester

In the Original Question, she said "If I like someone, I waste no time.". So sorry I wasn't bothered to read further. So I am naughty slut who is going to get spanked because while I was at work you all jumped on my partner thinking he was the violent one, does your attitude towards my threatening behaviour change when you know I am a 5 ft Woman rather than a six foot man ? And OBVIOUSLY in caps but AGAIN THAT ISN'T IN THE OP. ??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have given me hope with your post.....

It seems there have become 2 separate camps in the swinging scene....

The first camp wants to go out for a night of adventure.... this will always end in sex...

The second camp wants to go out for a night of fun with no expectations of having sex...

10 years ago the first camp was more prevalent on the scene....

Now the second camp seems to be the norm....

The genesis of this is swinging becoming more mainstream...omg swinging is becoming 'vanilla'

Beyond vanilla...... it has gone from people going out to have wild kinky sex to people going out just to go out.

There was a thread recently about.... would you be happy if you went to a club and didn’t play...

The amount of people that said yes was amazing.... I was truly shocked

Click on my green arrow if you want a good read....

It will give you incite on this brave new world of swinging...."

When I'm paying good money to travel and the entrance - believe me I'm definitely at a club for sex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Seems a lot of prudish replies ...quite amusing.

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By *he incognito twoCouple over a year ago

near you

There are some really prudish people who seem to be attending clubs ,for gods sake its not the local Bible reading class your attending its a swingers club, all the actions what the original OP described would have been very acceptable to us and like others have said if we were not interested it would have been a polite sorry we are not interested at witch point i am sure the OP would have said sorry and moved on all these statements saying this would get you banned ...if you done that you would have had a right hook.....jeeees take a chill pill and unless we are to open minded we half expect that to happen in hot tub

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I haven’t read all the reply’s but as a regular club user usually with my wife as a couple and been using clubs for 12 years it’s always been known you ask first being in a club doesn’t mean you can touch. I also now help out in a club and if it was brought to the staff attention that someone was touching without asking they would have a warning a 2nd time they would be asked to leave male or female. I’ve seen females touching without asking and haven’t liked it when they’ve been told to ask and they are normally the first ones to kick up a fuss if they get touched without asking. A swingers club isn’t just for people who want sex from strangers it’s for people who like to watch, be watched, who are vanilla but like the club atmosphere. If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I haven’t read all the reply’s but as a regular club user usually with my wife as a couple and been using clubs for 12 years it’s always been known you ask first being in a club doesn’t mean you can touch. I also now help out in a club and if it was brought to the staff attention that someone was touching without asking they would have a warning a 2nd time they would be asked to leave male or female. I’ve seen females touching without asking and haven’t liked it when they’ve been told to ask and they are normally the first ones to kick up a fuss if they get touched without asking. A swingers club isn’t just for people who want sex from strangers it’s for people who like to watch, be watched, who are vanilla but like the club atmosphere. If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask. "

YES!

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By *ames1763Man over a year ago

Aberdeen

Yeah, you are not weird but you see most people are into the lifestyle for different reasons, some ladies are there looking for relationships, they were not successful in holding any kind of vanilla relationship so they moved into the lifestyle to achieve this, because the lifestyle for some reason on an average has a very high percentage of quality guys so I think in my opinion that is what it is.

There is nothing wrong with this to be honest, I think the lifestyle is big enough to safely accommodate different desires, it definitely accommodated mine .

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

I think this all needs to be put in context and explained.

A stranger - man or woman jumps into the hot tub/ jacuzzi and just starts to grab anyone’s cock/tits/ pussy/ ass.

NO NO NO NO

2. Group of people standing/sitting next to each other. All Talking, flirting, making eye contact, a smile, playing footsie with each other. Giving off quite clear signals

The gentle place of a hand on an arm or leg or even caress of a bottom by one of the group on another of the group. Which if accepted by the receiver can move to other areas

YES.

Because by being part of that ‘group ‘ you are implying that’s what you want to do. The person being touched may not even know who is exactly touching them but is happy because it’s part of the ‘group’. It’s part of the dynamics.

If At any stage a person wants to stop they just remove the hand/s, leave the group or a simple ‘ no thanks’.

If someone new wants to join in with the ‘group ‘ they should ask permission before participating. If they get s ‘no’ then sorry try don’t join in.

Or if you don’t like that kind of play you don’t try to join that ‘group’ but seek people who match your likes.

As stated. It’s about context.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask. "

That's an absurd analogy! Would you ask a stranger in a pub if they fancied a fuck in full view of the rest of the punters?

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

" If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask.

That's an absurd analogy! Would you ask a stranger in a pub if they fancied a fuck in full view of the rest of the punters?"
Oh that is the advice given to single men, just treat it like a pub. If anybody knows any pubs like this please let me know and save my entrance fee

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't think you're weird at all as when I get in THAT frame of mind I can be rather slutty (as in multiple partners rather than any woman there, I do still have standards lol)

The difference is in my approach. I'm a self-confessed social butterfly (gobshite) who loves chatting to people both already known and not met before as I'm a naturally curious person? So breaking ice chatting whilst fully clothed comes naturally to me really.

The difference being that apart from the times I've entered a hot tub with a lady where we were already "acquainted properly"

I can think of only one occasion in a hot tub where a lady I'd not met or spoken to before brushed past me and gave me a lovely huge smile, waited till it was returned in similar fashion, then brushed deliberately against me again to gauge my reaction that led to play?

It's not just the hot tub either, I never touch anyone in playrooms, in fact I don't even verbally suggest playing of any kind to any woman anywhere in the club even if we've been chatting a while and really getting on or flirting as I know full well in some circumstances that it may put her on edge as well as would spoil what is a lovely conversation?

Yet I've still played on all but one visit to a club (the odd one out being a night where none of the perhaps two dozen people there played at all whilst I was there as it just wasn't THAT kind of night at all, the atmosphere was more like a social, but with my prediliction to being a chatterbox it was still fun! Ironically I did get asked to play when I was heading out of the door by a woman I'd chatted to, but I needed to collect my daughter by that time so I merely had to politely decline) as usually a lady I find attractive will directly ask me if I want to?

I'm aware that this will rule a lot of shyer ladies out of playing with me whatsoever (though they usually find it easier if they're chatting with me along with another lady where the presence of another woman helps calm their nerves or the more forward of the two can speak for her and suggest both of them get involved), but if you don't ask you don't get really and a lady asking a man isn't putting him under any pressure at all (and the worst he can do is say "No" and not in an offended way unless he's a moron) whereas a man asking a lady may make her feel uncomfortable?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think this all needs to be put in context and explained.

A stranger - man or woman jumps into the hot tub/ jacuzzi and just starts to grab anyone’s cock/tits/ pussy/ ass.

NO NO NO NO

2. Group of people standing/sitting next to each other. All Talking, flirting, making eye contact, a smile, playing footsie with each other. Giving off quite clear signals

The gentle place of a hand on an arm or leg or even caress of a bottom by one of the group on another of the group. Which if accepted by the receiver can move to other areas

YES.

If At any stage a person wants to stop they just remove the hand/s, leave the group or a simple ‘ no thanks’.

If someone new wants to join in with the ‘group ‘ they should ask permission before participating. If they get s ‘no’ then sorry try don’t join in.

Or if you don’t like that kind of play you don’t try to join that ‘group’ but seek people who match your likes.

As stated. It’s about context.

Very much agree.

I think people are just thinking of stories or actual times when they were groped without any form of consent. A hand on the inside thigh... or worse.

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By *he incognito twoCouple over a year ago

near you

[Removed by poster at 03/11/18 11:25:09]

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By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

"If you would have done what you said in the hot run to Mrs marmite she would more than likely knock you out!

Oh, extreme violence when a polite “no thank you” would do.

Classy.

Oh, sexual assault when a polite "can I touch you" would do.

Classy.

It's sleezy shit like this that puts people off going to clubs. No one has the right to touch anyone without consent. Vile behaviour

So probably better to arrange stuff in advance. GBs, parties, meets where you all know it's pretty surely going to happen?

In the Village a lot of meets have been purely instigated by a glance. You just take it as meaning that someone is wanting to suck a cock, be fucked etc.

Happy to be open minded regarding names.

Mike X

You obviously didn’t mind that and good for you.

That’s not to say every single person you meet is going to be the same.

This talk of “spontaneity” is rubbish, you can easily say “Can I” and they give you a nod and it still be spontaneous, there is absolutely no need to be touching people without their consent.

If a man/woman you had zero attraction to had touched you without your consent in the way that woman did, you’d have most likely had more of an issue with it, which says it all.

It is not too hard to quickly ask, it also saves a lot of trouble."

Spot on.

If a "random" just touched either of us, we'd be pretty narked, it takes a brief moment to make eye contact and say "Is it ok to touch?".

It's different if you have been chatting, having a giggle, and getting to know someone, and then hands wander, by then it's obvious you are all getting on and the chemistry is right.

We would be mortified if we touched someone and they got freaked out, so we either wait to be asked, or we just ask for ourselves.

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By *he incognito twoCouple over a year ago

near you

"I think this all needs to be put in context and explained.

A stranger - man or woman jumps into the hot tub/ jacuzzi and just starts to grab anyone’s cock/tits/ pussy/ ass.

NO NO NO NO

2. Group of people standing/sitting next to each other. All Talking, flirting, making eye contact, a smile, playing footsie with each other. Giving off quite clear signals

The gentle place of a hand on an arm or leg or even caress of a bottom by one of the group on another of the group. Which if accepted by the receiver can move to other areas

YES.

If At any stage a person wants to stop they just remove the hand/s, leave the group or a simple ‘ no thanks’.

If someone new wants to join in with the ‘group ‘ they should ask permission before participating. If they get s ‘no’ then sorry try don’t join in.

Or if you don’t like that kind of play you don’t try to join that ‘group’ but seek people who match your likes.

As stated. It’s about context.

Very much agree.

I think people are just thinking of stories or actual times when they were groped without any form of consent. A hand on the inside thigh... or worse."

Very well balanced reply and in perspective

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By *an_WoodMan over a year ago

Stafford

Context is everything. I go to a swinger club expecting displays of sexuality even as on occasion I am not invited to join in. As a single male I am very aware of not giving offence. My favourite memory is a woman grabbing my cock and leading me away for her use. Unexpected yes. Delightful undoubtedly. If earlier at the bar she had grabbed me I would protested but in the play area a tremendous experience. The situation is everything. To be honest at work I get more unpleasant interactions with people touching my arms and once my head as if I am petting panda in a zoo !

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"Context is everything. I go to a swinger club expecting displays of sexuality even as on occasion I am not invited to join in. As a single male I am very aware of not giving offence. My favourite memory is a woman grabbing my cock and leading me away for her use. Unexpected yes. Delightful undoubtedly. If earlier at the bar she had grabbed me I would protested but in the play area a tremendous experience. The situation is everything. To be honest at work I get more unpleasant interactions with people touching my arms and once my head as if I am petting panda in a zoo !"

Exactly

And context is what people who threaten violence are ignoring .

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Exactly

And context is what people who threaten violence are ignoring ."
Had some guy touch my balls before. The fact he was letting me fuck his partner and no boundaries were discussed a bollocking was all that was required. Violence is a last resort.

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

Exactly

And context is what people who threaten violence are ignoring . Had some guy touch my balls before. The fact he was letting me fuck his partner and no boundaries were discussed a bollocking was all that was required. Violence is a last resort."

Do you complete a tick chart before playing? Did you discuss ALL possible boundaries with the woman you were ‘fucking’ before you played?

Of course without knowing the context in which your event happened it impossible to know how the bell touching occurred.

Maybe a ‘bollocking’ was needed or just a simple ‘ sorry that’s not for me’. I don’t know.

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Exactly

Do you complete a tick chart before playing? Did you discuss ALL possible boundaries with the woman you were ‘fucking’ before you played?

Of course without knowing the context in which your event happened it impossible to know how the bell touching occurred.

Maybe a ‘bollocking’ was needed or just a simple ‘ sorry that’s not for me’. I don’t know. "
No because sometimes you can just be watching and get a wave to join in. I didn't discuss because I didn't wanna kill the mood. I was younger and less experienced so partly to blame myself. Didn't realise how liberal some clubs were.

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By *ANDA2Couple over a year ago

Henley Arden

Exactly

Do you complete a tick chart before playing? Did you discuss ALL possible boundaries with the woman you were ‘fucking’ before you played?

Of course without knowing the context in which your event happened it impossible to know how the bell touching occurred.

Maybe a ‘bollocking’ was needed or just a simple ‘ sorry that’s not for me’. I don’t know. No because sometimes you can just be watching and get a wave to join in. I didn't discuss because I didn't wanna kill the mood. I was younger and less experienced so partly to blame myself. Didn't realise how liberal some clubs were. "

And that’s one of the big points‘ killing the mood’.

So all that is required is a simple ‘ no thank you’ and 99% of people will accept and stop that particular move. Then the play and fun just carries on. No ones offended no ones hurt just a boundary has been established.

Or everyone fills out a 1000 tick chart in triplicate before play.

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

[Removed by poster at 03/11/18 12:58:18]

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

Exactly

Do you complete a tick chart before playing? Did you discuss ALL possible boundaries with the woman you were ‘fucking’ before you played?

Of course without knowing the context in which your event happened it impossible to know how the bell touching occurred.

So the first ever club visit we had was an experience . The couple that invited us said that going into the couples room would be cool for us as we were new . This happened at Chams in Newport . So in we went , and there were two couples already playing . We started playing together not far from the others and soon they joined in . After a while one couple left leaving just us and the other couple . Anyway I am playing with the other lady , and I see my wife sucking the other guys cock , yet my cock is being sucked and I can see both women clearly and it couldn’t be one of them . So I’m up and out if there like a shot and the couple that invited us are pissing themselves laughting as they had watched it all happen and knew he was bi and I was straight .

I was proper homophobic back then but still didn’t even come close to wanting to hit anyone , not even the guy who thought it was so funny . It was a lesson learned , don’t go into a couples room on a bi night in a predominately gay club .

So let’s take it a stage further , if you visit a swingers club , get naked , get into a jacuzzi with loads of other naked swingers , don’t get upset if someone touches your thigh ! By all means say no thanks , but do you really think it warrants a smack in the mouth or a kick in the privates ? And tat question is open to all , including 5 foot tall women .

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By *hesexpeopleCouple over a year ago

s wales

It is definitely a contextual matter, when we first started going to clubs I was younger, less confident to speak up if I was unhappy about something and very nervous, me and Mr were in a swimming pool having sex when I felt a hand roughly rubbing my clit, I knew it wasn’t my partner and swiftly turned around to see a guy in his 60s doing it, Mr politely told him that wasn’t acceptable and we left the pool. However if we had been in the pool with people we have been chatting to, having a laugh with and somebody in the group had started stroking my leg in the pool I probably would have rather enjoyed it. It’s about feeling the vibe and interaction and judging the situation of what is acceptable accordingly.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm thinking we pick a date for all us slutty swingers to meet at Quest in Leeds ... what a party that would be !"

Lordy Lord. I would so love to be involved in that..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Thanks for being a voice for reason and sensible sensuality. We would all benefit from steering away from either the "no touch" rule and any free for all zero consent seeking attitude. Erotic is very much often spontaneous and surprising .... respect and good communications a lover's skill "

I love this post. May yet plagiarise it.

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By *dam and slutCouple over a year ago

Manchester

I appreciate context despite what others have said. Again the OP have the impression it WAS a cold start, it was NOT part of already existing interaction and it wasn't an accident. So answering that original question, yes I would hit out but in reality my resting bitch face means I do not get unwanted attention. Apparently the OP cleared this up later in the thread but I have yet to find it.

In all other contexts, i.e. accidental, pre-agreed, or a step up from flirting then I OBVIOUSLY wouldn't hit out.

xslutx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/11/18 14:13:20]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't know what clubs some of you go to where fights are likely to break out at any minute.

Weird isn't it, you must go to the same clubs as us. I've seen 3 guys over do it and 2 girls in 12 years. A lot less than an average night in revolution in a saturday

They must have some scrotty clubs somewhere for all the people who can't stand being touched but think violence is a good response that real club goers can't find.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bollocks you'd be banned for touching, groping yes, or not stopping touching after a polite no I agree.

What club is this then, I've worked in 3 and none would react like that.

And liking it to touching in a pub is beyond idiotic, most people don't go to a pub for a sexual experience, most going to a club are.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This is one reason why I stay clear of hot tubs ! "

This is one reason I stay clear of clubs. Much safer arranging a play meet on fab without the possibility of getting mixed signals and getting either thrown out, banned or accused of something worse.

I heard off too many 'faux' experiences of forums to feel relaxed in a club.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask.

That's an absurd analogy! Would you ask a stranger in a pub if they fancied a fuck in full view of the rest of the punters? Oh that is the advice given to single men, just treat it like a pub. If anybody knows any pubs like this please let me know and save my entrance fee

There are some bizarre clubs then, which one told you that, I have done iterally hundreds of club tours and I dread the thought of anybody treating it like a pub.

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

" If you were on a night out in a pub would you just randomly touch someone up? People are still in tiled to there own personal space in a swingers club. Be polite and ask.

There are some bizarre clubs then, which one told you that, I have done iterally hundreds of club tours and I dread the thought of anybody treating it like a pub. "
On a thread the other day called 'tips for approaching couples by singles'.

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