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Arrogance
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this.  |
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Anyone who uses the term real or genuine turns me off, i dont consider it arrogant but a sign they are unimaginative,and unimaginative sex is not what i am here for.
This partly comes from my BDSM side,that world is full of people who will tell you how,where and why you should be doing things.They tend to be the most boring people you will avoid at any cost.
However on here i have no problem with "arrogant" profiles.
Why? It makes the twunts easier to avoid  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Anyone who uses the term real or genuine turns me off, i dont consider it arrogant but a sign they are unimaginative,and unimaginative sex is not what i am here for.
This partly comes from my BDSM side,that world is full of people who will tell you how,where and why you should be doing things.They tend to be the most boring people you will avoid at any cost.
However on here i have no problem with "arrogant" profiles.
Why? It makes the twunts easier to avoid "
Nice way to look at it! 
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"Anyone who uses the term real or genuine turns me off, i dont consider it arrogant but a sign they are unimaginative,and unimaginative sex is not what i am here for.
This partly comes from my BDSM side,that world is full of people who will tell you how,where and why you should be doing things.They tend to be the most boring people you will avoid at any cost.
However on here i have no problem with "arrogant" profiles.
Why? It makes the twunts easier to avoid
Nice way to look at it!
"
Glass half full here
Seriously makes me giggle when u get ppl thinking one function on an internet site makes u swingers,kinky,wild,choose your label.
i have been having non nilla sex all my adult life,didnt know i was a swinger till 3 years ago,you tend to find that those most concerned about labels are the ones who think they have just reinvented the wheel. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Anyone who uses the term real or genuine turns me off, i dont consider it arrogant but a sign they are unimaginative,and unimaginative sex is not what i am here for.
This partly comes from my BDSM side,that world is full of people who will tell you how,where and why you should be doing things.They tend to be the most boring people you will avoid at any cost.
However on here i have no problem with "arrogant" profiles.
Why? It makes the twunts easier to avoid
Nice way to look at it!
Glass half full here
Seriously makes me giggle when u get ppl thinking one function on an internet site makes u swingers,kinky,wild,choose your label.
i have been having non nilla sex all my adult life,didnt know i was a swinger till 3 years ago,you tend to find that those most concerned about labels are the ones who think they have just reinvented the wheel."
I just simply take the bits I like. Some people feel it should be all or nothing! That's why I like the outer circles! |
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this. "
Yeah, a lot of profiles on here are way too arrogant. You get couple who wink at you and then you look at their profile and it says we do not see single guys, calling people fuckwits etc. To me that is someone who is way too tightly wound. I know sometimes people drive one to the wall but still....
As for the "real swingers". I don't even think it's necessary to make a comment.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
Im far too grounded to become arrogant over all the flattery and attention thats given on here,its laughable that some will let it go to their heads,I believe that some of the arrogant profiles on here are like red rags to a bull,you reep what you sow
As for experience equaling authority on how people should swing? well Im only concerned with how we swing and we have a great time,it may not be what "real" swingers agree with but do I care? nah im going to keep on having great times and meeting lovely people like we have since we joined
I do think that experience can equal giving good adice though,im sure we all have something that we can give back based on experiences |
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You saying that Im not really a supermodel and I shouldnt really enter Miss World next year? That men lie to me to get what they want? 
Next you will be saying there's no santa!
I really dont care if I dont like a profile. I just move on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd wager though those with "arrogant" profiles don't come on the forums whinging about lack if meets as their profile works for them separating the wheat from the chaff.
Be honest, if you read a profile that's vague in what they're looking for and have nice pics you'll contact them. If the profile reads "I go to the gym twice a day, three times on Sunday, I'm Angelina's body double and I'm hot to trot. Only those with bodies like Greek gods may approach me, absolutely no telly tubbies" you'd not dare to look at the pics, do the profile does its job! 
As for "real" swingers?!! Oh please!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I believe in positivity on a profile, if you want a particular type of person then write that. I don't think there's any need to call others' names or be rude about other users ie' the fuckwits, fatties, etc and a long list of do's and don't's puts me off.
I also believe in confidence and being truthful about what you feel you are. It irritates me that some people will put stuff like 'I don't think I'm pretty but others say I am' I think I'm big but others don't think I am, I've been told I'm a great lover but you'll have to decide'. These people believe the positive things about themselves but lack confidence to say so because they worry that others will think they have a huge ego.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't name call anyone on mine but I do have a list of don't wants, does that make me arrogant? I just thought bullet point type was an easier way than a paragraphs of waffle that no-one would read |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't name call anyone on mine but I do have a list of don't wants, does that make me arrogant? I just thought bullet point type was an easier way than a paragraphs of waffle that no-one would read "
One of the reasons I put "arrogant" in quotes. Some people lacking in self confidence see those that state what they want as arrogant.
There's no need to be rude and insult others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't name call anyone on mine but I do have a list of don't wants, does that make me arrogant? I just thought bullet point type was an easier way than a paragraphs of waffle that no-one would read
One of the reasons I put "arrogant" in quotes. Some people lacking in self confidence see those that state what they want as arrogant.
There's no need to be rude and insult others. "
No there isn't though maybe I shouldn't use the word cheaters? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this. "
Personally i think far to many people take this swinging lark to serious
Ive been doing this about 11 years now, does that make me an authority on swinging? does it heck, i still have no idea what im doing half the time, i still get nervous, pick the wrong people at times and the day i turn into a know it all and get everything right to the point i can tell others what to do would be the day i stop, because thats when the excitment will stop
There is a lot of arrogance in swinging, mainly women im sad to say, but also see it in male halfs of couples, i have seen some womens proiles who have a great big list of dos and dont and you must this, you must look like that, exeptional men only, must be good looking etc and most of these women the guys wouldnt give a second look at walking down the street, but on here they are in high demande and because they get so much attention all of a sudden they turn into americas next top model in their heads and start getting well above their stations and think they have the rights to be rude and demanding, and men who think because they have a mrs they have the rights to be rude to single guys
Im over weight, i have stretch marks and flabby bits and i always will, all because loads of men want to fuck me does not make me any better looking than i am, it just means theres isnt as many woman so men on here get less fussy, i actually dont find it a confidance boost as i know most of the guys dont mail me as an individual they just mailing me because im a woman but i think lots really do think all these men think they are gorgeous and start scting accordingly as it goes to their head |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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theres a fine line between confidence n arrogance. can usually tell the difference personally
i think its those who lack self-confidence that let it go to their heads tbh.
ur bubble gets burst sooner or later tho unless ur totally delusional |
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By *averiMan
over a year ago
Swindon to bristol |
"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this. "
Many of the what I would call 'arrogant' profiles on here often come from the most unattractive people. I guess its because in real life they get few compliaments and use sites like this as a confidance/ego booster. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im far too grounded to become arrogant over all the flattery and attention thats given on here,its laughable that some will let it go to their heads,I believe that some of the arrogant profiles on here are like red rags to a bull,you reep what you sow
As for experience equaling authority on how people should swing? well Im only concerned with how we swing and we have a great time,it may not be what "real" swingers agree with but do I care? nah im going to keep on having great times and meeting lovely people like we have since we joined
I do think that experience can equal giving good adice though,im sure we all have something that we can give back based on experiences"
Wise words. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think everyone has a degree of arrogance in their personality - I know I certainly do.
Some people, some comments, some situations, some experiences just bring that arrogance to the forefront more than others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this.
Personally i think far to many people take this swinging lark to serious
Ive been doing this about 11 years now, does that make me an authority on swinging? does it heck, i still have no idea what im doing half the time, i still get nervous, pick the wrong people at times and the day i turn into a know it all and get everything right to the point i can tell others what to do would be the day i stop, because thats when the excitment will stop
There is a lot of arrogance in swinging, mainly women im sad to say, but also see it in male halfs of couples, i have seen some womens proiles who have a great big list of dos and dont and you must this, you must look like that, exeptional men only, must be good looking etc and most of these women the guys wouldnt give a second look at walking down the street, but on here they are in high demande and because they get so much attention all of a sudden they turn into americas next top model in their heads and start getting well above their stations and think they have the rights to be rude and demanding, and men who think because they have a mrs they have the rights to be rude to single guys
Im over weight, i have stretch marks and flabby bits and i always will, all because loads of men want to fuck me does not make me any better looking than i am, it just means theres isnt as many woman so men on here get less fussy, i actually dont find it a confidance boost as i know most of the guys dont mail me as an individual they just mailing me because im a woman but i think lots really do think all these men think they are gorgeous and start scting accordingly as it goes to their head "
Good post. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You saying that Im not really a supermodel and I shouldnt really enter Miss World next year? That men lie to me to get what they want?
Next you will be saying there's no santa!
I really dont care if I dont like a profile. I just move on. "
santa is real he was in the grotto in Asda , lol I did get a good look so he will be popping in over xmas sorting your stocking out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't name call anyone on mine but I do have a list of don't wants, does that make me arrogant? I just thought bullet point type was an easier way than a paragraphs of waffle that no-one would read "
I don't always think a long list of do and do nots are essentially arrogan (some individual ones are)t, they just put me off. As I don't treat my profile as a be all and end all, it is literally just a starting point for me, I don't expect people to be categorised like a job spec.
I agree with personal preference, but when the profile says nothing about the person but solely states a list of do"s and don't's, then I take one look and don't bother reading. |
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this.
Personally i think far to many people take this swinging lark to serious
Ive been doing this about 11 years now, does that make me an authority on swinging? does it heck, i still have no idea what im doing half the time, i still get nervous, pick the wrong people at times and the day i turn into a know it all and get everything right to the point i can tell others what to do would be the day i stop, because thats when the excitment will stop
There is a lot of arrogance in swinging, mainly women im sad to say, but also see it in male halfs of couples, i have seen some womens proiles who have a great big list of dos and dont and you must this, you must look like that, exeptional men only, must be good looking etc and most of these women the guys wouldnt give a second look at walking down the street, but on here they are in high demande and because they get so much attention all of a sudden they turn into americas next top model in their heads and start getting well above their stations and think they have the rights to be rude and demanding, and men who think because they have a mrs they have the rights to be rude to single guys
Im over weight, i have stretch marks and flabby bits and i always will, all because loads of men want to fuck me does not make me any better looking than i am, it just means theres isnt as many woman so men on here get less fussy, i actually dont find it a confidance boost as i know most of the guys dont mail me as an individual they just mailing me because im a woman but i think lots really do think all these men think they are gorgeous and start scting accordingly as it goes to their head
Good post. "
this site summed up in one post |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this. "
various different questions here...
1) if I felt that a profile was arrogent then i wouldn't answer it.. simple as... it wouldn't be something that appealed to me in the first place... so it isn't really someone I would think about or lose sleep over...
if others answered them then maybe that say as much about the people who answer them, as it does about the people who put up the profiles in the first place...
2) no i don't think of myself as an authority on swinging... not as all...I do things my way, others do things theirs... doesn't mean either of us is right as there is no "right or wrong" way to swing... however... I do think of myself as quite an expert on "basic common sense"... which is an important part of what i use in my swinging... and I think that a lot of people lose that seems to go missing in the quest to get their leg over.....
3) the quickest was to get a lot of peoples backs up is the use of the terms "real/genuine swinger"... just because people may not do it the same way, doesn't mean they are any less real/genuine.... and i don't see why one set of people who use the site one way should look down on another group of who don't....
the site gives people all the tools to make it work... it's how people get it to work for them is the key....
3) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I worrie at times will thay like me .. I hope thay like me. But i can only be who i am and i do have them saying i look lovely and stuff i never did see myself like that and i dont let it go to my head as i know i am just Jo and on here we are all just one of a number like in chat rooms .. thay say it to everyone how sexy how lovely. Thers more to this swinging stuff then looks. I hope i am a nice person thats what i care about . jo xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Naughty Nymphos has summed up this site to a T but also bus wanker makes an excellent observation that we all display levels of arrogance.
On another thread where a guy noted that he didn't cum easily from oral sex, I knew from reading that opening post that it would gather comments from women saying 'I make every man cum'. If a guy started a thread about big breasts then you get lots of women trying to outdo others with size, fervently changing avatars to have breasts on show for that one thread, of course everyonr has amazing sex skills, we all eat out at the best restaurants, we all have wardrobes full of designer clothes, oh and don't we all get 100s of messages a day - I average about 4852 messages from guys every single day you know.
Its all a laugh isn't it, if you can't beat em join em |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I worrie at times will thay like me .. I hope thay like me. But i can only be who i am and i do have them saying i look lovely and stuff i never did see myself like that and i dont let it go to my head as i know i am just Jo and on here we are all just one of a number like in chat rooms .. thay say it to everyone how sexy how lovely. Thers more to this swinging stuff then looks. I hope i am a nice person thats what i care about . jo xxx"
Potential meet wise
I have no airs or graces about me. I am what you see in the pics and what you read in the messages.
Some people find me physically attractive, others don't - it is always nice to be seen as attractive but it isn't a necessity.
I am happy to pursue things with those that are interested and happy to drop things with those that aren't - and without any kickback or fall out.
Forum wise
I wouldn't say that I worried, but I do care what people think.
On just general chit chat threads, I fear at times I push my luck with some of the fly comments I make and just hope that they are received in the manner in which they were intended.
If they aren't, I would not hesitate to apologise.
On more serious threads, I do my best to sit them out if I can feel a fit of sarcasm coming on as there is a time and a place for it.
There are a couple of people who, because of the way they represent themselves on here, I couldn't give two hoots as to what they think of me - as I have little time for them
Does that make me arrogant ?
I don't think so, but others may feel differently |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I worrie at times will thay like me .. I hope thay like me. But i can only be who i am and i do have them saying i look lovely and stuff i never did see myself like that and i dont let it go to my head as i know i am just Jo and on here we are all just one of a number like in chat rooms .. thay say it to everyone how sexy how lovely. Thers more to this swinging stuff then looks. I hope i am a nice person thats what i care about . jo xxx"
See Jo I don't see you as arrogant whatsoever but I know you've been accused of it in the past.
I have absolutely no doubt you have lots of attention because everyone can see that you're an attractive and good looking lady.
You talk about aspects of your home life and holidays. I don't see anything wrong in that, you shouldn't be made to feel guilty about holidaying in the bahamas because you work for a living and its what you enjoy. Some people who are envious interpret it differently.
For me we are who we are, and we talk about aspects of that. Its when people start to put down others or make them feel inferior that I disagree with. And you Jo have never ever done that, you are simply honest and being you.
We've probably all been guilty of it at times though. Swinging does have a competitive edge to it.
I don't know anything about swinging and I'm not particularly talented at sex either. Before swinging I'd not had much experience. Like everyone there are parts of me which are great and parts not so good. Its best not to take it all too seriously |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Does that make me arrogant ?
I don't think so, but others may feel differently "
no it make you truthful and you come across very. We all have our likes on sites like this and what we are looking for .. just some have the need at times to put others down to make themselfs feel better not sure why and thats what makes some come across arrogant i feel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I worrie at times will thay like me .. I hope thay like me. But i can only be who i am and i do have them saying i look lovely and stuff i never did see myself like that and i dont let it go to my head as i know i am just Jo and on here we are all just one of a number like in chat rooms .. thay say it to everyone how sexy how lovely. Thers more to this swinging stuff then looks. I hope i am a nice person thats what i care about . jo xxx"
but do you not think that worry of if your liked adds to the excitment of a meet?
I do, every time i meet someone new i get the ....oh good what if.....what if i look better in the pics i sent and they dont like me in real life.....what if they see my stomach and run a mile lol what if..... but i just think that feeling keeps it alive, i wouldnt want to be so far up my own arse i knew everyone thinks i was great because then i think it would get boring, i also think being down to earth and a woman whos not demanding adds to the attraction to people
I personally do not think people on here are after super model type women, i honestly think they would sooner have a woman who is going to meet, who is down to earth, knows what she likes and how to please and just a normal every day person, not someone whos the picture of perfection with no personality and looks down their nose at everyone, and ive met a few guys like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I worrie at times will thay like me .. hope thay like me.
but do you not think that worry of if your liked adds to the excitment of a meet?
"
yes maybe it do keep it feeling alive with excitment having them feelings but i do worrie and get nurves on a first meets like you say its all part of what makes swinging works and when you click and meet after things get better and better at times .. one of my bi girlfiends i have known over 10 years and made some lovely friends who are on the same wavelength as me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I look on my profile as a bit of fun. It was space that needed filling and fill it I did. I don't really see the point of listing in lengthy detail the type of person I meet. I think before swinging I had a specific type of person I was attracted too, ie tall. Since swinging all that has changed. So I keep my profile fun and hope it attracts fun people...simple really. It may come across as arrogant to some and fun to others |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this. "
Think that there is often a fine line between confidence and arrogance and we can all overstep it sometimes.
We tend to avoid profiles that we think come across as arrogant or sound like they have their heads stuck up their arse. But someone else will come along see the same profile and think it's perfect.
Been swinging on and off for quite a few years but don't consider ourselves experts at all. We have a way that generlly works for us and appreciate that others often find different methods suit them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i think game is one of the nicest and genuine ladies onhere.
i could be wrong tho "
well my mum say i am to nice for my own good and i need to harden up or people will run all over me .... if i had a pound everytime she has said that i would be rich , i cant be what i am not .. i open my mouth and say it how it is i cant help it , lol ok wright it with my crap spellings , lolol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mines a wee bit arrogant, and I've managed it with no attention whatsoever
"
A wee bit?? Tbh it comes across as very arrogant, but its your profile your choice, . It's the anger in profiles that surprises me, it's supposed to be a bit of a laugh but some people take it all way to seriously |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this.
Personally i think far to many people take this swinging lark to serious
Ive been doing this about 11 years now, does that make me an authority on swinging? does it heck, i still have no idea what im doing half the time, i still get nervous, pick the wrong people at times and the day i turn into a know it all and get everything right to the point i can tell others what to do would be the day i stop, because thats when the excitment will stop
There is a lot of arrogance in swinging, mainly women im sad to say, but also see it in male halfs of couples, i have seen some womens proiles who have a great big list of dos and dont and you must this, you must look like that, exeptional men only, must be good looking etc and most of these women the guys wouldnt give a second look at walking down the street, but on here they are in high demande and because they get so much attention all of a sudden they turn into americas next top model in their heads and start getting well above their stations and think they have the rights to be rude and demanding, and men who think because they have a mrs they have the rights to be rude to single guys
Im over weight, i have stretch marks and flabby bits and i always will, all because loads of men want to fuck me does not make me any better looking than i am, it just means theres isnt as many woman so men on here get less fussy, i actually dont find it a confidance boost as i know most of the guys dont mail me as an individual they just mailing me because im a woman but i think lots really do think all these men think they are gorgeous and start scting accordingly as it goes to their head "
I love the way you put things having seen you in person at chams, i only wish i looked anywhere near as good.
But for me i know how bad my wobbly bits are so actually get turned off by to much flatteryi i prefer honesty. There are some of us not silly enough to let it go to our heads. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this
i agree totally with this and i just think to myself WHY THERE IS NO NEED swinging is meant to be people that are fun relaxed chilled not people throwing demands,thinking there sh*t dont smell and people thinking there better than others etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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""I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this
i agree totally with this and i just think to myself WHY THERE IS NO NEED swinging is meant to be people that are fun relaxed chilled not people throwing demands,thinking there sh*t dont smell and people thinking there better than others etc"
I have just gone back on my profile and re read what I have put. To me I still look at my profile as fun not arrogant. Also the messages that people send tend to reflect this.
Yes I have seen profiles where people state they more or less want to meet like minded beautiful people. Beauty is always in the eye of the beer holder. So people describing themselves as attractive always irritates me slightly and comes across as arrogant. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"
I have just gone back on my profile and re read what I have put. To me I still look at my profile as fun not arrogant. Also the messages that people send tend to reflect this.
"
Just had a peek at your profile text and have to agree it made me chuckle.
Loved your poem |
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"You saying that Im not really a supermodel and I shouldnt really enter Miss World next year? That men lie to me to get what they want?
Next you will be saying there's no santa!
I really dont care if I dont like a profile. I just move on. santa is real he was in the grotto in Asda , lol I did get a good look so he will be popping in over xmas sorting your stocking out. "
Thank god for that although...he doesn't fit my criteria. .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I have just gone back on my profile and re read what I have put. To me I still look at my profile as fun not arrogant. Also the messages that people send tend to reflect this.
Just had a peek at your profile text and have to agree it made me chuckle.
Loved your poem "
which one
its all about fun isnt it, swinging I mean. If you can't laugh at yourself who can you laugh at......cue for Soapy to enter the room  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love the dos and donts on some profiles lol....when they are listed like a shopping list it makes me giggle.
I used to have a really long profile...it was funny i guess in a sarcastic way but no one read it anyway. Now i have about 3 lines. xx |
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Well I think...
People take all this too seriously
People have the profile that suits them...ie it attracts the people they are interested in while putting off those they are not.
Sometimes its more about whether a guy has the confidence to mail rather that whether he looks like brad pitt. Confidence is attractive.
You have to sell yourself in your profile to attract those you are looking for.
I don't know about the rest of you but my guide is if they wouldn't have a chance down the pub they won't appeal on here either.
I don't have trouble attracting the sort of guys we seek on here...in real life but I feel more comfortable meeting guys who know the score from the beginning as it can lead to complications otherwise.
I never feel insulted if someones profile excludes us. I just move on.
We have met really gorgeous peeps and only one of them proved to be a little arrogant..which I found hilarious!
Maybe my sense of humour is just over developed.
Our profile is clear and precise and we do have messages from people to say just that. The thing is..it works for us. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We often look at other's profiles. It always disappoints us a little when we see a profile that has an endless string of conditions, usually written in upper case, with a dose of mild abuse thrown in at those who have not previously got the message.
We get winked and friend invited by people who have these conditions and on examination of their profile, we do not meet their criteria. We send an initial message to say we don't meet their expectations and usually we won't get an answer; mildly relieved but unabashed we move onward....
Sometimes though I get the impression that others create an impossible set of conditions to distance themselves further from others, to create a pigeonhole for a pigeon that doesn't exist in the real world...
(ps Jem loved your comment about the BDSM community offering guidance imposed philosophy and justifications - couldn't agree more, also the newly discovered wheel... lol)
Wolf
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I love the way you put things having seen you in person at chams, i only wish i looked anywhere near as good.
But for me i know how bad my wobbly bits are so actually get turned off by to much flatteryi i prefer honesty. There are some of us not silly enough to let it go to our heads."
aww bless you your tenners in the post lol
seriously tho, i feel the same, i hate to many compliments, i just think over flattery comes over as mockery
I dont need guys to mail me telling me i have a great arse, that im the sexiest woman on the site, that they think they're in love!! because none of its true so why say it? ok i dont want them to say, been looking for 6 months now with no joy so you'll do lol cause that wouldnt get them anywhere either, but just a normal message thats not full of false compliments |
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By *reyyaMan
over a year ago
North Yorkshire |
"I read through some of the profiles on this site and people are coming across as very arrogant. I can appreciate people get a lot of attention but is that any excuse to let it go to your head?
Also, for the more experienced swingers, do you consider yourselves the authority on swinging? I only say that after reading another thread which demanded verifications or you're not a "real" swinger.
Just wanted to know how everyone else felt on this.
Personally i think far to many people take this swinging lark to serious
Ive been doing this about 11 years now, does that make me an authority on swinging? does it heck, i still have no idea what im doing half the time, i still get nervous, pick the wrong people at times and the day i turn into a know it all and get everything right to the point i can tell others what to do would be the day i stop, because thats when the excitment will stop
There is a lot of arrogance in swinging, mainly women im sad to say, but also see it in male halfs of couples, i have seen some womens proiles who have a great big list of dos and dont and you must this, you must look like that, exeptional men only, must be good looking etc and most of these women the guys wouldnt give a second look at walking down the street, but on here they are in high demande and because they get so much attention all of a sudden they turn into americas next top model in their heads and start getting well above their stations and think they have the rights to be rude and demanding, and men who think because they have a mrs they have the rights to be rude to single guys
Im over weight, i have stretch marks and flabby bits and i always will, all because loads of men want to fuck me does not make me any better looking than i am, it just means theres isnt as many woman so men on here get less fussy, i actually dont find it a confidance boost as i know most of the guys dont mail me as an individual they just mailing me because im a woman but i think lots really do think all these men think they are gorgeous and start scting accordingly as it goes to their head "
+10+
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I worrie at times will thay like me .. I hope thay like me. But i can only be who i am and i do have them saying i look lovely and stuff i never did see myself like that and i dont let it go to my head as i know i am just Jo and on here we are all just one of a number like in chat rooms .. thay say it to everyone how sexy how lovely. Thers more to this swinging stuff then looks. I hope i am a nice person thats what i care about . jo xxx
See Jo I don't see you as arrogant whatsoever but I know you've been accused of it in the past.
I have absolutely no doubt you have lots of attention because everyone can see that you're an attractive and good looking lady.
You talk about aspects of your home life and holidays. I don't see anything wrong in that, you shouldn't be made to feel guilty about holidaying in the bahamas because you work for a living and its what you enjoy. Some people who are envious interpret it differently.
For me we are who we are, and we talk about aspects of that. Its when people start to put down others or make them feel inferior that I disagree with. And you Jo have never ever done that, you are simply honest and being you.
We've probably all been guilty of it at times though. Swinging does have a competitive edge to it.
I don't know anything about swinging and I'm not particularly talented at sex either. Before swinging I'd not had much experience. Like everyone there are parts of me which are great and parts not so good. Its best not to take it all too seriously "
With you 100% on this!
Jo, of all the people who've posted on these forums I think you're the sweetest.
I've never seen your posts as arrogant, you have a nice life which you've worked for, and good for you. If people are jealous of that - there's nothing you can do about that.
It's usually the same brigade that take umbridge if people have "professional" on their profiles.
As Iconic has said - most of us will talk about ourselves in some way. Sometimes you don't have to talk about yourself, you can tell by the way people put their thoughts across in the forums that they are comfortable in their own skin and don't seek validation from strangers.
Until the age of 44/45 I'd only been with one partner - my husband. I'd not call myself an expert - and at size 22 I'm not likely to be chased by the fashion houses of London, Paris or Rome.
The men I play with know better than to soft soap me! If they want to arse lick... |
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