FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Wanting to be owned
Wanting to be owned
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set"
Basically you just have her on her knees and cover her in man goo (I may have misunderstood the question) |
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"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
Basically you just have her on her knees and cover her in man goo (I may have misunderstood the question)"
Totally this lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
Basically you just have her on her knees and cover her in man goo (I may have misunderstood the question)
Totally this lmao "
in that case shit ive been owned  |
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"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
Basically you just have her on her knees and cover her in man goo (I may have misunderstood the question)
Totally this lmao
in that case shit ive been owned "
I’ve been owned several times then   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
Basically you just have her on her knees and cover her in man goo (I may have misunderstood the question)
Totally this lmao
in that case shit ive been owned
I’ve been owned several times then "
Welcome back  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Are you talking bdsm owned? If so as someone else has said you need to be A dominant/Master type of person..that way you can have an understanding of how to look after the submissive in your care.
Look on bdsm sites. There's many but not allowed to name them on here sorry. |
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And tbh when it comes to the BDSM side of things I’ve found with Dom’s I have played with in the past it’s been a natural thing for them and the after care too, I’ve recently found a influx of “doms” after the whole 50 shades films and most of them are wannabes |
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"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set"
You have to learn and earn respect, but also demonstrate that you will care for and protect the lady.
None of that happens overnight |
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"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
You have to learn and earn respect, but also demonstrate that you will care for and protect the lady.
None of that happens overnight "
100% this!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"How do you come across the type of lady that wants to be owned and have challenges set
You have to learn and earn respect, but also demonstrate that you will care for and protect the lady.
None of that happens overnight "
You will also have to learn to always make all the decisions - about everything - even when you don't want to and you just want a quiet time...
... and your decisions and choices will always have to be the right ones...
... and despite the apparent role of owner and owned - you will never actually be the one in control...
It's a tough job... Good luck!
|
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"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here"
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Good luck with it mate, this is no attack on anybody, however I think the 50 shades films have kind of made it look like a bit of fun that isn’t particularly serious or is just as and when you feel like it. |
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"Good luck with it mate, this is no attack on anybody, however I think the 50 shades films have kind of made it look like a bit of fun that isn’t particularly serious or is just as and when you feel like it."
Definitely! Some people think it’s a game but don’t realise it’s a lot more to it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too "
Yes I know this.... but being a Dom is a big financial responsibility.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too "
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements  |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements "
I apologise but I have to disagree with parts of what you said.
In my view the sub does not have the ultimate power. Yes a sub has the right to decide what happens to their body but that is the basic right of either party in any relationship. The sub does not control the top of the dom/me. I had some one ask me to o stuff I can't mention here, err, not my thing and not happening.
If the sub has ultimate control they are, are in my view, topping from the bottom.
I always find it interesting that some female subs put limitations on doms, that dommes would not accept.
If it is to be a full time relationship then both parties have to earn the trust and respect of the other. I am of the sadistic side if I don't feel I have true consent and we are not on the same page, it is too much of a risk, if the sub can't discuss specifics of consent I am ending the conversation. My negotiation/checklist runs to pages. The same applies if I am doing sensual or psychological play.
In my view (and I accept that people do things differently as there is no true way), apart from the requirement of full and honest consent and the lack of abuse, (and people argue over what is abuse) each relationship is different and it is a matching of mutual needs. People forget there are people with "destructive needs" and Mr/Miss nice person dom/me is not going to work for someone who wants there dom/me to do punish them and or then be gangbanged. Go on the site that can't be mentioned there are profiles like that.
My comment to OP as I have said to similar queries is what do you mean by being owned? Are you looking physical, psycholgical or sexual relationship. Being owned says to me a master slave dynamic. In which case as others have pointed out, what are you bringing to the table?
Also if people think meeting the right people to connect with on Fab is difficult then the fetish world is an even smaller and more difficult pool.
A D/S relationship is a relationship and therefore inexpensive apart from in time and empathy.
A BDSM relationship can be expensive if you are both into sensation, then yes whips, floggers, wax, violet wands, canes, and not forgetting pin wheels can add up. However some subs just like one thing like a spanking which OTK with your hand is pretty cheap.
But for me it all starts with trust, respect and communication.
I would add 50SOG is not to blame. The myths and nonsense that floats on the internet about BDSM is to blame.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements
I apologise but I have to disagree with parts of what you said.
In my view the sub does not have the ultimate power. Yes a sub has the right to decide what happens to their body but that is the basic right of either party in any relationship. The sub does not control the top of the dom/me. I had some one ask me to o stuff I can't mention here, err, not my thing and not happening.
If the sub has ultimate control they are, are in my view, topping from the bottom.
I always find it interesting that some female subs put limitations on doms, that dommes would not accept.
If it is to be a full time relationship then both parties have to earn the trust and respect of the other. I am of the sadistic side if I don't feel I have true consent and we are not on the same page, it is too much of a risk, if the sub can't discuss specifics of consent I am ending the conversation. My negotiation/checklist runs to pages. The same applies if I am doing sensual or psychological play.
In my view (and I accept that people do things differently as there is no true way), apart from the requirement of full and honest consent and the lack of abuse, (and people argue over what is abuse) each relationship is different and it is a matching of mutual needs. People forget there are people with "destructive needs" and Mr/Miss nice person dom/me is not going to work for someone who wants there dom/me to do punish them and or then be gangbanged. Go on the site that can't be mentioned there are profiles like that.
My comment to OP as I have said to similar queries is what do you mean by being owned? Are you looking physical, psycholgical or sexual relationship. Being owned says to me a master slave dynamic. In which case as others have pointed out, what are you bringing to the table?
Also if people think meeting the right people to connect with on Fab is difficult then the fetish world is an even smaller and more difficult pool.
A D/S relationship is a relationship and therefore inexpensive apart from in time and empathy.
A BDSM relationship can be expensive if you are both into sensation, then yes whips, floggers, wax, violet wands, canes, and not forgetting pin wheels can add up. However some subs just like one thing like a spanking which OTK with your hand is pretty cheap.
But for me it all starts with trust, respect and communication.
I would add 50SOG is not to blame. The myths and nonsense that floats on the internet about BDSM is to blame.
"
Very well said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements "
Absolutely agree.
Any Dom worth his weight in gold will know the Sub is actually the one with the power, since they are the one with the safe word & consent.
That means they hold the power, regardless of what the Dom is doing.
You need to understand that first before everything else. There are plenty fantastic blogs on BDSM that will tell you this and give you a lot of information as a beginner. |
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or View forums list | |
|
By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements
Absolutely agree.
Any Dom worth his weight in gold will know the Sub is actually the one with the power, since they are the one with the safe word & consent.
That means they hold the power, regardless of what the Dom is doing.
You need to understand that first before everything else. There are plenty fantastic blogs on BDSM that will tell you this and give you a lot of information as a beginner. "
With respect I entirely disagree and I can also point you to books and blogs as well. I have on other threads referenced Midori's book.
For me what skewers the understanding of the D/S relationship is that it is generally seen in the light of there being far more men doms than women subs on fab and on the scene. Therefore this gives the subs that are women a certain amount of power. But only to the extent that the male dom is unwilling to walk away. As I have said before if any male sub was to say to a domme that he had the ultimate power, she would very quickly show him otherwise in principle and in practice given the small number of dommes to the large number of male subs.
I also think that there is a mistaken assumption that D/S is all about dom's (meaning men) doing things to subs that are women. Whereas the perspective I see on the scene is subs (of either sex want things done to them by dom/mes or to do things for those dom/mes) and the dom/me can withold that. As I have said before why should a dom/me get into something that does not work for them, seriously any dom/me with self respect and skills is not that desperate. Therefore if subs are looking for doms to do things for the dom/me or have things done by the dom/me to them, and doms have the skills and abilities to satisfy the sub, it is a situation of mutual power and mutual agreement. To give a real world example I am supposed to be meeting someone at a club tonight and put them through their paces. I was also supposed to be at PRL tomorrow to do an intense rope scene with someone else. However I am ill in bed and have cancelled both, so unless the ultimate power comes with a magic wand to make me well, neither is controlling the relationships or scene.
I always say if I have someone gagged, tied and I have a crop, who has the ultimate power? The sub has the hope and belief they have chosen wisely someone who will respect their boundaries. If you unfortunately meet someone who does not understand those boundaries all the talk of ultimate power in the sub is of no help in the situation whatsoever.
I would refer you to the extract from an article I put on the bdsm thread.
But as I always say there is no true way and no true way of categorizing relationships.
So from a point of principle if someone is to say as a sub they have the ultimate power, then go fill your boots. But for ultimate power people to say that the dom is not of gold standard or does not know he is doing because the relationship is organised in another way (and both the sub and dom are happy e.g. on a mutual power basis) then frankly the ultimate power people are wrong and being blinkered to the variety of human experience. There is no true way in bdsm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements
Absolutely agree.
Any Dom worth his weight in gold will know the Sub is actually the one with the power, since they are the one with the safe word & consent.
That means they hold the power, regardless of what the Dom is doing.
You need to understand that first before everything else. There are plenty fantastic blogs on BDSM that will tell you this and give you a lot of information as a beginner.
With respect I entirely disagree and I can also point you to books and blogs as well. I have on other threads referenced Midori's book.
For me what skewers the understanding of the D/S relationship is that it is generally seen in the light of there being far more men doms than women subs on fab and on the scene. Therefore this gives the subs that are women a certain amount of power. But only to the extent that the male dom is unwilling to walk away. As I have said before if any male sub was to say to a domme that he had the ultimate power, she would very quickly show him otherwise in principle and in practice given the small number of dommes to the large number of male subs.
I also think that there is a mistaken assumption that D/S is all about dom's (meaning men) doing things to subs that are women. Whereas the perspective I see on the scene is subs (of either sex want things done to them by dom/mes or to do things for those dom/mes) and the dom/me can withold that. As I have said before why should a dom/me get into something that does not work for them, seriously any dom/me with self respect and skills is not that desperate. Therefore if subs are looking for doms to do things for the dom/me or have things done by the dom/me to them, and doms have the skills and abilities to satisfy the sub, it is a situation of mutual power and mutual agreement. To give a real world example I am supposed to be meeting someone at a club tonight and put them through their paces. I was also supposed to be at PRL tomorrow to do an intense rope scene with someone else. However I am ill in bed and have cancelled both, so unless the ultimate power comes with a magic wand to make me well, neither is controlling the relationships or scene.
I always say if I have someone gagged, tied and I have a crop, who has the ultimate power? The sub has the hope and belief they have chosen wisely someone who will respect their boundaries. If you unfortunately meet someone who does not understand those boundaries all the talk of ultimate power in the sub is of no help in the situation whatsoever.
I would refer you to the extract from an article I put on the bdsm thread.
But as I always say there is no true way and no true way of categorizing relationships.
So from a point of principle if someone is to say as a sub they have the ultimate power, then go fill your boots. But for ultimate power people to say that the dom is not of gold standard or does not know he is doing because the relationship is organised in another way (and both the sub and dom are happy e.g. on a mutual power basis) then frankly the ultimate power people are wrong and being blinkered to the variety of human experience. There is no true way in bdsm."
You are within your rights to disagree.
However my opinion still stands, I believe the Sub truly holds the power since they are the ones with the safe words and can stop any act with those safe words at any time.
Plenty of people would agree, and plenty would disagree. That’s what makes the world wonderful. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements
Absolutely agree.
Any Dom worth his weight in gold will know the Sub is actually the one with the power, since they are the one with the safe word & consent.
That means they hold the power, regardless of what the Dom is doing.
You need to understand that first before everything else. There are plenty fantastic blogs on BDSM that will tell you this and give you a lot of information as a beginner.
With respect I entirely disagree and I can also point you to books and blogs as well. I have on other threads referenced Midori's book.
For me what skewers the understanding of the D/S relationship is that it is generally seen in the light of there being far more men doms than women subs on fab and on the scene. Therefore this gives the subs that are women a certain amount of power. But only to the extent that the male dom is unwilling to walk away. As I have said before if any male sub was to say to a domme that he had the ultimate power, she would very quickly show him otherwise in principle and in practice given the small number of dommes to the large number of male subs.
I also think that there is a mistaken assumption that D/S is all about dom's (meaning men) doing things to subs that are women. Whereas the perspective I see on the scene is subs (of either sex want things done to them by dom/mes or to do things for those dom/mes) and the dom/me can withold that. As I have said before why should a dom/me get into something that does not work for them, seriously any dom/me with self respect and skills is not that desperate. Therefore if subs are looking for doms to do things for the dom/me or have things done by the dom/me to them, and doms have the skills and abilities to satisfy the sub, it is a situation of mutual power and mutual agreement. To give a real world example I am supposed to be meeting someone at a club tonight and put them through their paces. I was also supposed to be at PRL tomorrow to do an intense rope scene with someone else. However I am ill in bed and have cancelled both, so unless the ultimate power comes with a magic wand to make me well, neither is controlling the relationships or scene.
I always say if I have someone gagged, tied and I have a crop, who has the ultimate power? The sub has the hope and belief they have chosen wisely someone who will respect their boundaries. If you unfortunately meet someone who does not understand those boundaries all the talk of ultimate power in the sub is of no help in the situation whatsoever.
I would refer you to the extract from an article I put on the bdsm thread.
But as I always say there is no true way and no true way of categorizing relationships.
So from a point of principle if someone is to say as a sub they have the ultimate power, then go fill your boots. But for ultimate power people to say that the dom is not of gold standard or does not know he is doing because the relationship is organised in another way (and both the sub and dom are happy e.g. on a mutual power basis) then frankly the ultimate power people are wrong and being blinkered to the variety of human experience. There is no true way in bdsm.
You are within your rights to disagree.
However my opinion still stands, I believe the Sub truly holds the power since they are the ones with the safe words and can stop any act with those safe words at any time.
Plenty of people would agree, and plenty would disagree. That’s what makes the world wonderful."
Totally agree! People have the misconception that the Dom holds the power when it’s in fact the sub and people need to understand that too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be careful what you wish for.......
These Sub/Dom relationships are more work than conventional relationships.....
These relationships can be expensive also.....
Gear , toys , and equipment are not cheap....
If you’re prepared for all of this......
Fill your boots..... there are plenty of subs on here
It’s not just the equipment and toys it’s about how the Dom treats his sub and the after care too
Exactly. Also stating you're a dom does not make the person one. It's also about the dynamic. Subs are not looking for just anyone to be dominant with them. It is a special relationship, whereby the sub is the one with the ultimate power and the dominant has to earn the right, through trust and respect, not be given it freely. I've only now began exploring this side of me and only because one has finally managed to fit my requirements
Absolutely agree.
Any Dom worth his weight in gold will know the Sub is actually the one with the power, since they are the one with the safe word & consent.
That means they hold the power, regardless of what the Dom is doing.
You need to understand that first before everything else. There are plenty fantastic blogs on BDSM that will tell you this and give you a lot of information as a beginner.
With respect I entirely disagree and I can also point you to books and blogs as well. I have on other threads referenced Midori's book.
For me what skewers the understanding of the D/S relationship is that it is generally seen in the light of there being far more men doms than women subs on fab and on the scene. Therefore this gives the subs that are women a certain amount of power. But only to the extent that the male dom is unwilling to walk away. As I have said before if any male sub was to say to a domme that he had the ultimate power, she would very quickly show him otherwise in principle and in practice given the small number of dommes to the large number of male subs.
I also think that there is a mistaken assumption that D/S is all about dom's (meaning men) doing things to subs that are women. Whereas the perspective I see on the scene is subs (of either sex want things done to them by dom/mes or to do things for those dom/mes) and the dom/me can withold that. As I have said before why should a dom/me get into something that does not work for them, seriously any dom/me with self respect and skills is not that desperate. Therefore if subs are looking for doms to do things for the dom/me or have things done by the dom/me to them, and doms have the skills and abilities to satisfy the sub, it is a situation of mutual power and mutual agreement. To give a real world example I am supposed to be meeting someone at a club tonight and put them through their paces. I was also supposed to be at PRL tomorrow to do an intense rope scene with someone else. However I am ill in bed and have cancelled both, so unless the ultimate power comes with a magic wand to make me well, neither is controlling the relationships or scene.
I always say if I have someone gagged, tied and I have a crop, who has the ultimate power? The sub has the hope and belief they have chosen wisely someone who will respect their boundaries. If you unfortunately meet someone who does not understand those boundaries all the talk of ultimate power in the sub is of no help in the situation whatsoever.
I would refer you to the extract from an article I put on the bdsm thread.
But as I always say there is no true way and no true way of categorizing relationships.
So from a point of principle if someone is to say as a sub they have the ultimate power, then go fill your boots. But for ultimate power people to say that the dom is not of gold standard or does not know he is doing because the relationship is organised in another way (and both the sub and dom are happy e.g. on a mutual power basis) then frankly the ultimate power people are wrong and being blinkered to the variety of human experience. There is no true way in bdsm.
You are within your rights to disagree.
However my opinion still stands, I believe the Sub truly holds the power since they are the ones with the safe words and can stop any act with those safe words at any time.
Plenty of people would agree, and plenty would disagree. That’s what makes the world wonderful.
Totally agree! People have the misconception that the Dom holds the power when it’s in fact the sub and people need to understand that too "
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Communication, Trust, Respect, Honesty, Openness & Compatibility
Without all of the above in a D/s dynamic it wont work
I am owned by DomMan, we met on here! In this forum in fact, but it was just by complete chance, We both got very lucky! I very much doubt I would have ever found anyone else who is as compatible!
Despite what 50 shades may tell you there is much much more to being Dom than owning someone  and setting them challenges lol Its more than rough sex, its more than telling someone what to do! Submission starts in the head not in the body, he fucked my mind way way before he fucked me! Lots of people watched a film and thought they'd get their kicks by bossing someone round when realy they haven't got a clue!
One of the first things that struck me about DM was that he just had 'it' he was no pretending wannabe, even with that though if we hadn't clicked the way we had I would have never considered submitting to him (no matter how hot I thought he was!) Our D/s relationship is so so intense its like nothing I have ever experienced before and probably will never again, I trust him implicitly! Literally with my life, he knows me better than I seem to know myself, he knows what I want and what I need and he makes sure I get it! Tbh he looks after me better than I do myself!
Try exploring your dominant side more, see how you get on with a sub first because owning someone is a long long way down the line for you! Its not something I have done lightly and not something I would have done with just anyone its something real special!
I'm gonna tell him about this post, hopefully he will comment as he's much better at words than me and its still something I find hard to explain to people!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Communication, Trust, Respect, Honesty, Openness & Compatibility
Without all of the above in a D/s dynamic it wont work
I am owned by DomMan, we met on here! In this forum in fact, but it was just by complete chance, We both got very lucky! I very much doubt I would have ever found anyone else who is as compatible!
Despite what 50 shades may tell you there is much much more to being Dom than owning someone and setting them challenges lol Its more than rough sex, its more than telling someone what to do! Submission starts in the head not in the body, he fucked my mind way way before he fucked me! Lots of people watched a film and thought they'd get their kicks by bossing someone round when realy they haven't got a clue!
One of the first things that struck me about DM was that he just had 'it' he was no pretending wannabe, even with that though if we hadn't clicked the way we had I would have never considered submitting to him (no matter how hot I thought he was!) Our D/s relationship is so so intense its like nothing I have ever experienced before and probably will never again, I trust him implicitly! Literally with my life, he knows me better than I seem to know myself, he knows what I want and what I need and he makes sure I get it! Tbh he looks after me better than I do myself!
Try exploring your dominant side more, see how you get on with a sub first because owning someone is a long long way down the line for you! Its not something I have done lightly and not something I would have done with just anyone its something real special!
I'm gonna tell him about this post, hopefully he will comment as he's much better at words than me and its still something I find hard to explain to people!
"
Couldn't have said it better myself.
My mind was his before any of my body was.
Early days for us still. I trust him more than anyone else even when he tests my limits, yes there's hard limits in place but it would become stale if limits weren't pushed a little each time.
In answer to your question OP, discover what you want yourself, really think about it and only then see if there's anyone else out there with the same wishes.
Just remember that the person you are with will ultimately want you to respect them and their own limits. Without this, you'll risk abusing their trust and any relationship you may want to develop. |
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