FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > I am going to winge!!
I am going to winge!!
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I am getting annoyed now guys come on chat and say they get short shift off folk and what can they do to improve chances?
Accept no means no!!
We have had several single guys over the last few days come on and message about meeting, chatting etc... we send a polite message back saying (usually) to far away or no thanks. Then they keep coming back with the I can travel, i am reliable and variations on how can you refuse me?
That is when the hackles go up and reply in a stronger tone - resulting in replys saying we are going OTT!
so guys no means NO!!
Ok rant over, taking calming breaths and relaxing.
If they had just left it as ok sorry to have bothered you, the ones not so far away we may have kept not of names for the future, but to go on ensures they get blown out or blocked. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
Well I suppose a lot of guys live by the rule, the squeaky wheel get the most oil.
A lot of people like to have a valid reason why no, else they just go off thinking, "Damn another one that just thinks I am ugly"
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"Well I suppose a lot of guys live by the rule, the squeaky wheel get the most oil.
A lot of people like to have a valid reason why no, else they just go off thinking, "Damn another one that just thinks I am ugly"
Usually do give a reason, eg to far
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well I accept any no thanks, if u have the time to send it- I get enough interest and meets not to be bothered by a no thanks...unless the retort is something fucking stupid lol |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"Well I suppose a lot of guys live by the rule, the squeaky wheel get the most oil.
A lot of people like to have a valid reason why no, else they just go off thinking, "Damn another one that just thinks I am ugly"
Usually do give a reason, eg to far
"
What about those that message just to nit pick.. ps .. "too far" not "to far" hehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When some one mails back saying no ta, I always mail back with thanks for the reply, only polite. I dont see the point in moaning, wont get anyone anywhere other than the shit list.... |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"When some one mails back saying no ta, I always mail back with thanks for the reply, only polite. I dont see the point in moaning, wont get anyone anywhere other than the shit list...."
I do think that 90% of males do message back message back saying "thanks for the rely, sorry I can not tempt" or the such like. Problem is it is always the minority that stands out. The black dot on a sheet of white paper, so to speak.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't understand it either. Its just sex, its not that important surely, its a hobby, its fun. Some guys are like sodding tom cats, begging, pleading, offering to go to the ends of the earth. Its just sex, just a vagina, for fucks there's no need for all this begging all the time.
Same if you put a meet request or a status update. You set the date and you get random messages saying, ooo I'm really sorry I can't make that date, can we do the day after. I do wish guys would stop being stupid.
Were going to chams this afternoon for naughty afternoon sex. We put a status up just in case any of our friends are there, which I doubt, but the amount of messages I've had asking about membership and asking me the phone number of chams as they don't want to let me down. I am not google, neither have I agreed to play with anyone, I've said if you're going say hi, that's all. Phew I feel better now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tell guys that they are too far, they say that they can travel but so can I just not to where they are. I just stop messaging them and they get the message  |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
The problem is, for must guys this is not fun.. It is mostly just hard work.. You have to be on the sites all the time, sending messages all time, and when you are not, you are telling yourself it is just not you, that you are not ugly and that it is just the way it is.
If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.. If you are a male then could be months between mets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tell guys that they are too far, they say that they can travel but so can I just not to where they are. I just stop messaging them and they get the message "
what message I received nothing lol..... |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"The problem is, for must guys this is not fun.. It is mostly just hard work.. You have to be on the sites all the time, sending messages all time, and when you are not, you are telling yourself it is just not you, that you are not ugly and that it is just the way it is.
If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.. If you are a male then could be months between mets. "
jesus... really.....wow!! so may red flags and alarms went off just then
I am sorry... but if this is your attitude then I am not surprised you start all the threads you do.....
hard work.. is that how you honestly see it.... then the "oh woe is me"... really
it is suppose to be fun,
it is fun getting to know people,
it is fun meeting people at clubs,
it is fun meeting people at socials.......
you don't have to mail all the time, you just have to have fun interacting with people... |
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"The problem is, for must guys this is not fun.. It is mostly just hard work.. You have to be on the sites all the time, sending messages all time, and when you are not, you are telling yourself it is just not you, that you are not ugly and that it is just the way it is.
If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.. If you are a male then could be months between mets. "
Mate, if being on here feels like 'hard work', why stick with it? You make it sound like something you're being forced to do - it's meant to be a bit of fun! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Well it might be ok for people like Fabio who seem to have the whole day free to comment on every post.
Plus I think I said most guys "
you can work on the 9/11 archieve project i am working on now if you like... and we can swop places if you want.... heck.. tell ya what.. be my guest!
i still stand by what i said.. if the above is the attitude you take into the site... then I am not surprised you keep coming back and asking "where do i go wrong?"
the attitude in your post is horrid.... |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
Well there are people on this site that seem to try and bolster themselves up by trying to knock other people down.
You know the type..
Friendly useful posts that people like to read are often trashed by the same people over and over again.
I do not go on to this site with any attitude but the one where I wonder if I can tempt anyone and put a smile on a few faces. I do not ask "where do I go wrong"
Some of my posts just help to try people see the otherside of things. Not saying it is my side or not. Though if I have offend people by doing this, I am sorry
You can disagree on what I say, but I am not looking for personal attacks .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When some one mails back saying no ta, I always mail back with thanks for the reply, only polite. I dont see the point in moaning, wont get anyone anywhere other than the shit list...."
You get messages turning you down?? What's that all about? There are some crazy people out there. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"You get messages turning you down?? What's that all about? There are some crazy people out there."
Yeah, it just looking for a job.. you want for them rejection letters to hit the mat .. hehe |
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"Well there are people on this site that seem to try and bolster themselves up by trying to knock other people down.
You know the type..
Friendly useful posts that people like to read are often trashed by the same people over and over again.
I do not go on to this site with any attitude but the one where I wonder if I can tempt anyone and put a smile on a few faces. I do not ask "where do I go wrong"
Some of my posts just help to try people see the otherside of things. Not saying it is my side or not. Though if I have offend people by doing this, I am sorry
You can disagree on what I say, but I am not looking for personal attacks .."
if you feel someone is being traeted unfairly in forum ..then report it .
if you feel any post is just trashing someone ..then report it .
if you feel someone is persoanlly attcking you ..report it!
im afraid to say only personal attack was by yourself saying it was alright for likes of _abio ....
also have to say your comment saying its fine for single fems and cpls to get meets where as single guys go months without meets . speaking as half of a couple and looking for meets as a fem on my own i can tell you its still difficult !!! yes i could have a meet every day IF i wanted just any and every randomed who messaged me ,but i dont ! if a guy isnt what im looking for or dont click with them then i dont meet ! meny others will be the same and due to that only meet very rarely .
as for the op and issues with guys being abusive or not taking no for answer ... after youve said your no just block them ! they get a replie to their message and you dont have the stress of the ping pong "well why not " and "what if .." ect ect . tools are there you can continue to get worked up over it or actually do something to prevent it happening ,its in your hands |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
HAHAHAHAAAA
No!
Glad you agree "
Sorry, I was laughing at your suggestion that single women have no problem meeting people. You're wrong. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
HAHAHAHAAAA
No!
Glad you agree
Sorry, I was laughing at your suggestion that single women have no problem meeting people. You're wrong."
Really ???? Honesly??? Have you seen the number of verifications you have on your profile. Though I am assuming you are not speaking for yourself, and if this is the case I am sorry |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
HAHAHAHAAAA
No!
Glad you agree
Sorry, I was laughing at your suggestion that single women have no problem meeting people. You're wrong.
Really ???? Honesly??? Have you seen the number of verifications you have on your profile. Though I am assuming you are not speaking for yourself, and if this is the case I am sorry"
Yes, I've got a lot! And most of them are party, GB, club, or social meets. As for the rest, most of them I had to wait months for.
I wasn't saying I don't get meets. I was trying to say that its not as easy as men seem to think to get them. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
HAHAHAHAAAA
No!
Glad you agree
Sorry, I was laughing at your suggestion that single women have no problem meeting people. You're wrong.
Really ???? Honesly??? Have you seen the number of verifications you have on your profile. Though I am assuming you are not speaking for yourself, and if this is the case I am sorry
Yes, I've got a lot! And most of them are party, GB, club, or social meets. As for the rest, most of them I had to wait months for.
I wasn't saying I don't get meets. I was trying to say that its not as easy as men seem to think to get them. "
Well to all the single men out there that have been posting "What am I doing wrong" etc in the past week so, here is your answer ... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"If you are a couple or single female, and you fancy some fun you will have no problems finding.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
HAHAHAHAAAA
No!
Glad you agree
Sorry, I was laughing at your suggestion that single women have no problem meeting people. You're wrong.
Really ???? Honesly??? Have you seen the number of verifications you have on your profile. Though I am assuming you are not speaking for yourself, and if this is the case I am sorry
Yes, I've got a lot! And most of them are party, GB, club, or social meets. As for the rest, most of them I had to wait months for.
I wasn't saying I don't get meets. I was trying to say that its not as easy as men seem to think to get them.
Well to all the single men out there that have been posting "What am I doing wrong" etc in the past week so, here is your answer ... "
It's true that every one of those posts gets someone suggesting a club or social, so now you can see proof positive it works! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?"
is the glass always half empty in your world.... jeez...
socials... you put your name down...
clubs... you go and pay membership.... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?"
I believe most socials at clubs like Chams have open lists so anyone can get in. And the ones not at clubs seem pretty OK. You just have to get your name down early.
As for actually getting into clubs, there are very few with limited males. There are some, I agree, but the majority let men in. Now if you mean how expensive it is for guys to get into clubs, thats something to take up with the clubs. Its not Fabs fault, or indeed any of the couples and single girls you're trying to impress. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
is the glass always half empty in your world.... jeez...
socials... you put your name down...
clubs... you go and pay membership...."
He's a ray of sunshine, aint he. |
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"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?"
no idea about clubs but site socials you dont get invited , just watch the forums and when they are posted put your name down .. not hard at all. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
is the glass always half empty in your world.... jeez...
socials... you put your name down...
clubs... you go and pay membership...."
Is it that easy to get into a club as a single male? As I am sure I have heard it is not as easy as that.. maybe I am wrong though.. |
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By *tomComMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
I believe most socials at clubs like Chams have open lists so anyone can get in. And the ones not at clubs seem pretty OK. You just have to get your name down early.
As for actually getting into clubs, there are very few with limited males. There are some, I agree, but the majority let men in. Now if you mean how expensive it is for guys to get into clubs, thats something to take up with the clubs. Its not Fabs fault, or indeed any of the couples and single girls you're trying to impress."
So is easier and cheaper for females and couples to get into clubs? So it is easy for females and couple to get mets etc?
I can not believe I am the only male that is fighting in this corner..
Oh well |
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"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
is the glass always half empty in your world.... jeez...
socials... you put your name down...
clubs... you go and pay membership....
Is it that easy to get into a club as a single male? As I am sure I have heard it is not as easy as that.. maybe I am wrong though.."
if youve not actually tried it yourself how can you state its difficult then ???????  |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
is the glass always half empty in your world.... jeez...
socials... you put your name down...
clubs... you go and pay membership....
Is it that easy to get into a club as a single male? As I am sure I have heard it is not as easy as that.. maybe I am wrong though.."
Chams in Darlaston has a waiting list, and I think the Attic restricts males on certain nights, but pick a couples and singles night (usually Friday) and you should be fine. Check the website and maybe phone ahead so not to have a wasted journey. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"So is easier and cheaper for females and couples to get into clubs? So it is easy for females and couple to get mets etc?
I can not believe I am the only male that is fighting in this corner..
Oh well"
LOL you're not the only single man to complain about this on the forum by a long shot!
Of course it is easier for me to get a meet. The ratio of men to women on this site is 10 to one! But its not simple and, as stated above, I'm not going to drop my pants for everyone. I've been cancelled on, stood up, messed about, and let down, so saying women just snap their fingers and its shagtime is simplifying things wildly! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?"
so how did you do this then... its from your own profile...
"So far I have been lucky enough to have met some amazing people, both on here and at a few of the clubs."
so obviously you already know some of the process's for some of the clubs....
so what about socials... or have you already been to those as well..... (gotta love that green arrow.......) |
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"Well there are people on this site that seem to try and bolster themselves up by trying to knock other people down.
You know the type..
Friendly useful posts that people like to read are often trashed by the same people over and over again.
I do not go on to this site with any attitude but the one where I wonder if I can tempt anyone and put a smile on a few faces. I do not ask "where do I go wrong"
Some of my posts just help to try people see the otherside of things. Not saying it is my side or not. Though if I have offend people by doing this, I am sorry
You can disagree on what I say, but I am not looking for personal attacks ..
if you feel someone is being traeted unfairly in forum ..then report it .
if you feel any post is just trashing someone ..then report it .
if you feel someone is persoanlly attcking you ..report it!
im afraid to say only personal attack was by yourself saying it was alright for likes of _abio ....
also have to say your comment saying its fine for single fems and cpls to get meets where as single guys go months without meets . speaking as half of a couple and looking for meets as a fem on my own i can tell you its still difficult !!! yes i could have a meet every day IF i wanted just any and every randomed who messaged me ,but i dont ! if a guy isnt what im looking for or dont click with them then i dont meet ! meny others will be the same and due to that only meet very rarely .
as for the op and issues with guys being abusive or not taking no for answer ... after youve said your no just block them ! they get a replie to their message and you dont have the stress of the ping pong "well why not " and "what if .." ect ect . tools are there you can continue to get worked up over it or actually do something to prevent it happening ,its in your hands "
+1 well put |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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O
"Do you know how hard it is for single males to get into clubs or to get an invite to a social?
I believe most socials at clubs like Chams have open lists so anyone can get in. And the ones not at clubs seem pretty OK. You just have to get your name down early.
As for actually getting into clubs, there are very few with limited males. There are some, I agree, but the majority let men in. Now if you mean how expensive it is for guys to get into clubs, thats something to take up with the clubs. Its not Fabs fault, or indeed any of the couples and single girls you're trying to impress.
So is easier and cheaper for females and couples to get into clubs? So it is easy for females and couple to get mets etc?
I can not believe I am the only male that is fighting in this corner..
Oh well"
No, your just one of the ones brave enough to put your head above the parrapet. There are so many single guys on here wasting their time. I know that I am but i hang about for the forums,which I enjoy. Even there so many posts and replys are self serving and can be summed up as "aint I wonderful". So now like you I shall wait for the abuse and put downs from the usual suspects.But I'll stay a while longer and post if I have something to say. |
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"not as close as carlisle... A69... Newcastle...
I win.... 
see ya sat hopefully...  "
sorry not this time working early Sunday morning, would only get two hours sleep before work if we came over. be there for Christmas bash.
xx |
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"When some one mails back saying no ta, I always mail back with thanks for the reply, only polite. I dont see the point in moaning, wont get anyone anywhere other than the shit list...."
And people who accept that reply we have respect for. xx  |
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some might find it rude but we just don't reply back with a no thanks anymore as it has led to abuse
