FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > It's not looking good.... is It?
It's not looking good.... is It?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist? |
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Here we go again.
What is going on !!!
Loads of blokes on here moaning they can’t get messsges read let alone meets.
Loads of blokes, women and couples being let down, the above being quite typical.
Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhhhh  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, you are right. It is not going to happen.
Crap!! that's what I figured...."
Don't waste investing your time in someone who does not investing yours.
If he doesn't have the decency to, at least, text you to tell you that something came up... Then move on |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you folks. I will check the settings on my time-wast-o-metre, make sure it's working correctly & move on. Looks like I have a free saturday night now... Not the worst thing that could have happened!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you folks. I will check the settings on my time-wast-o-metre, make sure it's working correctly & move on. Looks like I have a free saturday night now... Not the worst thing that could have happened!!"
Flick your bean |
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Perhaps he wasn’t as single as you’d have liked him to be OP. Dam annoying waste of time and i feel silly that I get excited over meets when this happens. I try not to believe it’s going to happen now until it actually does. So no pre meet build up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
not going to happen now .
dont even give him the benefit of the doubt .
if hes ignoring you now he's not worth it .
p.s .........i'm free though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is disappointing when this happens huh!
I have wondered whether some people have actually fallen of the edge of the world on the basis that its all go and then bang; nothing!!  |
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I don’t think you’re being a pessimist, more a realist. The closer to a meet I get, the more contact with the lady I have to sort out all those last minute details so......send him one message saying if he doesn’t reply then you’ll assume he’s not interested and go from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not going to happen I'm afraid. Another man who is a dreamer or he has realised you're out of his league. Get yourself searching right now and find someone else 
Good luck OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps he wasn’t as single as you’d have liked him to be OP. Dam annoying waste of time and i feel silly that I get excited over meets when this happens. I try not to believe it’s going to happen now until it actually does. So no pre meet build up. "
Single NOT single sums it up.
We sat waiting in the pub for an hour for a meet who was all up for it then went quiet.
Then next day.... Account deleted. Clearly he was rumbled by his Mrs.
I think this stuff happens to all of us m/f single or couples. Take heart that your not the only one and that there are genuine folk out there. Just gotta find em. |
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"Here we go again.
What is going on !!!
Loads of blokes on here moaning they can’t get messsges read let alone meets.
Loads of blokes, women and couples being let down, the above being quite typical.
Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhhhh "
What's going on?
The answer is simple. It's too easy for timewasters to join Fab and ruin it for all the genuine swingers. The amount of posts about letdowns show the problem has become serious. It might even end up destroying Fab as genuine swingers migrate away to other sites leaving Fab as a community of timewasters.
We'll almost defintely see out this current subscription, but there's a big question mark over whether we re-subscribe. Plus we've made all but one pic public (we used to have quite a few).
I've said it before, the fly-by-night timewasters need to be deterred. They should only have access to site functionality if they fully subscribe with photo validation etc. It obviously won't deter them all, but as it stands it's too easy for them and they're spoiling the experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
You’re right happens a lot, he’ll come back with some excuse I’m sure and expect another meet to be arranged x |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Don't even step in the shower lol! Sorry you've been misled!  |
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"Perhaps he wasn’t as single as you’d have liked him to be OP. Dam annoying waste of time and i feel silly that I get excited over meets when this happens. I try not to believe it’s going to happen now until it actually does. So no pre meet build up. "
This is how we approach meets now....no expectations, everything is a bonus then |
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Certainly dont get ready or leave the house to meet without some sort of message. What a creep! why do people do that! so blooming hurtful.
You can understand a change of heart but the very least he could do is discuss, rather than disappear with no message.
Hope you can find another date tonight. |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Plan B... me?  |
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I don’t understand the logic behind the premise that if everyone has to pay and get photo verified etc. then that will reduce the number of timewasters. There’s never any evidence to back this assumption up and in my opinion, it’s a hiding to nothing. Why? Timewasters really really love wasting people’s time, the chat, the chase, the thought someone is waiting for them and they really get off on it and will be willing to pay for the experience. Twats have money as well as ‘genuine’ folk. Photo verification doesn’t mean anything with cut n paste digital technology. |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?
Plan B... me? "
Smooth...what a gentleman lol |
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"perhaps his mrs has booked a surprise weekend away with the kids "
And that folks is the odds on favourite.
This site (and others) is full of married men arranging meets in the hope that they can sneak away from the Mrs for a few hours.
When the excuse falls flat, or he thinks about the consequences, or the Mrs has other ideas he disappears.
Stick to meeting in clubs, at least if you get a no show it doesn't spoil the night.
That is what we do and it works fine. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately it's what the site has become, verified, non verified we don't think it makes much difference, we have changed how we play very recently and it's just as frustrating, it's a good job we enjoy clubs.x |
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By *apmanMan
over a year ago
Harpenden |
I'm new to fab and had my first let down last Sunday. Sat in the pub for an hour but at least I had pleasant surroundings. Put it down to experience & moved on. Having read these comments I guess I will have to lower my expectations.
OP you look gorgeous - shame I'm outside your age range ???? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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always makes me laugh when guys say " Well it's his loss " How can it be his loss ? if he wanted to meet he would. if he does not want to meet he won't. so why is it his loss ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Going quiet is the worst, at least have the balls to say your not turning, at least gives peeps chance to find someone else, as some peoples free time to play can be rare |
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"always makes me laugh when guys say " Well it's his loss " How can it be his loss ? if he wanted to meet he would. if he does not want to meet he won't. so why is it his loss ? "
People are assuming the OP is a lovely lady and sympathising is all, trying to reassure her....and maybe he badly wanted to meet her and bottled it anyway, it happens a lot on here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"always makes me laugh when guys say " Well it's his loss " How can it be his loss ? if he wanted to meet he would. if he does not want to meet he won't. so why is it his loss ?
People are assuming the OP is a lovely lady and sympathising is all, trying to reassure her....and maybe he badly wanted to meet her and bottled it anyway, it happens a lot on here!"
I'm sure she is . but he can meet her if he wants too . so if he chooses not too . it can't be his loss |
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"always makes me laugh when guys say " Well it's his loss " How can it be his loss ? if he wanted to meet he would. if he does not want to meet he won't. so why is it his loss ?
People are assuming the OP is a lovely lady and sympathising is all, trying to reassure her....and maybe he badly wanted to meet her and bottled it anyway, it happens a lot on here! I'm sure she is . but he can meet her if he wants too . so if he chooses not too . it can't be his loss "
Maybe he can't meet her 'cos his conscience won't let him......or his wife!?
Anyway, I agree to differ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The site unfortunately has become mainstream which means there are now lots more time wasters and people who talk the talk but when it comes to meeting never do.
A perfect example was yesterday I saw a profile that was using someone else pics and was obviously fake. The profile had a few verifications ut when you go through the verifications it was a round robin of fake profiles and fake verifications.
The problem with time wasters and fake profiles could be solved very very easily.
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By *av_55Man
over a year ago
NE |
"Thank you folks. I will check the settings on my time-wast-o-metre, make sure it's working correctly & move on. Looks like I have a free saturday night now... Not the worst thing that could have happened!!"
fuck him and the horse he rode in on ,, another nail in the coffin for single men (he probably wasn’t ) ,, forget, move on, block, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just as F@B has said don’t waste you time and do not take it as ‘rejection’ as we are all posting about... this sort of thing can make you feel really insecure but you have to remember it is HIS problem NOT yours...
So dust yourself down.. take a big breath and start looking again!!! As hard as it is!!!
Hugs xx |
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"Thank you folks. I will check the settings on my time-wast-o-metre, make sure it's working correctly & move on. Looks like I have a free saturday night now... Not the worst thing that could have happened!!fuck him and the horse he rode in on ,, another nail in the coffin for single men (he probably wasn’t ) ,, forget, move on, block, "
Do you think it was really a woman |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Kik is known to be the timewasters choice. Real meets always Whatsapp. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unfortunately it's what the site has become, verified, non verified we don't think it makes much difference, we have changed how we play very recently and it's just as frustrating, it's a good job we enjoy clubs.x"
We mainly meet males and decided to change our approach.
We had always been proactive search wise and experienced the let downs.
We changed to looking for newbies before they had become disillusioned with fab life ie, weeks, months of no meets or messages.
WE thought that maybe they had simply came to the conclusion that they were going to be stood up so didn't bother on the day.
Their natural nerves plus the negative opinion they must have developed over time of getting nowhere must be affecting them.
It worked, the first two turned up, some let us down, but on the whole things improved.
Their initial excitement helped them overcome their nerves ?
BTW lads, we only meet with those we messaged |
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By *av_55Man
over a year ago
NE |
"Thank you folks. I will check the settings on my time-wast-o-metre, make sure it's working correctly & move on. Looks like I have a free saturday night now... Not the worst thing that could have happened!!fuck him and the horse he rode in on ,, another nail in the coffin for single men (he probably wasn’t ) ,, forget, move on, block,
Do you think it was really a woman "
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Sorry to hear that. Sounds like he’s blocked you rather than have the balls to say no thank you!
It happens way too much sadly.
I’m just thankful I’ve never actually left the house and sat somewhere waiting. I always ask for a ‘I have left’ message before I leave.
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"With the demise of Craigslists adults section things will only get worse.  "
I used to use CL back in the day and I got some good meets from it.
If someone goes quiet I'd give them 24 hours grace then bin and move on.
It's annoying but not the end of the world.
Making this a paid site won't stop time wasters and fantasists. There have still been pockets of these on any paid sites I've used.
I think it would be more effective to have a "cooling off period "(maybe a week?)between joining and being able to send messages, which would cut all the Feeling Horny Friday to Monday joiners.
And also if you leave the site you are unable to rejoin for a month/three months/whatever.That would put paid to the boomerang gang.Ooh I've left!Ooh I'm back again! Ooh f@ck off!
Making everyone pay due to the behavior of a minority isn't the way forward.
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By *appytochatMan
over a year ago
Deep in the New Forest |
"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
I'd say the wife has got hold of his phone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I
being a pessimist?"
Yeah it's not going to happen! Do you want me to come instead |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
It’ll be a woman pretending to be an unmarried man.
Like fleas on a sloths scrotum on here. |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol  |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol "
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing. |
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We were stood up last week by a well verified, site supporting couple. When we messaged them to ask them what happened to them they just blocked us! There doesn’t seem to be any foolproof way on here, it looks like it’s pot luck unfortunately  |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing."
Okay, who is meddling with my vowels... wheat.
If you meat up with Boris the imp from a cyberspace give him a slap please????????
Boris!!!!!! Meet, |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing."
Well one guy was 2 years just chatting before we met but he said it was worth the wait lol so happy ending |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing.
Okay, who is meddling with my vowels... wheat.
If you meat up with Boris the imp from a cyberspace give him a slap please????????
Boris!!!!!! Meet,"
Oh I have had a Boris messaging just the other day |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing.
Okay, who is meddling with my vowels... wheat.
If you meat up with Boris the imp from a cyberspace give him a slap please????????
Boris!!!!!! Meet,
Oh I have had a Boris messaging just the other day "
Not BORIS, Baris? |
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One thing I am finding is that my effort level in getting ready is dwindling. Instead of the excitement, I find myself wondering if I'm wasting electricity straightening my hair, or wasting make up ect, "can I be arsed to shave my legs, fuck it, it's just a social so why bother"
Pretty soon I'll be heading out in my onesie and slippers on the effort scale, hair tied back and a unibrow.
5 mins before panic strikes that actually he might show and I'm a tramp. |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"This is why I usually chat to a guy for about a year before arranging to meet, if he's still chatting after that long it's more or less guaranteed he will turn up and when you do find the good one's hold on to them lol
Only a year - wow, we would let them be longer, then ask to meet in a club, chaff wheet type thing.
Okay, who is meddling with my vowels... wheat.
If you meat up with Boris the imp from a cyberspace give him a slap please????????
Boris!!!!!! Meet,
Oh I have had a Boris messaging just the other day
Not BORIS, Baris?"
HaHa your vowels are mixed up lol |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...just a dreaming tosser who cant get it up . name and shame him .. this is the problem with this site ... why cant they have a £20 monthly fee to belong that would get rid of most of the idiots
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
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Incredibly frustrating, I can only apologise for the fucktards on this site. They let you down and make this more difficult for others to get meets.
After looking at your profile, he must be f&@king mad...
Hope things improve
HG
X |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Unfortunately it sounds like the standard operating procedure for a non-meet, or in other words a timewaster, man,woman or couple it's the same all round, had it happen to me, comes with the territory I'm afraid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry that hes let you down ive had that, plenty more people to choose from.
Ive got one now that he says he wants to meet but too busy another time waster. |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Sorry to say this but I bet his wife/girlfriend wouldn't let him play out. |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
He's clearly mad as a chatter to pass up such an opportunity |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im guessing his car wouldnt start and he called the AA or rac and his membership had run out ..
or he forgot it was his mums birthday and she turned up at his house un announced
possibly work rang him and he had to go in to cover..
he might of run the bath in preperation to meet you , forgot it was running and flooded the kitchen ..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry to hear this OP. Seems all too common.
I started talking to a guy who's status said he'd been catfished- what a horrible thing says I,- yea says he. A few messages later it is decided to meet for a drink as i'm in town, and he has no plans
Agree to meet at 9. 8:30 he disappears, only to appear to say "sorry, I've been helping a neighbour" i'll be another hour.
Annoyed but think ok.
9.45 comes and still not heard anything.
During this time I get a message off another guy - fancy a drive.
Yup; meet 2nd guy, have a lovely evening.
10.15 the first guy messages saying he is just leaving. I say don't bother. I don't appreciate being kept waiting for well over an hour after the meeting time.
And there I was feeling sorry for him being catfished.
Seems to be most guys are all talk.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mmmmmhhh .... just before the weekend .....like a lot of folk ... hes not being honest with you OP ..... men are like buses ... There will be another one along in a minute ... "
Well that's charming |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
So sorry to hear that Hun, hate time wasters like that, anyway you are gorgeous xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here we go again.
What is going on !!!
Loads of blokes on here moaning they can’t get messsges read let alone meets.
Loads of blokes, women and couples being let down, the above being quite typical.
Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhhhh "
Welcome to swinging sites now! |
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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago
'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks |
I had a similar situation on Friday night but with a man ive met semi regularly and considered a friend when in fact he's just an epic cunt...i could even see he was online and in the chatrooms...we had only arranged it the day before. Im blocked now...fucking dick! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a similar situation on Friday night but with a man ive met semi regularly and considered a friend when in fact he's just an epic cunt...i could even see he was online and in the chatrooms...we had only arranged it the day before. Im blocked now...fucking dick!"
surely you have his mobile number if semi regular |
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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago
'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks |
"I had a similar situation on Friday night but with a man ive met semi regularly and considered a friend when in fact he's just an epic cunt...i could even see he was online and in the chatrooms...we had only arranged it the day before. Im blocked now...fucking dick!
surely you have his mobile number if semi regular"
I rang him and text him only to be ignored! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not just men that waste time. Ive been chatting to a woman for many months, have exchanged several pics etc, but each time I'm in her area she has some reason as to why she cant meet. Not bothering anymore. |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"I had a similar situation on Friday night but with a man ive met semi regularly and considered a friend when in fact he's just an epic cunt...i could even see he was online and in the chatrooms...we had only arranged it the day before. Im blocked now...fucking dick!
surely you have his mobile number if semi regular
I rang him and text him only to be ignored!"
Stick to clubs, next time we see you nod to join in, we certain wouldn’t ignore you, somethings are far too good not to waste. |
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By *ophleeCouple
over a year ago
Fareham |
"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
Unfortunately thus seems to have become the norm on here now, actual meets are becoming a rarity which is very sad for all the actual genuine people looking to play. Good luck to all those genuine swingers and let's hope one day the time wasters get bored |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?
Unfortunately thus seems to have become the norm on here now, actual meets are becoming a rarity which is very sad for all the actual genuine people looking to play. Good luck to all those genuine swingers and let's hope one day the time wasters get bored"
 and hello |
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"Here we go again.
What is going on !!!
Loads of blokes on here moaning they can’t get messsges read let alone meets.
Loads of blokes, women and couples being let down, the above being quite typical.
Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhhhh "
Aaaaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhh!!!! indeed! I just don't get it??? Meets, socials and clubs are just great. So many lovely people to meet and fun to be had. No good reason not to turn up! |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
I think Some people are more comfortable with online relationships and the realty of meeting is another matter.
This has happened so many times to me I kind of expect it.
I would actually be surprised if I ever came across someone who actually meets |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"Here we go again.
What is going on !!!
Loads of blokes on here moaning they can’t get messsges read let alone meets.
Loads of blokes, women and couples being let down, the above being quite typical.
Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhhhh "
I think a lot of people on here prefer the fantasy of swinging but will chicken out of the reality of meeting. It can be a catch 22 The ones that are easy to talk to online may be the ones who don't do well socialising in real life. I admit I find it hard conversing online But Do better when I meet for real as it feels more natural |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?
Kik is known to be the timewasters choice. Real meets always Whatsapp."
That's not accurate. I never give out my number to meets so all mine have been arranged through kik |
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"I think Some people are more comfortable with online relationships and the realty of meeting is another matter.
This has happened so many times to me I kind of expect it.
I would actually be surprised if I ever came across someone who actually meets"
Thousands of people meet on here, you must be selecting the wrong people! |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?
Kik is known to be the timewasters choice. Real meets always Whatsapp.
That's not accurate. I never give out my number to meets so all mine have been arranged through kik "
Yup agreed, I use kik too, and have never let anyone down or stood anyone up x |
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By *ustme6Man
over a year ago
tamworth |
"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?
Unfortunately thus seems to have become the norm on here now, actual meets are becoming a rarity which is very sad for all the actual genuine people looking to play. Good luck to all those genuine swingers and let's hope one day the time wasters get bored"
Personally never view a meeting is even likely until one of the following ...
1. Exchange kik
2. Exchange email
3. Exchange numbers
4. Actually chat
Rest is 'online banter' real or imagined.
4. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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At least you had warning, going quiet a couple of days beforehand.
When I arrange to meet someone I always stay in contact, even up to the hour before as I don't want my time wasted either.
I'm not criticising the op, she has already said she will be fine tuning her bs, but I do think many people allow there time to be wasted. I had a similar experience to the op, several years ago with a couple from here. All was fine until two days before the meet, when they went quiet. I mailed them the day of the meet, saying that unless I heard from them I wouldn't be attending. A few hours later she messaged to say they had changed their minds and felt we weren't compatible after all. If I hadn't heard after sending a mail I wouldn't have gone. Therefore I wouldn't have wasted my time. Mainly it comes down to common sense and the op used hers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Recently connected with a guy on here, swapped loads of messages, at least 3 a day , hubby and I booked into a hotel, he messaged/text all day. His arrival at our hotel was for 9pm. At 9.01 he became "No longer a user". Was verified as well !
3rd time on the trot , our "meeting" didn't happen
I honestly believe this site should be a paid for site, to sort the genuine ones from the wanna`b`s. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At least you had warning, going quiet a couple of days beforehand.
When I arrange to meet someone I always stay in contact, even up to the hour before as I don't want my time wasted either.
I'm not criticising the op, she has already said she will be fine tuning her bs, but I do think many people allow there time to be wasted. I had a similar experience to the op, several years ago with a couple from here. All was fine until two days before the meet, when they went quiet. I mailed them the day of the meet, saying that unless I heard from them I wouldn't be attending. A few hours later she messaged to say they had changed their minds and felt we weren't compatible after all. If I hadn't heard after sending a mail I wouldn't have gone. Therefore I wouldn't have wasted my time. Mainly it comes down to common sense and the op used hers."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Recently connected with a guy on here, swapped loads of messages, at least 3 a day , hubby and I booked into a hotel, he messaged/text all day. His arrival at our hotel was for 9pm. At 9.01 he became "No longer a user". Was verified as well !
3rd time on the trot , our "meeting" didn't happen
I honestly believe this site should be a paid for site, to sort the genuine ones from the wanna`b`s. "
It happens on the pay for sites too, there should be a trip advisor style star rating for profiles |
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"Always trust your gut"
Yep and I've found that the more messages are sent the less chance there is of a real meet coming off.
I generally exchange a few messages, agree a time/date for a meet be it social or otherwise, and ask them to contact me again the day before.
I don't find it useful to chat 24/7 prior to a meet.In fact I find it a turn off.
If I don't hear from someone as agreed 24 hours before a meet I presume it's off.
You get to be able to spot people who are just messaging for wank material or have no intention of a real meet.
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Recently connected with a guy on here, swapped loads of messages, at least 3 a day , hubby and I booked into a hotel, he messaged/text all day. His arrival at our hotel was for 9pm. At 9.01 he became "No longer a user". Was verified as well !
3rd time on the trot , our "meeting" didn't happen
I honestly believe this site should be a paid for site, to sort the genuine ones from the wanna`b`s. "
It might deter the poorer wankers and serial profile deleters, but some fantasists have money. |
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By *heangelWoman
over a year ago
wonderland |
"Always trust your gut
Yep and I've found that the more messages are sent the less chance there is of a real meet coming off.
I generally exchange a few messages, agree a time/date for a meet be it social or otherwise, and ask them to contact me again the day before.
I don't find it useful to chat 24/7 prior to a meet.In fact I find it a turn off.
If I don't hear from someone as agreed 24 hours before a meet I presume it's off.
You get to be able to spot people who are just messaging for wank material or have no intention of a real meet.
Good luck! "
I agree with this tbf |
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Has happened so many times to me since joining....a lot of men on here are just after dirty talk and given 95% are married they bottle it last minute before a meet (or have no intention of ever meeting).
Extremely frustrating but the nature of the site I’m afraid. There are some amazing and genuine people on here though so don’t let it put you off.
It’s their loss!
Xx |
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On another thread a suggestion was mooted , and the more I think about it , the better it seems .
So here goes .
When a meet is agreed between 2 parties , each party ticks a box on what we might call the meet agreed contract . So there is concrete evidence that the meet has been arranged . If either party has to cancel for a legitimate reason , there is a box to tick which they can enter a brief text saying why . This way the other party knows they are not going to show , and admin can keep tabs on how often it happens .
If they don’t show up for the meet , the party that did show can obviously do as they do now , report the no show . I’m not quite sure how it could be done in such a way that it couldn’t be abused by liars though on this one . I guess if the same people are reported more than a few times by different people ?
If anyone has any other good ideas to try and prevent the scourge of the people that ruin the site by arranging meets and not showing up , it would be good to hear them .
Maybe then admin would put some in place , and help us enjoy the full experience of the site a little more . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On another thread a suggestion was mooted , and the more I think about it , the better it seems .
So here goes .
When a meet is agreed between 2 parties , each party ticks a box on what we might call the meet agreed contract . So there is concrete evidence that the meet has been arranged . If either party has to cancel for a legitimate reason , there is a box to tick which they can enter a brief text saying why . This way the other party knows they are not going to show , and admin can keep tabs on how often it happens .
If they don’t show up for the meet , the party that did show can obviously do as they do now , report the no show . I’m not quite sure how it could be done in such a way that it couldn’t be abused by liars though on this one . I guess if the same people are reported more than a few times by different people ?
If anyone has any other good ideas to try and prevent the scourge of the people that ruin the site by arranging meets and not showing up , it would be good to hear them .
Maybe then admin would put some in place , and help us enjoy the full experience of the site a little more ."
Admin provide a site where adults can exchange details and meet if they want to. It's not a baby sitting service.
There have been cases where some people get 'enemies' in the scene. Someone could create fake profiles, arrange multiple meets then lie and say the other never turned up. The person would be banned when they had done nothing wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I'd never give my phone number to a guy here after my episode with a stalker.
I think I've been quite lucky. Only encountered one chicken just after I joined and we even had a social. Lesson learnt though and I've met lovely guys who turn up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Always trust your gut
Yep and I've found that the more messages are sent the less chance there is of a real meet coming off.
I generally exchange a few messages, agree a time/date for a meet be it social or otherwise, and ask them to contact me again the day before.
I don't find it useful to chat 24/7 prior to a meet.In fact I find it a turn off.
If I don't hear from someone as agreed 24 hours before a meet I presume it's off.
You get to be able to spot people who are just messaging for wank material or have no intention of a real meet.
Good luck! "
I would agree to this to an extent. If someone is only talking about what they want to do (to you) when you meet and you respond in kind then the chances are it is someone just having their jollies. If, however the conversation is general, maybe 'looking forward to xday' as mine would be or 'are you still ok for xday?' then you are giving nothing that someone could wank to. If you continue in a vein akin to a porn phone chat then the likelihood is you are giving them what they want before you meet. Again common sense, surely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
he's married |
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"On another thread a suggestion was mooted , and the more I think about it , the better it seems .
So here goes .
When a meet is agreed between 2 parties , each party ticks a box on what we might call the meet agreed contract . So there is concrete evidence that the meet has been arranged . If either party has to cancel for a legitimate reason , there is a box to tick which they can enter a brief text saying why . This way the other party knows they are not going to show , and admin can keep tabs on how often it happens .
If they don’t show up for the meet , the party that did show can obviously do as they do now , report the no show . I’m not quite sure how it could be done in such a way that it couldn’t be abused by liars though on this one . I guess if the same people are reported more than a few times by different people ?
If anyone has any other good ideas to try and prevent the scourge of the people that ruin the site by arranging meets and not showing up , it would be good to hear them .
Maybe then admin would put some in place , and help us enjoy the full experience of the site a little more .
Admin provide a site where adults can exchange details and meet if they want to. It's not a baby sitting service.
There have been cases where some people get 'enemies' in the scene. Someone could create fake profiles, arrange multiple meets then lie and say the other never turned up. The person would be banned when they had done nothing wrong. "
I fully agree that they don’t provide a babysitting service . We arrange that , at a considerable cost I might add . I can asure you that there’s nothing more annoying than having found a suitable sitter and formed out for it , for someone to simply not show up for an arranged meet . And it’s not just that , it’s the fact that you are sat around feeling like a Billy no mates in many cases . We are lucky as we have each other , but what about the singles who get let down ?
Moving on to those who may have made enemies . That’s always going to be a possibility , and I don’t know how that could be 100% eradicated , but t be fair it could be done now couldn’t it ?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve been here 8 months, the first seven went really well, but just recently I’ve been let down several times at the last minute. I’ve also had long message conversations with god knows how many men who just vanish, after telling me how keen they are to meet!
Old timers here tell me that this happen from time to time, so I’ll grin and bear it, but it is really annoying.
Seems this happens to all of us here not just ladies |
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"I’ve been here 8 months, the first seven went really well, but just recently I’ve been let down several times at the last minute. I’ve also had long message conversations with god knows how many men who just vanish, after telling me how keen they are to meet!
Old timers here tell me that this happen from time to time, so I’ll grin and bear it, but it is really annoying.
Seems this happens to all of us here not just ladies "
Yep, definitely! They'd turn up if they knew how fabulous you are! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unless this site changes its policy on subscriptions it will get worse I think. "
Won't make any difference. People are happy to pay to fuck other people around. It was the same when I tried subscription dating sites and it's not gender specific....Plenty of ladies fail to appear. Hazard of the pastime.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist? he's married"
People say that about me lol |
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"I'm due to be meeting someone for the first time this evening. It's taken a couple of weeks to get our diaries together but the conversation has been regular & interesting. Until Thursday when he's gone silent, the last 2 messages on kik are showing as sent not delivered & he has not been on here for 2 days...
I have a feeling it's not going to happen Or am I being a pessimist?"
I see this type of message either in forums or in status’ all to often and it really annoys me when there are guys on here who are struggling to even get there messages read to even get to the point of arranging a meet, and yes I’m included, but I’ll keep plodding along, law of averages says one will come along soon enough 
Feel for you op |
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