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Chasing women who want to be chased?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How does that work? Are such women ever actually worth chasing? Or is this just an online thing done by messed up women seeking obsequious flattery?
Whether it's dating or fucking, having such a one-sided situation where the man is putting in all the effort, and the woman either accepts or deflects it, doesn't bode well. Surely?!? 
I'm conflicted. On the one hand most of the women I'm attracted to clearly think I should be doing all the chasing. On the other, the mere fact that they think this is a bit off-putting. I'm looking for something mutual. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Me and my last lover met in a park, the spark between us was electric, she fell at my feet and at that moment i realised... these tazers are awesome  "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm open to learning from the players on here  (so feel free to chip in guys if you're a chaser and know how to deal with these types)
But there is some serious high horse crap in the way some women think of themselves which is severely off putting. Maybe it's just Darwinian survival of the fittest in action. But quite frankly... if they want to mate with players and twats who think they're "alpha males"... if that's the kind of guy they want to attract... well they can fill their boots imo |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like the idea of being chased but it's 2018 and I'm bold enough to say I'm interested!!
If it's too much effort I'd be put off to OP. "
I don't mind taking the lead, showing I'm interested, paying the bills, and romancing a woman (I'm talking about dating now... I know you run a mile when I bring out my lovey dovey stuff Lady Lick ). It's more the whole idea of throwing myself at an unresponsive zombie until she finally accepts my advances... that's what I construe those who want to be chased are looking for. ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone needs to chase me like that, it means I am not that into them. I understand that some like to be chased, but if a person doesn't seem that responsive, once effort has been made, I would see that as a red flag.... Plenty more people out there who don't expect a person to jump through hoops to spend time with them. The dynamic needs to be more equal, not one sided. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I sense dissatisfaction OP.
Have you been rejected by any chance?"
Not rejection no. Probably more frustration with the whole online thing. It seems like it's all chase or be chased and I'm missing something in between. Someone should invent a singles forum where you can just hang out and chat |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I sense dissatisfaction OP.
Have you been rejected by any chance?
Not rejection no. Probably more frustration with the whole online thing. It seems like it's all chase or be chased and I'm missing something in between. Someone should invent a singles forum where you can just hang out and chat "
They have
They are called pubs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If someone needs to chase me like that, it means I am not that into them. I understand that some like to be chased, but if a person doesn't seem that responsive, once effort has been made, I would see that as a red flag.... Plenty more people out there who don't expect a person to jump through hoops to spend time with them. The dynamic needs to be more equal, not one sided. "
Thanks for this Mystiquexx. I feel exactly the same. You make me feel like I'm not completely naive in dating for being allergic to too much chasing. Thanks   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I sense dissatisfaction OP.
Have you been rejected by any chance?
Not rejection no. Probably more frustration with the whole online thing. It seems like it's all chase or be chased and I'm missing something in between. Someone should invent a singles forum where you can just hang out and chat
They have
They are called pubs"
Urgh  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like the idea of being chased but it's 2018 and I'm bold enough to say I'm interested!!
If it's too much effort I'd be put off to OP.
I don't mind taking the lead, showing I'm interested, paying the bills, and romancing a woman (I'm talking about dating now... I know you run a mile when I bring out my lovey dovey stuff Lady Lick ). It's more the whole idea of throwing myself at an unresponsive zombie until she finally accepts my advances... that's what I construe those who want to be chased are looking for. ?? "
perhaps the unresponsive zombies just aren't interested and you should just leave them alone? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like the idea of being chased but it's 2018 and I'm bold enough to say I'm interested!!
If it's too much effort I'd be put off to OP.
I don't mind taking the lead, showing I'm interested, paying the bills, and romancing a woman (I'm talking about dating now... I know you run a mile when I bring out my lovey dovey stuff Lady Lick ). It's more the whole idea of throwing myself at an unresponsive zombie until she finally accepts my advances... that's what I construe those who want to be chased are looking for. ??
perhaps the unresponsive zombies just aren't interested and you should just leave them alone?"
That can't be so!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone needs to chase me like that, it means I am not that into them. I understand that some like to be chased, but if a person doesn't seem that responsive, once effort has been made, I would see that as a red flag.... Plenty more people out there who don't expect a person to jump through hoops to spend time with them. The dynamic needs to be more equal, not one sided.
Thanks for this Mystiquexx. I feel exactly the same. You make me feel like I'm not completely naive in dating for being allergic to too much chasing. Thanks "
You're welcome lovely. When I'm talking and getting to know someone I like, I'm hoping they have the same silly grin on their face as I do, when a new message pops up. That excitement and anticipation of where it could lead. So it needs to feel like they are as invested as I am, in getting to know each other |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If someone needs to chase me like that, it means I am not that into them. I understand that some like to be chased, but if a person doesn't seem that responsive, once effort has been made, I would see that as a red flag.... Plenty more people out there who don't expect a person to jump through hoops to spend time with them. The dynamic needs to be more equal, not one sided.
Thanks for this Mystiquexx. I feel exactly the same. You make me feel like I'm not completely naive in dating for being allergic to too much chasing. Thanks
You're welcome lovely. When I'm talking and getting to know someone I like, I'm hoping they have the same silly grin on their face as I do, when a new message pops up. That excitement and anticipation of where it could lead. So it needs to feel like they are as invested as I am, in getting to know each other "
That's such a cute image Yeah that's exactly how I feel too. You can't fake that xx |
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"I'm open to learning from the players on here (so feel free to chip in guys if you're a chaser and know how to deal with these types)
But there is some serious high horse crap in the way some women think of themselves which is severely off putting. Maybe it's just Darwinian survival of the fittest in action. But quite frankly... if they want to mate with players and twats who think they're "alpha males"... if that's the kind of guy they want to attract... well they can fill their boots imo "
And of course if you are not their type they must be lesbians ,, right |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm open to learning from the players on here (so feel free to chip in guys if you're a chaser and know how to deal with these types)
But there is some serious high horse crap in the way some women think of themselves which is severely off putting. Maybe it's just Darwinian survival of the fittest in action. But quite frankly... if they want to mate with players and twats who think they're "alpha males"... if that's the kind of guy they want to attract... well they can fill their boots imo
And of course if you are not their type they must be lesbians ,, right "
You'd think wouldn't you. But every time I follow up a rejection by asking if I can watch them with their girlfriend I get blocked |
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"I'm open to learning from the players on here (so feel free to chip in guys if you're a chaser and know how to deal with these types)
But there is some serious high horse crap in the way some women think of themselves which is severely off putting. Maybe it's just Darwinian survival of the fittest in action. But quite frankly... if they want to mate with players and twats who think they're "alpha males"... if that's the kind of guy they want to attract... well they can fill their boots imo
And of course if you are not their type they must be lesbians ,, right
You'd think wouldn't you. But every time I follow up a rejection by asking if I can watch them with their girlfriend I get blocked "
You just can’t second guess this shit .... it’s a minefield of crushed egos and ball breakers  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If someone needs to chase me like that, it means I am not that into them. I understand that some like to be chased, but if a person doesn't seem that responsive, once effort has been made, I would see that as a red flag.... Plenty more people out there who don't expect a person to jump through hoops to spend time with them. The dynamic needs to be more equal, not one sided. "
Absolutely |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok. So the way this thread is going it seems like all those super super hot women who insist on guys chasing them simply don't ever get chased. Nah! I'm not buying that.
Come on you players lurking in the shadows. There's gotta be some players out there who chase these types of women. Give up your grandmaster secrets to this novice... pleeeease |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If she fancies you, you don't have to chase.
Stop chasing women who don't fancy you. They'll be plenty that do."
Well that's heartening to know as Mrs Spice is absolutely gorgeous So proves even at the top things can be mutual. The only problem now is that I have to book a course in photoshop to try and make me look half the man Mr Spice is |
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"How does that work? Are such women ever actually worth chasing? Or is this just an online thing done by messed up women seeking obsequious flattery?
Whether it's dating or fucking, having such a one-sided situation where the man is putting in all the effort, and the woman either accepts or deflects it, doesn't bode well. Surely?!?
I'm conflicted. On the one hand most of the women I'm attracted to clearly think I should be doing all the chasing. On the other, the mere fact that they think this is a bit off-putting. I'm looking for something mutual. "
I'm primal prey, end of. Anyone who wants me has to chase me - I never chase! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"How does that work? Are such women ever actually worth chasing? Or is this just an online thing done by messed up women seeking obsequious flattery?
Whether it's dating or fucking, having such a one-sided situation where the man is putting in all the effort, and the woman either accepts or deflects it, doesn't bode well. Surely?!?
I'm conflicted. On the one hand most of the women I'm attracted to clearly think I should be doing all the chasing. On the other, the mere fact that they think this is a bit off-putting. I'm looking for something mutual.
I'm primal prey, end of. Anyone who wants me has to chase me - I never chase! "
Flirt your curves. Bat your eyelids. Lower your head and sneak me a cheeky knowing smile. And give me one soft sensuous kiss and I'll chase  But I need to know my attention is wanted  |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
Its not about being chased more about how someone makes you feel if there is a mutual connection.
For me it always goes back to the same old feeling. Focus on one person at a time the problem is simple..to many hands in to many sweet jars, jumping from one to another all at the same time. Always being made to feel that you are only for a second important to someone until that next picture distracts them. We have become just a flick on a page......
This is dating btw |
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"If she fancies you, you don't have to chase.
Stop chasing women who don't fancy you. They'll be plenty that do."
That kinda falls down when - certainly when I was doing the online dating thing - some of them expressly said they enjoyed playing hard to get and being chased.
Now, from my point of view, that was fine; it told me that this was not the kind of person I’d find attractive or would want to be with*. But, it seems that SoulfulKinky maybe can’t resist the allure.
* I did, once or twice, have a go. Y’know, before I knew any better. They act aloof when you message, then complain that you’re not showing enough interest when you don’t. If there’s a magic solution to that, I don’t want to know what it is. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Its not about being chased more about how someone makes you feel if there is a mutual connection.
For me it always goes back to the same old feeling. Focus on one person at a time the problem is simple..to many hands in to many sweet jars, jumping from one to another all at the same time. Always being made to feel that you are only for a second important to someone until that next picture distracts them. We have become just a flick on a page......
This is dating btw "
Really good reply spiderwoman. I'm really starting to come round to this point of view. It's just confusing trying to decide who, in the crowd, is worth this effort. I guess that's what a first date is for. Until that, however, you still have to treat each individual as if they really stand out of the crowd. As I'm finding, that itself can involve a fair amount of work |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Find a cave
Set a trap
Put down bait...
But what happens if a wooly mammoth walks in? "
Then I have skins to keep me warm food to keep me strong and oil for a lamp.
And the man cave stays.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If she fancies you, you don't have to chase.
Stop chasing women who don't fancy you. They'll be plenty that do.
That kinda falls down when - certainly when I was doing the online dating thing - some of them expressly said they enjoyed playing hard to get and being chased.
Now, from my point of view, that was fine; it told me that this was not the kind of person I’d find attractive or would want to be with*. But, it seems that SoulfulKinky maybe can’t resist the allure.
* I did, once or twice, have a go. Y’know, before I knew any better. They act aloof when you message, then complain that you’re not showing enough interest when you don’t. If there’s a magic solution to that, I don’t want to know what it is."
Bingo Oatcake That's the kind of insight I was looking for. Kinda like wondering what's just over the hill. So far I've resisted bothering, assuming they'd get on my tits in no time by being so up themselves. But one can't help but wonder if the tune changes the minute you start to play their game a little. You know... a couple of glasses of bubbly and suddenly it's knickers around the ankles. Good to know that, at least in your case, it was just a waste of time. Pretty much as I suspected. Thanks |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
"Its not about being chased more about how someone makes you feel if there is a mutual connection.
For me it always goes back to the same old feeling. Focus on one person at a time the problem is simple..to many hands in to many sweet jars, jumping from one to another all at the same time. Always being made to feel that you are only for a second important to someone until that next picture distracts them. We have become just a flick on a page......
This is dating btw
Really good reply spiderwoman. I'm really starting to come round to this point of view. It's just confusing trying to decide who, in the crowd, is worth this effort. I guess that's what a first date is for. Until that, however, you still have to treat each individual as if they really stand out of the crowd. As I'm finding, that itself can involve a fair amount of work "
If someone treated me as if I wasnt just someone on a list of many then I would treat them as I would like to be treated but from my experience guys are so concerned about what they may be missing they dont see the simple things right in front of them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Its not about being chased more about how someone makes you feel if there is a mutual connection.
For me it always goes back to the same old feeling. Focus on one person at a time the problem is simple..to many hands in to many sweet jars, jumping from one to another all at the same time. Always being made to feel that you are only for a second important to someone until that next picture distracts them. We have become just a flick on a page......
This is dating btw
Really good reply spiderwoman. I'm really starting to come round to this point of view. It's just confusing trying to decide who, in the crowd, is worth this effort. I guess that's what a first date is for. Until that, however, you still have to treat each individual as if they really stand out of the crowd. As I'm finding, that itself can involve a fair amount of work
If someone treated me as if I wasnt just someone on a list of many then I would treat them as I would like to be treated but from my experience guys are so concerned about what they may be missing they dont see the simple things right in front of them. "
I certainly agree that whenever it's worked for me (both on here and on dating) it's been because we've both immediately expressed equal interest in meeting each other. There has to be an enthusiasm there to build on. From that it's really easy to get sucked into messaging someone and making her feel deliciously desired. But you really need to be in the mood and genuinely attracted too. I wish you weren't down in Plymouth... but there ya go that's life xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How does that work? Are such women ever actually worth chasing? Or is this just an online thing done by messed up women seeking obsequious flattery?
Whether it's dating or fucking, having such a one-sided situation where the man is putting in all the effort, and the woman either accepts or deflects it, doesn't bode well. Surely?!?
I'm conflicted. On the one hand most of the women I'm attracted to clearly think I should be doing all the chasing. On the other, the mere fact that they think this is a bit off-putting. I'm looking for something mutual. "
Are you asking whether it's appropriate in both a Fab and dating situation?
I think Fab is (or should be) a more equal experience while in dating you expect to chase at least a bit (otherwise you can't think the lady is worth it ...). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If she fancies you, you don't have to chase.
Stop chasing women who don't fancy you. They'll be plenty that do.
Well that's heartening to know as Mrs Spice is absolutely gorgeous So proves even at the top things can be mutual. The only problem now is that I have to book a course in photoshop to try and make me look half the man Mr Spice is "
Are you suggesting Mr Spice uses Photoshop OP?!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"How does that work? Are such women ever actually worth chasing? Or is this just an online thing done by messed up women seeking obsequious flattery?
Whether it's dating or fucking, having such a one-sided situation where the man is putting in all the effort, and the woman either accepts or deflects it, doesn't bode well. Surely?!?
I'm conflicted. On the one hand most of the women I'm attracted to clearly think I should be doing all the chasing. On the other, the mere fact that they think this is a bit off-putting. I'm looking for something mutual.
Are you asking whether it's appropriate in both a Fab and dating situation?
I think Fab is (or should be) a more equal experience while in dating you expect to chase at least a bit (otherwise you can't think the lady is worth it ...). "
Personally I'm interested in dating. But I have had experiences on here where it's clear I'm being expected to do all the leg work. I'm happy to chase to a degree. When you like a person this comes naturally.
I just see lots and lots of female profiles with just pics, no text, and the expectation that you will message them with some amazing opener about something other than their looks despite the fact that that's all they've given you to go on. It just feels so entitled and lazy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If she fancies you, you don't have to chase.
Stop chasing women who don't fancy you. They'll be plenty that do.
Well that's heartening to know as Mrs Spice is absolutely gorgeous So proves even at the top things can be mutual. The only problem now is that I have to book a course in photoshop to try and make me look half the man Mr Spice is
Are you suggesting Mr Spice uses Photoshop OP?!! "
Are you inferring he doesn't!! |
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Lets say that you put the time and effort into chasing this women, you started dating etc. Would you tell her you was into a swinging lifestyle or would you leave it all behind for a normal relationship?
Me personally i would have to tell her, i prefer to be honest and upfront and who knows she might also be into the same things or intrigued enough to give it a go. But if she wasnt into it i dont think it work out for me  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Lets say that you put the time and effort into chasing this women, you started dating etc. Would you tell her you was into a swinging lifestyle or would you leave it all behind for a normal relationship?
Me personally i would have to tell her, i prefer to be honest and upfront and who knows she might also be into the same things or intrigued enough to give it a go. But if she wasnt into it i dont think it work out for me "
Swinging is an optional activity for me... or at least it would be if anyone wanted to swing with me haha So I don't feel the pressing need to bring it up with my dates.
I've also found the other person sometimes leads the conversation in that direction. I was in the middle of fucking a date the other night when she volunteered the information that she'd like to have a cock in her mouth at the same time. Vanilla suddenly got very kinky and it was easy to lead on into a conversation about swinging |
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