FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Am I being unreasonable?
Am I being unreasonable?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Morning everyone 
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m in a similar situation and feel your pain! I’ve been on and off here for a few years. In the early days I used to do quite well, I met guys fairly regularly and most (but not all) social meets turned into play meets. For the last couple of years, I struggle to even arrange a social and I can’t remember the last time one of these turned into play. I’m a bit puzzled, because as far as I’m aware, I’m not doing anything particularly different. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all OP, you're being true to yourself and what you're looking for on here, and why should you compromise that? Just because this is a sex site, doesn't mean you can't be picky. In fact being in the position of a single lady on here, you're able to be picky with ease (not that I'm not, even if that does further limit my options).
You haven't said why you think those 5 socials didn't go any further i.e. did you rule them out, or the people you met do so? Either way that's exactly what a social is there for, to decide if you like the look of each other - again I wouldn't take too much from that other than they served their purpose and the people concerned weren't right for you.
Yes your profile is very specific, but there's nothing wrong with that at all - better to be clear about what you're looking for than be vague and add to the number of people you have to wade through. I actually liked how clear, open and honest it was 
I come back to my original point, stay true to yourself and what you want - just because you've not found someone you want to take things further with yet doesn't mean you won't. It's just a question of time and finding them - same as it is for anyone on the site, man or woman |
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Don’t think it’s unreasonable at all.
We like to chat to somebody before we play, get to know them and enjoy the build up. A social is always good and to be honest we find everything’s a lot more relaxed with no expectations on the first meeting.
We do find there’s a lot of fantasists on here, they start chatting and then drop off the site or turn out to be guys so that can be a bit annoying. But it seems unusual that your meets arent working out once you’ve got to know people, are you maybe compromising a bit and meeting people that you’re not that into and that’s what’s showing through?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive been on and off of here for a couple of years and like someone else said, when I first joined, I had lots of successful socials that usually got naughty but now it’s proving trickier. Again, I know what I want and my profile is quite specific so that will be an instant filter really.
I am just working on the assumption/hope that the right person will come along and wow me and until then I’ll keep looking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get blocked all the time for taking too long to meet but that's their loss as far as I'm concerned. I think what you're asking for is totally reasonable given the reasons behind it! And from what I can see of your public photos you look great xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for all your comments. I was worried that I was gonna get slated so that's a bonus!
Oh the socials were fine but I guess none of them were ones I were *that* keen on, so it just fizzled. Which I don't mind at all. Would rather everyone be happy and want to all join in.
The meets that I have had, are from either group events so there are more people to start off with, or we've met through friends etc.
Good to know I'm not the only one x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all OP, you're being true to yourself and what you're looking for on here, and why should you compromise that? Just because this is a sex site, doesn't mean you can't be picky. In fact being in the position of a single lady on here, you're able to be picky with ease (not that I'm not, even if that does further limit my options).
You haven't said why you think those 5 socials didn't go any further i.e. did you rule them out, or the people you met do so? Either way that's exactly what a social is there for, to decide if you like the look of each other - again I wouldn't take too much from that other than they served their purpose and the people concerned weren't right for you.
Yes your profile is very specific, but there's nothing wrong with that at all - better to be clear about what you're looking for than be vague and add to the number of people you have to wade through. I actually liked how clear, open and honest it was
I come back to my original point, stay true to yourself and what you want - just because you've not found someone you want to take things further with yet doesn't mean you won't. It's just a question of time and finding them - same as it is for anyone on the site, man or woman "
Thanks so much I don't think I'm expecting too much and I've changed my profile to reflect the experiences I've had. I don't think it's a lot to ask someone to not send a dick pic, send a face photo, read my profile and meet me BEFORE we actually have sex lol. I make exceptions for couples and single ladies, but the single guys are generally rubbish about actually meeting up hehe.
Oh, and don't get me started on not being able to accommodate  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all OP, you're being true to yourself and what you're looking for on here, and why should you compromise that? Just because this is a sex site, doesn't mean you can't be picky. In fact being in the position of a single lady on here, you're able to be picky with ease (not that I'm not, even if that does further limit my options).
You haven't said why you think those 5 socials didn't go any further i.e. did you rule them out, or the people you met do so? Either way that's exactly what a social is there for, to decide if you like the look of each other - again I wouldn't take too much from that other than they served their purpose and the people concerned weren't right for you.
Yes your profile is very specific, but there's nothing wrong with that at all - better to be clear about what you're looking for than be vague and add to the number of people you have to wade through. I actually liked how clear, open and honest it was
I come back to my original point, stay true to yourself and what you want - just because you've not found someone you want to take things further with yet doesn't mean you won't. It's just a question of time and finding them - same as it is for anyone on the site, man or woman
Thanks so much I don't think I'm expecting too much and I've changed my profile to reflect the experiences I've had. I don't think it's a lot to ask someone to not send a dick pic, send a face photo, read my profile and meet me BEFORE we actually have sex lol. I make exceptions for couples and single ladies, but the single guys are generally rubbish about actually meeting up hehe.
Oh, and don't get me started on not being able to accommodate "
So you wouldn’t need a social with women or couples hmmmm
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all your comments. I was worried that I was gonna get slated so that's a bonus!
Oh the socials were fine but I guess none of them were ones I were *that* keen on, so it just fizzled. Which I don't mind at all. Would rather everyone be happy and want to all join in.
The meets that I have had, are from either group events so there are more people to start off with, or we've met through friends etc.
Good to know I'm not the only one x"
Is the issue that people won't have socials? Or they send dick pics? Or you don't fancy them? Or they don't fancy you? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all OP, you're being true to yourself and what you're looking for on here, and why should you compromise that? Just because this is a sex site, doesn't mean you can't be picky. In fact being in the position of a single lady on here, you're able to be picky with ease (not that I'm not, even if that does further limit my options).
You haven't said why you think those 5 socials didn't go any further i.e. did you rule them out, or the people you met do so? Either way that's exactly what a social is there for, to decide if you like the look of each other - again I wouldn't take too much from that other than they served their purpose and the people concerned weren't right for you.
Yes your profile is very specific, but there's nothing wrong with that at all - better to be clear about what you're looking for than be vague and add to the number of people you have to wade through. I actually liked how clear, open and honest it was
I come back to my original point, stay true to yourself and what you want - just because you've not found someone you want to take things further with yet doesn't mean you won't. It's just a question of time and finding them - same as it is for anyone on the site, man or woman
Thanks so much I don't think I'm expecting too much and I've changed my profile to reflect the experiences I've had. I don't think it's a lot to ask someone to not send a dick pic, send a face photo, read my profile and meet me BEFORE we actually have sex lol. I make exceptions for couples and single ladies, but the single guys are generally rubbish about actually meeting up hehe.
Oh, and don't get me started on not being able to accommodate
So you wouldn’t need a social with women or couples hmmmm
"
Sorry no, I meant I was more flexible in accepting messages from ladies and couples. I always have socials with everyone. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all your comments. I was worried that I was gonna get slated so that's a bonus!
Oh the socials were fine but I guess none of them were ones I were *that* keen on, so it just fizzled. Which I don't mind at all. Would rather everyone be happy and want to all join in.
The meets that I have had, are from either group events so there are more people to start off with, or we've met through friends etc.
Good to know I'm not the only one x
Is the issue that people won't have socials? Or they send dick pics? Or you don't fancy them? Or they don't fancy you? "
I don't generally reply to dick pics or people I don't fancy. If I get chatting to someone and then seem ok, then we'll exchange numbers, with the aim of chatting more easily and arranging a social. Then we never seem to get a social planned and things just fizzle lol.
Even if I was having one social a week, that would be something! Lol. As you can see from my profile, I'm restricted on when I can meet up anyway, so reluctance to meet for a social doesnt fill me with confidence that they'd be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all your comments. I was worried that I was gonna get slated so that's a bonus!
Oh the socials were fine but I guess none of them were ones I were *that* keen on, so it just fizzled. Which I don't mind at all. Would rather everyone be happy and want to all join in.
The meets that I have had, are from either group events so there are more people to start off with, or we've met through friends etc.
Good to know I'm not the only one x
Is the issue that people won't have socials? Or they send dick pics? Or you don't fancy them? Or they don't fancy you?
I don't generally reply to dick pics or people I don't fancy. If I get chatting to someone and then seem ok, then we'll exchange numbers, with the aim of chatting more easily and arranging a social. Then we never seem to get a social planned and things just fizzle lol.
Even if I was having one social a week, that would be something! Lol. As you can see from my profile, I'm restricted on when I can meet up anyway, so reluctance to meet for a social doesnt fill me with confidence that they'd be"
They might see your heart isn't really in it and stop bothering. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I think the "fizzling" you describe is only natural OP - it's no different from the real world in that respect - some people are just fleeting connections that you chat to for a brief period and nothing comes of it. Others you find a connection with and the conversation just flows naturally and without awkwardness or uncertainty what to say next.
I've chatted to many people here that fall into both categories and the ones where the conversation flows effortlessly are the ones that we then move on to potentially discussing meeting.
Or realise we may not be attracted to one another sexually but still enjoy swapping messages - which again is no different from forging a friendship in the "real world". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all your comments. I was worried that I was gonna get slated so that's a bonus!
Oh the socials were fine but I guess none of them were ones I were *that* keen on, so it just fizzled. Which I don't mind at all. Would rather everyone be happy and want to all join in.
The meets that I have had, are from either group events so there are more people to start off with, or we've met through friends etc.
Good to know I'm not the only one x
Is the issue that people won't have socials? Or they send dick pics? Or you don't fancy them? Or they don't fancy you?
I don't generally reply to dick pics or people I don't fancy. If I get chatting to someone and then seem ok, then we'll exchange numbers, with the aim of chatting more easily and arranging a social. Then we never seem to get a social planned and things just fizzle lol.
Even if I was having one social a week, that would be something! Lol. As you can see from my profile, I'm restricted on when I can meet up anyway, so reluctance to meet for a social doesnt fill me with confidence that they'd be"
I agree if they won't meet for a social they won't meet at all. Easy to avoid them.
There can be 200,000 people on a site but if you don't fancy each other there's nothing you can do.
Or 200,000 men might fancy you but if they all have dick profile pics......
If you're having sex with other people why keep looking for more? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all OP, you're being true to yourself and what you're looking for on here, and why should you compromise that? Just because this is a sex site, doesn't mean you can't be picky. In fact being in the position of a single lady on here, you're able to be picky with ease (not that I'm not, even if that does further limit my options).
You haven't said why you think those 5 socials didn't go any further i.e. did you rule them out, or the people you met do so? Either way that's exactly what a social is there for, to decide if you like the look of each other - again I wouldn't take too much from that other than they served their purpose and the people concerned weren't right for you.
Yes your profile is very specific, but there's nothing wrong with that at all - better to be clear about what you're looking for than be vague and add to the number of people you have to wade through. I actually liked how clear, open and honest it was
I come back to my original point, stay true to yourself and what you want - just because you've not found someone you want to take things further with yet doesn't mean you won't. It's just a question of time and finding them - same as it is for anyone on the site, man or woman
Thanks so much I don't think I'm expecting too much and I've changed my profile to reflect the experiences I've had. I don't think it's a lot to ask someone to not send a dick pic, send a face photo, read my profile and meet me BEFORE we actually have sex lol. I make exceptions for couples and single ladies, but the single guys are generally rubbish about actually meeting up hehe.
Oh, and don't get me started on not being able to accommodate
So you wouldn’t need a social with women or couples hmmmm
Sorry no, I meant I was more flexible in accepting messages from ladies and couples. I always have socials with everyone. "
Ahhi get it now |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
There nothing wrong with being picky and knowing what you want. You just have to be realistic and know that it's pretty unlikely that'll you'll find many guys that tick your boxes on here. The longer you're on here to you kind of exhaust the local guys so have to hope for some new ones to join or look further afield. Well I do anyway. |
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Hi op
The biggest problem is that people just don't read profiles...
There's nothing wrong with a social ,we always have one and I do on my single profile too.
I find many just don't want to meet for a drink without a promise of anything more and that's fine,I just wouldn't meet them.
I rarely meet on my single profile as it's not often I find someone who I click with and am attracted to anymore .
Miss |
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By *ddibleMan
over a year ago
Exeter Bristol Salisbury |
When I was part of a couple the biggest problem we came across was single men pretending to be a couple. Not sure if that still goes on, but as a single I've come across a lot of single men pretending to be single women. You can actually spot then by the way they write so never had a problem with that
I have a lot of single women friends (a lot I've never met) who have shared a lot of their experiences:- firstly: a lot of guys think that because you are on here pretty much guarantees them a sexy time, and a lot the mutual respect you would accept in any other social situation doesn't need to apply.
Secondly it's just the thought of meeting with you that's enough to fuel the mental imagery for their next wank, and once they've cum the notion is gone and on goes the tv with out any further thought about you. We've all come across "user no longer on site"
Thankfully not all guys on here are like that, but let's face it, if you going to fake a profile you're going to make it look as good as you can including pictures.
What I've learnt to accept is that a lot of guys have as much insecurities as woman- am I too short, too fat, is my cock big enough, what if I cum too soon. I've never gone looking for single guys but I did initially look at their profiles for tips on ways to improve my own and there isn't that much that separates the men from the women.
So you're not being unreasonable but you have been very unlucky, I liked your profile, and you're someone I'd happily message, so stick to your guns and you will find someone who fits what you are looking for
Good luck beautiful lady
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Aw thanks everyone!
I don't want to come across as a moaning Minny, cause I'm really not. I was just wondering if I was being stupid.
Obviously not, people are just willing to do different things.
Thanks x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've found the longer we've been on here the harder it seems to get a meet even if it's just a social.
For us its probably a combination of some of the reasons already mentioned as in exhausting the locals by either chatting or meeting most of them them and ruling each other out one by one.
Added to that the more should I say unsuccessful meets tend to make us feel like the next meet will be no different from the last and can find ourselves feeling un excited and probably somewhat negative before we even leave the house!
Then you get the people that like like to chat about nothing but sex and how they want to do this and that which is fine if they genuinely intend to meet but as there are so many people that just want to chat so they can have a wank it starts to put us off and we tend to assume that they are just looking for something to wank to and it kills the conversation.
I wouldn't say we are looking for the impossible but I guess on looks alone 50% of people we can rule out or they have ruled us out then another 30% of people we can rule out because of the content of the messages/responses we get that then leaves 20% out of which 10% are fake profiles and another 9% we've met already and didn't click which leaves us with the 1% which could be what we're looking for but haven't found each other yet
So to sum it up your not alone haha
Mr |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"
I wouldn't say we are looking for the impossible but I guess on looks alone 50% of people we can rule out or they have ruled us out then another 30% of people we can rule out because of the content of the messages/responses we get that then leaves 20% out of which 10% are fake profiles and another 9% we've met already and didn't click which leaves us with the 1% which could be what we're looking for but haven't found each other yet
So to sum it up your not alone haha
Mr"
Yes I think that sums it up for me to.
Might as well fuck off!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your not doing anything wrong. You sound similar to me in your requirements apart from I don't meet couples. I'm a right awkward bitch but I tell those that intrest me from the start what to expect. Those that I see I chat the ear off first for ages and I've met some amazing people doing it my way. Keep doing it the way you want and you will hit jackpot |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a single male and I would always want to meet for a social first. Apart from the safety aspect, I'd rather find out if we get on and fancy each other rather than turn up to a play meet and find we don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I think that sums it up for me to.
Might as well fuck off!!! "
Well to be fair we've said the same but for now we live in hope
One thing I can add though is that we have attended the odd social gathering and we've met people who we can have a good chat and a laugh with in person but when they've messaged us on here it's like pulling teeth! So we're probably unfair to write people off because of short and sometimes illiterate hard to read messages because in person they could be absolutely fine but it's just hard not to as it would be like playing fab meet lottery! |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
Our advice would be to try clubs. They're social, they give you the chance to see what people are like (and they you) before committing to play, the sex is casual without commitment and no shows aren't a problem. You can then use fab to stay in touch with the people you have met. It works very well for us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Could just be that you've grown weary of it all. In that frame of mind no one will excite you. "
I think this is a common problem. That and the onset of cynical lethargy amongst those who've been on this site for a while |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
I don’t think meeting for a social is unreasonable in anyway. If people aren’t happy with that then they’re probably not people you’d want to meet |
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"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this.
Our advice would be to try clubs. They're social, they give you the chance to see what people are like (and they you) before committing to play, the sex is casual without commitment and no shows aren't a problem. You can then use fab to stay in touch with the people you have met. It works very well for us"
We would agree with this 100% |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Could just be that you've grown weary of it all. In that frame of mind no one will excite you.
I think this is a common problem. That and the onset of cynical lethargy amongst those who've been on this site for a while "
CynicalLethargy should be my new profile name. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
How strange, I cannot understand why you can't get a meet. If you'd been a single guy then that's standard practice ... but you're not a single guy, and I don't have an answer to your question I'm afraid .. |
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"Having a high standards and criteria might gets you exactly what you want, but at the same time it limits your options.
"
I see where you're coming from, but it doesn't limit options as such because the people who don't meet the standards set would never be considered an option.
We don't need to do this. It's a bit of added fun in a VERY happy marriage. Wifey is extremely picky (she can afford to be because she's amazing) and she's not going to go with a guy that she doesn't think is a hottie just to have a threesome.
If it takes longer, it takes longer. We ain't in a rush and we ain't desperate. |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
Of course your not
keep doing what you are doing
you just have standards and you need to click with people and have a bit of chemistry. |
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By *azielMan
over a year ago
Midlands |
No not at all. Nothing wrong in being weary and it just adds to the attraction in a lot of cases. Personally i struggle to even get a reply to messages so your doing something right. Keep it up and hang in there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. Personally, I don't even offer a social. I'll meet in a club environment initially and like someone mentioned above, a no show at a club won't bother me. |
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By *oobs1Woman
over a year ago
Sussex |
As for too fat and ugly, that’s just ridiculous. I am a BBW and I have no end of attention. Some are more believable than others. I am not keen on socials, if I have spent time getting to know someone on here and I do mean time, then I’m a kinda of a meet and fuck gal. If the banter and chat is not flowing in here or they become pest like, then we will not move forward from that x |
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I’m very picky and find it really difficult to connect with people we message and even when we have socials most of them don’t come to anything more. There just seems to be that lack of excitement when I look at the single male profiles and couples profiles are just as bad. There never seems to be any men I think yeah I want to have sex with them just pictures of the female half of the couple.
As I’ve said on another thread this site used to be great for finding sexy guys that excited me but now I’m finding I’m using dating apps as they are much easier to find a guy I like . |
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By *azielMan
over a year ago
Midlands |
Im sorry i had to go back and re read your original post. I think your absolutely stunning and my god what pair of legs you have. Seriously you look great, im being a total hypocrite but dont doubt yourself. Stay sexy |
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A social first to see if you get on and are attracted to each other is a standard requirement I think.
I'd hate to turn up at some women's house without a social first and have them not fancy me (unlikely I know ) and then either a. feel obliged to do the deed or b. tell me to sling my hook.
Better to meet up first and see if you both want to go further. |
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"A social first to see if you get on and are attracted to each other is a standard requirement I think.
I'd hate to turn up at some women's house without a social first and have them not fancy me (unlikely I know ) and then either a. feel obliged to do the deed or b. tell me to sling my hook.
Better to meet up first and see if you both want to go further."
Even though I do be dead nervous on a pre-match social. I feel like I'm on a job interview. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Could just be that you've grown weary of it all. In that frame of mind no one will excite you.
I think this is a common problem. That and the onset of cynical lethargy amongst those who've been on this site for a while
CynicalLethargy should be my new profile name. "
With the tag line "fuck me if you want to, but I bet you don't" |
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By *ophleeCouple
over a year ago
Fareham |
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
Nice to hear people similar to Us, our answer is quite simple, if they don't like the way you work then it's their loss. Good luck and don't change, stay true to who you are |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
Fancy a fuck |
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By *os19Man
over a year ago
Edmonton |
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
. You are not been unreasonable in wanting a social first before deciding if you want to take things further.I am guessing but the ratio of single guys to single women is probably 20 guys to 1 lady so yes you can be picky with that sort of ratio why not.Looking at your public pictures and profile you are not fat and ugly you have been very honest in what you like and want and that is a good thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
You are absolutely right to put your safety and security first. There seems to be too many people who consider women on FAB to be insta shags,always at their convenience and for their pleasure. No doubt the majority of those would not do anyone any harm but you can never know until it's too late.
It makes perfect sense to want to be sure a prospective is at least slightly concerned for your interests as well as their own.
If that means being picky and going without then,so be it. Better than some of the possible alternatives. |
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"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
Im a single fem and Ive had a few scary times either meeting at home or away from home. I came to the decision that to be and feel safe it would be best to join a club which I did and was the best thing ever. The staff really keep an eye open for you to make sure you are ok. Being at a club you can arrange to meet couples or single guys there. If they don't float your boat then nothing is lost as you could easily enjoy yourself with others. I had butterflies first time I ever went to a club but more times I went and got to know regulars there then I find it a very nice social place to be and nothing to worry about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m in a similar situation and feel your pain! I’ve been on and off here for a few years. In the early days I used to do quite well, I met guys fairly regularly and most (but not all) social meets turned into play meets. For the last couple of years, I struggle to even arrange a social and I can’t remember the last time one of these turned into play. I’m a bit puzzled, because as far as I’m aware, I’m not doing anything particularly different. "
I just looked at your profile and I'm wondering if it was the same as it was when you first started on here.
I only say that because of what you're looking for. I don't know how many guys would be into the whole CFNM thing, but with this site having such a wide range of people with various likes and dislikes, I can't see why you'd struggle to get a meet.
It probably doesn't mean anything coming from me, but I like pictures and your profile is pretty intriguing. If I fit the bill of the type of guy you're looking for I would have messaged you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Absolutely not unreasonable!!!..... stick to what you want and don’t change it for anyone. If they can’t comply with that and pressure you otherwise maybe they’re not worth meeting anyway?!!!
But can I just say also...... try not to get upset for not connecting with many people.... don’t look at yourself and break yourself down negatively if you feel you’ve presented yourself in a way your happy with.
There are many shallow people on Fab and they way I think about those I don’t connect with is that’s cool, there are many I don’t find attractive, that’s just normal human instincts......but for those that push boundaries, are rude, try and change tactics you’ve go guy of to keep yourself safe..... why would you want them around you anyway?!!! They’ve already presented themselves in a negative light so why allow yourself to feel upset about that?....  xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I've decided to look into this as a viable option!
DareTo is my local club, in Bristol, and I'm gonna grab myself a membership and get down there whenever I can. Might be a little bit more expensive BUT I would feel much safer, prefer group sex anyway, and it's a great chance to have a social life
xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I wouldn't say I'm upset as such. Just wondering if I was doing something wrong.
I guess I feel that I'm quite clear and open, I expect others to be the same, but that isn't the case - which is fine! Everyone needs to be themselves |
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By *eep.Man
over a year ago
Just a background character |
I'm not surprised you're having problems getting meets having read your profile.
For starters do you really need a checklist of what you will and won't do, when you already state social meet first? You can list in your interests what you are into. Sorry to be brutally honest. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm not surprised you're having problems getting meets having read your profile.
For starters do you really need a checklist of what you will and won't do, when you already state social meet first? You can list in your interests what you are into. Sorry to be brutally honest."
Ah said by someone who doesn't get 98723987492 messages a day asking the same old shit lol...
I don't have any problems getting people interested and receiving messages just getting people from messages - socials lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Morning everyone
As a single gal, I always like to meet up for a social with couples or single guys who would like to hook up. I've had a few scary times in the past which have led to me not accommodating and being VERY firm on socials first.
Everyone, and his mother, says they can't get laid on this site, but I really don't think I'm asking for too much??
Just read my profile (which I've recently changed to be VERY specific).
Then message me.
Then let's chat for a couple days.
Then let's arrange a social and see where we go from there.
I have probably talked to 2836382622 guys and couples over the last few years.
Number of socials in total: 5 max
Number of those I then slept with: 0
- - - - - -
Am I expecting too much??
I don't wanna date anyone, don't want a relationship, probably come across as a bit picky (but I kind of can be - sorry if any offense caused!) And I'm not, in any way, sex-deprived.
I'm just wondering why nothing ever comes of anything? Maybe I'm just too fat and ugly for people to meet up with?! ????
Would love some interesting debate on this. "
We would quite happily meet you, can’t understand what seems to be going wrong for you? |
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