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Couples, how did you decide to give swinging a go.
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We have had the chat, we’ve had the role playing, we’ve joined this site (obviously), we’ve had a social meet, we’ve even visited a club but we are still unsure about making the final step and making fantasies into reality. How did you all start and did the fantasy match the reality? Did you have any regrets after that first swap? |
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We talked it through A LOT. Then arranged a meet with a single guy and just did it. We went into it with the attitude that whatever happened during that meet would be a learning experience, we wouldn't place blame for any negative feelings, we would discuss anything that made us feel uncomfortable and boundaries that needed to be put in place or reviewed.
For me (f) some of the experiences we've had have been better than the fantasy and others haven't lived up to it.
The thing is there isn't a deadline, you don't have to do anything until you're ready.  |
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We’ve always been honest and discussed everything with each other, the good with the bad.
We both wanted to try new experiences and something we both discussed before. We took the plunge and have never looked back. We were nervous but never felt so amazing after.
Natalie xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (Mr) had tried swinging in a previous relationship and everyone who knew us knew this. When I met Mrs B I didn't want her to hear this from someone else, so I sat her down and confessed to her my "dirty little secret".
To my surprise she was very intrigued and started to bombard me with questions on how we had met other swingers! I pulled the lappy out and showed her a few websites I knew about and to my surprise she demanded that we become a member! One week later we met our first couple for a social and two weeks later we met them for play! Mrs B took to it like a duck to water and I'm still shell shocked 7 years later!!
D |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We’ve always had an incredible sex life between us, we went away for a weekend and came across a club by pure chance.
After discussing what we were comfortable with, we decided that we’d just like to watch others and have sex in the same room as others - this then turned the Fem into thinking about other women and that’s where we’re at. The fem plays with other fem’s and really loves it, we don’t swap at all though - not even soft as we’re just not comfortable with the thought of each other touching someone else at the moment. It might never change but we won’t rule anything out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was always in the wank bank. We played 20 questions on text one day and I asked a few questions about swinging. Sort of went from there. We have been to 2 clubs. Not swung yet but each time we have been we have pushed boundaries a bit more. So maybe next meet we will swing. X |
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By *offee with MilkCouple
over a year ago
Over the roundabout and then turn right. |
We discussed it and decided to give a club a try. No pressure. If either of us felt uncomfortable we would leave. After extensive internet research we decided on Chameleons. The people there were so relaxed and friendly and we were made to feel welcome.
Surprisingly after our first play there was no jealousy or any other negative emotions, we think perhaps because there was also no deception.
We did have a day or so before we spoke about it again though. Then we admitted to each other that we had enjoyed ourselves.
So began our adventure. |
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"We have had the chat, we’ve had the role playing, we’ve joined this site (obviously), we’ve had a social meet, we’ve even visited a club but we are still unsure about making the final step and making fantasies into reality. How did you all start and did the fantasy match the reality? Did you have any regrets after that first swap?"
We’re new ourselves. It was something that was on our mind so we spontaneously attended a social. Loved the atmosphere & the people.
Started chatting to a couple recently but it’s made us realise that socials are where we’d prefer to meet people.
It’s easier, you’ll know if there’s attraction immediately, you can swing, then go home as per normal.
We’re yet to do this but have booked a few socials over next coming months! |
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We actually met on here - never the original intent! - so perhaps starting from a different position than most. We both had a little experience rather than lots.
Key for us is talking and reassurance, and then making sure we have time after for it to be just us - i.e. Not straight into normal routine without having hugged, and kissed and disected it. We've had a couple of, umm, odd meets that we can now laugh about ( I practically do a full stand up routine on one of them!) but our approach is what brought us together even more.
Hmm |
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By *hyntravCouple
over a year ago
North Somerset |
Lots of talking and making sure we were both in the same place. Boundaries and trust is the main thing. We started slow to make sure we were both comfortable and slowly moved the boundaries. We then stopped to have children and now we're back our boundaries are even more relaxed as we know we can enjoy it all and it doesn't have any affect on our relationship. It's something we enjoy together as an added excitement rather than something we have to have.
Some meets have been surprisingly fabulous while others have been a disappointment. Just have to keep trying lol x |
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Lots of great advice and it’s great hearing about how everyone else started. How can something be so exciting and so naughty, so thrilling yet so nerve wracking but give you so many potential doubts about what you are doing at the same time? |
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For us. We had chatted about fantasies for a long time and decided that IF we wanted to make them a reality, then swinging clubs were the easiest way.
We read a lot of club websites, forums, and even a couple if books written by the owner of La Chambre in Sheffield before finally deciding to give a club a try.
As for actually "taking the next step" then we had already decided that we were happy to go with the flow and see what happened, on the understanding that if one of us wasn't happy & comfortable then we would stop and leave... we certainly didn't need to leave 
Cal |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
It's difficult question as people and relationships are so diverse. For us, since we met have done everything together, never go out separate as we enjoy each others company so much, soul mates and best friends as well as married. For us it was all about Mrs F,s Bi side. We decided to meet a couple and if it wasn't for us walk away from the scene. We are strong enough for such an experience and not be upset if we didn't like it, a new experience in life we would have put it down to. Well we have been blown away by how honest and brilliant folk are in this lifestyle and we've never looked back. Before we played we asked each other how much a scenario would turn each other on with a scale of 1 to 10, this gave us an insight of what we would be comfortable with as it's so dawnting and nerve racking in the beginning.. Once you have took the plunge it is so liberating and boy so exciting. Enjoy your journey and communicate even if it's to discuss difficult feelings and never get talked into doing anything you don't want to do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We got involved because Rose wanted to be with a woman. We tried a few sites first to get talking to women, rose even tried Tinder!
Eventually we decided to through caution to the wind and went to a club.
First time there we hung around in the bar with the intention of not playing. We wanted to see what type of people went and ask questions etc.
We went back a week later and rose found a woman she liked and got talking to the couple. Eventually they went to a room on their own and me and the chap stayed back and had a talk in the bar.
The club soon closed so we agreed to meet them at their house a week later and the rest, as they say is history. |
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