FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > " Thanks but your not for us "
" Thanks but your not for us "
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By *otswaps OP Couple
over a year ago
Medway |
I understand in this world you have to kind of fancy the other person that you may play with but at times it is predictable as to weather you get the response "thanks but no thanks"
It is the same for us aswell as we have said it too but if a good looking couple message us we can guarantee we get the response!!
It's bad but it seems like only good looking people will only meet good looking people!!
Let's see if I'm wrong xx |
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In a one on one, you just need to fancy each other, but for couples you’re looking for both of you to like the look of both of them, and vice versa. Even if you’re not bi, I imagine you need to be comfortable with how the other partner looks. |
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By *otswaps OP Couple
over a year ago
Medway |
"So are you saying good-looking people should meet people they don't think are good looking?
That’s what I was getting the impression of as well?!  "
No not at all.
Everyone obviously have the right to meet whoever they want and no I'm not angry, just stating a fact. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding! |
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By *D835Man
over a year ago
London |
"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
Good point  |
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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
So true! It only occurred to us lately that our meets are not with guys who have the best physiques but what the veris have said, we've met guys who have seriously earnt their reputation here over the years. Spending time understanding what fab is all about is time well spent and shows in meets, living in the gym and grooming parlours maybe not so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
Hear hear. I prefer to judge someone on their personality rather than looks. |
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
Hear hear. I prefer to judge someone on their personality rather than looks. "
I rather have a good looking man with the personality! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For us looks really are not that Important. We would much rather meet a couple or someone who we get with first before getting into the more naughty side of things.
“No click! No lick!” |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
Hear hear. I prefer to judge someone on their personality rather than looks. "
I tend to judge them on both |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand in this world you have to kind of fancy the other person that you may play with but at times it is predictable as to weather you get the response "thanks but no thanks"
It is the same for us aswell as we have said it too but if a good looking couple message us we can guarantee we get the response!!
It's bad but it seems like only good looking people will only meet good looking people!!
Let's see if I'm wrong xx "
People meet us, we’re an ugly pair of fookers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, let's face it most up of us are here to fuck other people and have sexy fun, that's what it's all about isn't it, but I know what you mean, some people just go over the top and expect mr or Mrs world are the only ones good enough for them, well each to there own, us! We just love the good friendship and same mind set swinging brings, we have our own choices but never about looks, we have a saying, we want to fuck you not marry you. But somtimes you have to wonder, is there a chance your man or woman will run off with these beautiful people!! Lol |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
Surely all of us only meet people we find attractive. Are you saying we should meet everybody and anybody who asks us. If that is true why do you not meet single guys and people over 50? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely all of us only meet people we find attractive. Are you saying we should meet everybody and anybody who asks us. If that is true why do you not meet single guys and people over 50?"
Each to there own I say xx |
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Not fab but next time you're out and about take a look at couples in the streets, pubs etc
Proves that not every good looking woman only goes for a handsome guy(this is the same the other way around)
However I guess on fab that if women have a choice of a good looking guy with personality or average with personality the looker will be the choice as it's just sex not marriage they're after and fair play to them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To us a full blown orgy is swinging and having the best sexy fun ever, if your all together in a group cocks, tits, pussys, legs, everywhere who gives a shit who's on the end of them lol. If your that horny at that moment you will take it lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand in this world you have to kind of fancy the other person that you may play with but at times it is predictable as to weather you get the response "thanks but no thanks"
It is the same for us aswell as we have said it too but if a good looking couple message us we can guarantee we get the response!!
It's bad but it seems like only good looking people will only meet good looking people!!
Let's see if I'm wrong xx "
If that were true I wouldn't meet anyone... I'm just about average (in all departments) and have met people that I thought were way above my class.... but turns out they meet 'regular' guys too.
We're not all models.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
Definitely agree that i wouldn't arrange to meet somebody bases purely on their looks as personality is a massive part of the attraction for me. However, there has to be a line somewhere. Unfortunately I've spoken to lots of really great guys but looks wise I just don't find then attractive. It's incredibly frustrating for everyone concerned but you can't/shouldn't force yourself to sleep with somebody just because they're good people. This does mean though that 4 years in and I still haven't found entirely the right person for me! Met somebody really great people but still haven't found the magic combination where I find them physically attractive, mentally stimulating and there's sexual chemistry there with sexual compatibility. I've managed to find so many who tick one or two boxes but not all of them. I think it's likely that those very guys I'm looking for wouldn't find that I tick all of their boxes and so we're back at square one! |
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By *hingy2Woman
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Good looking is subjective. People will only meet people they're attracted to. "
Attraction is the key...whether they're average looks/build or good looking/fit if the mannerisms aren't there or you're not feeling it then there's no point |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
We swing to satisfy our sexual fantasies so we naturally gravitate to people we find attractive and/or sexy to play with in clubs. Personality is far less of an issue for brief sexual encounters, although if we do connect at that level we will probably play together again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I once messaged a particularly lovely lady who was top of the most-fabbed list and was local to my area.
To my surprise, she replied, we chatted and met up for a social. After that we had regular meets for months, clubs, private meets, socials, everything you can imagine until she moved away from the area. We're still in touch.
Now, I'm pretty far removed from a label of conventional perceived attractiveness, but yet she regularly said it was my mind and behaviour that made her want me, despite not having a chiseled 6pac or Ryan Reynolds-esqe looks!
All I'm trying to say is that maybe assumptions about how 'attractive' you should be in someone's eyes are the first mistake.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t meet people just because they’re good looking, they can be drop dead gorgeous and send wanna fuck message or crap profile and I won’t even respond. However, I only talk to those I find attractive initially to find out whether I like their personality, if I do I’ll meet if I don’t I won’t. So although it is subject to personality I’d never look at an ugly guy and think to myself, I’ll chat to him to see if he has a nice personality!!
So I only meet people I find attractive.
**real world is different I could become attracted to someone through their personality |
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
Good point "
That’s why I only play in clubs & not through arranged fab meets. You meet someone face to face, you click, there’s banter or rapport ... sex is much better with someone you connect with like that than from a few pics & a profile! |
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
Good point
That’s why I only play in clubs & not through arranged fab meets. You meet someone face to face, you click, there’s banter or rapport ... sex is much better with someone you connect with like that than from a few pics & a profile! "
Exactly we're are the same. Can't beat social & bar banter - go with the flow for us  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
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Horse for course .... we all have our own agenda’s and reasons why we are here!
For me .... I have to have a physical attraction to the folk I’m meeting regardless how big their Cock is it how many abs they have ... it’s who’s attached to the Cock that interests me. ... with regards to personality ... I’m not here to make friends I’ve got enough outside of Fab (but granted regular meets that comes) but call me shallow it’s 80% looks and 20% personality .... I’m here for great sex ... not for the banter ... but like I said we are all here for our reasons ...  JoJo x |
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For us anyway, we have to both be 100% attracted to the couple and vice versa.
Attraction is the key, why would you want to get sensual with somebody you didn’t find attractive.
I’m no oil painting but we do give out no thanks and also quite a few back, par for the course.
We never take offence, most of the couples we say no to are fine. It’s normal.
x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personality definitely counts for a lot when meeting someone and can add to the whole experience, but no one will meet with someone who they don't find attractive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
So true! It only occurred to us lately that our meets are not with guys who have the best physiques but what the veris have said, we've met guys who have seriously earnt their reputation here over the years. Spending time understanding what fab is all about is time well spent and shows in meets, living in the gym and grooming parlours maybe not so. "
I can see it varying to be fair. Obviously everyone wants to meets someone who is perfect for them, be it in body, looks, mind, intellect, technique, outlook, sense of adventure and appetite for mischief, and age whose likes match theirs? And the practical side of course; is available to meet when they are, is nearby, etc, etc. Though satisfying all those requirements would leave the list of potential playmates pretty thin on the ground ha!
So most compromise on one or two of these until their idea of perfection appears, no one in their right mind is going to abstain from sex for months or years on end in the hope perfection is going to come along.
I notice a few potential trends with women for example. Though a meet must still be reasonably attractive to them they as a rule tend to prioritise the mental and personality aspects over looks for example when selecting a meet for the future or long term plans as most know that is what truly makes sex mind-blowing.
For an instant fix such as a quick replacement for a meet or a horny 1130pm had a few to drink and needing gratification meet however, they'd probably tend to prioritise the ripped hunk with not much upstairs and less imagination over the perfect lover who is in fairly good shape as they have a very short space of time to decide and looks/body they can decide on instantly, whereas judging the rest will take too long? |
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"To us a full blown orgy is swinging and having the best sexy fun ever, if your all together in a group cocks, tits, pussys, legs, everywhere who gives a shit who's on the end of them lol. If your that horny at that moment you will take it lol"
It is quite possible to only do what you want to do with people you want to do it with, regardless of the number of people in the room. |
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
So true! It only occurred to us lately that our meets are not with guys who have the best physiques but what the veris have said, we've met guys who have seriously earnt their reputation here over the years. Spending time understanding what fab is all about is time well spent and shows in meets, living in the gym and grooming parlours maybe not so.
I can see it varying to be fair. Obviously everyone wants to meets someone who is perfect for them, be it in body, looks, mind, intellect, technique, outlook, sense of adventure and appetite for mischief, and age whose likes match theirs? And the practical side of course; is available to meet when they are, is nearby, etc, etc. Though satisfying all those requirements would leave the list of potential playmates pretty thin on the ground ha!
So most compromise on one or two of these until their idea of perfection appears, no one in their right mind is going to abstain from sex for months or years on end in the hope perfection is going to come along.
I notice a few potential trends with women for example. Though a meet must still be reasonably attractive to them they as a rule tend to prioritise the mental and personality aspects over looks for example when selecting a meet for the future or long term plans as most know that is what truly makes sex mind-blowing.
For an instant fix such as a quick replacement for a meet or a horny 1130pm had a few to drink and needing gratification meet however, they'd probably tend to prioritise the ripped hunk with not much upstairs and less imagination over the perfect lover who is in fairly good shape as they have a very short space of time to decide and looks/body they can decide on instantly, whereas judging the rest will take too long?"
11:30 p.m., you say?
I would prioritise sleep. A hunk who is also a perfect lover another day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
So true! It only occurred to us lately that our meets are not with guys who have the best physiques but what the veris have said, we've met guys who have seriously earnt their reputation here over the years. Spending time understanding what fab is all about is time well spent and shows in meets, living in the gym and grooming parlours maybe not so. "
Absolutely. Strangely enough some people who do look the most attractive are the most insecure about their bodies. For me I find it far more erotic if if someone is not afraid to throw themselves around naked in the heat of the moment and not be concerned about a few lumps and bumps! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!
Definitely agree that i wouldn't arrange to meet somebody bases purely on their looks as personality is a massive part of the attraction for me. However, there has to be a line somewhere. Unfortunately I've spoken to lots of really great guys but looks wise I just don't find then attractive. It's incredibly frustrating for everyone concerned but you can't/shouldn't force yourself to sleep with somebody just because they're good people. This does mean though that 4 years in and I still haven't found entirely the right person for me! Met somebody really great people but still haven't found the magic combination where I find them physically attractive, mentally stimulating and there's sexual chemistry there with sexual compatibility. I've managed to find so many who tick one or two boxes but not all of them. I think it's likely that those very guys I'm looking for wouldn't find that I tick all of their boxes and so we're back at square one!"
Initially when I was first on here I was like a kid in a sweet shop. I’d message profiles based on their looks often to find there was no mental connection at all. Disappointingly it seemed that some didn’t feel the need to make an effort because their profiles were so popular. Now I’m not so quick to dismiss someone if I don’t get that instant attraction and I find it’s paid off. |
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For us Fab is like window shopping, you can only see whats there to see.
Personality comes through a little if they post to the forums etc and maybe some through their profile blurb.
Its the reason we prefer a social first or just keep play for the clubs.
But agree with most that why would we or anyone else lower our standards on playmates just to get a meet?
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By *iffaWoman
over a year ago
wherever |
I think there has to be a physical attraction. I met someone before because I really liked his personality etc but didn’t find him attractive and it just didn’t go so well for me just couldn’t get in the mood |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand in this world you have to kind of fancy the other person that you may play with but at times it is predictable as to weather you get the response "thanks but no thanks"
It is the same for us aswell as we have said it too but if a good looking couple message us we can guarantee we get the response!!
It's bad but it seems like only good looking people will only meet good looking people!!
Let's see if I'm wrong xx "
one persons good looking can be totally different to somebody elses good looking,
no point in worrying if others say no just move on |
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By *azmar62Couple
over a year ago
Hinckley |
We’re butt fugly. But we are fun, even if we do say so our selves? Charm, wit, being able to hold a conversation? We don’t care what people look like, the attraction comes with connecting with people. Non judgementle, fat or thin, we love you all. Xx |
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"In a one on one, you just need to fancy each other, but for couples you’re looking for both of you to like the look of both of them, and vice versa. Even if you’re not bi, I imagine you need to be comfortable with how the other partner looks."
I don't play ... just my wife does . So what I look like doesn't matter really does it ? I am so totally ambivalent to getting any attention from other women that I now make it clear from the start that I'm not gonna join in . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We’re butt fugly. But we are fun, even if we do say so our selves? Charm, wit, being able to hold a conversation? We don’t care what people look like, the attraction comes with connecting with people. Non judgementle, fat or thin, we love you all. Xx "
I’ve just had a sneaky look at the butt on your profile. Nothing ugly about that! Pretty hot if you don’t mind me saying
V xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with 99% of comments, we prefer personality over looks any day, funny not taking yourself seriously people who we connect with, if they have that ( sonething ) even better.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who decides who's good looking and who's not?
Surely that's dependant on personal taste?"
Exactly our thoughts too.. attractiveness is purely subjective, we can’t please all the people all the time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being on Fab has taught me (V) a valuable lesson. It’s not all about looks. Far more sexy is what goes on in the head. You can be the most drop dead gorgeous person, it doesn’t make you hot between the sheets. I’ve learned to look beyond the physical and found it far more rewarding!"
|
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"In a one on one, you just need to fancy each other, but for couples you’re looking for both of you to like the look of both of them, and vice versa. Even if you’re not bi, I imagine you need to be comfortable with how the other partner looks.
I don't play ... just my wife does . So what I look like doesn't matter really does it ? I am so totally ambivalent to getting any attention from other women that I now make it clear from the start that I'm not gonna join in ."
Thats how we play too.
Mr has no interest other than with me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In a one on one, you just need to fancy each other, but for couples you’re looking for both of you to like the look of both of them, and vice versa. Even if you’re not bi, I imagine you need to be comfortable with how the other partner looks.
I don't play ... just my wife does . So what I look like doesn't matter really does it ? I am so totally ambivalent to getting any attention from other women that I now make it clear from the start that I'm not gonna join in .
Thats how we play too.
Mr has no interest other than with me "
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