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By *oxPhoenix OP Couple
over a year ago
Leicestershire |
Discussion topic please respond your thoughts would be very welcome.
Are we looking in the wrong place?
We would prefer to build a relationship with another female that is open to a polyamorous connection built on trust and understanding. In two situations now we have felt that we are building that trust and connection with a special lady but have come to a fault when things crop up and we're not able to respond to messages fast enough. We obviously don't want to make anyone feel put out but we are both high powered professionals and on occasions that our businesses come first and play come second, we have to work.
Yes I think everybody would love a house in the Bahamas where they could play all day and not have to work, but are we asking too much of potential partner to Bear With Us during a busy periods at work or is fab swinging just about one night stands and no strings attached sagging? |
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If you want to build the kind of connection you describe I think it's reasonable for a person to expect a certain level of communication from you. Without knowing details I can't say if you're asking too much from people or not.
Fab is about one night stands or at least casual sex for many people. Given that you expect a level of commitment beyond that I think you should be prepared to give it too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you want to build the kind of connection you describe I think it's reasonable for a person to expect a certain level of communication from you. Without knowing details I can't say if you're asking too much from people or not.
Fab is about one night stands or at least casual sex for many people. Given that you expect a level of commitment beyond that I think you should be prepared to give it too."
This. It kind of sounds like you want a woman to be there when you want them, and only when you want them. Which doesn't really tie in with the kind of relationship you say you are hoping to build |
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By *exi7000Couple
over a year ago
London |
"If you want to build the kind of connection you describe I think it's reasonable for a person to expect a certain level of communication from you. Without knowing details I can't say if you're asking too much from people or not.
Fab is about one night stands or at least casual sex for many people. Given that you expect a level of commitment beyond that I think you should be prepared to give it too.
This. It kind of sounds like you want a woman to be there when you want them, and only when you want them. Which doesn't really tie in with the kind of relationship you say you are hoping to build"
Spot on!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd say you need to decide between whether you want to swing regularly with a particular woman in quite a fun party like way but really base all your meets except for a first social around sex... and have that develop into a light fun friendship.
Or whether you're looking for a scenario more like having a lover. Where you meet a woman regularly but in a more romantic passionate vein, with much more wining and dining, overnights, maybe even holidays away together. But still very much an addition to all your lives rather than something central to all of them. Although a deep love might flourish from the deep lust you share together.
Or whether you genuinely want a third person in your relationship, helping wash the dishes, hearing how your day at work went, telling you all about their shitty boss, sharing your bed, but also sharing your house. If it's this you're looking for then, as a couple, it really is all down to you to make the space for that third person and welcome her in. If she feels you're not 100% about it she will feel uncomfortable about coming between you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's possible to find and nurture deep friendships on fab as that's how I operate too....but I must admit what confuses me about your post is you then go on to talk about "play" taking second place on occasions. That doesn't read as a mutual friendship, that reads as you still viewing your +1 as a purely sexual addition. May be just how I've read it though. |
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