FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Why are married guys on fab without their partner's knowledge?
Why are married guys on fab without their partner's knowledge?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Not really a criticism but I had a meet with the above a few weeks ago (he didn't tell me until we met in a hotel) and when I asked him what made him join Fab his reply was that his sex life at home was "great but that he liked the excitement of fab". Is that the main reason that draws married people with single profiles to fab then? Just curious |
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I think there have been one or two threads discussing this before, most reasons are in there and conclusions about why those reasons are crap is in there too.
For the bloke you met, what did he say when you asked him why? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As far as I can tell, the same reasons that married women are here without their partners knowledge....and there are a damn sight more than you might think |
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"I think there have been one or two threads discussing this before, most reasons are in there and conclusions about why those reasons are crap is in there too.
For the bloke you met, what did he say when you asked him why?"
As the OP clearly explained in her post "his reply was that his sex life at home was "great but that he liked the excitement of fab". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not really a criticism but I had a meet with the above a few weeks ago (he didn't tell me until we met in a hotel) and when I asked him what made him join Fab his reply was that his sex life at home was "great but that he liked the excitement of fab". Is that the main reason that draws married people with single profiles to fab then? Just curious "
I've literally had someone's wife call me as she went through her husbands phone. Saw our WhatsApp conversation a day before meeting.
Even people who are in commitments don't really take it that seriously.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No sex at home.
Boring sex at home.
Wife doesn't have a cock.
"
Wife doesn't tie them face down to the bed and do unspeakable things to their arses.
Apparently  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case."
Totally agree |
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"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case."
We're all different aren’t we with different thought processes. I don’t believe just because we are on a swingers site that we should be more open to people who cheat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because they want sex with other people while retaining the benefits of the marriage and either know or fear that if their spouse found out, they wouldn't be able to have both. |
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By *nlyfun3Woman
over a year ago
NEAR Berkhamsted,Herts |
"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case.
We're all different aren’t we with different thought processes. I don’t believe just because we are on a swingers site that we should be more open to people who cheat."
The definition of an open relationship or swinging couples to the vanilla world could call it cheating. Its semantics. Why the partner isnt involved on here maybe helping the relationship in other ways that you have no idea of and no ones business. Plus on another note due the response i get being a positive thing that i am married shows double standards to the unnecessary term 'cheat' on here which goes back to my orginal post that open minded swingers arent always as open minded as one would hope but maybe selective open mindedness  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's nothing to do with being open minded. We are both very open minded. In our view it's an argument of morals.
We don't judge those who are in relationships and on the site without knowledge. But we won't ever knowingly play with them. Just because we are swingers doesn't mean we condone such.
If anything we are LESS likely to as it seems counter intuitive for us as a couple ourselves. I know I'd skin my fella alive of I ever caught him upto such a thing without me. |
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But what about the "honest" cheating males? The ones that are "honest" about cheating on their wives/partners without their knowledge.
Or the "FAB straight" males who are one here because their wife isn't called Bernard and doesn't pack ten inches. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case.
We're all different aren’t we with different thought processes. I don’t believe just because we are on a swingers site that we should be more open to people who cheat.
The definition of an open relationship or swinging couples to the vanilla world could call it cheating. Its semantics. Why the partner isnt involved on here maybe helping the relationship in other ways that you have no idea of and no ones business. Plus on another note due the response i get being a positive thing that i am married shows double standards to the unnecessary term 'cheat' on here which goes back to my orginal post that open minded swingers arent always as open minded as one would hope but maybe selective open mindedness "
But if the partner doesn't know or agree then they are cheating.
The inner core of swinging is couples that love each other and love to share sex with others.
I do understand why some people think that swingers would think cheating is ok. I don't understand why some people think that others should respect their opinions when they don't respect other people's. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The issue of open mindedness and swinging. Although I don’t in principle condone cheating, as a swinger, I understand the needs, desires and temptations that other people suffer from. That because I myself suffer from a need for multiple partners, and that additional excitement that only the swinging lifestyle can bring. I am lucky that I married a man who supports me in these needs. Would I cheat if I didn’t have his consent for me to have multiple partners? I hope I wouldn’t. But I don’t really know if temptation would eventually get the better of me. So I do feel that myself, as a swinger, am better placed to to open-minded to people who have the same needs as me but not as lucky as me in having a consenting partner.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Probably the same reasons and excitement that bring the married women on here too  "
 some reason the married men get so much more crap than the married ladies on here I’ve noticed on fab but hey everyone has there own reasons for it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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In answer to a few of your questions we didn't play as his wife took that moment to call him for a lengthy phone chat so maybe she had suspicions anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In my experience because they're too pathetic to discuss their needs with the wifey and generally want either a decent blow job or anal or they just want someone to boss around. They can fuck off I don't aid and abet cheating. |
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Interesting thread.
I’m in the ‘wouldn’t want to meet a cheater’ camp.
It took me a lot to ‘strap a pair on’ and discuss having an open relationship. The freedom and non-guilt is refreshing, like a free bird.
I’m not into letting folk have their cake and eat it. I can’t abide the thought of some poor cow sat at home ironing her husbands shirt thinking he’s ‘working’ when he’s having his fun and making her look a tw*t.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It took me a lot to ‘strap a pair on’ and discuss having an open relationship. The freedom and non-guilt is refreshing, like a free bird.
"
I feel the same, having gone to the trouble of being honest with each other and negotiating the boundaries of our relationship, why should we facilitate those who don't offer their partner the same courtesy? |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Not really a criticism but I had a meet with the above a few weeks ago (he didn't tell me until we met in a hotel) and when I asked him what made him join Fab his reply was that his sex life at home was "great but that he liked the excitement of fab". Is that the main reason that draws married people with single profiles to fab then? Just curious "
Probably the same reasons women who are married come on as singles. However married women saying they are single don't get as much grief as married men! |
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It's more that they claim they are single is the problem.I admit I found site. Without wife knowing about it.but a randy night in a bottle of wine.and a bit of courage. I gathered enough guts to talk with her. And to my delight she was up for it. We been swinging now for seven years
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By *isser36Man
over a year ago
fylde Coast |
"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case.
We're all different aren’t we with different thought processes. I don’t believe just because we are on a swingers site that we should be more open to people who cheat.
The definition of an open relationship or swinging couples to the vanilla world could call it cheating. Its semantics. Why the partner isnt involved on here maybe helping the relationship in other ways that you have no idea of and no ones business. Plus on another note due the response i get being a positive thing that i am married shows double standards to the unnecessary term 'cheat' on here which goes back to my orginal post that open minded swingers arent always as open minded as one would hope but maybe selective open mindedness "
"selective open mindedness"
Yeah that about sums up fab in three words! |
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By *isser36Man
over a year ago
fylde Coast |
"In answer to a few of your questions we didn't play as his wife took that moment to call him for a lengthy phone chat so maybe she had suspicions anyway."
And if she hadn't you would have walked away and not fucked him outraged at the cheek of the guy right?..... Right? ?? ?? ?? |
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I’m honest about this on my profile. Some gannets W on’t speak to me. Some do but only to disagree. However their are people who do meet me because I’m considered less likely to be difficult or more likely to be discreet. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"In answer to a few of your questions we didn't play as his wife took that moment to call him for a lengthy phone chat so maybe she had suspicions anyway.
And if she hadn't you would have walked away and not fucked him outraged at the cheek of the guy right?..... Right? ?? ?? ?? "
O:tbh honest I wouldn't as I have an issue with married guys on fab. I would respect them more if they were open about it on their profile. Would then choose not to meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In answer to a few of your questions we didn't play as his wife took that moment to call him for a lengthy phone chat so maybe she had suspicions anyway.
Damn bloody wife spoiling all the fun!"
This has happened to both of us before. What we did was fuck throughout the phone calls... |
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"In answer to a few of your questions we didn't play as his wife took that moment to call him for a lengthy phone chat so maybe she had suspicions anyway.
Damn bloody wife spoiling all the fun!
This has happened to both of us before. What we did was fuck throughout the phone calls..."
Proud of ya! |
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"The issue of open mindedness and swinging. Although I don’t in principle condone cheating, as a swinger, I understand the needs, desires and temptations that other people suffer from. That because I myself suffer from a need for multiple partners, and that additional excitement that only the swinging lifestyle can bring. I am lucky that I married a man who supports me in these needs. Would I cheat if I didn’t have his consent for me to have multiple partners? I hope I wouldn’t. But I don’t really know if temptation would eventually get the better of me. So I do feel that myself, as a swinger, am better placed to to open-minded to people who have the same needs as me but not as lucky as me in having a consenting partner.
Mrs"
Absolutely right |
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"I’m honest about this on my profile. Some gannets W on’t speak to me. Some do but only to disagree. However their are people who do meet me because I’m considered less likely to be difficult or more likely to be discreet. "
"Gannets"? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the answers I got so far were
a love my wife and don't want to loose her but sex life is non existent
b just need that kick once in a while"
That’s kinda me
A.Sex life is very vanilla, she just doesn’t like anything “weird”
B. I adore new things with new challenges to push all the limits
Why not leave ?
She’s a fantastic mother she’s happy in her “2.4 family life” bubble why burst that ?
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"the answers I got so far were
a love my wife and don't want to loose her but sex life is non existent
b just need that kick once in a while
That’s kinda me
A.Sex life is very vanilla, she just doesn’t like anything “weird”
B. I adore new things with new challenges to push all the limits
Why not leave ?
She’s a fantastic mother she’s happy in her “2.4 family life” bubble why burst that ?
"
So what you're saying is she's convenient. Would she be happy if she found out what yoh were doing while she's blissfully sat at home looking after your kids? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the answers I got so far were
a love my wife and don't want to loose her but sex life is non existent
b just need that kick once in a while
That’s kinda me
A.Sex life is very vanilla, she just doesn’t like anything “weird”
B. I adore new things with new challenges to push all the limits
Why not leave ?
She’s a fantastic mother she’s happy in her “2.4 family life” bubble why burst that ?
So what you're saying is she's convenient. Would she be happy if she found out what yoh were doing while she's blissfully sat at home looking after your kids?"
Here we go
She not sat a home looking after our kids she’s out
Drinking coffee with her friends whilst I’m at work,
Would she be happy ? Well of course not
All her comforts normality would fall apart.
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"We are all here for different reasons. My belief is as swingers we should be more open minded that most people. But unfortunately thats not always the case.
We're all different aren’t we with different thought processes. I don’t believe just because we are on a swingers site that we should be more open to people who cheat.
The definition of an open relationship or swinging couples to the vanilla world could call it cheating. Its semantics. Why the partner isnt involved on here maybe helping the relationship in other ways that you have no idea of and no ones business. Plus on another note due the response i get being a positive thing that i am married shows double standards to the unnecessary term 'cheat' on here which goes back to my orginal post that open minded swingers arent always as open minded as one would hope but maybe selective open mindedness
"selective open mindedness"
Yeah that about sums up fab in three words! "
Hypocrisy rules here.... |
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Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage |
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"I’m honest about this on my profile. Some gannets W on’t speak to me. Some do but only to disagree. However their are people who do meet me because I’m considered less likely to be difficult or more likely to be discreet.
"Gannets"?"
Sorry auto spell. Read fabbers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage "
Which can be achieved without lying or cheating, unless of course the lying and cheating is the source of the thrill.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage
Which can be achieved without lying or cheating, unless of course the lying and cheating is the source of the thrill...."
How? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage
Which can be achieved without lying or cheating, unless of course the lying and cheating is the source of the thrill....
How?"
By honest communication and agreement on opening the relationship - how do you think swinging couples got there? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage
Which can be achieved without lying or cheating, unless of course the lying and cheating is the source of the thrill....
How?"
By taking relationship advice from strangers on the internet who know nothing of you and your partner, or your personal circumstances  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes you can be with someone for a long time and love them dearly, however your sexual desires change for whatever reason. I am not in any way saying it’s right but fab in some ways is the way to fulfil those needs and desire without hopefully splitting up your marriage
Which can be achieved without lying or cheating, unless of course the lying and cheating is the source of the thrill....
How?
By taking relationship advice from strangers on the internet who know nothing of you and your partner, or your personal circumstances "
Clearly only communication with the partner can achieve anything - therein lies the rub of course |
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"I’m honest about this on my profile. Some gannets W on’t speak to me. Some do but only to disagree. However their are people who do meet me because I’m considered less likely to be difficult or more likely to be discreet. "
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"I’m honest about this on my profile. Some gannets W on’t speak to me. Some do but only to disagree. However their are people who do meet me because I’m considered less likely to be difficult or more likely to be discreet. "
I'm upfront about being married in the first line of my profile - it's then entirely up to those who read it whether they choose to contact me or not...
....and yes, there are those who prefer that I'm married for the reasons above - plus others for whom it's an attraction in itself...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because having fun without the risk of losing companionship is cake.
Modern day relationships and lifestyle make it hard to have it all. But the single life has the lonely side which isn't as lonely with a partner/companion.
And as time wears on, the sex becomes less important for some couples. We're all at it like rabbits in the honeymoon period but as things normalise, the kink can dwindle.
Just my thoughts.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because having fun without the risk of losing companionship is cake.
Modern day relationships and lifestyle make it hard to have it all. But the single life has the lonely side which isn't as lonely with a partner/companion.
And as time wears on, the sex becomes less important for some couples. We're all at it like rabbits in the honeymoon period but as things normalise, the kink can dwindle.
Just my thoughts.
"
THANK YOU!
perfect ! but this lady a drink |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because having fun without the risk of losing companionship is cake.
Modern day relationships and lifestyle make it hard to have it all. But the single life has the lonely side which isn't as lonely with a partner/companion.
And as time wears on, the sex becomes less important for some couples. We're all at it like rabbits in the honeymoon period but as things normalise, the kink can dwindle.
Just my thoughts.
THANK YOU!
perfect ! but this lady a drink"
Rum n sir. Thanking you kindly. Dark rum. |
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I think alot of people want the happy family / good lifestyle at home with the wife/husband or partner & then whatever they can find on here or elsewhere even if the sex life at home is ok,some people are greedy & want their cake & eat it & will tell you anything. |
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