FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Question: “Straight” men?
Question: “Straight” men?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Can anyone shed some light or sanity on the metric tons of “straight” men on here who play with men or TVs? Or the Gay/Bi guys who love to play with “straight” men?
I get A LOT of messages of men - which I find flattering and I often reply to Be polite etc - but when I say “thanks, but I’m straight”, a reply I often get is “some of the best sex I’ve had is with straight men”.
Am I the only one who vehemently believes that that makes them, at a minimum, “not” straight? Why do you think men are reluctant to admit they like men, or sex with men, or just like cock? It’s 2018 - it’s all good to like what you like 
Just putting my thoughts down as too long for a status but appreciate input? |
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By *uciyassMan
over a year ago
Blackrock |
It’s just a label that’s been thrown out here so many times. We are all who we are and it’s up to us to say or label ourselves.
However many straight !!!! Guys who meet other guys or tv/ts would be considered Bi in my eyes but for reason only know to themselves they prefer to show as straight |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I don’t want to block them. Like I said I find the interest flattering. You missed the point of the question - it’s more what people believe the definition of “straight” “bi” etc is.
It isn’t a problem - it’s just polling opinio to try and understand. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Its just a spectrum isnt it, everyones different and why not just respect how someone chooses to label themselves instead of trying to label them. "
Well, the site has “labels” as you put it - profiles ask your sexual orientation. Why not choose a label which accurately portrays you, otherwise it’s misinformation? just my opinion but I class that “label” as important as others about a person - height. Smoker status etc. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t want to block them. Like I said I find the interest flattering. You missed the point of the question - it’s more what people believe the definition of “straight” “bi” etc is.
It isn’t a problem - it’s just polling opinio to try and understand. "
If their profile says straight and they are checking you out then they are 'fab straight'  |
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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago
In a sleepy little village |
"I don’t want to block them. Like I said I find the interest flattering. You missed the point of the question - it’s more what people believe the definition of “straight” “bi” etc is.
It isn’t a problem - it’s just polling opinio to try and understand. "
I'm not missing the point of the question, I simply just don't care to judge what others choose to define themselves as or second guess why |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You will drive yourself crazy trying to understand this..
Does it REALLY matter? Lots of
Women and Men lie in order to get laid! Fact...
Carry on having fun ..
Utilize don't analyse"
No. It doesn’t matter. That’s why it’s a question asking opinion. Lots of people ask questions to try and understand something. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its just a spectrum isnt it, everyones different and why not just respect how someone chooses to label themselves instead of trying to label them.
Well, the site has “labels” as you put it - profiles ask your sexual orientation. Why not choose a label which accurately portrays you, otherwise it’s misinformation? just my opinion but I class that “label” as important as others about a person - height. Smoker status etc. "
Yeh but they might see it differently to you so why is it yours to worry about. They might be say 90/10 in favour of women in their attraction, and mostly be on this site for just that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny, I get the exact same messages. Possibly 90% of the mail I get seems to be from straight guys offering to do, well, everything. Whilst it is flattering, and it's nice to get, at least, some mail, I do see your point. It's not exactly straight, mailing other men asking if they want a blow job.
Still, it's nice to be asked.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s behind closed doors on here, people can be who they really want and live out their sexual fantasy.
I do not think having sex with a man is traditionally gay, falling in love with a man is, in my opinion.
Plus there’s 2 types of men being “Gay”
Gay 1 - A man who has a relationship with another man, and regularly takes his cock in all holes.
Gay 2 - a straight man, who can’t drink, throw a rugby ball, lift weights or knows how to treat a woman.
True story. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are you sure you are 'straight '& not just a teeny weeny bit curious?
"
Yeah, I’m absolutely sure. I have no physical or sexual attraction to men at all. But that’s just me and my orientation. I just think it’s 2018 - we are all unique and different and who cares? That’s what makes Fab great (at times) it’s that it should be an inclusive environment where people can be which they are. Not publicly state one thing and privately seek something else. To me, that’s deception. But, as always, just my opinion |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Disclaimer!!
I do not find men “sexually” attractive or would want to kiss, fuck or suck any, or have it done to myself.
I do however feel confident in myself to appreciate a decent man’s body, or admit he’s good looking.
Patrick Sawyze, in Dirty Dancing, if I was gay..........  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Some horny men will fuck anything. Fucking and relationships have differing standards."
Very true. A LOT of men I bet, will have sex with men and women on here, they wouldn’t feel comfortable with their friends/family seeing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So maybe your not that "straight" if you find the attention of men flattering  
 "
I wouldn't say that.
It's a nice feeling, to receive a compliment, no matter who it's from, if it's well meant and honest. |
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By *hoot45Man
over a year ago
Ramsgate |
"Funny, I get the exact same messages. Possibly 90% of the mail I get seems to be from straight guys offering to do, well, everything. Whilst it is flattering, and it's nice to get, at least, some mail, I do see your point. It's not exactly straight, mailing other men asking if they want a blow job.
Still, it's nice to be asked.
"
Well your pics are def in the homoerotic side and I guess guys take a chance. Nothing ventured, nothing gained I guess |
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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago
Bristol East |
"Can anyone shed some light or sanity on the metric tons of “straight” men on here who play with men or TVs? Or the Gay/Bi guys who love to play with “straight” men?
I get A LOT of messages of men - which I find flattering and I often reply to Be polite etc - but when I say “thanks, but I’m straight”, a reply I often get is “some of the best sex I’ve had is with straight men”.
Am I the only one who vehemently believes that that makes them, at a minimum, “not” straight? Why do you think men are reluctant to admit they like men, or sex with men, or just like cock? It’s 2018 - it’s all good to like what you like
Just putting my thoughts down as too long for a status but appreciate input? "
Why does the action of complete strangers annoy you so much?
If gay sex is not your thing, the answer is simple - don't have gay sex.
It aint rocket science.
|
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I'm even more surprised at the number of men who are quite specific on their profile that they are not looking for single men, who contact someone like me looking for fun. There are a lot of men who are still afraid to admit what they want. (I can understand it more with people my age, but less with younger guys.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm even more surprised at the number of men who are quite specific on their profile that they are not looking for single men, who contact someone like me looking for fun. There are a lot of men who are still afraid to admit what they want. (I can understand it more with people my age, but less with younger guys.) "
These people just want to cum. Probably can't get a meet with a woman so try men just to cum and go |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've blocked all men as I don't want to meet them. I also don't understand how anyone who is straight feels flattered that men are messaging them.
Only people I want messages from are people I want to have sex with.
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"I've blocked all men as I don't want to meet them. I also don't understand how anyone who is straight feels flattered that men are messaging them.
Only people I want messages from are people I want to have sex with.
"
Thats completely your decision but its rather sad that you are shutting out the bulk of the membership of the site. They are not all after your bum im sure.
I know plenty of straight single guys who chat and indeed meet for a pint and chat just because its sometimes good to share time and experiences with others of a similar mindset.
3 of my old fwb now team up for parties and are very sucessful with the ladies. They know each other well enough to be comfortable with each other creating a better dynamic for the ladies they meet. |
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By *ransGuyTV/TS
over a year ago
Cardiff |
A lot of guys won't admit on their profiles that they are bi because it puts some women off and so limits their chances of meeting women.
Because they lie on their profiles they assume that other guys are doing the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't underestimate the power of kink and perversion! You stay on here a while and your kink fabric gets stretched... You crave more filth. I think its often the same for women too. I'm at my most perverted straight after a club meet where I need more filth to satisfy my cravings. My porn consumption goes up tenfold and gets more extreme (gay porn a fav). Fantasy can get blurred... Curiosity can get the better of you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s quite simple, they’re not straight. You can’t have sex with another man regardless of the amount of lipstick and women’s clothes he wears and call yourself straight. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can anyone shed some light or sanity on the metric tons of “straight” men on here who play with men or TVs? Or the Gay/Bi guys who love to play with “straight” men?
I get A LOT of messages of men - which I find flattering and I often reply to Be polite etc - but when I say “thanks, but I’m straight”, a reply I often get is “some of the best sex I’ve had is with straight men”.
Am I the only one who vehemently believes that that makes them, at a minimum, “not” straight? Why do you think men are reluctant to admit they like men, or sex with men, or just like cock? It’s 2018 - it’s all good to like what you like
Just putting my thoughts down as too long for a status but appreciate input? "
For many years I was just straight and then from mmf and large amounts porn watching I noticed I spend a lot of time looking at cock ?
Maybe that imprints in some way ? I admire a nice cock but I have to be in the mood, the thought of pussy makes my mouth drool where as cock is much more about control ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many men are fab straight,so hide their bi side in the hope of getting more meets.
On here bi women are encouraged ,but seems men not so much.
Miss"
This absolutely hits the nail on the head! |
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Just a thought, but instead of having labels like "Gay" "straight etc, which brings up all sorts of issues about personal identity and so on, just have a tick box menue as follows
" who do you like to have sex with (tick one)
People with penises
People with vaginas
Both of the above"
There you are no room for ambiguity there |
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By *hoot45Man
over a year ago
Ramsgate |
"I think it’s a bit disrespectful to carry on asking to meet a man who has said ‘no thankyou I am straight’
I wouldn’t keep telling a gay man to come lick me after he said he is homosexual.
"
It’s demeaning to keep chasing anyone who is not interested - there are plenty more pebbles on the beach |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely the term bi curious is what fits the straight guys who play with gay or bisexual men.
I've also had messages from bi guys wanting a straight guy.
I also find the 'offer' flattering but not the act itself. I'm not interested in it, but out of politeness, I do reply.
I've never had a problem |
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There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so. "
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you sure you are 'straight '& not just a teeny weeny bit curious?
Yeah, I’m absolutely sure. I have no physical or sexual attraction to men at all. But that’s just me and my orientation. I just think it’s 2018 - we are all unique and different and who cares? That’s what makes Fab great (at times) it’s that it should be an inclusive environment where people can be which they are. Not publicly state one thing and privately seek something else. To me, that’s deception. But, as always, just my opinion "
They may have friends on here that think they are straight. Being a bi man is a horrendously disgusting thing (to some people)- perhaps they don't want to be thought of that way.
I prefer to keep my private life private so I understand why they do it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought, but instead of having labels like "Gay" "straight etc, which brings up all sorts of issues about personal identity and so on, just have a tick box menue as follows
" who do you like to have sex with (tick one)
People with penises
People with vaginas
Both of the above"
There you are no room for ambiguity there "
I agree. I'd prefer the 'sexuality' tick box to be removed. |
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"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so.
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so?"
That's the logic and I don't get it either. It's the triumph of radical subjectivism. Anyone can say they are whatever they want to be and it's offensive to tell them they are wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so.
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so?
That's the logic and I don't get it either. It's the triumph of radical subjectivism. Anyone can say they are whatever they want to be and it's offensive to tell them they are wrong. "
The worlds gone mad. That’s like saying you’re a vegitarian while you’re chomping on a big fat steak. |
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"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so.
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so?
That's the logic and I don't get it either. It's the triumph of radical subjectivism. Anyone can say they are whatever they want to be and it's offensive to tell them they are wrong.
The worlds gone mad. That’s like saying you’re a vegitarian while you’re chomping on a big fat steak. "
Ah, but you may feel a deep seated identification with vegetarianism even whilst not being able to stop yourself eating meat. Hence you're a vegetarian.
As I say, it's radical subjectivism. The view that what is ultimately real is ones own internal feelings and that what happens externally is secondary. It's a commonly held view, but being an old fashioned philosophical materialist I can't be doing with it.
Hence I get in lots of arguments with people who say that one can be a woman if one identifies as a woman or a Christian even if one's lifestyle radically contradicts Christian doctrine. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so.
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so?
That's the logic and I don't get it either. It's the triumph of radical subjectivism. Anyone can say they are whatever they want to be and it's offensive to tell them they are wrong.
The worlds gone mad. That’s like saying you’re a vegitarian while you’re chomping on a big fat steak.
Ah, but you may feel a deep seated identification with vegetarianism even whilst not being able to stop yourself eating meat. Hence you're a vegetarian.
As I say, it's radical subjectivism. The view that what is ultimately real is ones own internal feelings and that what happens externally is secondary. It's a commonly held view, but being an old fashioned philosophical materialist I can't be doing with it.
Hence I get in lots of arguments with people who say that one can be a woman if one identifies as a woman or a Christian even if one's lifestyle radically contradicts Christian doctrine. "
I’m with you, it’s common sense, you can’t be a veggie and eat meat, you can’t be straight and suck cock and you can’t be a woman if you have a cock. You can’t just change the rules to suit yourself. |
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"There's three aspects to sexuality:
Identity
Attraction
Behaviour
You don't need all three to be straight or gay. You can identify as gay or straight but still be attracted with or without acting on it.
The combinations are fun. But I believe you are only gay or straight if you identify as being so.
So by that notion if you identify as being straight but have sex with other men you are still straight, is that so?
That's the logic and I don't get it either. It's the triumph of radical subjectivism. Anyone can say they are whatever they want to be and it's offensive to tell them they are wrong.
The worlds gone mad. That’s like saying you’re a vegitarian while you’re chomping on a big fat steak.
Ah, but you may feel a deep seated identification with vegetarianism even whilst not being able to stop yourself eating meat. Hence you're a vegetarian.
As I say, it's radical subjectivism. The view that what is ultimately real is ones own internal feelings and that what happens externally is secondary. It's a commonly held view, but being an old fashioned philosophical materialist I can't be doing with it.
Hence I get in lots of arguments with people who say that one can be a woman if one identifies as a woman or a Christian even if one's lifestyle radically contradicts Christian doctrine.
I’m with you, it’s common sense, you can’t be a veggie and eat meat, you can’t be straight and suck cock and you can’t be a woman if you have a cock. You can’t just change the rules to suit yourself. "
The basic contradiction in the subjective theory of identity is that terms like "straight" "woman" and "vegetarian" is that they refer to terms that necessarily have objective definitions.
Hence if you say "I am straight because I feel straight", the term is literally meaningless unless you have a definition of what "straight" is. And if you have such a definition then you can no longer define yourself subjectively. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you sure you are 'straight '& not just a teeny weeny bit curious?
Yeah, I’m absolutely sure. I have no physical or sexual attraction to men at all. But that’s just me and my orientation. I just think it’s 2018 - we are all unique and different and who cares? That’s what makes Fab great (at times) it’s that it should be an inclusive environment where people can be which they are. Not publicly state one thing and privately seek something else. To me, that’s deception. But, as always, just my opinion
They may have friends on here that think they are straight. Being a bi man is a horrendously disgusting thing (to some people)- perhaps they don't want to be thought of that way.
I prefer to keep my private life private so I understand why they do it. "
If friends can't accept you for what you are, then they aren't worth being friends with in he first place.
|
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"In our experience there is no such thing.
Watch porn? You are looking at another man's cock and are turned on.
Voyeur? Same thing.
Group sex? Same thing
Threesome? Same again.
"
when I see a penis in porn the penis doesn't turn me on. The act of penetration, and the idea that the penis would be mine turns me on. I have no desire to touch a penis, or be touched by a penis. I say I'm straight because I am. If there's a spectrum, as far as I'm concerned I'm at the very edge of it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you sure you are 'straight '& not just a teeny weeny bit curious?
Yeah, I’m absolutely sure. I have no physical or sexual attraction to men at all. But that’s just me and my orientation. I just think it’s 2018 - we are all unique and different and who cares? That’s what makes Fab great (at times) it’s that it should be an inclusive environment where people can be which they are. Not publicly state one thing and privately seek something else. To me, that’s deception. But, as always, just my opinion
They may have friends on here that think they are straight. Being a bi man is a horrendously disgusting thing (to some people)- perhaps they don't want to be thought of that way.
I prefer to keep my private life private so I understand why they do it.
If friends can't accept you for what you are, then they aren't worth being friends with in he first place.
"
Bit late to realise they are shite friends when they 'out' the poor guy though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because sadly, even on a site like this...
Bi Woman = Awesome, Amazing, Everyone wants one, extremely sexual and fun
Bi Men = Eww, who knows where he's been, probably doesn't practice safe sex, riddled with STD's
We've seen that a lot, especially on Women's profiles, so a lot of men on here will lie and put straight when they're really Bi.
We'd just prefer people to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because sadly, even on a site like this...
Bi Woman = Awesome, Amazing, Everyone wants one, extremely sexual and fun
Bi Men = Eww, who knows where he's been, probably doesn't practice safe sex, riddled with STD's
We've seen that a lot, especially on Women's profiles, so a lot of men on here will lie and put straight when they're really Bi.
We'd just prefer people to be honest."
That's the problem, people are still inn the dark age when it comes to a bi male, but when it's the female they are 110% all for it.
Fuck em all... it's 2018 |
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"Many men are fab straight,so hide their bi side in the hope of getting more meets.
On here bi women are encouraged ,but seems men not so much.
Miss"
Spot on
Messaged a couple who have a list of straight guys who have left verifications on their profile.
Even though couple state they only want bi men I thought I'd try my luck as a straight guy since they've met a lot of straight guys.
The hubby messaged back saying that I'm not what they're looking for.
Not a problem with me. I apologised and told him I only messaged after I saw they had met lots of straight guys so thought it was ok to see if they were interested. He replied back saying unfortunately, a lot of straight guys on Fabs lie about their sexuality to get meets.
In 2018, I can't understand why on a site such as this, with sexually liberated people, bi guys need to lie about being straight so they don't sabotage future meets 
Be proud of who you are and wear it like a badge |
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By *hoot45Man
over a year ago
Ramsgate |
I’m a great fan of bi curious and bi guys - my experiences with them have been great. Most of them are not ‘out’ as bi because of their individual circumstances, but I respect that. However, I find then open and fun and sometimes downright filthy lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In 2018, I can't understand why on a site such as this, with sexually liberated people, bi guys need to lie about being straight so they don't sabotage future meets
Because there are a lot of couples who will not meet a bisexual man, or even a couple with a bisexual man in it. So the guys lie. Simple."
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Perhaps instead of the binary sexual orientation choices (straight, bi, gay etc), Fab offered a 1 - 10 scale you could choose from where 1 is dead straight, 10 is gay, and 2 - 9 gradual stages in between.
2 could be where you might never do anything with somebody of the same sex, but are flattered by the attention of other men/women etc. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have heard rumours that on here labels such as height, age, gender, relationship status etc. are often widely misinterpreted.
If that is the case it seems widely naive to expect any accuracy on sexual preferences.
 |
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"In our experience there is no such thing.
Watch porn? You are looking at another man's cock and are turned on.
"
I have a straight friend who will not watch porn with penises in it.
Strictly solo and lesbian porn. |
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"Can anyone shed some light or sanity on the metric tons of “straight” men on here who play with men or TVs? Or the Gay/Bi guys who love to play with “straight” men?
I get A LOT of messages of men - which I find flattering and I often reply to Be polite etc - but when I say “thanks, but I’m straight”, a reply I often get is “some of the best sex I’ve had is with straight men”.
Am I the only one who vehemently believes that that makes them, at a minimum, “not” straight? Why do you think men are reluctant to admit they like men, or sex with men, or just like cock? It’s 2018 - it’s all good to like what you like
Just putting my thoughts down as too long for a status but appreciate input? "
When a "straight" man messages me, I reply 'thanks, but I'm male " unless he is inviting me to a party with a lady or two.
Most times it's just "you free now" rather than an explanation of what they're looking for. |
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